Happy Book Birthday to TOUGH LIKE MUM by Lana Button, illustrated by Carmen Mok!

Asking for help and advocating for what you need can be hard. Tough Like Mum is about a single mother and her daughter Kim who have gotten good at pushing through. But Kim starts to see that her mum is really struggling, and that maybe they need to ask for help.

I teared up the first time I read this book (thanks to #NetGalley and Tundra Books for making a Digital ARC available for me to read). I want to champion books on my page that encourage conversation with kids about mental health. I struggle with my own mental health and I can see this book being an excellent way to talk about depression with children. Open conversations about a parent struggling with mental health can help kids to see that it isn’t their fault or on them to fix everything, while understanding that there will be hard days. Toughness can be asking for the help you need.

I’ve really been enjoying Carmen Mok’s illustration as I’ve focused more on Canadian picture books this year, and I think her style is really lovely for this story. The dark shades used convey the weight of the situation, but there is still a warmth there reflecting all of the love.

Recommended ages 3-7

Tough Like Mum was not what I was expecting at all. This is the story of a mum that is struggling. She might be depressed, but she definitely has financial difficulties. Kim sees a mom who is sometimes really happy and sometimes does not want to get out of bed. She doesn't like to ask for help, so her daughter takes on a lot of responsibility. Kim doesn't know why her mom is having a hard day, she just sees when things go right and is proud when she hears people say that she is "tough like her mum." When it comes to going on a class trip, Kim will not be able to go unless mum signs the paper saying she can not pay for the trip. Having been an administrator at a school that had a lot of students whose families struggled, this book hit home with me. It is important that children see that parents are not perfect, and that they may have difficulties and need to ask for help. My four year old granddaughter did not understand the message here, and I believe it is geared to children a bit older. I think it is important for adults to hear this message as well, as sometimes it is too easy to be judgmental. The publisher generously provided me with a copy of this book upon request. The rating and opinions shared are my own.

What does it mean to be tough?
That's the focus of this book about a young girl and her mother. When she wakes up in the morning and her mom is still sleeping, the girl makes her own breakfast and lunch because she is tough like her mum.

She doesn't need to wear a hat in cold weather because she is tough like her mum.

Throughout the school day she hides her feelings - the good ones and bad - because she is tough like her mum.

When her teacher calls her over to talk about the field trip form and explains that her mom just has to check the box that says they can't afford to pay, she doesn't cry because she is tough like her mum.

After school Mum doesn't seem to be having a good day. The daughter makes cold tomato soup that she shares with her. The two end up laughing and then when the mom sees the field trip form, she puts on her tough face, checks the box and signs the form.

I'm still not sure what it means to be tough. Maybe it means that no matter how hard things are, you don't give up. Maybe it means that no matter how much you feel, you don't let the outside world know. I think it also means that when you love someone, you do what you need to do for them, even if it means asking for help.

I couldn't find anything about how Carmen Mok created the art for this, but after watching some of her videos, it looks like she sketches ideas and uses water colour pencils and crayons. I appreciate how much her images add emotional nuance to the story.

While I think this is an important issue to explore in a children's book, I feel like there was a lot missing to make this book a resource to help children, or to even begin discussions around the issues presented in this book, such as poverty and putting on a brave face to hide how you really feel. Sometimes the wording was a bit jarring, leaving me puzzled as to what was trying to be conveyed by the main character. This book was a snapshot of a hard life, but it feels blurry and underdeveloped.

There are many kids who would relate to Tough Like Mom. It’s a very realistic picture book about a daughter trying to be tough to get by each day by acting in the way she views her mom. She acts tough even when she feels sad, mad, happy, or proud. Her true feelings are held back to be more like her mom who is struggling right now in a way portrayed by what may be an emotional and financial situation.

The artwork was wonderful. It’s not your typical happy, cheery, bubbly picture book that pretends like these issues don’t exist for kids. It was refreshing to see a book that represents another side to childhood and parenthood that is all too relatable. I think this story could have a very powerful message for some kids who have parents going through tough times and to remind children and parents that not everyone’s childhood is all sunshine and rainbows with no worries in sight.

I would highly recommend this book!

Thank you to NetGalley and Penguin Random House Canada & Tundra Books for this digital ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Lana Button is an expert in creating children’s books that cover some pretty important social-emotional topics. In her new picture book illustrated by Carmen Mok, Tough Like Mom we meet a family working hard during a tough time. Kim is a little girl who spends a lot of time helping out her mom. Her mom is a tough woman but at times struggles to get out of bed and make sure there is enough milk in the fridge.

It can be so difficult to ask for help. In the story, Kim is navigating all of the feelings she is experiencing. She feels confident in being able to take care of herself and her mom but also feels mad and sad at times when her classmates point out her sandwich is made from the butt ends of the loaf of bread or when the teacher shows her the I need help check box on the field trip form or when mom can’t get out of bed.

The topic of parental depression and poverty is not widely addressed in picture books even though we know 1 in 5 children in Canada live in conditions of poverty. Living below the poverty line can sometimes go hand in hand with mental illness. Lana Button addresses both of these topics straightforwardly. She doesn’t over simplify, doesn’t scare and doesn’t try to tell her reader that everything is fine. There are so many feelings built into the book that are addressed head on, that are named and the child in the story uses tools to help her with those feelings. So many children will feel less alone when enjoying this story. Also, adults reading this story will gain a very important reminder, especially teachers, about how they can support students and families like Kim’s.

The illustrations by Carmen Mok are perfect. Her style lends itself to the tone and the feeling of this story impeccably. The people in the story are realistic and the pages are not overly filled with extras. The illustrations are soothing and wrap the reader in a great big hug.

Awe thanks his book just touches my heart. I read this over and over again to my grandchildren. I highly recommend this book.

I loved certain aspects of this and had some issues with others. I loved how it showed that mothers don't always need to be on the ball and doing everything to be good mothers. However, it felt like it was glorifying a child being responsible for adult tasks which I did not like. I am completely okay with a child HELPING with dinner, but they shouldn't feel like they have to make it or they wont be able to eat? And glorifying THAT is an issue with me.

I am not a huge fan of star ratings, as everyone uses stars differently. (Some of my absolute favourite books didn't get 5 stars because of pacing or prose or lack of a diverse cast.) - if I have to rate this it would be a 2.5!

This was such a sweet book! I loved the message behind it, and the ending totally made me tear up. This book deals with the importance of children knowing and understanding that adults aren’t always perfect and humans in general aren’t always feeling 100% okay, but that it’s okay to need help.

Tough like mom. Sometimes I wish I were tough as my mom was.
A wonderful book. Will be on the lookout for it when it comes out

This book broke me, in the best possible way. A young girl navigated a day where her mum can’t get out of bed. We see a glimpse of their lives, and there’s sorrow, hardship, joy, and triumph. I loved this book and I think every child should read it. It’s the kind of book that stirs up empathy and shows us strength in the face of adversity. I loved it.

This tender story is both heartbreaking and heartwarming. It will generate lots of discussion regarding different types of families and the struggles that some unfortunately experience.

Kim and her mom have a very special relationship. Both have to appear tough as her mom is plagued with bouts of depression that leave her unable to cope with her day. Often her mom is unable to get out of bed thus leaving Kim to fend for herself. Kim makes her own breakfast and school lunch, dresses herself, (hopefully adequately) for the cold weather outside, and tries to solve problems that only an adult is capable of fixing for her. She then comes home from school and takes care of her beloved mom by making her soup to eat as she hasn't eaten all day. The black cloud that envelops her mom lifts.

Both mother and daughter need to show toughness to survive the difficult hand that they have been dealt in life but together they can make it through another day. They are bonded by love and they acknowledge that sometimes being tough opens you up to vulnerablity by needing other's to help you too. I highly recommend this book.

I am a huge fan of Lana Button, and she has not disappointed me with Tough Like Mum. Tackling the difficult subject of a child with a parent struggling with depression, the story brings forward the difficulties of the unknown which can be a hard subject for any child to tackle.

Review will post on blog Nov 22, 2020.

This was not at all what I expected, but wonderfully so. I teared up a little bit near the end. As a mother, this really hit home and it made me appreciate the story that much more.

The book's message is clear; it is delivered in a light way for children, but in a stronger, more impactful way for adults.
The author highlights that although Kim's mother, Jen, doesn't ever ask for help, it doesn't make her any less strong for accepting help.

Kim doesn't know the details of why her mom is having a hard day, she just sees the silver lining in the little things. She is just proud to be tough like her mom.

I requested and received this book from Lana Button and Penguin Random House Canada through NetGalley in exchange for my honest opinion.

This was an awesome book. To me this book is presenting a mom who is struggling to make ends meet and possibly dealing with depression. Her daughter sees a mom who is sometimes really happy and sometimes does not want to get out of bed. I think it is important for kids to see that everyone does not have a perfect home life. Sometimes in life you need to ask for help and that is ok.

Tough Like Mum is a sweet picture book with gorgeous illustrations.

Little Kim looks up to her Mom. Her Mom is tough and deals with mean customers, and Kim gets her toughness from her Mum. They both have hard days, but enjoy coming back together to read stories and hug each other when the days are tough. They're around for each other to lean on.

This is a sweet, little story about dealing with the toughness of life and having family around to help support you. The illustrations are also colourful and adorable, and seem to fit the story very well

Three out of five stars.

Thank you to NetGalley and Penguin Random House Canada for providing me a free copy of this book in exchange of an honest review.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for an e-Arc to read and review.

This is a sweet story of a little girl and her mom. They may not have much, but they have each other. This will be a nice addition to any classroom for highlighting different family structures, being grateful for what you have, and a first look at poverty.

Thank you to the publisher for an advance copy via netgalley!

This is a sweet book. It definitely wasn’t what I expected. The storyline is a bit darker than most stories. However, It teaches kids a crucial lesson that sometimes kids have difficult home situations and that we should try to help and understand. I read it with my five year old and she had lots of questions during the course of the story. She didn’t fully grasp parts of the story, but it enabled me to explain it to her. Once she fully Understood, you could see that it impacted her.

Kim's Mum is tough and so is her daughter Kim. The reader gathers that Kim's Mum works at a restaurant called the Red Rooster from the hanging apron. The book excerpt mentioned that she "deal(s) with unruly customers at the Red Rooster with a snap of her fingers", but it would have been better to include this in the actual story for the reader to understand why she's tough. One is also left to guess that she may be tired from working or maybe she had a bad evening, so she's unable to get out of bed. There are clues that they're struggling financially, such as not having milk or the money for Kim's field trip. Kim also demonstrated that she's tough by putting a brave front at school though she feels different inside. I thought the story was heartfelt, down-to-earth and it showed that life is sometimes a struggle, but the clues were very subtle and the topic was too complex for a little kid. However, it did open a conversation to explain the story. My young son liked the part where Kim shares a soup with her Mum, as it showed compassion and caring. Also, the illustrations were nicely done and colorful. At the end, 'Tough Like Mum' conveys that it's okay to seek help and be vulnerable and that is tough as well.
Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for the pleasure of reading this book, in exchange for my honest review.