Cover Image: The People Pleaser's Guide to Loving Others without Losing Yourself

The People Pleaser's Guide to Loving Others without Losing Yourself

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Member Reviews

The People Pleasers Guide

This book was a bit of a surprise. I didn’t realise  there were religious parts in it. 
Not that it would have bothered me as such. But, maybe I wouldn’t have read it as I would have assumed it would have been ‘preachy’ or just revolved around that. 
However, it doesn’t preach and just revolve around religion. 

This book is wonderful. It gets you to reflect on:
Are you a people pleaser? 
What kind of people pleaser you are. 
Why are you a people pleaser?
What you can do about it. 

There are exercises for you to complete. Which really draw out your individual need. 

Would recommend!
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For those of us who are people pleasers, this is a great book full of ideas, suggestions, and stories to help navigate the cycle of people pleasing, As I turned each page, I kept saying, “yep, this is me,” and it helped me to become more self-aware of the tendencies and traps I fall into.  Well-recommended.
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As a recovering people pleaser, I appreciated the practical wisdom in this book. When you want to recover from people pleasing, you may find the wrong information that leads you more toward self-love than honoring God and others. This book points you in the healthiest possible direction, with down-to-earth advice and encouraging stories.

I received a preview copy of The People Pleaser’s Guide from the publisher.
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As an atheist I was somewhat dreading a sermon after the other reviews mentioning God and Jesus.  However, it’s a pretty solid book full of good advice for anyone lacking confidence, feeling lost in the community, or pulled in too many directions.  The Christian chapter is small and actually possibly relevant to believers; and quite rightly the author says he had to include it to be true to himself.
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This book contains alot of good advice to be followed. Don't change and slip back into your old ways. Keep striving daily to be more like Jesus.
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Loved this book! I was fortunate to have an advanced copy of the book and let me tell you it was so good. As a recovering People pleaser, this book is full of wisdom and help. I was immediately drawn into the book and had so many moments of identifying and then clarity. A great book!
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This isn’t your typical stop trying to please everyone book. This is a great tool to learn how to use a gift God has given you in ways that are beneficial and not exhausting.  This book a full of Practical application and I will be recommending it to clients who struggle in this area. I really appreciate the approach this author has taken with people pleasers.
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#The People Pleaser's Guide to Loving  Others Without Losing Yourself#  is  written by  Dr. Mike Bechtle.   Dr. Bechtle  has  written  other books  like People Can't Drive you  Crazy if you  Do  Not Give Them the Keys,  I  Wish He  had Come with Instructions  The Women's Guide to a Man's Brain.   This  book is  written to help people  understand  why they   people please  and what   people pleasing does to  your life and relationships with others. He   addresses the   blocks to communication and  what is needed to  change  from these  ways of relating to others.   The author  shares how He  people pleases with others.  The book is personable and well written.  This book  was given to me to read and review.    It is a helpful tool  for counselors , pastors .   Thank you to the author, publisher  and netgalley for allowing me to read and review this book.
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I found this book fascinating. There were so many examples of who I was, am, and where I'm heading in my interactions with other people. While reading, I could really relate to what Mike Bechtle was sharing from his own experiences. To some degree, we all want others to like us and to please them in certain ways. I realized that how I was communicating and the ways I perceived others' reactions to me were areas I want to really work on. We all have strengths and areas to improve on, and I believe he really hits home for people of all walks of life, ages, and roles we play in our interactions with others. This book is a wonderful guide for anyone who cares about people while wanting to maintain a realness to who they are as individuals. I highly recommend this book which not only allows for self-introspection but to understand the viewpoints of others with whom we come in contact.
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I wish I had this book years ago. It's so hard for me to say No when people want me to do something for them. This book is full of helpful information and reminds you that there is no such thing as a conflict free relationship.
What stayed with me was to ask myself if I really want to do what I'm asked and to say no if it's not.
This is a very helpful book that I highly recommend to everyone. Thank you Dr. Mike Bechtle and Baker Publishing Group-Revell via NetGalley for the complimentary copy of this book. All opinions expressed are my own.
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Out of all the books I’ve read lately, I took the most notes during this one. I am a People pleaser. I know it, I admit it and just can’t help it. I’ve tried. Believe me, I have tried! My New Years resolution for year is to “say no” and last year I added “without feeling guilty” to it because I feel bad when I can’t help someone or let them down. Need someone to volunteer, “ask Brandi she will do it” has been muttered so many times! And I do and do and do even when I don’t have the capacity. Don’t even ask me how many volunteer roles I have now (on top of being a mom and wife and having a full time and part time job). The part time was one of those “don’t want to let someone down” things so I took it and can’t quit because I’ll let them down.

Anyway, now you know me, let me tell you about the book! You don’t have to lose your self to please others! Read that again. Now let it set in.

Mike Bechtle reminds us to ask ourselves “Do I really want to do this, or do I want people to see me doing it?” How convicting is that? The first step is to recognize you are a people please and there is a quiz in the book to let you know your level, I took the quiz and scored top of the charts! Which isn’t always a good thing.

The next thing that stuck out to me is “there are no conflict-free relationships” so I’m working on being okay with that.

What helps the most is that there are so many practical things and building blocks to help get me where I want to be and remind me I don’t have to do it alone.

I received this as an advance copy from the publisher but this is my honest opinion and while it is my first book by Mike Bechtle but won’t be my last!
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The  title of this book is what caught my attention. As a woman this is something very familiar to me, because we as women, have a tendency to loose ourselves in tending to family, careers, friends & community. But it’s not just women who are people pleaser. Men fall into this trap too. In this book, all people will find familiar (people pleasing) parts of themselves.  Dr. Bechtle does a very good job in giving reasons as to why and the solutions how to end it, without taking away from loving others. Through chapter after chapter, he brings insight on how this people pleasing gets started. How it influences thoughts and behaviors. To ways of pleasing people without losing oneself.
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