This is honestly the best guide to nonbinary genders and the use of they/them that I have read (and I am overly invested in that specific category of books). Stuart puts so much of themself in the book that it feels real and authentic, more than just a how-to-manual. The jokes can get a little cheesy at times, but overall the tone is light and funny. I love how well it's organized, you can easily go to a specific place for whatever you're looking for. The art is adorable. I'll be buying this as soon as it comes out, maybe a copy for some of my family members too. I recommend this to anyone curious about the use of they/them pronouns, anyone who uses them, all educators and medical professionals, and anyone who wants to be a better ally. Thank you, Stuart, for writing this.

I am so thankful I had the opportunity to review How to They/Them by Stuart Getty through NetGalley.
If you are trying to educate yourself about them/they, this is an excellent resource. It was accessible and easy to understand. While the author even states that their opinions/advice are not going to be the same for everyone and apply in all situations, it is a good stating point. I also appreciated all the illustrations and the humor sprinkled in.

This was a truly stunning, informative read! The illustrations were adorable and made learning even easier. I would definitely recommend this to people who know nothing about the topic as they will truly learn everything they need to know about it.

5/5 for a job well done.

This is a visual guide to the use of they/them pronouns and the spectrum of gender identities.
That means that we have a complicated topic broken down in small and manageable chunks which are accompanied by illustrations and graphics to make understanding easier.
This is not a graphic novel in the sense of having a plot that you can watch and read at the same time.

I liked that the very first thing was a pronounciation guide for speaking them, because you know, the English th sound is not found in every language and in my schooling was considered the mark of a top-grade pupil. When speaking to German native speakers in English, sink and think sound the same in many cases.

After the introduction of the words we have an introduction of the author, Stuart, and their journey of self-discovery. In an academic text, this would be the "why the author thinks they have the knowledge and authority to speak on this topic", the introduction of the speaker.
It's important. I came for a non-cis person speaking about this topic because some cis people tell me what they think if I want to hear it or not.

The main part is divided in three:
- theory (sex assigned at birth, gender identity, sexual orientation)
- practise (what to answer upon grammatical questions or questions in general)
- fun observations (queer history) and not so fun observations (things that suck)

Since I am non binary and have had to do my research, this book told me only a few new things, like terms for non binary identities in different cultures. It's always fun to learn more!
But I think that this is a great guide. It's aimed at:
- enby peole seeking validation
- curious people seeking a comprehensible explanation
- teacher's and parents who want to know how to approach this topic with children
- professionals that have non binary clients
- people who like doodles

It feels very inclusive. The history clearly states that the gender binary as we know it is a recent thing white people invented and that became big. The author tells us that when in doubt, just ask. When you make a mistake, apologise and go on. Just try to do your best.
Stuart even tells us that their view is that of a white westerner because that's what they are.

So, if you're wondering now if you should give this a go, I'd say yes.
If you're further wondering what my pronouns are: They/them. If you want to tell me your preferred pronouns, go on, I'll listen.

I recieved a copy of this book in exchange for a honest review.

I was so happy when I saw that the publisher granted me my wish! I immediately started reading this and finished it in one go.

I loved this! It's a really quick read, It's filled with facts, FAQ's and personal background stories of the author. I loved the illustrations and the personal anecdotes of the author really gave context to the information. Amazing. Informative. Important. A must read. Really recommend reading this when it comes out this September.

This book is amazing, educational, didactic and entertaining. Times change and these kinds of conversations become not only necessary, but something that should be mandatory.

Changing our language and worldviews can be a slow process, but it has to start somewhere. This book is perfect for any audience and a must in your bookshelf.

This is a well written and beautiful book with so much useful information in. If you're non-binary, questioning or wanting to understand gender identity more, this would be a great addition for your book shelf.

The book is informative and witty. It's present clearly and is easy to understand. It discusses the different gender identities and different situations. Such as what to do if you dead name someone or misgender them.

This would be a great resource for people who have a loved one who is questioning or recently came out.

This book is an informative read for all who want to dip into LGBTQ+ history and the importance of pronouns and words. Stuart Getty has written candidly and uses illustrations and model conversations to troubleshoot questions and conversations about gender neutral pronouns. I would recommend this to anyone interested in learning how to be more inclusive and considerate of others. I can see myself dipping into this book during form time when the conversation about why certain words can be damaging to others and why others do not find them damaging,

There seem to be more and more titles on this topic becoming available. What makes this one unique as a graphic novel is that it's a very quick read, not too much info, can be read in a single sitting and referred to again later. That being said, I don't think the content does a lot of new/different stuff from other books and resources in this area. Which is fine, because the basics really do need to be covered for so many people still.

Being an educator, I am always looking to keep up with trends and what is popular. Within this past year I have learned about the they/them pronoun and it is something that I have always wanted to educate myself about further. I absolutely LOVED this book. Stuart Getty approaches the topic with easy to understand language, humorous illustrations, and reliability. After reading this book I feel more informed without having been bored with doing so. The book is a quick read and I am glad I requested it. It has allowed me the opportunity to reflect on how I approach gender and will allow me to be a better educator. I look forward to buying this book when it comes out to share with others.

How to They/Them: A Visual Guide to Nonbinary Pronouns and the World of Gender Fluidity is an accessible and easy read and makes a fun and worthwhile educational tool for both young people and adults.

This short non-fiction guide to using they/them pronouns is accessible, fun to read, and highly informative. It has a combination of text and illustrations on almost every one of it's 237 pages. I enjoyed the visuals and the personal stories of the author, which are told with an easy-going and super likable tone.

Some of the visuals are really informative: like the diagram of their coming out journey, or the pie chart of the most used neutral pronouns. And others are beautiful and poetic: like flowers growing out of each of the letters in the word "weird," or a page full of eyes.

I would highly recommend this book for high school libraries and public libraries. And honestly, maybe this should be required reading for anyone who works with the public.

This guide is incredibly informative without the author taking themselves too seriously or the text getting overly academic. I love the diy/zine-like quality of the illustrations and charts woven throughout the book, making it more fun and visually appealing. Overall, I'd say it's a non-judgemental, accessible, well-written introduction to non-binary identities (and gender in general really) and the use of they/them.

I would recommend this for people who are fuzzy on the subject and would like a good primer.

Language evolves to meet new needs and has done so for a very long time.  The use of they/them in new contexts is part of that history.  It is important that language be responsive and make sense.  In this book, the author provides a good explanation for the current addition of they/them as a singular pronoun that is responsive to our current time.


The author provides history and engages in dialogue with the reader, all the while helping readers to embrace adding to their vocabularies.  This book is recommended for those who want to educate themselves and others in their lives.  Many thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for this title in exchange for an honest review.

I'm really excited to purchase this book for my workplace Pride Employee Resource Group library. There's so much call for digestible educational tools that can reach people across all levels of exposure to concepts of gender identity. This will certainly be one I hand out to colleagues looking to learn.

Very informative guide for the realm of they vs them. Not only is the definitions personal to the author they also give insight into the other definitions as it relates to gender, sexuality and the LGBTQIA community. A good resource for all.

Between this and the "Quick and Easy Guide to They/Them Pronouns" by Archie Bongiovanni, if you still don't get it, it's intentional. Don't give me any of your "it's not grammatically correct" BS because they as a gender neutral goes back to Billy Shakes. And don't try with the "it's hard to learn new words" thing because you learn new words every year as trends pop up. Just listen to what people say and use the pronouns they ask you to use (see that singular they I used in a sentence in a way I'm sure you've used multiple times without realizing it?). This is such an easy concept that can mean so much to a person, so don't be an asshole--just use the right pronouns.

How to They/Them is an approachable "gender-friendly primer" about gender expression and how to get oneself comfortable with using they/them pronouns. The book is highly informative in that it differentiates between sex (at birth), sexuality, and gender and utilizes a broad spectrum to encouage the reader to look beyond the binary. The tone of the book is conversational and lighthearted and the Q and A sections are honest, clear, and often humorous. If you have had a difficult time adjusting to they/them pronouns or if you are thinking that you or a loved one may identify as they/them, but are still trying to figure it out, then this reference book is a good starting point. There is one particular section that I really appreciated: the author addresses how to talk to children about they/them, and as an educator I have often wondered how best to be more sensitive to my students who identify with they/them pronouns. After reading Getty's advice I feel much more prepared.

I rated this book a 3.5: while the information is sound and the author's personal examples are helpful, I was sometimes confused by the overly conversational tone (leading to rereading sections to clarify) and I found the illustrations distracting.

Advanced copy provided by the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. Available September 2020.

This is a lighthearted but very informative guide to everything you wanted to know about pronouns, gender fluidity and such but were afraid to ask. It's illustrated in black and white with lots of arrows, sketches and humor. The author is non-binary and tells their story along with background info on pronouns, FAQs and much more. I wasn't a big fan of the tone (it's sort of cutesy/funny in an almost condescending way) but it's good info. I know I had a ton of questions when this was new to me, and others in that boat will find most of the answers in this short but informative, helpful book.

I read a temporary digital ARC of this book for review.

This is such a fantastic book!
Wonderfully illustrated, it explains everything gender identity in such a simple, straightforward way that it really makes you wonder why it is such a subject of controversy still. I wish every single person would read this book!