Cover Image: Where the Light Fell

Where the Light Fell

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My wife turned me on to Philip Yancey’s books about 20 years ago. His writings of grace and the pain suffered have many times been a comfort to me. I wouldn’t have thought that Yancey could be more transparent and vulnerable, but this book proves me wrong.

It’s amazing to me that he persisted in his faith even after years of emotional and spiritual abuse from the church and many times from his own mother. As a counselor I have seen many more who have similar experiences go the way of his brother Marshall or give into cognitive dissonance because there doesn’t seem to be another way to make sense of things because those in authority claim to be hearing directly from God.

I have a greater appreciation for him and his prior work and will be revisiting some, while discovering others.

Thanks to NetGalley and Convergent Books for an ARC of this book.

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Apparently the author is well known in the Christian writing world, not reading these books hje was an unknown to me. I must say I enjoyed this book immensely. I find memoirs are pretty much hit-or-miss but this one was definitely a hit. Having grown up in the 50s as the author did, I enjoyed the many cultural references and found his memory similar to mine. To survive such a harsh religious childhood and end up choosing religion as your life's work is truly remarkable. I highly recommend the book!

Thank you to NetGalley and Convergent Books for providing me with an ebook to read and review.

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This memoir was so good that I read it in two settings. I was familiar with the author and some of his books. I had no idea of his childhood struggles and the abuse he endured with his mentally ill mother and his fundamentalist religion.

I could relate to some of the pressure he endured as I grew up in a fundy church myself. There were catch phrases, code words and separation from the rest of the world.

Yancey struggled so much to try to understand his world and try to find a place where he fit in. His mother had promised the Lord that both her sons would be missionaries. She was very cold hearted to them and this was because of her own upbringing of course. Yancey shares some of the story of his mother's sick family as well.

I highly recommend this book whether you are religious or not. It could be used in social work and therapy classes as well.
Thanks to Net Galley for providing me with this wonderful ARC in exchange for an honest review.

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This book is a memoir of Philip Yancey's life. It is a book about dysfunctional families and relationships between a mother and son, between brothers, and between a person and God. It is a book of searching for a faith in God despite what the world, Church, and others showed Philip. What is true of God? Why do we live a life contrary to the ways of Jesus? Why do other Christians appear hypocritical, teaching and living lives contrary to the ways of Jesus? Philip wrestles with these questions throughout his life growing up,  living during the civil rights movement, in college, and afterwards. He struggles with his relationship with his Mother and brother all the while trying to make sense of God. The main part of the book flowed well but I didn't get some of the quotes between chapters or what was their purpose/correlation to the book.  This was the first book I read about Philip Yancey but am curious to read more of his books as I too struggle or doubt God especially when Churches/Christian lives don't go along with the teachings of the Bible.  A theme of the memoir is that we have choices throughout our lives. We can choose to turn to God or away from Him in our suffering. Another major theme of the book is Grace- God's Grace toward us and our Grace toward others. Philip finds this grace as he journeys through life and learns to show grace to others- especially his mother and brother. This book gave me some fresh insight into relationships, suffering and faith, and Christian living. I would recommend this book for anyone struggling with their faith, relationships, or just looking for a good book to read. I received an advanced copy of this book for my honest review. All opinions expressed in this review are my own.

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I grew up in an evangelical household and experienced the judgmental religion that goes with it. Somewhere along the way someone reminded me that God has no grandchildren; we are all children of God, a spiritual journey we need to work out for ourselves.

My youth group went through a spell of curse word correction, that is to say saying “oh crumb” to express frustration was a substitute for “oh Christ” and therefore taking the Lord’s name in vein. That was a silly game, nothing like the anger and rage in Yancey’s home. I realized in his closing comments that perhaps his mother’s rage was actually guilt from her decision to move her husband from the polio hospital, expecting a healing that didn’t come. Something caused her anguish in those nights that Yancey heard her crying.

I’ve read several of Yancey’s books in the past and have to agree that this book is a prequel. I would never have through that his growing up years were such a minefield. My heart goes out to Marshall, so talented and sincere and so under assault by the person who should have had his back, his mother. Recommended.

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I read several books by Philip Yancey over the years but this one, Where the Light Fell, is completely different as it is about his personal life. He doesn't hold back and talks about his life beginning with his childhood. He talks about the good and bad. Very interesting insight to his life. Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for an ARC.

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Where the Light Fell is a deep dive into Philip Yancey's childhood and life, including the positives and the negatives. The restrictive upbringing in a fundamentalist single parent household sets the stage for the resultant trauma and psychological scars. The look behind the curtain of this strict religion adds much to this story. Yancey tries to present explanations for his and other’s behaviours while trying to come to terms with the aftermath. This book was provided to me in the hopes I would read and review it. #NetGalley #WheretheLightFell

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“Where the Light Fell” is Philip Yancey’s long-awaited, stunning, self-revelatory memoir, a deeply personal, extremely arresting and heart-gripping book, painfully honest, raw, transparent and vulnerable. It is a story of unimaginable pain and divine redemption, of lives shattered to smithereens, yet beautifully healed by God’s redeeming grace. Yancey’s inspiring ministry of grace-filled empathy was born from the wounds he sustained in early childhood. His gifts were shaped by scars to give him stars in God’s firmament. Yancey reveals the sordid details of his impoverished upbringing and his heart-wrenching discovery of a tragic family secret, revealed to the whole world but hidden from himself and his brother. This set him on a persistent quest to uncover the truth. In his most personal book yet, he examines the very nature of love and how love still finds us against all odds. Although remnants from Yancey’s childhood, in the modern form of racial hostility, political division and culture wars, have resurfaced in today’s social and political divides, at its very heart and core, this is a book about finding solace and healing in God’s loving arms. No pain and loss is ever wasted in God’s divine plan for our lives. In Yancey’s childhood and growth into adulthood, “Where the Light Fell” illuminated the darkness and chased away the shadows, making him into the person God intended him to be. In his searing, heart-rending memoir, Philip Yancey finally reveals his relentless quest to identify true faith. He learned the priceless value and true worth of grace because it was denied to him. He discovered that to find true peace is to ask God for the seemingly impossible: a Christ-like love, the God-given power to forgive, and joyful hope to face life head-on, confident that God who is with us today, will be with us tomorrow. In the final outcome, Yancey’s hard-won spiritual awakening is miraculously given by God, who loves him as the apple of His eye. Yancey’s life story is a deep exhale of a heart’s passionate cry for relief from trauma, inflicted by the people around him, with nobody to shield him from things a child should never see. Yancey certainly experienced some of the worst and some of the best, yet remained intact through it all. Here was God’s protection at its very best. Although Yancey wrote so much about pain and suffering, hardly anyone knows about the story of his childhood, which he finally shares openheartedly, truth be told to the world. This book is a well crafted memoir, with characters one identifies with, hardships to be sorrowed over, triumphs to be rejoiced about, a soul-stirring, heart-moving commentary on America – after World War II. “Where the Light Fell” strikes a profoundly deep and very personal chord in one’s heart. I highly recommend it to all avid readers who wish to know how Philip Yancey grew out of his turbulent childhood into the graceful servant of God he is today.

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Reading gives perspectives and helps build compassion in people that stems from empathy and understanding. The experiences in this memoir is totally alien to me, yet that is precisely what intrigues me because it helps me to understand why cult-like fundamentalists behave in a certain way. Memoirs like this that shed light on the culture and beliefs of fringe communities are educational in their own right and I appreciate the human behind it and his telling of his journey to transcendence.

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I've been a fan of Philip Yancey's writings since the first book I had the privilege to read. Yancey consistently extends a solid foundation of research and information while providing a challenge of action. He forms understandable yet deep concepts easily accessible to readers. Throughout his books, Yancey has given glimpses of his life into the message and now the rest of the story. We had no idea the depth of his suffering as a child and into adult years. There are many memories that are uncomfortable and difficult to read yet give insight into this intelligent communicator. It's shockingly amazing that, after tragic and painful events, he chose grace, forgiveness and faith. Many have or would have turned away from Christianity, wrongly and staunchly portrayed by modern day Pharisees of duplicitous fundamentalism. The journey and ultimate event that changed Yancey is presented in a brave, unpolished narrative and gives greater depth to my personal favorite: What's So Amazing about Grace? One answer to that question is the anthology and life choices of Yancey himself. Grace immerses the man, and he also extends it to the very people who did the most harm. He writes that they are the ones who need it most.

I received a complimentary copy of the book without obligation. This review is my opinion.

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Yancey has an important story to tell, but much of it gets lost it a barrage of anecdotes and side stories that slow (or stop) his narrative. The book begins to take off when he hits high school and college and can articulate his struggles, adding perspective and analysis on a life that suffocates him with its religious fervor, and a mother more committed to God than her sons .The beginning, however. is a series of stories with too little connection to a narrative arc and no energy to advance the story, so it was seriously slow going. I ended up scanning much of it—I was interested enough to keep reading, but without much enthusiasm and with little interest in the details.

I know families like the Yanceys and I would like to know them better. I had hoped this book would have given clarity on their lives. It offered glimpses of truth, but it never came together for me.

I thank Net Galley for an advance copy in return for an honest review.

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I was fortunate to have received an early copy of Where The Light Fell by Philip Yancey through NetGallery. Although I have enjoyed reading books of a spiritual nature, I tend to be skeptical of those written by what I perceive to be popular evangelicals. But something drew me to this book…. maybe because it was apparent that he had grown up in Atlanta, a place I lived for many years, so I have somewhat of an understanding of the religious “geography” of the place. Or maybe it was knowing that others I respect have recommended his books. As I started reading I realized a key moment was seeing his father in an iron lung, and though I was reading this during the pandemic, I hadn’t realized that the limb-crippling polio disease had also been one that affected respiration, even though I am old enough to remember seeing an unused iron lung stored at the post office when I was growing up. But back to Yancey’s memoir. I would recommend it to other skeptics like myself. His story of growing up with a mother whose faith bordered on fanaticism, to the detriment of the health of her sons, was compelling. His faith journey had many dangerous “bumps” but he came out OK, able to maintain a relationship with his family and find his own calling to a ministry that took advantage of his compassion, humility, and considerable talent for writing. I may even find myself reading some of his other books!

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I have read Yancey's books off and on for the last several years and appreciate his insight into the Christian life. I was excited to read this memoir and it did not disappoint. Yancey is a good writer who knows the importance of a story to illustrate a point. He delves deep here into his own past and gives details about himself and his family that are not flattering, showing such a level of pain! I was glad to hear how he came to finally give his life to Christ and the peace this gave him. In some sense this was not only a memoir of Phillip, but of his brother Marshall as well. Marshall's story was not as uplifting as Phillip's was, but it was told with compassion and love. their mother does not come off too well, but Yancey does take pains to try to explain her behavior and give her credit where it is due. Whether you are a fan of Yancey's books or not, this is definitely a good book to read.

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Thank you to publisher for the chance to read this memoir. It was good. I have not heard of author before and I’m sure it would have been a little better for me if I had but it was still good:

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I'm not quite sure how I feel about Philip Yancey's new book, Where the Light Fell. I've read several of his titles and admired him for his ability to question matters of faith while staying faithful. I've identified more with his transparency and honesty than with other authors who rarely express any doubt or uncertainty.

This book, which is a memoir of his life, taps into many of my own experiences growing up in the deep South in a particular era. I understand where he came from, although I was not raised by a parent with extreme religious beliefs and a cold, distant personality.

My issue is with his account of the moment when his faith stopped wavering and crystallized. I know from his books that he still questions and considers matters of faith carefully, but the incident he recounts feels like a transformative spiritual awakening based on emotions rather than the logical and ration reasoning he had relied on up to that time--and still does, to some extent.

I believe he sincerely wants to comfort and encourage those who have felt wronged by the church or its members. But he admits spending years pretending to believe, in order to fit in with his family, school, and community, and I was left a little shaken by what seemed to be such a sudden turnaround.

Yancey's readers will find much to appreciate in this book, in my opinion, and may come away with a better understanding of what shaped his faith.

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I've read many books by Philip Yancey, and he is an excellent writer. This one also did not disappoint, but it is a little different. It's Yancey's personal memoir of his childhood, youth, and how he came to faith, and after reading it you will understand why so much of his writing is focused on the themes of suffering, pain and grace.

Philip and his brother were raised by their mother after their father died of polio. His parents had hoped to be missionaries, and his mother remained devout. She told her sons that she had "dedicated" them to God, just as Hannah in the Bible gave her child Samuel to the Lord. She wanted them to become missionaries, fulfilling the desire she had been unable to accomplish in her own life. As a consequence, when they failed to measure up to her expectations, she was disappointed and behaved in ways that left them feeling angry and rejected.

Although Philip attended a Bible college, he saw himself as a rebel and outsider. He could not embrace his mother's extremely legalistic approach to God, and comes close to rejecting Christianity altogether. However, eventually, he has his own conversion experience and comes to know Christ in a whole new way. Even as he rejects his mother's viewpoint, he tries to understand, forgive, and encourage her to reconcile with his brother.

The Lutheran Ladies blog received a free e-copy of this book in return for a fair and honest review.

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I don't read Christian books and had never heard of Yancey before reading this book, so I read it purely as a memoir. As a memoir, it didn't work for me, and I should have thrown in the towel on this one but kept thinking it was going to get better. While some aspects of Yancey's fundamentalist upbringing and the mental illness in his family were interesting, I didn't find Yancey well suited as a memoirist. He constantly changes and manipulates who is as he grows up, typically not in a manner to get to know himself or improve himself, but often to gain something from others or in order to paint himself in a certain light. As such, he writes the memoir more like a biography as there is almost always a remove from his own experiences. While I admire his willingness to share his flaws and mistakes, I rarely felt his guilt or remorse, either. There are a few heinous acts of animal abuse that will make many readers squeamish, and also terrible examples of racism and hurt inflicted on others (not always at Yancey's hands). While readers of his Christian books may be interested in the "prequel" to those days, I don't recommend this as a free-standing memoir.

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This is an excellent memoir by the author, detailing his life - mostly childhood - without a father and with a mother who had mental issues. Yancey doesn't pull any punches here as he describes a legalistic church background filled with racism and a mother who showed one face to the world and another at home.

It's disheartening to read what he and his brother were subjected to growing up, especially since children are still dealing with those same things today, sixty years later. While there is little physical abuse here, the mental and emotional abuse is abundant.

The church should be a place of love and acceptance, but Yancey instead found teachings of hate and error. Beliefs are passed down from generation to generation, and it is commendable that Yancey broke the cycle when he got older by getting to know people rather than continuing to believe what he'd been taught. Once he finally catches a glimpse of who Jesus really is instead of who he's been taught He was, he never goes back. Today, he is a Christian author of renown.

If you want to understand how racism gets into the heart of a child, read this. If you want to understand how parental words and expectations can damage a child, read this. If you want to be encouraged by someone who shed the bonds of his past, read this.

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First sentence: Not until college do I discover the secret of my father’s death. My girlfriend, who will later become my wife, is making her first visit to my home city of Atlanta, in early 1968. The two of us stop by my grandparents’ house with my mother, have a snack, and retire to the living room.

Where The Light Fell is Philip Yancey's memoir. After reading it, it clarifies why his books are almost always touching on two subjects: PAIN and GRACE. For the record, I don't think I've read any of his solo books. Yes, I know he's been around forever and ever--five decades. (His books include: What's So Amazing About Grace?, The Jesus I Never Knew, Where Is God When It Hurts?, Disappointment with God, Soul Survivor, Prayer: Does It Make a Difference?, What Good is God?, The Bible Jesus Read, etc.)

What should you know?

It is a memoir. That sounds obvious. Yet, in skimming the reviews of it so far, I've stumbled across some comments like all this guy talks about is his life. Yes, it's a memoir. He's going to talk about his life.

Yancey is a Christian. But. His faith didn't come easy. He may have been raised in a Christian home, but that complicated matters whether than eased them. That's not me making assumptions. That is his reflection. The book doesn't sugarcoat his long, difficult, uncomfortable, uneasy journey from Christian-in-name-only to actual-Christian. He knew how to put on a show, put on a Christian face, talk Christian-ese, pass as a believer, etc. But he felt it was fake, knew it to be fake. This book spends a great deal of time in his squirming struggles to come to terms with who he is and who God is.

Yancey is human. Again obvious, I know. But his memoir is in many ways ABOUT dysfunctional families. As Tolstoy says, "Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way." The book is about the strained relationships certainly. Readers learn a lot about his mother and his brother.
I'll also add this one shines a light on issues like MENTAL HEALTH and RACISM.

Some might accuse Yancey of being "woke" or going "woke." But if he is, he made that journey decades ago. He was raised racist--and some of that racism was explicitly taught in his Independent Fundamental Baptist church. But also most of his schooling occurred BEFORE integration. He was coming of age during the Civil Rights Movement. And there was tension and conflict. He had to wrestle with ideas and beliefs. He determined for himself that it was wrong, wrong, super-wrong. And that he had to break away from what he'd been taught.

He was raised in an extreme. He grew up Independent Fundamental Baptist. And again he had to wrestle with himself--with ideas, beliefs, etc--to determine what he actually believed. Sometimes that meant departing from the super-strict sometimes arbitrary nature of the IFB. He did attend a Bible college. Rejecting the toxic elements of his past did not--for him--mean tossing God too. But it was a process of separating out what does the Bible actually say AND what do they say the Bible says.

This one might need a couple of trigger warnings. Especially in regards to verbal, mental, emotional, spiritual abuse. It is a heavy read in some places. And it clearly shows the long-term dangers of childhood trauma. Another additional trigger warning about suicidal thoughts and attempts.

It is blurring the lines--a bit--when it comes to comfort zones. At least for me. This book really GOES all the way when it comes to his troubled brother. These are real-life issues. I don't doubt it for a minute. But it's a LOT to take in. And I'm not sure I need to know all the sexual transgressions of his brother in the free love years.

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Suffering and Grace
This book describes the harsh and turbulent upbringing that Philip Yancey and his brother Marshall experienced at the hands of their widowed, impoverished mother. The mother was a Bible teacher at work and a child abuser at home. The boys were victims of physical, emotional, and verbal abuse. They were indoctrinated with the extreme fundamentalist beliefs and culture of several Southern Baptist churches that they attended in Atlanta, Georgia. They were pressured into going to a fundamentalist Bible college after they graduated from high school.

The brothers both rebelled against their dysfunctional family life. Marshall rejected his Christian faith but Philip grew stronger in his faith. Philip found solace in reading, nature, and music. He explored questions about a God of love and grace and wrote about his feelings.

My Thoughts
This book gave me many things to think about. I am sure it was heart-wrenching for Mr. Yancey to go back and relive many of the difficult situations that he wrote about. His writing was brave and I believe he made an honest attempt to uncover the facts of his life as a child and young man.

The author pushed back hard against his mother and the Baptist Church. However, I would not call it "mother-bashing" or "church bashing". He was seeking the truth and I think he found it.

There's an old saying in Texas; "You got to rise above your raisin!". This is exactly what Philip Yancey has done. He became the shining light in his family. He forgave his mother and made many attempts to heal the relationship between his mother and brother.

There are several incidents of animal abuse/neglect in this book that I found very disturbing. These incidents involved a kitten, two dogs, and seventeen box turtles. The experiences with the kitten and dogs took place when Philip was very young and had no control over the situations. I think he loved those animals and was traumatized by their deaths/abandonment. I won't comment about the turtles except to say I wish I could unread the words that described their demise.

This is the first book by Philip Yancey that I have read. I am adding some of his books to my reading list. I think this book will mean more to me after I am more familiar with his work. I highly recommend this book to readers who are fans of this author and anyone who wants to expand and grow their faith in Jesus Christ.

MY RATING: 4 STARS OUT OF 5

FYI ~ I received a free digital copy of this book from NetGalley in exchange for a fair review.

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