A clear and insightful (if terrifying) book about the various groups of people who just hate women, what fuels them and how they go about expressing this hatred. It was a depressing read, as Laura gives blow after blow of facts and examples of how women have been attacked online and in 'real life' by individuals who attack their victims with misogynistic intentions. They're a real threat, and Laura shows how the groups because they're often white, are iverloooed and not taken seriously. Society prefers to shrug off sexist comments as 'boys being boys' but this complacency has lead to a culture that is incredibly dangerous for women.

Terrifying reading, and if I take anything away from this it's that we must teach our children, especially boys, about respect in equality.

One of the absolute most frustrating, yet informative, books. It’s exhausting & maddening. It’s tough & depressing. BUT… it’s a necessary read & one that’s very well written. Laura Bates completely nails it on the head with this subject. After reading Talia Levin’s “Culture Warlords” last year, I knew I had to add this book to my list, as well. While touching on the same topics, Bates goes into more detail on just how widespread and deeply engrained in our culture misogyny is & why that is. It’s clear Bates conducted a lot of research on the topic and it definitely shows in her writing. Unlike Levin, she took a more academic approach to the topic, which was an interesting juxtaposition.

Men see women’s autonomy as a major threat to them and the power and control they think they (and only they, not women) deserve, which is disgusting, upsetting, oppressive, and pathetic. It needs to be addressed, debated, and just talked about, in general (!!) - way more widely than it currently is & it needs to be done so on a larger stage. As Bates writes, “We can’t tackle a problem if people don’t even know it exists. And once we do know, we all have a responsibility to answer a simple question, which is: ‘What are we going to do about it?’. The shift we need to see IS achievable.” I really do believe everyone - and I mean EVERYONE, especially men! - needs to read this book, because as Bates points out numerous times, this is such an urgent issue in our society and around the world. So read this and then suggest it to all of your friends and family. I truly cannot emphasize that enough.

Thank you to NetGalley and Sourcebooks for providing me with a copy of the e-book in exchange for an honest review.

men who hate women is essential reading for every single person, particularly those of us living in canada, the US, australia, and europe.

this book is a call to action and blueprint for paradigmatic shift. it is an act of lucid, critical resistance.

laura bates writes compelling, urgently. her words, girded with clear-eyed empathy, carry propulsive power. she traces, in specific and lengthy detail, the ways in which real, irrevocable harm is done to people of all genders by the men who hate women.

this book is not excoriating. it is illuminating and galvanizing. it is not comprised of sweeping statements, but precise and razor-sharp, backed by specific statistics, anecdotes, quotes from online articles and firsthand interviews, and a plethora of citations. this book is extensively researched; i would even add that is has been painstakingly, gruellingly researched, given the way bates immersed herself in spaces catered to extreme misogynists.

bates urges us not to underestimate the size, power, influence, and potential for online and offline violence. her arguments draw connections across communities and movements, underscoring the sheer numbers and actively disrupting the myth of the “deranged lone wolf”. the book elucidates the self-contradictory and exploitative rhetoric propelling various groups in the "manosphere", from men's right's activists (reactionary groups actively seeking to undermine feminists and activists at the expense of the very men they claim to champion) to pick-up artists and incels. what's more, bates repeatedly hammers home the point that the manosphere feeds into and feeds off alt-right extremists. in this way, she highlights the crucial ways in which we - media, governments, layfolk - must shift our perceptions, representations, and understanding of the vitriolic manosphere and the men who become radicalized and swept into its on/offline violence.

some social justice books do phenomenal, outstanding jobs of outlining the problems - without providing solutions that are specific, detailed, realistic, and scalable. bates resists this imbalance. her final chapter is comprehensive and grounded in actionable items, their rationale and steps laid clear.

throughout this book, i was blown away by bates' ability to hold empathy *and* accountability for all involved. she eloquently, deliberately sidesteps the inflammatory, superficial, one-sided ranting best exemplified by the communities she writes about. instead, her book expends patience and compassion describing the ways in which these men are not all the same, uplifting the plight of men who suffer harm and deserve support. yet never does she let off the steam on pointing out all the ways in which individuals and groups of the manosphere must be held accountable for the harm they encourage and perpetuate toward women, BIPOC, LGBTQ+ folks, and other men.

i reiterate: everyone needs to read this book.

following the me too movement and Laura Bates book Everyday Sexism I always follow what she releases as i find her direct straight forward voice.

This book was insightful and angering with its truth. I feel like the title is eye-catching, but did not fully encompass what the subject matter entailed. This describes many of the things that we women go through on a daily basis. Some of her undercover work disclosed truly disturbing quotes in this book. As a victim of sexual violence by a man, these types of books are needed, and more people should be reading them.

Really thought provoking and insightful. This is a very well thought out and intelligently written book.

Long book but important read with many topics that are hit. Some aren't talked about enough too! I feel like some of this could have been condensed. Thank you for the advanced copy of this book!

I was given an eArc through NetGalley for this book and went on to by the Kindle edition with Audible narration.

This is my second book by Laura Bates after being introduced to her through a friend who mentioned the Everyday Sexism Project. I have read Everyday Sexism and own Misogination.

This book was significantly more shocking to me than Everyday Sexism was. I don’t know if I’m blind to the manosphere influence or just particularly sheltered I can honestly say I only heard of some of these groups for the first time. I can’t say I enjoyed this book but it was certainly enlightening.

This books is disturbing and unsettling but it's also one all women should read to understand what's going on in our world.
Even if the style of writing is a bit dry once I started reading I felt I had to go on as the topic is very interesting.
Highly recommended.
Many thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for this ARC, all opinions are mine

Depressingly relevant book, and I have a feeling it will continue to be so for a long time. I did find the writing style a bit dry, which surprised me as I haven't had this issue with Bates' other writing, but perhaps that's because she's really delving into some unsavoury characters here. Bates doesn't pretend to have the answers, but she goes further in asking the question 'why do some men despise women' than many journalists and authors have attempted, and I think the result is that we can see the truth of the problem a little better. As for how we fix it - well. That's another book entirely.

Review in the Forward.
https://forward.com/culture/465346/the-dangerous-hate-movement-we-need-to-talk-about-laura-bates-misogyny/

The writing is quite dry and not particularly enjoyable to read, but this is still a vital book and should be taught in schools. A lot of the earlier chapters on incels and MRAs covered details I'm already familiar with (having seen/read analysis of that grim side-alley of the internet several times), but as the book progressed and got steadily darker, horrible new worlds opened up. It's the sort of book that should be read slowly, over a long period of time, rather than all at once, in case the reader gives up on all men entirely. It's very well researched and important, and if you can get past the dry and slightly awkward style it's a valuable read.

Interesting but found it hard to read due to the heavy material and nature of the subject matter. It tended to feel a bit repetitive and akin to reading a text book. While deeply depressing it was a worthwhile read to better understand such an important topic.

THIS BOOK SHOULD BE COMPULSORY READING FOR EVERY ADULT.

I went on an absolute rollercoaster with this book. The words had extra impact, due to the current news stories in the UK. But, even without considering this, the book contains facts and stories and experiences that all women are all too aware of, something that only made the book more heart-breaking.

The book is well researched and is very well put together to ensure that it is discussing a minority of men who engage in the various behaviours covered. Not all men engage in this behaviour, but the men who do are out there, flawed, misguided and even dangerous, and this book is a huge reveal of a culture that many are not aware of. Even those who are aware may not realise the extent that these men make an impact, and how they cross boundaries with so many other dangerous groups, including the far right.

This book is not for the faint hearted, and will definitely take a toll on those who read it. But everyone should read it. It is important to raise awareness of these cultures and beliefs, for our friends, for the future, for our families and for our students.

A harrowing but crucial 5 star success.

I adored, adored Laura Bates’ masterpiece Everyday Sexism, and her latest, Men Who Hate Women: From Incels to Pickup Artists: The Truth about Extreme Misogyny and How It Affects Us All, proves as illuminating. I had heard about the misogynist nightmare that was GamerGate, but there was so much in this book that I didn’t know, particularly how pervasive incel and Men’s Right Activist lingo has become. I began to recognize memes and turns of phrase that I see on Facebook from men who don’t know where their faulty arguments and misconceptions come from. Highly, highly, highly recommended.

Men Who Hate Women was a very unsettling read. I've heard about the incel community and vaguely heard of the manosphere. But to fully learn the extent of how far this world reached was frightening. I suggest that many women read this book. It's extremely informative

** A copy of Men Who Hate Women was provided by the publisher and NetGalley in exchange for an honest review **

This book was very unsettling to read, even as someone who researches gender and sexual violence on a daily basis. It's unsettling because it takes you to various pockets of the Internet to show you just how misogyny and sexism are slowly entrenched in our daily lives. It's scary because these seemingly small pockets aren't that small - they're growing and have been mainstreamed. It's scary because you can see the rage build and how that rage could (and does) so easily manifest itself as outward physical and sexual violence. Bates does an excellent job in building the case that toxic masculinity is at the heart of this, and the only solution is to dismantle the imperialist racist capitalist heteronormative patriarchy!

This is a difficult read as as it was read as an endless stream of figures who aren't nice and figures who were actively hateful towards innocent parties and those who they believed had wronged them. Laura Bates has good writing and I did like her book and how it was formatted as the writing was generally acceptable and she made clear and coherent arguments about the man who are part of the insult community. This is definitely your book you have to be in the right mindset to read as it is a difficult book to process if you aren't mentally strong enough.

Men Who Hate Women by Laura Bates

9781728236247

374Pages
Publisher: Sourcebooks
Release Date: March 2, 2021

Nonfiction (Adult), Racism, Misogyny, Hate Groups, Domestic Violence, Violence Against Women.

WOW! I do not know what to say about this book. It was definitely a hard read but eye-opening. I learned terms and groups I had never heard before. This book made me research the terms and groups mentioned: Incels (Involuntary Celibates), Pickup Artists (PUAs), Men’s Rights Activists, etc. and what I found was scary. These are the chapters in the book.

Chapter 1: Men Who Hate Women
Chapter 2: Men Who Prey on Women
Chapter 3: Men Who Avoid Women
Chapter 4: Men Who Blame Women
Chapter 5: Me Who Hound Women
Chapter 6: Men Who Hurt Women
Chapter 7: Men Who Exploit Other Men
Chapter 8: Men Who Are Afraid of Women
Chapter 9: Men Who Don’t Know They Hate Women
Chapter 10: Men Who Hate Men Who Hate Women

She describes how she created Alex, a young man that joins the Incel forum and becomes part of the group. This is how Laura learns the underworld of misogyny. The author’s research is impeccable. This is a timely book while racism and domestic terrorism is on the rise and the violence against women act has not been passed. Although it is difficult, this is a book everyone one should read.

#NotAllMen they yell whenever a woman shares an encounter with an aggressive admirer, a handsy boss, a leering stranger, a violent rapist, a condescending colleague, an abusive partner. They are right, but there are definitely too many men, and their numbers don’t seem to be decreasing.

In Men Who Hate Women: From Incels to Pickup Artists: The Truth about Extreme Misogyny and How It Affects Us All, journalist Laura Bates investigates the online communities whose ideology centers around having power and control over women, how these affect society, and what can be done to change it moving forward.

Whilst incels (Involuntary celibates) beg for sex on demand, pickup artists (PUA) deploy predatory “gaming” tactics, Men Going Their Own Way (MGTOW) choose to eschew relationships with women altogether, and Men’s Rights Activists (MRA/MRM) insist women return their stolen power, there remains a wide range of common ideas and tactics underpinning what Bates terms ‘manosphere’ communities.

As ‘Alex’, a lonely young man, she allowed herself to be recruited into an online world in which nothing was his fault, in which he was an aggrieved martyr, not the privileged loser he felt society painted him as. And the cause of all his woes? Women. ‘Foids’ that won’t sleep with him, ‘sluts’ who say no when they really mean yes, ‘nags’ who sap their energy, ‘feminazi’s’ who want to rule the world.

While such groups are often dismissed as ‘fringe’ online activities, Bates shows how savvy members of these groups have actively spearheaded campaigns that downplay, distort and discredit women’s issues, amplified by trolls who enjoy the controversy, the irresponsible practices of clickbait mainstream media, and social media algorithms. Bates also explores how the manosphere rhetoric spills into the real world, inspiring everything from wordless intimidation to mass murders, and even influencing politics.

If terrorism is a means of attempting to exert control and wield power by creating fear, then at an individual level, it also describes men who intimidate, harass, coerce and abuse women. Bates is aware that the publication of this book will again make her a target of derision, vile abuse, rape, and death threats, and that her physical safety could be at risk. No one will be surprised to hear it, few will believe that there is anything that can be done about it. As a society, we seem to assume violence against women is inevitable.

#NotAllMen hate women, but some do. Some men blame women for every frustration, every grievance, every loss. Some men see women as objects, undeserving of respect or autonomy. And they are emboldened when these views remain unchallenged. These men are an obvious danger, not only to women, but also to society at large. A significant percentage of those who commit acts of terrorism and mass murderer have a history of violence against women.

I agree with Bates that intervention is needed well before some boys/men wander down this path. We, both women and men, need to be informed, to admit there is a problem, and work together to change it. We need to challenge instances of sexism, and fake ‘news’, to encourage boys and young men to define masculinity in a manner that doesn’t put them in opposition to women. “Ultimately, there are major changes that need to happen across a wide range of sectors, from government to tech companies, from media to education...”

I am the wife of a man who loves me, and whom I love. I am a mother of two daughters, and two sons whom I adore. So I know it’s #NotAllMen, but it is #SomeMen, many of whom I have had the misfortune to encounter in my lifetime. Men Who Hate Women is a book that will disturb, infuriate, challenge, and perhaps change you, for the better.