From an early story of a male doctor questioning whether the author was actually bleeding from her rectum and couldn't it possibly just be her period, I knew that I would be all in on this book (seriously men, I promise we can tell the difference between our rectums and vaginas). Having been diagnosed with Crohn's colitis about a year and a half ago, this book was everything I needed. Part memoir, part how-to manual, part social commentary, Tessa Miller has drafted a book that is a must-read for anyone dealing with a chronic illness and the people who love them. Having had so many experiences as the author (including the already mentioned "are you sure it's not just your period?" from a male doctor), this book really forced me to address a lot of personal feelings on my diagnosis I have been suppressing. Thank you so much to NetGalley and Henry Holt and Co. for the ARC.

Tessa Miller's very honest look at living with a chronic illness is a must read for anyone who has a loved one suffering from any type of chronic illness. Her very raw honesty about the frustrations of getting a proper diagnosis, treatment and trying to live your life in a world that isn't always compassionate or understanding is very real, as anyone who suffers can tell you.
This book was hard to read at times due to the very true descriptions of treatments and hospital visits but so very worth it.
Thank you NetGalley, Henry Holt Company for the opportunity to read this book in exchange for a review.
Tessa Miller, thank you for your honest look at a life that can be hard at times and sharing your bravery.

I found the book a little uneven. I wish it was more of a straight memoir, I didn’t think her parts about the culture and stigma surrounding illness were very strong.

As a Crohn's patient I was especially grateful to Netgalley for sending me this ARC. All opinions represented here are my own and unbiased.

I found this book to be an excellent hybrid of memoir and advice. As a fellow Crohn's sufferer, I found the autobiographical content relatable. Not only that, it was articulate and clear about what we and other chronic illness patients go through - I definitely feel that I could give it to someone close to me and they would end up with a much better understanding of my own experience. It also contains a wealth of information that can be useful to someone newly diagnosed and even to some who have been ill for years.

I can't wait for this book to come out. I want to buy copies for my close friends and family, as well as others I know who are ill. This is a valuable resource as well as a moving tale of bravery in the face of pain and trauma.

What an incredible account of what it means to live life with a chronic illness. Miller leaves out no detail when describing what she endures as someone with Crohn’s disease. The details, while very hard to read, are so important to help others understand what living with Crohn’s means. It isn’t pretty. It is messy, painful and utterly exhausting.

I read this book to gain better insight on what it is like living day in and day out with Crohn’s. I learned so much. Miller went into detail about how to navigate the healthcare system; from how to select good doctors to dealing with difficult insurance companies, her experiences laid bare in the hopes that what she can help someone else avoid the struggles she had to go through.

Much of the book is hopeful and focuses on how important it is to find a community of other folks dealing with chronic illness, either online or in person.

Beautifully written, thought-provoking, and just generally one of the most absorbing reads I've encountered in months.

Without warning, Tessa Miller's life changed forever. It started with a stomach cramp, then days of horrible pain and hours spent in the bathroom, and finally hospitalization. From there, it's a journey of tests, procedures, misdiagnoses, incompetent and condescending doctors, and the uncertainty that things will ever improve. After being diagnosed with Crohn's disease, Tessa is forced to confront the idea that her life will never be the same and figure out how to accept her chronic illness.

Tessa's honesty about her condition makes this book a must-read - she gives an unflinching and raw account of her experience with the disease, including multiple bouts with C. difficile, a notoriously terrible infection. She tells it like it is - the good and the bad - and I could not put the book down. You can tell she is a great journalist and storyteller.

I also appreciated Tessa's emphasis on the mental health changes that come with chronic disease. But despite the darkness of her story, she adds plenty of light to the narrative. We see how her illness has helped her say no to the things she doesn't value, to live her life on her own terms, and to find joy in the good days. And she's not alone - the book contains quotations from lots of people in the chronic disease community about their gratitude in daily life.

If you suffer from chronic illness, this book has a lot of useful advice on how to deal with your job, your insurance, your doctors, and your family and loved ones. As a family member and friend to multiple people with chronic illnesses, I highly recommend this book to others looking to better understand the life-changing nature of chronic illness.

Thank you to Henry Holt & Co. for providing an ARC on NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

Thank you to NetGalley for providing me with an advanced copy in exchange for a honest review.

<b>Trigger Warning:</b> If you have experienced any rough days in the hospital be warned that some chapters will be especially difficult to finish. For me this was chapter 8. The book contains some graphic descriptions of difficult procedures from the author's perspective.

Despite its often grim subject matter, Miller manages to keep a good sense of humor throughout the book and weave in enough wisdom to make this a must-read. This eye-opening memoir is an important read for those living with chronic illness. It will also help those not living with chronic illnesses to understand better the life of those who do. The sections on maintaining mental health are universally important reminders. All of us will have to deal with grief, anxiety, or guilt at some point.

I found myself hooked on reading about Miller's journey. The book provides tips for being the best friend for your friends living with chronic illness including how to be supportive and what to say. Simply telling your friend with Chron's that you read this book to learn about their experience will be very powerful. The last few chapters are important reminders for the role that gratitude can play in your life. The last chapter combines quotes from Miller's friends with chronic illness explaining the joy they find in life as a collective it gets better message.

Review posted on Goodreads, Link below

This memoir was painful and beautiful all at once. I can't imagine how hard that must have been to be in so much pain while suffering through misdiagnosis after misdiagnosis. Miller tells her story with grace and strength, and I think it would be cathartic for others with chronic illnesses.

The author shares with us her life her living with a chronic illness.Anyone who suffers illness on a daily basis will relate,Living coping with the pain while negotiating your everyday reality,A brave book by a brave journalist.Highly recommend, #netgalley #hebryholt

I thought it was fitting to close out one of the crappiest years on record with a memoir that tackles crap, literally and figuratively. Before I read Miller's book, I had a basic understanding of Crohn's Disease. Reading about her experiences left me aghast. She has been through the wringer and back. I learned about fecal transplants and a stool bank (now I have heard everything). Not just a memoir, but she shares tips on surviving a chronic illness from many different angles. I have much empathy for the author and her suffering. She did have a tendency to pontificate quite a bit about healthcare and other issues, which I skimmed over. Overall, it's an enlightening read.

As someone with chronic illness as well as a nurse, I was fascinated with this read. Tessa does a great job explaining the daily trials and what it means to live with something that no one else can see. I think this should be recommended reading for anyone in healthcare or who cares about someone with an invisible disease. The author gives numerous resources for people with chronic illness to get the support and services they need. A humbling, tragic, and well-written book.

Thank you to NetGalley for providing me with an advanced copy in exchange for a honest review.

<b>Trigger/Content Warnings</b>: Graphic depiction of bodily functions, medical trauma, medical PTSD, sexual assault, detailed hospital visits
<b>Book Length</b>:
<b>Chapter Length</b>: ~15-20 pages; there are endnotes with the research citations at the end of each chapter.

This book is brutally honest in its portrayal of chronic illness. Tessa Miller makes you feel her pain, physical and emotional, along with her. The pages are filled with her own experience with Crohn's mixed with social and political commentary on how fucked up it is to be sick in the United States. And if you didn't understand that before, she provides drug prices without insurance to make the point hit harder (I honestly loved that bit). Ultimately, if you don't get how much chronically ill and disabled people are shit on in the U.S., then you never will.

There were moments were I wanted to hug Miller. I felt such a kinship when she had complicated feelings surrounding her relationships with her family. I wanted to cry for her with each C.dif diagnosis, fully knowing it was just another thing to add to an already tired body. It's rough to read such a story when you know the psychological effects yet another diagnosis adds.

At the end of the book, I felt like Miller was working on healing herself. It wasn't preachy or "live laugh love"; I don't think anyone with chronic illness can find healing with such platitudes. Instead, it was filled with reality, honesty, and scientific backing which we love to read when dealing with long-term illness.

On a personal level I can relate to this book. I highly recommend reading this book. Thank you to NetGalley for allowing me to read this book.

This was like reading my diary of when I was diagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis- so, so we’ll written - anyone can feel like they’re with the author and going through all of the issues, questions, ups and downs!

"What Doesn't Kill You" is a fiercely honest and brilliantly researched memoir detailing journalist Tessa Miller's body, mind, and heart-wrenching experience being diagnosed with a Crohn's disease in her early 20s while living in New York City. I have been a fan of Miller's writing for many years and looked forward to reading her first book, which did not disappoint.

This is an essential read for anyone who is dealing with a chronic illness themselves or has a loved one who has been diagnosed, because, as Miller explains, "There's very little public dialogue about chronic illness—we're brought up to believe sickness either goes away or kills you. But what about the space in between, where it does neither? Six in ten Americans exist within that space, living with at least one chronic condition, yet it's rarely talked about outside of a doctor's office or hush-hush support groups."

As with all well-written memoirs, I think "What Doesn't Kill You" will also be enjoyable for readers not affected by chronic illness. Miller uses her experience to explain how she learned (and is still learning) to manage things that affect nearly all humans, healthy or otherwise, including work/life boundaries, independence, anger, anxiety, stress, control, self-blame, body-image, and complicated interpersonal relationships.

Miller's writing is sharp and vividly descriptive. She is able to weaves deeply personal stories from her life seamlessly with her medical journey. Being a journalist, I was not surprised that Miller includes a substantial amount of research (with footnotes and appendix) and interviews covering essential topics related to chronic illness management and care—the convoluted American health care system, mental health assistance, patient advocacy, support groups.

Though full of harrowing details that are sometimes difficult to read, or even imagine, Miller’s book is also full of hope and gratitude, the deepest kind that comes from having something completely upend your body, mind, and soul. She beautifully shares, “Illness and infection brought me close to death more than once, but each time I returned with one devastating thought: I want to live. Not just that, I want to notice when and how I’m alive. I’m still learning many of the lessons in this book, some of which will take an entire life’s work to grasp. What mattes to me is no perfection but practice. I’m proud that I haven’t let incurable illness coarsen my heart to the good things this world has to offer—instead it opened me up to kindness, humor and connection.”

I highly recommend Tessa Miller's first book for fans of "Brain on Fire: My Month of Madness" by Susannah Cahalan, "Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail" by Cheryl Strayed, and "The Rules Do Not Apply" by Ariel Levy.

I received a copy of this book through NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

This is such a powerful read!

Miller shares her own experience with chronic illness while sharing information on the American healthcare system, finding a good therapist, and ways to support your friends who experience chronic illness. She alternates sharing her life regarding her diagnoses, her dating life, and how much her life changed over time as well as helpful information on everything from sex with a chronic illness to how a racist and fatphobic medical system underserves so many people.

Miller is open and vulnerable talking about how poor her care was at times and how awful she felt physically and mentally. She dives into the difficulties of having a failing body and how isolating fear can be. She's also very honest about her relationship with her mother, how that impacted her recovery, and he relationship with her at the time boyfriend.

It's such a heartfelt and compelling read! For those experiencing chronic illness, especially at a young age, it's a reminder that you're not alone with tips on finding good mental health supports. For those who want to support friends and improve the American healthcare system this book offers examples.

It's both a harrowing and beautiful read.

Wow finally a book about chronic illness that is an enjoyable read. Even thought I can’t relate with the author on her diagnosis, I can relate with chronic pain and undiagnosed illness.
Her book gives you so many resources and also takes you through her journey to getting diagnosed, which of course doctors passed off as something minor until she kept fighting and searching for the right doctors.
She touches on healthcare in the United States, how doctors will write you off if you’re overweight etc, and also touches on COVID since she wrote this book during this pandemic.
Even if you don’t suffer from a chronic illness or know anyone who does, I still find this book to be informative as well as a good memoir.

An important book about the way the medical establishment treats--or doesn't treat--women's pain and suffering. A must read.

A heartbreaking firsthand account of living with chronic illness. Tessa Miller had gastrointestinal pain and uncontrollable diahrrea for years before receiving any medical care that addressed her symptoms. Amidst the pain and suffering was the lack of attention and gaslighting from the medical doctors, hospitals, personnel, and insurance companies who refused to follow up and provide adequate care. It was several years into the painful struggle before she was definitively diagnosed, and even then was not allowed to access appropriate treatment.

Her own persistence, along with the support of family and a boyfriend (with whom she already had fraught relationships) is what brought her to being able to sustain her own life. Another intense account that only highlights own own country's failure to provide medical treatment for all our citizens.