"I am a bad mother but am learning to be good"

Frida Liu was having a very bad day. The type of day where you are walking around in a miserable haze, not really knowing what you are doing or why. During her very bad day, she leaves her young daughter, Harriet, home alone, resulting in one of the neighbours calling child welfare and Harriet being removed from Frida's care. This is a cautionary tale about a future in which the state has complete control over your parenting and relationship with your children. I found it very interesting, and terrifying, to imagine this type of future.

I loved the premise of the story, and the execution wasn't bad, but I didn't feel enough for the characters and I didn't love the ending. I am giving it a 3.5 rounded up to 4

dnf @30%

this sounded SO interesting but i have to admit i was discouraged from reading it after seeing lots of friends giving it middling reviews. and I unfortunately have to agree with them. great concept but it’s just wayyyy too slow paced and too much emphasis on relationship drama. I think i would enjoyed this concept a lot more if it was more of a thriller

Wow, this book just left me in a bit of a daze, unable to think of much else all day. This dystopian society was a little too close to how our society appears to be heading concerning motherhood.

This just wasn't for me. I love character-driven novels and have to have someone to follow even if they're despicable narrators. I just didn't like this one.

I received a free ARC from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

I was really looking forward to reading this since it’s gotten a lot of hype. I’m not sure how I feel about it.

There are many strong points to the book. In-depth characters a storyline that flows well and has an interesting and mostly believable premise. The couple of downfalls to me: overly vulgar at least once when it didn’t really enhance the story, somewhat predictable, and just overall annoyance with the main character.

Goodness me - if you do not like to feel stressed when reading, do not pick up this book. I think I read the whole thing with my jaw clenched and my teeth gritted.

Touted as a dystopian novel in the vein of The Handmaids Tale, this is the story of Frida who on a "very bad day" does something to her child that brings her under the strict and completely revamped gaze of Child Protective Services. As you can tell from the title, she then finds herself at a school for mothers that is pretty much every mums worst nightmare.

It is certainly a page turner - some parts in the middle dragged a bit and felt repetitive - but there was no way I was going to stop reading until I found out what would happen. It felt a bit Salem Witch Trially (not a real word) in some parts, and a bit like "The Natural Way of Things". It just made me feel mad whilst reading the whole thing. I think some parts are a bit if a stretch - but it is fiction - so suspend your reality if you are going in. Other parts are pretty spot on in their social commentary in regards to different expectations placed on mothers and fathers, racial discimintaion, and the pressure placed on some mums to be perfect.

Overall - I can't say it was "enjoyable" but it is definitely good!

This year one of my goals was to pick up titles from book clubs that I typically adore the picks from, and jump out of my comfort zone more to read books that I may not have otherwise picked up. One of the ones I was SUPER excited to read was THE SCHOOL OF GOOD MOTHERS, a #ReadWithJenna pick that I was lucky enough to get thanks to Simon & Schuster having it as a Book Club Favorites selection!

This debut novel was such a thought-provoking title, constantly making me really consider not only what was going on for each of the characters, but about my own thoughts and opinions, breaking points, parenting habits + techniques.

“I should have thought harder about that before coming here. The judge made it seem like I had a choice, but ‘choice’ and this place do not belong in the same sentence.”

Jessamine Chan uses Frida's story about one "bad day" and takes us on a journey almost as extreme as The Handmaid's Tale in how scarily easy it would be to go from point A to point B, how it only takes ONE seemingly small choice to impact something HUGE. It is not an easy to read book, but one that constantly makes you uncomfortable in a way that makes you wonder about who decides what makes a good parent, how consequences can be different based on sex, race, and interpretation. Not only does it make you question what is happening during Frida's timeline as it's written on the page, but will continue to make you think about the choices you make long after closing the last page.

Highly recommend this book for any mother who thinks she's alone, who's ever thought she could do better at parenting, or wondered "what if." Chan delivers a book full of powerful words, important characters, with an incredible message that will make this book memorable for anyone who reads it.

In this debut novel, one lapse in judgment lands a young mother in a government reform program where custody of her child hangs in the balance.

The School for Good Mothers by Jessamine Chan is a 2022 book I was very much looking forward to. I expected something along the lines of Handmaid's Tale and The Power. And yes, it's definitely along those lines and I think the concept is solid.

Unfortunately, it just didn't live up to the hype for me. I hardly DNF books but at 50%, I was still struggling to connect with characters and/or the writing style. Something about it felt very repetitive.

Overall, I loved the concept and the underlying messaging in the book but felt disconnected completely.

Okay, I actually finished this one awhile ago but I needed to sit with it. It is book club gold. You will need to talk to someone about it. As a parent, this one struck close to home. As an American, this one struck close to home.

I don't think that anyone will be able to make a good argument that what Frida does is okay. It is not. Even in depression, even in post-partum what she did should have had consequences. However, what happened and what she needed (therapy, a break, understanding and grace) were so far apart it is terrifying.

In this (hopefully) alternate-reality novel, The School for Good Mothers, Frida has a "bad" day. CPS is called and Frida is enrolled in their pilot program - The School for Good Mothers. It is a year long program with no contact with her child and at the end an all or nothing verdict - return to being a mom or complete loss of parental rights.

The swing of emotions throughout the book were wild. Outrage, understanding, disgust, more outrage, sadness, anger, dismay - the thesaurus is not enough. Particularly, once you learn how there is also a School for Good Fathers and then, of course, the disparity in expectations.

I know this novel will not be everyone's cup of tea all the way through - and the writing style sometimes was not my favorite. In fact, I had to reread the last three pages several times to make sure I understood how the story ended. But, on my review scale anything that is going to give me all the feels, leave me thinking about it long after the pages run out, and make me want to talk about all the parts is a five star book for me.

"The School for Good Mothers" is the kind of fiction infused with so much truth about our lives that it hurts, the kind of dystopia that we must admit is reality for some people already. Jessamine Chan demonstrates a deep understanding about the level of perfection America demands from mothers, an expectation that is too often unaccompanied by much in the way of structural support. We want women who parent like they don't have jobs and who work like they don't have children. But even that's not enough. We want women who are nurturing, who are talented cooks and intuitive healers, who have no desires or worries of their own. In Ward's near future, the state jumps in when women fall short. Mothers who left a young child alone for hours, who "allowed" a child to fall and hurt themselves, who punished a child too harshly are rounded up and sent off to a special school for a year. There they'll have an "opportunity" to overcome their shortcomings as parents and be reunited with their children. But who can survive a year of separation? What do people do when subjected to extreme surveillance? Chan asks these questions and more: Which mothers are likely to be caught up in such a system? Where do race and class enter into the equation? The book is disturbing and thought provoking on many levels.

Caveat -- I am just one chapter in!!! BUT this is a topic I have covered for 13 years, as founder of the Free-Range Kids movement and now president of Let Grow (LetGrow.org) , the nonprofit promoting childhood independence.
Regardless of the inciting incident in The School for Good Mothers, good mothers HAVE been investigated and/or arrested or even thrown in jail for:
*Letting their 9-year-old play at a safe, popular park while they worked their shift at McDonalds (look up Debra Harrell).
*Letting their kids, 10 and 6, walk home from the park together (look up The Meitivs of Maryland).
*Letting their 8-year-old walk the dog around the block (Corey Widen, Wilmette).
*Accidentally losing track of their toddler a few minutes at a family picnic (Vanessa Peoples, Aurora, Colorado).
*Having their kids stay home alone while they worked their shift at a pizza parlor (often POVERTY is mistaken for neglect. See Shaina Bell, Ohio).
*Letting their kids, 11, 9 and 5, play at the playground across from their apartment (Natasha Felix, Chicago).
This novel may help the authorities realize that parents know and love their kids better than anyone, and that "neglect" occurs only when a parent is putting their child in obvious and likely danger. Not just any time a child is unsupervised.
To date, three states have passed "Reasonable Childhood Independence" laws that narrow the neglect laws this way. If you're interested in joining the cause, please visit Let Grow and click on "Our Advocacy." NO ONE thinks a toddler should be left alone for two hours! But many of us believe that kids who are a little older need some unsupervised time to grow bold, curious, resilient. Parents who want to grant their kids some independence – or who MUST do that, because they literally can’t afford the cost of constant helicoptering -- need to know they won't be treated as criminals unless they are truly ignoring real, not "What if???", danger.
And now -- off I go to read the rest of this gripping novel!

Wow this book was a hard read. It was just so true that instead of being cathartic it was actually painful. I did come away happy I read it but it was strange to realize how differently I would have enjoyed it before being a mother myself.

The School for Good Mothers is a slightly-in-the-future dystopian novel following the events of Frida Liu's bad day, wherein she is sent to a bad mothers program in the hopes of regaining parental rights over her one-year-old daughter, Harriet. The School for Good Mothers also delves into the industrial prison complex, race, and age in relation to motherhood. However, the strongest point of the novel is its analysis of the impossibly high standards with which mothers are held and the unrelenting sacrifice and sense of self expected of mothers. The end of The School for Good Mothers will have you reflecting on your assumptions and biases of mothers and prompt you to hug the mothers in your life a bit tighter and longer than usual.

I had heard a lot of comparisons with this book to The Handmaid's Tale and I would honestly say that I see that as a bit of a reach. I can see where there are some parallels to that type of treatment of women, but nowhere in the same universe. I have to say that this book got me thinking about parents who do abuse and abandon their children and coming from the perspective of someone who was adopted, I wasn't completely mad at this idea. I think a school where parents go to learn to be better parents could be helpful. I think this situation was a bit extreme, but it is a work of fiction so it gets a pass. The book does make you think though which is often times the goal. I cannot say that I really loved the character of Frida. She seemed a bit hung up on her ex's new relationship, but I am also not a divorced single mother whose husband left her right after they had a baby together. I just did not find her character endearing. Overall, I would recommend the book, but with the comparison being made, as I listed above, I feel like others' expectations might be in a different space and lead to them not liking the book as much as they would if that preconceived notion wasn't there.

**2.5

This is an interesting book. I will say I found the writing highly accessible and, despite the issues I have with it, it was an entertaining read overall, albeit somewhat slow and unemotional. I do appreciate the commentary on the burdens/too high expectations placed on mothers, however, the combination of that with this dystopian society did not really work for me. I think most people can agree that mothers face unfair expectations every day, but they are believable expectations. Individually, they are expectations that can be met and ideally would be met, as everyone wants to do the best they can for their children. Obviously not every single one of those expectations can and should be met every single day, at all times, and that's where the expectations become unrealistic. The basic premise of the book and everything the mothers are expected to do in this society are completely unrealistic and not based on any kind of reality, at least in my opinion, and for that reason I had a hard time buying any aspect of the story. I think if the society in this book had some kind of basic reality attached to it, it would have packed more of a punch for me, but because I found it so unrealistic, it did pretty much nothing for me.

This was a great story about a mom who becomes overwhelmed and makes a bad choice to leave her daughter home alone. What follows is CPS stepping in and taking over her world. It was creepy to think about cameras being installed to watch Frida's movements in her own home. Yet it did not seem far fetched. This was an uncomfortable read, but engaging. It did remind me of the Handmaid's Tale. Mothers are expected to give over their entire lives to their children or they are deemed bad mothers. Our society feels like it is moving in this direction. Earlier generations were allowed to play and explore on their own, and now parents are expected to constantly provide entertainment and stimulation to their children. We do not allow children to experience boredom and form their imaginations. I would have liked a little more in depth character development, but overall I thought the writing was well done.

Thank you to Netgalley for the ARC.

I had high high expectations for this book. The dystopian premise was so intriguing, the blurbs comparing it to Handmaid's Tale were exciting, and then it being chosen as a Read with Jenna pick made them balloon even further, Ultimately, the execution fell short of my expectations, which was definitely partially my fault for building it up so much. I didn't find a ton of growth in the main character and I didn't quite understand how we had gotten to this dystopian alter-universe.

While beautifully written, I found this book too hard to read because of the subject matter. Leaving a baby alone for hours is really inexcusable. I would recommend this book only to people who know what it's about.

Thank you to NetGalley, Simon & Schuster, and Jessamine Chan for the Arc of The School for Good Mothers in return for my honest opinion.

I was really looking forward to reading this book and was happy that it was a recent selection by a celebrity book club that I follow. Unfortunately, this was a mostly DNF for me. The first several chapters started off strong, But once the story moved on to Frida's arrival at the school, the plot became repetitive and boring. I made it through 75% of the book before finally skimming the final pages as I was curious how it would end. My opinion is a very unpopular one as there are many rave reviews for this book. While this book was not for me---readers who enjoy dystopian-type storylines will most likely enjoy it!

I only got about a third of the way through, but I don’t think this is the ~vibe~ for me right now. Clearly I’m not going to be a great resource for why you should or should not read this but some of the feedback from my book club chat was—“repetitive in the middle”, “stressful & boring” and just kind of……I don’t know, weird?

There’s for sure some interesting concepts here, with commentary on the surveillance state, racism, sexism, authoritarianism, etc., so I wouldn’t completely write it off. But I would definitely exercise caution and maybe read a few *actual* reviews before going in.