This was a very interesting book. Reading a book about a killer written mostly by the kill, is not very common. I felt weird reading it because on one hand i wanted to understand more. On the other hand it felt like giving more attention to the killer over the victims. The narrator was really good and kept you engaged the whole time

Calling all true crime lovers! This book is for you. This one is a bit more disturbing in the keeping victims longer out of loneliness. This is an insider look into the minds of these types of criminals. Written by Nilsen himself, it's sure to be a hit with you if like this genre.

In the 1970's, Dennis Nilsen was convicted of killing twelve young men, but his true number of murders is probably sixteen or more. For that, he was convicted and given a life sentence and served thirty-four years before his own death. This is Nilsen's autobiography.

He was born in Scotland and lived with his mother, siblings and grandparents. Some of his earliest memories were of his grandfather molesting him, an act that extended across years. When he was old enough, Nilsen joined the army and was well thought of but left due to the impossibility of being openly gay. He was a policeman for a short time and then started his murderous acts. He would invite the men home with him from a bar, drug them, strangle them, then use their bodies in his fantasy ritual.

While this was an interesting look into his mind, in the end it was a basically self-serving exercise. The majority of the book was of his life in prison which is inevitably a very limited viewpoint as not much occurs differently from day to day. Even after years, he admits to having fantasies about various men he sees and thinks about how he would kill them. Would his life have been different if he hadn't had a history of early molestation and if the laws about homosexuality had been different as he grew up? Perhaps but the reality is we each most live with the situation we find ourselves in and most do not use others in such a way to satisfy their own needs. This book is recommended for true crime readers.

Thank you Netgalley and Dreamscape Media for this advance listener copy in exchange for my honest review.

I couldn't do it. I've never DNF'd a book at 10% until this point. I have never DNF'd a book due to disturbing content. I can read just about anything. Books like Woom, My Dark Vanessa, and Dead Inside haven't bothered me in any way. However, this one I couldn't stomach. Maybe because it's a biographical piece, so it's a true story, but the graphic descriptions of pedophilia were too much for me.

There is an audience for this book, I just couldn't do it. I will not be reviewing on Goodreads as I didn't finish the book.

I had a very hard time deciding on a rating for this book. I really really wish we could give half stars as a 2.5 would have been prefect. I love love love true crime books and getting to listen to a book from the killer himself sounded prefect to me. But this book was so long and boring. I had an awful time trying to get into the book and then could only listen to it for short periods of times before my mind would wonder. I'm glad I read it, I have no desire to read it again!

*received for free for honest review* would never read again, thankfully i was able to listen to this sped up otherwise i never would have made it thru, pretty gross and dark.

I had to give myself several days after finishing this audiobook; it unnerved me. I felt gross after finishing, a voyeur into the mind of evil. First, the narrator selection was superb - his calm, level voice added so much to the story; a low-key creepiness especially during descriptions of the crimes. The story itself was unbelievable. I am a fan of true crime, but this book is certainly not for the casual fan. It was intense and gripping, yet somehow you almost feel sympathetic for a man that killed 12 people. Well done (which saying makes me feel dirty complementing a serial killer on his prose).

Man, where to start with this one. I have always been a true crime enthusiast. Serial killers fascinate me and sparked a desire in me to learn more about the psychology of people. I have read a lot of books on true crime and listened to many podcasts covering true crime and serial killers. I have never experienced something like this book.

I don't even know how to rate this book or express my thoughts on it. How do you talk about the life and motivations of a serial killer written by his own hands. What "facts" around the case and the person are true? The ones from the killer himself? From those that were looking from the outside and looking for answers?

In all, this will be a book that I think about and ponder over often. I'm not sure I will ever read another book like this - either willingly or because nothing like this will be published again.

It is important to know that he describes his own childhood abuse in detail and also the abuse and murders of the men he murdered. It is not a book for the those that cannot read about those situations.

This might be one of the most intriguing true crime books I've ever read. There is so much to dissect with this that I think it would make the perfect book club book.

Dennis Nilsen seems to be the serial killer of the moment. Several books and TV documentaries have or are coming out about him. This is his autobiography. It is very hard to read and just as hard to review. Most of the book talks about his sexual fantasies, which include fantasies of having sex with young boys. I really had a hard time with it. Now don't get me wrong, the book is actually written very well, but it is the subject matter that was hard. I wanted to read it for the murders, which are just a very small part of the book. It does give you a sense of how his mind worked. He did talk about his time in the military, which gave him a lot of training. But his impulses always seemed to take over. If you can handle explicit sexual fantasies and talk, this is an interesting book. But if you are looking to know mostly about his murders, this is not the book for that.

Most importantly, a big thank you to NetGalley, Dr. Mark Pettigrew and Dreamscape Media for providing me with a copy of this publication in exchange for an honest review.

"There are no monsters in this world, they're just people. There are strong people and there are weak people, I think I'm an amalgam of the two. Judge for yourself."

Written over span of 18 years, this is Dennis Nilsen's controversial autobiography written from his jail cell. Although he is a splendid writer, I couldn't get past his in depth imagery he provides when describing young boys. It leaves a bad taste in one's mouth and I found myself feeling as if I were listening to pornography rather than someone trying to give me insight into their life. It took every ounce of effort to listen from the perspective of an intelligent, open-minded, independent thinker but just couldn't get past one more instance of Nilsen explaining what the sight of a child's bottom did for him sexually.

This book, again, although beautifully written, was just not for me.

Friends, I made a mistake. Recently, I set out to review a book called History of a Drowning Boy. What I thought was a book about serial killer Dennis Nilsen was instead his extensive and extremely descriptive autobiography. Gathered and prepared by Dr. Mark Pettigrew, the book shares Nilsen's experiences in his own words, including his extensive sexual abuse at the hands of his own grandfather. There are hours of this stuff.  In prison, Nilsen wrote thousands of pages about his life in prison, his interactions with prisoners and authorities, and the false reporting the media provided. He wanted to have it published while he was alive, but thankfully it was blocked until after his death.

I read a lot of true crime and listen to true crime podcasts, but even I didn't make it very far into this book. Nielson's experiences alone are horrifying, and I hadn't even made it into his justifications. I just had to put the book down.

For those of you with strong stomachs who can endure descriptions of horrific child abuse, sexual assault, and horrific murder, you'll likely be able to get through this. For my own mental health, I put the book down and walked away.

History of a Drowning Boy is available today.

Very interesting to see inside the mind of a notorious serial killer. Though I'm not sure that we can completely trust everything the author says, his remorse for his crimes seems genuine. However, even though he expresses remorse, he also takes no responsibility for anything, but has excuses and reasons for everything.

I tried to give this one a couple of hours but it just got to be too graphic for me (and I can handle pretty graphic stuff), and I hadn't even gotten to the murders.

I find his story very interesting, and I would read/listen to a book about him, but not his autobiography. It got to a point where it seemed like all he talked about were his sexual encounters and fantasies, and needed to mention every detail. It was becoming too much and I had to stop.

My disappointment in History of a Drowning Boy began with the synopsis. This implies I'm about to enter the mind of a serial killer. I requested the book. Explicit male-on -male sex, pickups, rapes, pedophilia, and molestation are the focus of the book in nauseatingly raw detail: not mentioned at all in the synopsis.

I do enjoy autobiographies, true crime, and serial killer insights. However, the excessive abuse had me wondering was I being punished. At one point I looked to see if I misread or possibly skimmed the synopsis. Some more audio, and I looked at the site again, did I miss seeing this is a text book? No I had not.

I hope you find this note helpful when deciding whether or not you can stomach the graphic content.

Thank you Netgalley for giving me the opportunity.


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This book does need to come with the warning of the graphic nature. It is a good book and by the end you will have all kind of mixed emotions toward Dennis Nilsen. Parts of the book were had to read simply due to the graphic description of Dennis' thoughts when killing. I will recommend but only to a select audience.

Following the autobiography of Dennis Nilsen, this audiobook is a chilling and nauseating look into the mind of a serial killer.

Not for the faint of heart, the audiobook painstakingly explores the trauma and psychotic behavior that plagued Dennis from his early life, as he plagued his victims.

Even the most devout true crime reader might struggle to consume this journey of a tragic and violent man.