Between Perfect and Real is a good book to introduce you to the inner thinking of a trans male. And since the writer is trans, I can only assume the thinkings are correct. For that, I appreciate this book.

It's a good read for high schoolers. Not too deep, but enough where readers can find themselves relating to at least one character in the book.

The first thing the came to mind after finishing this book was calm. Yes, the book has transphobia, bullying, unsupportive parents, being outed, dead naming (the name is never featured on page), dysphoria, and just people being the worst, but somehow, Dean's journey from finding out he's trans to coming out and standing up for himself, was calm. I think this might be because Dean is a very quiet character; his thoughts are loud while his words are shielded, right until he needs to raise his voice to be actually heard. But his emotions are the loudest.

Dean wanted to wait until college to come out but a role of a lifetime fast forwarded it with all the obstacles he shouldn't have faced but sadly are ever present. If you can't deal with your kid being queer, then you are not ready to be a parent. It enraged me, I cheered for Dean, I wanted everything to be okay but of course it wasn't. Well, maybe a bit. Dean has a very supportive best friend, someone to lift you up and to lean on, and I just loved him so much.

This book took me by my hand and guided me through ups and downs, and it gave Dean's voice a strength I admired and wanted to fight alongside it. Dean's story might resonate and help someone who needs a voice they don't know they can use. It was a very beautiful book with a big heart.

I received an advanced copy of Between Perfect and Real through NetGalley so I could share my review with you!

Content Warning: Between Perfect and Real contains scenes and discussions of transphobia, forced outing, bullying, suicide (discussed), homophobia, deadnaming, and gender dysphoria.

When Dean Foster gets cast as Romeo in a high-school production, his entire world begins to shift in ways he’s not sure he’s prepared for. Dean is a trans guy, but he is not out to anyone, not even his girlfriend. While everyone in his life knows Dean as a tomboy lesbian, he knows that isn’t accurate. As Dean becomes more invested in his role as Romeo, he also has to reckon with his own identity, and what being trans means for him.

You can get your copy of Between Perfect and Real on April 27th from Amulet Books!

My favorite element of Between Perfect and Real was the way it explored gender as a journey rather than a single “discovery.” During the story, Dean has to realize that there is no single “right” way to be trans and that his identity must be his alone regardless of what the world might think. My only wish is that the story would’ve had a slightly more conclusive ending, but I recognize that its open-ended nature makes it feel more like real life, which rarely has clear endings. Aside from that one small issue, I really enjoyed Between Perfect and Real, especially its element of theatre when it comes to identity! As someone who was involved in a high school theatre program, I could easily see myself in the world of Between Perfect and Real!

My Recommendation:
If you have been looking for a story featuring a leading trans man, you need to pick up a copy of Between Perfect and Real! This book would be a good choice for fans of stories of self-discovery and exploration of identity.

I really enjoyed this book!!! I adored Dean and his story hit me right in the heart. I can’t say too much without spoilers, but I FELT Dean. Dean’s coming of age was so REAL, I couldn’t help but feel everything he felt. The only thing that I had a hard time with was the amount of acting/theatre that was on-page. And I don’t like Shakespeare, which didn’t help. But I absolutely ADORED seeing Dean grow into himself, finding a support system and just... BE Dean. There were some painful moments, but they didn’t feel like pointless angst. It was a good book and I do recommend it!

Dean Foster is a trans guy, but everyone, including his girlfriend Zoe, thinks he's a lesbian. Then he's cast as an 'untraditional' Romeo in the school play, and he can't keep things to himself any longer.

TW for dysphoria, misgendering, forced outing, transphobia, physical bullying.

I really, really loved this book! I was excited to read a book by a nonbinary author, as a trans person myself, and this book did not disappoint. Between Perfect and Real is a story about coming of age, self realisation, and gender exploration. It captures the emotional rollercoaster of coming out during high school perfectly. It's really emotional. Dean goes through so much in this book, my heart hurts for him. But also, it's so wonderfully positive and hopeful. This book brought tears to my eyes. It's the coming out story that I needed as a teen but didn't have, and it makes me so happy that teenagers now have a story like this to read. Dean's journey to his identity feels similar in some ways to mine, and I love that. There are so many different ways to be trans, and I found Dean's story particularly relatable for me. I hope that young people reading this will feel the same as I did.

I think my favourite scene in the book is where Dean and Ronnie try out pronouns in the cafe. It was such a wonderful, lighthearted moment, so realistic to the trans experience, and so sweet and nice to read.

This book tells a really lovely, really important story and I'm so glad that I got to read it.

"Between Perfect and Real" was a wonderfully emotional read. It follows the story of Dean, a trans male, and his coming out. He plays the lead role of Romeo in Romeo & Juliet and finds his voice through the character.

The story is wonderfully written, diverse in it's cast, and realistic in it's story. It's the type of lgbtq story we need nowadays, something that is real...but hopeful. Stoeve captured the hardships as well as the good parts of any young persons transition. Dean finding a queer found family was by far my favorite thing to read.

I hope Stoeve continues to write because I definitely will be on the lookout for more.

Note: this story does have triggering elements. Talk of suicide, the use of slurs, and transphobia/homophobia. Practice self care before, during, and after reading.

4.5 Stars

CWs: Bullying, transphobia and transphobic violence, harassment, minor outings of a trans person, deadnaming (dead name not mentioned on the page), homophobia and homophobic slurs, mention of suicide, and explorations of dysphoria

"Between Perfect and Real" is a love letter to young trans readers. It's a story that shows a young character coming into his transness—fearing the unknown implications of what that can mean for him, how that might change his relationships, and how that might change how he sees and understands himself. It's a story that explores how we are often kept from our own transness because of fear, and because our minds reject that which they cannot imagine, and we are not taught to imagine ourselves as anything but static, straight, and cis.

As the story progresses, we see Dean gradually discovering these moments of gender euphoria—both on-stage and off. I really enjoy the use of theater and art as a means for exploring gender and identity. It isn't until Dean removes himself and loses himself in the character of Romeo that he's able to see himself no only inhabiting the "role" of a man, but actually being one. Theater is a safe way to move between those roles and hear his fellow actors refer to him as a man, which helps him finally make sense of the puzzle pieces. It also operates as a safe place to explore gender presentation, especially with his costuming, and it allows him to buy his first binder and safely pass it off as a "production expense." I appreciate that the story understands and celebrates the necessity of safe spaces, and theater is just one of those spaces for dean.

There's also a really great emphasis on the importance of found family and community support. This is one of the first YA books I've read that shows a young, questioning trans boy going to support groups with other queer people, having their ideas and insecurities challenged and coming to a place of feeling more confident and safe in their own body and their own experience. Dean also has a really great group of friends (some who are better allies than others). He has people he can trust to go back and forth between pronouns to avoid outing him, people who let him send discrete packages to their house so that he won't get in trouble with his parents, and people who want him to be exactly the person he is. Connection and support is so vital for young trans folks, especially, and I really appreciate that being shown on the page.

At the same time, the story doesn't shy away from hard conversations about how transness can challenge and change interpersonal relationships, and not always for the better. One of the more complex relationships at play here is the romantic relationship Dean has with his girlfriend, who got together with him when he identified as a lesbian. Throughout the story Dean decides he wants to come out to Zoe as a trans guy, and he battles with what that means for their relationship, how his transness might challenge Zoe's identity (if at all), and whether Zoe will be able to see him and love him as the boy he is, or whether she'll only ever see Dean "as a girl" because of his body and because of their shared history. There are times where Zoe makes Dean feel safe and times where she makes him feel unsafe, and that inconsistency is something a lot of trans folks experience. It's not always as simple as flipping a switch from "adjusting" to "acceptance."

That's also reflected in the relationship Dean has with his parents, specifically his mom. She has a hard time accepting his transness and seeing it as "real." This leads to Dean hiding things from his parents and tip-toeing around them, because he can never gauge whether they're going to be receptive or not. To me, not only is that a realistic reflection of what many trans kids face, but it also acknowledges the essential piece that comes from actually being seen, recognized, and respected as the gender you are—not just as "someone masquerading in different clothes." Gradually, Dean is coming to the realization that he will not minimize or erase parts of himself to make other people comfortable, even people who are as important as his parents. He is learning that he doesn't have to be grateful for scraps of decency, and that he deserves so much more.

Dean is a character who's in a really interesting place where he's questioning and exploring how he wants his own transness to look, which I think is important for young readers to see. Does he want to start wearing a binder? Does he want to go on hormones or not? Does he want to change his pronouns? Does he want to officially "come out" or does he just want to live his life for himself? There's no clear-cut right or wrong answer to any of these questions, and I think the story does a beautiful job of showing the validity of all the possibilities. Whatever Dean decides at the end isn't about what will make him "a more real trans person," but rather what is—or could be—best for him.

In the end, I think this story does a great job of showing how transness is merely a world of possibilities, and we all have to learn how to navigate those possibilities in a way that's true for us. It feels scary not because transness itself is scary, but because we are taught to fear transness and because the world continues to reinforces itself as a frightening, unwelcome, and unsafe place for trans people in so many ways. It seems scary because it's a part of ourselves we are not taught to know or recognize, and because we often lack a clear path forward—not because that path doesn't exist, but because we can't see it. I think this story is invaluable in the way it shows Dean confronting those fears, defining what's true for himself, and learning how to navigate his own path on his own terms.

To say that I recommend this book is an understatement, because it is certainly going to save and change lives.

Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for this ARC.

I really enjoyed this book. Stoeve's declaration at the start that they wanted to write a trans journey that was inspired and supported by role models was fully realised. The coming out angle was handled sensitively but didn't take over the plot, and there was still joy in the book. A must-read for anyone seeking to understand how it must feel to be trans.

a book you think everyone should read? this. this is it.

this month, i’ve been lucky enough to read between perfect and real and i just know that it’s going to mean a lot to someone when it is released so thankyou to @netgalley @piquebeyond and @raystoeve for approving me to read this arc!

throughout this novel, we follow our main character, dean, who is a trans boy struggling with gender dysphoria & trying to figure out how to navigate and live life as the boy he is rather than what he has been told. i was so invested in dean and his story from the get go. this was just so heartfelt but heartwarming and it felt like more than just a story. as i am cis-gendered, i can’t express how well done the representation was but i saw a review for this book which stated “i swear this book isn’t fiction, it’s just my own senior year of high school” and i think that says quite a lot.

i personally loved the whole theatre/ acting trope so much, which took me by surprise!
dean is cast as the star of the show, romeo, which is seen as a “non-traditional” move so as well as coming to terms with who he is, we also see him get backlash for being the star of a male role when he isn’t necessarily “seen” as one by others who aren’t as accepting, but seeing him set into the role of romeo and becoming him almost just made my heart go 🥺🥺🥺.

i think this book is an important read for both teens/ young adults and adults too so please pick this one up!!

"She's adjusting. Always adjusting. As if she's the sun and I'm just a planet, revolving around her. But I have my own path."
.Between Perfect and Real is a raw documentation of what it means to explore queer culture and your own identity whilst navigating the trials and tribulations of high school and teenage life. It is heartbreaking and heartwarming and honestly everything I could have hoped for after reading the synopsis. I have no doubt that so many people will see themselves in Dean and gain comfort from him and his experiences that mirror their own, whilst I am not that person - I was reminded of so many of my closest and dearest friends. As an ally you can never learn enough from own voices and this certainly did that whilst still being heartfelt and entertaining. It was a joy to read and one I hope makes its way into school librarys where its impact can be felt the most.
The characters, their interactions and overall reactions were everything I could have hoped for. Each one was flawed in some way, had to learn and grow and process things just like you would in real life and whilst some scenes were definitely upsetting to read about at times there was a definite sense of friendship throughout. Dean really did pave their own way and that's all any of us can hope to do. Overall they felt real, a human quality that is so important in contemporary fiction.
The school setting was also really well done in my opinion, sometimes they can be a bit cliche or cheezy but this felt well thought out and real. Thats really all I can say about most of this book, it just felt so believable which I think drives the important moments, themes and discussions home even more. I loved how the author tied in theatre and the production of Romeo and Juliet into the story, it was so fun to read about and added some much needed joy for both the reader and the protagonist. Such a good fit with the storyline.
The story was relatively simplistic, a coming of age esque tale, but that really isn't something to complain about because at the end of the day we don't have stories like this yet. These experiences haven't been told and they are so desperately needed; there is so much good own voices representation in here (reminder I am Cis so please find Trans reviewers to get more authentic critiques to their experiences). It doesn't matter that the structure was simple as that wasn't its purpose. The characters were centre stage, exactly where they should be. None the less I was so invested and entranced throughout, I couldn't put the book down the story was so addicting. The pacing was spot on and I frankly devoured it.
If you only take one recommendation from me, let it be this one. Support the author and pick this up ASAP, you won't regret it
Rated: 5 Stars

A upcoming release to Add to your TBR’s if you haven’t done so already!
Following the life of Dean who comes to terms and realisation that he is transgender male, oh this was is a emotional ride from start to finish from the relationships he has with his friends and parents,(a tough one with his mother especially as she is not accepting) to the Acceptance he starts to find in this Queer community group he goes to every week and who start to become his chosen family! ughh just reading those parts about Dean meeting them and getting to know their stories!! (Crying)

Dean deals with a lot throughout this book and with trying to figure himself out on top of that he has to deal with school, the school musical with Dean being chosen to play Romeo in Romeo and Juliet (and of course as you can imagine there are some people that have a problem with that🙄) and also like I said before his parents and finally starting to use the pronouns he has always wanted to use but has been scared to.

Stoeve wrote this so beautifully! It was so well written and can tell this book came from a deep and emotional place that you could feel throughout!

As a trans teen, this book would have meant a lot to me. It means a lot to me now! I love that more and more of these stories are starting to come out and cat wait until we see even more in the future.

One of the best trans stories I’ve read! This book takes us on Dean’s journey with empathy and even though it’s a difficult read at times (because of the transphobia from his family and at school), it is mostly an uplifting read. Definitely recommend.

(Review copy from Netgalley)

Between Perfect and Real is a wonderful story about identity, theater, and finding yourself. It's an emotional read, but a hopeful one as well. Dean's story is one that I'm sure will resonate with many readers, whether or not they can directly relate to his self-discovery and coming-out process.

Dean's journey is something that I really want to see more of in books: a character who uses different queer labels over time. Before the story starts, Dean is out as a lesbian. However, over the course of the book, his idea of himself shifts, and he comes out as a trans guy. This kind of change in label is something that happens a lot, but that I don't see much of in books, where figuring out your identity and coming out is often a one-and-done process.

TW: transphobia, misgendering, homophobia, gender dysphoria, mention of suicide, mention of deadnaming, unsafe binding

Plot: Dean Foster knows he’s a trans guy, but no one else does. Being cast in the school play as Romeo he finally feels seen as who he really is, but is he ready to be seen outside of this role?

Characters: Dean- He is such a great character and I honestly wouldn’t change a thing about him. He was successfully written as both a teenager and someone struggling with who they are.

“I’m more comfortable with an extra layer between me and the world.” This quote hit so good.

I’m only going over the main character as we follow his story, there are so many characters and I forgot most of their names. I’m having that a lot with contemporary YA recently. It was good to see Dean interact and and grow within himself when engaging with people who were not accepting of his identity. I don’t know anyone in the LGBTQI+ community who has never had to deal with that and I’m glad this book shows that to teenagers who may have a little more privilege with their identity.

Overview: This book really hurts at times and I had to put it down more than once, but that’s what makes it so well done. This story comes from very real experiences of transgender individuals and I hope trans kids can read this and feel seen. Though this book follows the experiences and emotions of one transgender individual it does hold open arms to those who have different journeys on their identification and how there is no correct way to be transgender.

The issues I did have with it I think was just wanting more, there are a lot of social media references that will not be relevant in 15 years and I wanted to see more theatre, more of Dean in the role of Romeo. More character development from everyone else.

I do not identify as transgender and encourage anyone interested in this book to read from own voices reviewers.

A very sweet, important story. I loved the way the story used theatre as a way for Dean to discover his true self, I think that's why so many people love theatre and it served an excellent narrative function.
I love that YA books about trans boys are on the rise! I think it's very important, and I hope this trend will mean we see some more books on trans girls as well in the future.

i am SO IN LOVE with this book and its characters. the nuance, the realism, the open-endings - it's all so well done and so, so fitting for a journey that has barely just begun. im fully honoured to have read this story and i am beyond grateful to have gotten an ARC.

The book follows Dean who has realised that he is a trans guy - not the lesbian everyone, including his girlfriend think he is. He gets cast as Romeo in the school play as a ‘non traditional’ cast choice, which helps him to realise how he truly feels and how much he wants to come out sooner rather than later.

The book shows bullying, challenges surrounding dysphoria, unsupportive family and friends and coming out in high school which comes with its own challenges.

As a straight girl, I cannot speak for the LGBTQIA+ rep, however since the author is a part of the community, I would hope that this book is not harmfully written.

I really enjoyed this book seeing the theatre aspect alongside Dean finding his true identity and finally feeling comfortable in his skin. It shows who really cares when you are truly yourself which can be very hard to deal with but so powerful to show that you are the most important person in your life.

I do think Dean’s reaction to some people saying it takes time to adjust was unfair. The other character never said they weren’t supportive, they just said it was hard to adjust to using he/him pronouns and referring to Dean as a boy. It also meant that labels would be changed within their relationship, which while I can see that for Dean it may not have been such a big thing as the relationship was the same, for the other person it was obviously a lot to process. It’s one thing if someone is misgendering or using the wrong pronouns constantly, but sharing that it takes time to adjust isn’t meant to be harmful. However, I am not transgender so I can’t fully understand how this situation would affect someone so please don’t take this comment negatively.

This is such an important, beautiful and inspiring ownvoices-story showing that there are many ways to be queer and trans, and how important it is to find your own voice and be your fullest self. Between Perfect and Real is honest and raw, but also so full of hope, and with amazing characters that have completely captured my heart! This heartfelt coming-of-age story about the struggles of a transgender teen boy deserves to be read by everyone!

The story follows high school senior Dean Foster, who knows he’s a trans guy, but to everyone else, including his girlfriend Zoe, is seen as a lesbian girl. But when he gets casted as Romeo in the school play, he realizes that he wants everyone to see him for who he really is. Not just on the stage, but everywhere in his life.

I completely rooted for Dean from the very first second and my heart ached for him through all his struggles and doubts. This story was so real and didn’t shy away from any of the difficulties Dean faced, such as body dysphoria, anxiety, self-doubt, transphobia, bullying and all other highs and lows of coming out as trans and the struggles when not everyone close to you can accept the change. The way Dean’s mother reacted and how she kept dead-naming him made me so angry I wanted to scream out loud at times… But it was nevertheless a hopeful and inspiring story about self-discovery and acceptance, about making it possible to live out your true self and to be loved for who you are.

One of things I loved most about this book was how it showed that there is not just one way to be trans, but that being queer and trans comes with infinite possibilities to find your own voice. I also really loved the beautiful friendships and support from Dean’s friends and his support group. There were so many wonderful characters that I rooted for almost as much as for Dean. Especially his best friend Ronnie completely stole my heart away in the way he unconditionally supported Dean and helped him find a way to express himself via his clothes.

All in all, Between Perfect and Real was an absolutely wonderful and heart-wrenching story with an important message and authentic and relatable characters to root for. I am so glad that Ray Stoeve wrote this book to give more nuances to the narrative about transness and to show that there are so many more ways of being trans and queer. I hope that many readers will feel empowered and seen by this book and the way it shows how no one should have to conform to anyone else’s standards of sexual identity or gender, but that we are all free to be who we are. I highly recommend it and know that Dean and his moving story will stay with me for a very long time!

4.5 heartfelt stars rounding up to 5!

Thank you NetGalley and ABRAMS Kids for the eARC and the possibility to read this wonderful book! All opinions are my own and I am leaving my honest review voluntarily.

🌿BOOK REVIEW🌿

Between Perfect and Real by Ray Stoeve

This novel follows Dean who is a high school student struggling with their identity. Everyone around them thinks Dean is a lesbian, including his girlfriend Zoe. Coming out to his parents and peers at schools was a difficult process as it was and now he has come to terms with the fact he is a trans guy. Dean is cast to play a ’non-traditional’ Romeo in a school production and his teacher allows him to play the role as he sees fit, Dean decides to play Romeo as a boy.

Between Perfect and Real was an extremely powerful book about identity and the pain that can come along with being different. I think the author did an excellent job at portraying how cruel teenagers actually can be… However, he does find comfort in a group that his friend signposts him to that is for trans people. Here he meets other people like himself who offer a huge amount of love and support as they have been through it all before. It also showed the difference it can make when someone has a teacher at school who fights their corner with them, and through the support of his teacher Dean decides to change his pronouns in his bio.

On a darker note, this book does explore how damaging things like dead naming and outing people can be. Dean’s mother really struggled to come to terms with the fact that her child was a lesbian and when Dean reveals that he is trans she flat out rejects this. She continues calling him by his given name and will not accept the fact that he is a boy. There are also some cases of Dean being outed by friends to his other friends, and it highlights how important it is to let someone move at their own speed and to own their own coming out process!

This book gives a lot of food for thought and really emphasises the importance of being open minded, respecting pronouns and encouraging those around you to find their voice!

⚠️CW// transphobia, homophobia, violence, deadnaming