DNF. The writing style was all over the place, Marty was insufferable, and I can't grasp how he could possibly move to the UK on his own without parents realizing that.

As Far As You'll Take Me follows Marty on his journey to leave his judgmental family and even all of America behind. Fresh out of high school Marty flies off to London under false pretenses to try and make it in music overseas. This book is a bit chaotic and hard to get into. This is a bit of a letdown as I was so impressed by Stampers 2020 debut, The Gravity of Us.

This book surprised me. I absolutely loved Marty and his journey. I have to admit it took me awhile to get into this book. I’m not a musician nor do I know my instruments so that was confusing for me. Also I loved the location of London. I loved visiting London so it brought back wonderful memories for me.

Marty was a great guy that needed help and a hug. Traveling to London away from his family took a lot of courage. As a gay teen he wanted to prove to himself and his family he could achieve his goals in playing oboe in London. I felt that Marty needed help with his eating disorder and his anxiety before getting a job that I can only assume would be very stressful. I had a hard time believing that his cousin that was living with him didn’t think to talk to him about this. I did like Marty’s new friends that opened his eyes to new opportunities and a new future. I was very annoyed with Pierce. He was an awful, and selfish person that didn’t deserve Marty’s time nor space. Enough said about that guy. The ending was good and I loved that there was a hopeful future for Marty. He deserved a great future in his new home.

I received this ARC from the publisher and Netgalley for my honest review.

tw: eating disorders, homophobia

Phil Stamper's sophomore novel, As Far As You Take Me, follows a gay teen from the heart of Kentucky on an overseas adventure to England to find his home, and his people. Marty's story is a coming of age, and coming of self, story that I imagine can be related to by many who find themselves being the "outsider" in a religious, conservative area of the US.

It took me some time to be able to write this review as I have two major feelings about this book, and frankly they contradict each other. On one hand, I appreciate Marty's journey and the character development from page one to the very end. Marty has anxiety, he has a hard time making friends and having confidence, and he is really coming from a place of not understanding himself. By the end of the book he learns more about his anxiety, makes a friend group where he truly feels he belongs, and has an understanding of who he is and his place in this world.

On the other hand, as someone who struggles with an eating disorder, reading about Marty's struggles with body image and eating, in the context of a romantic relationship, was incredibly difficult. My concern is not the topic, I never wish for these topics not to be discussed as they are real and valid for everyone. My main concern is *how* it was addressed, and then not addressed. By the end, the eating problems that Marty had throughout the book were just ignored after an initial "intervention" with friends. There was no wrap up to the disordered eating, no lesson Marty learned which normally would occur. I struggled with this part of the story line, as by the end it was unclear how it actually moved the plot along, if there was no lesson involved.

Outside of this concern, which I'm hoping is cleaned up in edits or goes through a sensitivity reader, I did truly enjoy this book and still love Phil's writing. I knew I needed to read his next after loving The Gravity of Us.

**Thank you to Bloomsbury YA and Netgalley for an early copy in exchange for an honest review**

Stamper's novel features a young (just out of High School) man who travels to London to escape his homophobic hometown. At least, he perceives it to be homophobic, ever since the hate crimes and his own botched coming out story. While his parents didn't kick him out of the house, they weren't exactly supportive either, so Marty decides to shut himself down and get out of there as fast as he can. Self-preservation.

In London he starts to explore what it means to be openly out. He develops friendships with more band nerds, learning how to embrace music as a part of everyday. In London, and Europe in general, busking is very common, and a good way to build a portfolio of work. While Marty's anxiety initially holds him back from that open experience, part of learning who he is means pushing himself outside of his comfort zone. Stamper did a good job of portraying the crushing, zoning out feeling that anxiety causes. He writes about it in a way that conveys how overwhelming anxiety can be, and Marty is able to acknowledge and process his anxiety and triggers over time.

Marty is a flawed character, but one that I could connect with. He's in touch enough with his emotions, while still having a ways to go. I appreciated the plot line of how the adults could and couldn't help their kids through different things, depending on how open their kids were about different events. Nobody was perfect in this book, but Stamper continued to show the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships in how everyone communicated with each other.

I received a copy of this book from the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

Phil Stamper's The Gravity of Us was a sweet, fun book. As Far As You'll Take Me is similar, but suffers from a lot of the things that made me dislike the first book.

I did not find the romance to be realistic, but I oddly did enjoy the insta-loveness of it. I think instalove suited The Gravity of Us very much, but less so in regards to this story.

I think that the discussion on religion was phenomenal. I myself am a bisexual girl who has dealt with religious trauma, and some of the lines really hit home.

I think the one issue that exists in both of Stamper's books for me personally that I do not actually think is a huge issue is the fact that a lot of the things that happen feel unrealistic. I think that there should be unrealistic, insane books about queer characters, so I don't think that this is actually a problem, but it means that I don't enjoy it as much.

I will be recommending this to ACTUAL young adults, as I think this is the kind of book I would have benefited from reading in high school.

I received an e-galley of As Far As You’ll Take Me by Phil Stamper from Bloomsbury YA via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

Marty is a seventeen year old boy who has decided to escape his small town in Kentucky in hopes of living out his real and authentic life in London, with the help of his cousin. A year ago, he came out to his parents and were met with less-than-pleased reactions to say the least. Since then - though really starting since his childhood - he’s been longing for nothing for to get away to find a place where he can belong and breath. While he’s finally set out to do this, arriving in a new country with a lack of a plan, and a lot of anxiety can not be easy. With his cousin and a few new friends along the way, Marty will discover new experiences, new friends, new loves, and new hope for his future.

I really enjoyed this coming-of-age novel and I was able to relate to Marty in his overseas experience. I could relate to those anxieties that he had. Reading through his inner monologues, I could really empathize with him as he struggled to find acceptance with his identity. I think that the story goes to show Marty - and readers - that it takes more than just physically moving away to a new country to get a new start. Sometimes the change is really necessary from within - from believing in yourself and your worth - which is something that no place or person can ever do for you really. Aside from all the emotional growth in this story, I also enjoyed the descriptions of the cities that Marty would be in and felt truly transported to Europe. I would love to return to London myself one day and to see London through fresh eyes again, with some of Marty’s perspectives playing on my mind.

Thank you to Bloomsbury YA for the e-galley.

This was such an amazing sophomore novel that I would definitely recommend! This book follows our main character Marty who after some rough experiences coming out he travels to London for the summer. Upon arrival, he meets some friends gets a boyfriend but his anxiety is getting worse and he doesn't feel like he can belong anywhere.

As someone with anxiety, the anxiety representation in here was amazing. I loved how the reader could get a sense of Marty's triggers and how he was feeling while not being triggering to those with anxiety themselves. I thought that the topic of eating disorders was handled respectfully though I cant speak on that myself.

I also loved the topic of toxic relationships and how toxic friendships were as much of a topic as toxic romantic relationships. There were so many things that were discussed in this book that I really appreciated.

I loved the characters and how much I grew to love them, especially Marty, throughout the novel. I think that this is such an important book that everyone should read!

TW: homophobia, fatphobia, eating disorders, anxiety/panic attacks, outing, f slur.

I received an ARC of this book in exchange for an honest review, courtesy of Bloomsbury YA and NetGalley.

I loved this witty coming of age novel about finding yourself and taking the lead in your own life.

Marty isn’t your basic perfectly in shape lead character, he has real body image issues that most people, including me, have, and that is so amazing. I wish there were more books that portray characters with more varied body types.

He’s just such a relatable main character. He struggles with Anxiety and strives to be the best version of himself he can be, no matter how painful it is.

I’m also a fan of how messy the relationships in this book are. In life, no relationship is perfect, they all take effort and not all of them are worth the level of effort you put in. That’s a great message to have in a story, that it’s ok to walk away, friendships aren’t always forever.

I honestly know nothing about the world of music, but I loved this glimpse into the mentality of a musician.

There were too many Harry Potter references in this novel for my taste, yes I get it the story takes place in England but also get JKR out of lgbtq+ novels.

I really enjoyed this book and wish there were more like it.

Music + pride + coming of age + international travel = a permanent smile. Seriously, Stamper’s done it again. I desperately want a movie so I can watch it over and over again on the days I need a pick me up and can’t manage to crack open a book. This entire story is utterly marvelous and takes on big issues (sexuality, toxic relationships, eating disorders, religion...) in incredibly accessible ways. Thank you, Phil. This heartfelt ode to found family and finding yourself is exactly what I needed most.

Seventeen-year-old Marty has a plan: graduate high school early, fly to London, and find a job playing oboe…somehow. He’s looking forward to having the freedom to explore his sexuality without his religious parents frowning upon him, and after only a few weeks, Marty feels like everything is finally falling into place. He’s made some great friends, he gets to travel around Europe, and he’s even getting closer with a guy who just might become a boyfriend soon. But when everything starts falling apart, Marty has to decide who and what really matters to him if he ever wants to find somewhere that truly feels like home.

I have been longing to travel to London for several years, and especially with the pandemic, it hasn’t been possible. However, Phil Stamper’s sophomore novel provided me a wonderful window to explore the streets of London without ever leaving my couch…and what a fantastic exploration it was! Marty is a relatable character with very real flaws and worries. As someone with generalized anxiety, I think that Stamper does an excellent job providing insight into the mind of someone dealing with mental health issues in a way that doesn’t stigmatize them. Marty’s choices throughout, whether we agree with them or not, all feel realistic for a seventeen-year-old boy discovering the freedom to be himself for the first time. Stamper tackles quite a few difficult issues in this book, and he does so with compassion and understanding. Marty’s passion for playing his oboe and the joy the characters bring to playing music together shine through the pages and made me miss my high school band days! With outstanding representation and amazing messages, this book is perfect for those who enjoy contemporary stories about discovering oneself.

(Pine Reads Review would like to thank NetGalley and the publisher for providing us with an ARC in exchange for an honest review. Any quotes are taken from an advanced copy and may be subject to change.)

here's the thing, i was so excited for this book, since i've seen people raving about Stamper's other book. but, this just did not do it for me. i mean, the writing was pretty good, but everything else was kind of boring for me. personally, talking about weight is a huge trigger for me, and i honestly did not expect to be in here as much as it did, but it was still a good book. and i mean, all of his friends in America were shit, along with Pierce since he was so toxic towards Marty and his ex boyfriend.

trigger warnings- bullying, toxic relationships, manipulation, homophobia, religion homophobia, body dysmorphia, eating disorder, self harm by not eating, use of queer slur, public outing with no consent, almost a sexual assault, harry potter mentioned (the author said it is going to be taken out in the actual published edition of this book.)

***thank you so much for an arc of this book! and my review will be posted on the publication date.***

This book is so well written and so well done. Emotionally I feel like any queer person has wanted to figure out a way to run away from it all much like Marty. But also like Marty, things can fall apart quickly and this story of figuring out yourself, your family, and your friends when you aren't sure about your own footing is both haunting and beautiful.

A nice coming-of-age story. I enjoyed the sensitive exploration of themes in the book: religion, independence ..... and just learning to be yourself. A lesson so many of us need to learn in this world!

A young gay musician joins his cousin in London in pursuit of a music career that will enable him to escape from his homophobic Christian parents. A compassionate tale of ambition, found family, and mental health struggles (CW: anxiety, eating disorder).

Honestly, I DNF'd this book fairly early on, I just couldn't get into it. I don't belive it was the books fault just my own personal prefereneces. I'm tired of homophobic parents in YA books. That isn't something I wanna see anymore, I would like to see happy gay kids being happy, which I know isn't the norm, but I like to escape into a better world in my stories. I will say the writing was nice and I did laugh a few times. Also the main charecters anxiety being depicted was very nice to see. I would defenatly be willing to try another book from the author, homophobic parents just triggers me as a reader and I can't keep going.

I won't be posting a negative review on goodreads or my Instagram purely because my negative review is my own personal preferances, and in no way a remark on the quality of the book. Thank you.

As Far as You'll Take Me follows Marty as he lies to his homophobic parents to spend a year in London, and finds love and himself along the way. The book flies by, and I enjoyed the characters, and Marty's struggles are relatable. I also liked the way it explores toxic relationships, an important topic for teenagers to be exposed to. That being said, I don't think the book breaks a ton of new ground, and that limited my enjoyment just a bit. In the end, I enjoyed it and I'm excited to see Stamper continue to grow as a writer.

3.5 Stars

CWs: bullying, toxic relationships, manipulation, homophobia, religious bigotry, graphic descriptions body dysmorphia and disordered eating, self harm in the form of self-starvation, use of queer slurs, public outing without consent, near instance of sexual assault, and several HP references

As Far As You'll Take Me is an incredibly necessary story, but also a challenging one. Much like in his debut, The Gravity of Us, Stamper deftly writes about mental health, and thoughtfully explores the anxiety Marty feels as he leave behind everything and everyone he knows an entire continent away.

This story is much darker than TGOU, and takes an in-depth look at toxic relationships, eating disorders, and homophobia. If you're looking for a light-hearted book that celebrates wanderlust and traversing all across Europe while finding love, this may not be the book for you. (Though it should be noted that Marty does do quite a bit of travelling throughout the story, and it does bring him some joy—and also some pain.) There is definitely a strong element of found family and discovering new friendships that I found to be refreshing, but overall this is a story that definitely puts Marty through the ringer as he embarks on a harrowing journey of self-growth.

(Please do note the content warnings, as these subjects are often explored explicitly.)

Things I Appreciated:

- This book is a music geek's dream! Stamper clearly has incredible music chops, and that authentically comes through in the story. There's a lot of attention paid to musical theory, music technique, and music appreciation that is supremely satisfying to read if you're a musician yourself. (Like me! Former band kid reporting for duty.) It's also really wonderful to see characters connecting and bonding over music. Stamper perfectly captures what it feels like for a group of musicians to play together and challenge each other. It's rare to see such thoughtful portrayals of musicianship, and I loved that aspect.

- Marty is a complex character with a strong voice. He has a distinct point of view, a pretty good sense of humor, and a hunger for acceptance and love. He's also racked with anxiety, and often uses lists to order and organize his thoughts/feelings. He's extremely hard on himself, and often unconsciously finds himself drawn towards strong-minded people who will mirror or echo back all the things he dislikes about himself. Though he definitely Goes Through It in this story, he leaves off in a hopeful place and learns a lot from his mistakes.

- The story honestly and clearly explores the dangers of toxic relationships. This is something I feel is incredibly important for young readers to see, because many young folks will often find themselves trapped in toxic/hurtful relationships without knowing how to navigate them. The story does a good job of showing how Marty doesn't deserve to be punished or hurt just because he's imperfect, no matter how much he may believe otherwise. If a relationship doesn't serve you or build you up, then it's not a relationship worth keeping. I think many young readers will relate to Marty as someone who considers themselves an outsider, or a loner, and who feels like they can't afford to be "picky" in their relationships if they want to be cared about. But our space and our well-being is worth protecting, and I think the story does a good job of showing that.

- The story affords Marty grace. In the beginning, he ignores people's offers to help him, he tries to keep his head down and isolate himself, and he does a lot of harm to himself (both mental and physical) in the process. By the end, he's learning how to be a better friend, how to show up for himself, how to show himself and others the love he deserves, and how to more healthily grow towards the future he wants for himself. Though he faces many challenges, those challenges are valid, and he grows through them.

The Sticking Points:

I want to be clear that even though this is a challenging story, that doesn't mean it's unimportant or that it shouldn't be told. The struggles Marty faces are struggles that many teens, especially queer teens, face. Those stories deserve space and the dignity of being told.

- We don't get to see Marty's parents grow. The homophobia and religious bigotry Marty's parents both participate in and perpetuate is an integral part of this story. One could say his parents are the antagonists of the story, because it's their homophobia that drives Marty out of the States in the first place. Throughout the story, Marty is hiding the truth about his plans to permanently live in London, because if his parents find out before he can secure a long-term plan, it'll be game over.

The acceptance Marty so desperately seeks is, at least in part, because it's exactly what he never got from his own family. As events in the story transpire, his parents do have to confront their own homophobia. But because Marty is separated from them by an entire ocean, we as readers are not able to witness that growth and gauge whether it's genuine or lasting, which feels like a major missed opportunity when it comes to the story's resolution.

- The exploration of eating disorders (and self-harm in the form of disordered eating) felt surface-level. I think the reason why this plot point comes off that way is because it's fleeting. We see Marty slowly but surely developing an eating disorder, but after one intervention/blow-out, the issue slowly fades into the background. Marty is able to confront the problem and address it as being a problem, but there's no mention of recovery or how he plans to go about recovery, and by the end we're expected to just understand that he's "handled" the problem now and it'll never come up again.

This feels disingenuous to those who have struggled with body dysmorphia and eating disorders, both experiences that take an extreme physical/mental toll and take a great amount of support to heal from. There's also a lack of intersectionality, I feel. Or rather, there was a missed opportunity for an exploration of how body image, mental heath, and queerness intersect. Body image is something that a lot of queer folks struggle with, especially considering the prevalence of unrealistically white, cis-centric, Western beauty standards—and with queer men having to contend with toxic masculinity and impossible body expectations, this is a pervasive issue within the community. But that never comes up, and that's never addressed in the story. Marty's boyfriend is simply calorie-obsessed, and his "healthy" habits rub off on Marty in the wrong way.

- There is never an acknowledgement of privilege. I have a lot of admiration for Marty. Getting on a plane with all your most important possessions, flying to a whole other continent with no source of income or living plan, and fully intending to never come back is metal as hell. I don't know many people who could do that. And therein lies the problem, in many ways. While I respect the sheer amount of guts and the level of determination it takes to strike out on your own with no plan and no failsafe, a large part of why Marty is able to take that leap of faith is because he has white male privilege—whether he owns it or not. Even in the worst case scenario (being found out by his parents and sent back home) he has a cushion to fall back on. A lot of people don't.

His ability to afford a ticket to London, to be able to spend what little savings he has on food and European travel, to know that he can stay in his Aunt's flat as long as he needs, to separate himself from his family and comfortably ignore them with little to no ramifications, (view spoiler)—these are all privileges. Even though he experiences a great deal of anxiety over whether he'll be able to secure a living, find a paying gig, figure out a living situation, etc. it's never a question of whether he'll be able to do it. As a cis white man (and an extremely gifted musician, as many people note), his chances of getting a job, securing a flat, making money off a side hustle, are far higher than people who don't have the benefit of those privileges. This is never acknowledged in the story, though it should have been.

It feels like a classic case of "well white can experience hardship, too." Yes, they can, and Marty certainly does. But he can have problems and still benefit from his privilege.

In Conclusion:

So as you can tell, I left this novel feeling torn. I think it's a worthwhile story and one that definitely deserves telling, and it's also a story that's ultimately hopeful and has a lot of valuable things to say about self-growth. Though Marty faces a lot of difficult challenges, I think those challenges are realistic, and ones that many young readers will be able to relate to. For me, it's a story with a lot of really strong ideas that just doesn't quite stick the landing. There was a lot of potential, there was a lot of room to explore these challenging topics with nuance, but I felt like the story just didn't quite get there.

I was still moved by the story and swept up in it. I still loved the writing of it, and I still very much consider Stamper an auto-read author. But I just wasn't able to love this one as much as his debut. Even with all that said, I'm excited to see what Phil Stamper writes next, because I'll definitely be reading it.

Marty is a 17 year old whom was raised in a strict megachurch... and has known he was gay since he was little. He recently came out to his parents the very same day that his cousin did. His cousin’s mother was incredibly supportive, but unfortunately, Marty’s experience was not the same. Marty lived in a constant state of anxiety with everyone’s judgment clouding his mind. So Marty moves to make a huge change. He packs up his things and runs away to London right after graduating high school where he finds his “found family”, some confidence, and an audience that loves hearing him play his oboe.

This is an incredibly important book to read; it provides some insight on the judgments that gay individuals face on a daily basis. Though it has some heavy undertones regarding his family’s reaction to Marty’s coming out, the novel does a great job balancing out these heavy feelings with humor and London wonderment. I adored Marty’s found family and how they slowly showed him how to love himself (while also showing him the types of friends you should let go). I love all the messages this book conveys. The writing made for easy reading, almost read like a journal. I recommend this book.

I did not enjoy The Gravity of Us, but I thought that I would try this author again. However, I did not really enjoy this book as much as I would've liked. Though, I will try again at a different reading mood.