I’ve never read a book by this author before but I really enjoyed this one. Because this author is new for me I didn’t really have any expectations for this book. It was so well written and the story kept me wondering how it would end. I give this book 3 stars because it was very good but this isn’t the best book I’ve ever read. I still loved to read it.

Thanks to NetGalley for this review copy.

"Hold My Place" is a wicked ride that will have you guessing what's real and what isn't until the very last page.

*Book received from NetGalley in return for a review. This review may not be reproduced, in whole or in part, without explicit consent from the author*

I … I think I liked this. Sorry, that sounds like a damning with faint praise but it’s not meant to be. Hold My Place is intriguing and well-written, and ended on a satisfyingly chilling note. It engaged me. It just sort of didn’t wow me.

And I feel bad saying that because … I mean. Y’know. I write romance. I believe in tropes and genre positioning and that execution is far more important than originality. But I think in the thriller/horror space, especially because at the moment it feels like I can’t take two steps without stubbing my toe on the latest thriller, a book needs a little something extra. Something to make stand out. Something to make you remember it.

Anyway, Hold My Place is narrated by Sigrun, a … goth librarian (yes you read that right) in her thirties who falls in love with an already-married chef. They have an intense emotional affair, even though Edgar is clearly still besotted with his wife—a contradiction that doesn’t trouble Sigrun—and then Edgar’s wife conveniently dies. Leaving him both grief-stricken and ready to plunge into a relationship with Sigrun. The book opens with Sigrun stabbing him with a kitchen knife so you know from the outset how that turns out.

This all unfolds at a good pace, with the red flags getting redder and redder as the narrative progresses. Shades of Bluebeard and Rebecca give the story a pleasingly gothic edge, despite its modern setting. And while I wasn’t surprised by the conclusion, it still offered a satisfying payoff.

There were, however, a few things here that didn’t quite work for me. I haven’t quite figured out in my own head how I want writers to deal with the pandemic in their writing: I’ve read a few romances recently that have referenced it obliquely, and at least one SFF that has run headlong at the whole plague concept. This integrates the pandemic into the narrative, and the impact of COVID on the world provides a backdrop for the Sigrun’s burgeoning love affair with Edgar, and explanation for his wife’s abrupt death. I … I am not sure how I felt about this inclusion honestly. I don’t think the book *needed* it—I think the same events could have been brought out easily enough by another route—so while I didn’t find it exploitative it didn’t super thrill me. Your mileage may vary on this.

I’m also not sure how I felt a thirty-something goth. Maybe I’ve just slipped into the worst kind of middle-age but … is this something people of my generation are still doing? Are we still goths? Are we goths with mortgages? I confess, there was part of me that wondered if Sigrun was a goth in order to make the differences between her and the other wives (for Edgar has a bunch of dead ones in his past – this is an early twist, so not a spoiler) as marked as possible, and have very straightforward ways for the narrative to demonstrate when those differences start to blur in a creepy and potential supernatural fashion. I did like she was a librarian though—having many librarian friends, her asides on being a librarian (“librarians have the most degenerate taste in literature there is”) were definitely some of the highpoints of the book for me.

Edgar, by contrast, is kind of an utter nonentity. And that makes sense in a way: the book is not, after all, Sigrun’s love story. Plus, her obsession with this guy who is so very clearly just a guy is one of the early red flags that all is not what it seems in this story. The problem is, it’s just not … super emotionally engaging. Their initial affair—where they walk through the city talking—is mainly reported. And the latter half of the book, when Sigrun is actually with Edgar is just a hazy sexfest of chocolate raspberries and dead-wife-letters. I liked the theory that the women in Edgar’s life ended up being so much more vivid than he was, despite the fact they’re dead, but I’m just not sure it worked in practice. I mean, the heroine could have been humping her Garrus Vakarian bodypillow for all my interest in the business.

To be honest, I might have been more interested if she *had* been humping a Garrus Vakarian bodypillow.

Also this book has a … relationship shall we say … with romance novels. In that the heroine defensively admits to reading them, and there are regular references to how events in the book are or are not romance novels

“As far Edgar … the distance was gutting. This wasn’t the romantic yearning penned by the writers of Regency romance or the luridly illustrated books whose covers featured bodybuilding Highland chiefs dressed in nothing but kilts. This was a blood-sickness.”

Or

“I will love you so hard you’ll thank me when your bones break. We’re going to make all those old romances look about as exciting as pharmaceutical warnings.”

I mean, I didn’t get the feeling it was dunking on the genre exactly. It was nice to have a heroine who enjoyed romances, but I guess I’m always wary about texts of any kind that position themselves in opposition to what they perceive (or what is publicly perceived) as the “love” or “romance that romance novels represent. Because romance novels aren’t one thing: and while obviously it is central to the genre that the love between the central characters is healthy and positive, that doesn’t mean it’s always the same. On the other hand, since the author is essentially exploring a deeply unhealthy and selfish love here, I can also appreciate her explicitly differentiating that from romance novel love. Unless, of course, the implication here is that the heroine’s romance reading habit has left her psychologically primed to accept inexplicable love-feelings when they strike her, thus leaving her an easy victim of dark supernatural shenanigans.

I guess my general feeling (and this does spring from unabashed protectiveness towards the genre, not just because I write in it, but because it gets so much shit from the world at large): if you reference romance, you better damn well know what you’re doing with that reference.

In any case, while not every aspect of his book worked for me, it was in general well-constructed and well-told (while the language sways a little uncomfortable from the natural and idiomatic to the super gothic, the super gothic sections are *chef’s kiss*) and the conclusion, although it was far from anything that belongs in the romance genre, did rather appeal to the darkest corners of my romance reader’s heart.

The title term evokes all the clubs & get togethers one goes/went to with all the pageantry & shenanigans encompassed.
Story is told from the point of view of a woman in her 30s still holding on to her Goth lifestyle & comfortable with being alone rather than settling for less, or at least not looking for any permanent, live-in commitments. There's a reigning edge of bitter snap in her independence that she plays out with style in her role as librarian Goth rebel. She goes to a get together from work & the chef who doesn't acknowledge her has every fiber in her being strumming. The plunge starts & she joins his cooking class filled with likeminded though entirely different women. Naturally he is married.
The obsession blooms like a nightshade, beautiful, deadly, velvet soft & fragile but also evokes cold, sharp like broken glass cutting through skin & the running blood warm dripping down as you watch it spatter & curse yourself for not being more careful. This turns into a taunt & she loss herself in his reality & past. The author is good & feel she could have flashed out more in the end.

I enjoyed reading this book. I liked the pace and the connection to the reader. I guessed the ending, but it was still good!

Sigrun is a goth librarian. She becomes infatuated with Edgar, an extremely handsome married chef.
Edgar shows interest in her and they begin taking long walks together. The pandemic takes Edgar’wife away from him and he marries Sigrun. Now she finds out that all his previous girlfriends and wives - a total of three have died. Dark magic is in the air.

I managed to squeeze this novel in as my last one of August, as its only 280 pages long, and I read it in a couple of days. I went into it knowing it was going to be a thriller, but didn’t actually realise there was supernatural element to it until the novel was coming to a close. It was a great surprise, and the twist was very clever.

However, I did not enjoy this novel as much as I’d hoped. I found Sigrun’s character quite annoying at times, and I often had no sympathy for her, especially as she complained about Edgar’s wife Octavia, as she knew full well he was married when they met.

Parts of Sigrun’s personality becomes clearer as the novel progresses, as you realise that it’s not necessarily her own free will that is causing her to act this way, but I still had a bit of an issue with how she treated her friend that she worked with in the library.

I actually did like the character of Edgar, he seemed to be a very kind man, and I think he did care for Sigrun in his own way, even if there was more to it than met the eye. What he did for love, was very sweet, and he was incredibly devoted.

The twist at the end was definitely the best part, it was very clever and unexpected, and something I hadn’t seen before, which is why I am giving this a slightly higher rating than I would for the rest of the novel!

I received this book as an ARC from NetGalley to review. All opinions are my own.

Hold My Place is what I would call a psychological thriller. It is the fourth novel by Windwalker and so far the only one which I have read.

The book centres around Sigrun, a thirty-two-year-old gothic librarian, who falls in love with Edgar, a very handsome (and married) chef from the area. When his wife, Octavia, passes away from Covid-19 (which is an ongoing theme in this book, lockdown etc), they pursue a relationship. But soon it becomes clear to Sigrun that things may not be as they seem. Two of Edgar's wives have passed away in less than a decade, along with his high school girlfriend and fiance. They all seem to have passed from natural causes, so it must be a freaky coincidence, right? Maybe not.

Alright, so the first thing I'm going to talk about is the character of Sigrun. I found her narrative enjoyable but at some parts annoying. She is naive, to the point of being frustrating, despite being a librarian (who - from my own personal experiences are some of the most intelligent and considerate people I know). Her inner voice is almost adolescent like - which shows she is young at heart but can get grating considering she is in her early thirties (she calls herself middle-aged although she is not). The gothic portion of her personality (a major component) feels juvenile and somewhat fanfictiony. But still, she is tall, large, and doesn't conform to fashion standards, which means I immediately liked her.

A part of the book I did like were the letters. Edgar keeps the letters from his past lovers and gives them to Sigrun to read. (Super weird move but ok - if my husband had a box full of his three dead lovers stuff and asked me to look at them I wouldn't have it, but I guess Edgar is REALLY hot). However, the font of the letters drove me insane. It was extremely hard to read, despite me wanting to hear the narrative voices of the wives and girlfriends of the past.

I didn't love this book, but I did read it at a decent pace because it was compelling and short. Like, almost too short, but not actually because the story did need to end there.

I would recommend this book for readers who like Verity or Behind Her Eyes. As it is similar enough to those in some ways.

While it's a thought-provoking read, and generally enjoyable, it just wasn't for me. But it might be for you, Give it a Go!

Such a strange story of love and obsession. The ending was nothing I expected. Well written and eerie in its storytelling. Set in pandemic times was a nod to every day struggles of the past two years.

Thank you NetGalley for this arc

Sigrun is a librarian, a goth, who decides to take a cooking class run by a fancy french restaurant. From the very first class she develops an overwhelming crush on the sexy chef Edgar who is teaching the class, just like every other woman there. But a crush is harmless, right? You think someone is cute, see they are married, and think no more. However, Sigrun signed up to the classes after seeing Edgar while at a meal in his restaurant. She couldn’t stop thinking about him. It then seems that the feeling is mutual after the first class.

The crush becomes an obsession. She can’t wait to spend every free moment with Edgar. But he will never leave his wife, nor cheat on her. Then comes a pandemic. Edgars wife sadly falls victim. He needs support. This is where Sigrun steps in. Soon things begin to take a darker turn. The relationship moves from that of the pages of a romance novel, to that of….something else. Sigrun’s personality starts to fade. Edgar is trying to change her. Control her. Or is he? Then Sigrun discovers the real sinister truth. It is more shocking than any coercive control relationship.

This book was a very different read for me. I don’t tend to read romance novels. But this was dark, creepy, and mysterious, so ticked my boxes. It was a little slower paced at times, when building up the relationships. It also left many questions of HOW at the end, but it was a brilliant if gut wrenching ending.

*I received this book from NetGalley for review but all opinions are my own.

You've heard the phrase "she lost herself in her lover". This is like that. Sigrun meets Edgar and instantly she is lost to him. They develop a relationship that consists of walking in the rain, holding hands, and talking. Eventually Edgar becomes a widower and Sigrun is there for him in his grief. As they become lovers and then marry Sigrun slowly changes in subtle ways. Her hair and makeup, her taste in drinks....its like she becoming someone else.

The prose in Hold My Place is beautiful and it is written as if it was a long diary entry or a letter to us. There is a sinister undecurrent to all of this romance. This will become clear towards the end of the letter, although it may not be the end of the story.
#HoldMyPlace #Netgalley

The book is set in a midst of a pandemic. Sigrun carries herself in a gothic way and works as a librarian. She decides to join a cooking class with Chef Edgar at a fancy French restaurant. From her first cooking class, she develops a crush on Edgar, and starts to take night walks with Edgar despite Edgar having a wife. Edgar's wife succumbs to the infection and dies. Not long after, Sigrun marries Edgar. Edgar gives her a box of belongings from his previous lovers: Devlin, Brigitte and Octavia, who all died. Sigrun reads all the letters, looks at all the pictures, until she reads Devlin's last letter. After reading it, she realises that she has changed; she used to hate vanilla smell, but she now likes it. She used to hate coffee and martinis, but she now drinks both. Her changes are not sudden, her changes are planned.

It's a good book, and I have never read the story line like this. I like the plot although it's a bit slow. I couldn't stop reading it until the end, and I was gutted with the ending, but I can't deny that the ending is good. Would love to know more on how Devlin could do what she did, that would have made it a bit more realistic.

An unlikely romance.

Edgar and Sigrun meet during a cooking class and she instantly falls for him. She is a middle-aged goth librarian. He is a polished, successful master chef. His voice, his presence, his glances are like a drug to her. They begin to take slow walks after class, holding hands, talking about fairytales, literature and German baking. Edgar is emotionally cheating on his wife, Octavia.

Sigrun's every thought centers around Edgar.

When his wife,Octavia suddenly dies of Covid, Sigrun is more than happy to be there for him, even assisting with the funeral. There is a sense that Edgar isn't as upset as he should be although he loved Octavia dearly.

They soon marry and Sigrun continues to obsess over Edgar. His skeleton's begin to surface when she learns he has not one, but three dead wives. She feels unsettled by the revelations. She begins to fear him, but perhaps she has seen too many murder podcasts or suspense novels and she is just haboring a silly suspicion? Only time will tell.

Told mostly in first person through Sigrun. The author writes in almost a poetic way, using vivid words and creating a mystical atmosphere. It isn't a fast paced novel, but one you want to continue to pick up and learn more about these two seemingly mismatched mates who whisper sweet nothings to each other.

The ending is twisted and will be controversial, and I should have seen it coming before the knife slipped in, maybe.....

Recommend to those who enjoy something different, a bit creepy, hypnotic, and free of the thriller tropes that dominate these days. You'll feel the horror in the final pages.

Thanks to Netgalley for a free copy.

Okay. This is a fast paced, kinda twisty book. Honestly it seems like everything happened so fast. Where as other books I've read with the same MO take its time. I did not believe in Sigruns love or romance. Seemed bland
And it developed quickly. After I read this I even went back through and skimmed and still felt dissatisfied. Just doesn't hold up to the potential it had if the author had taken her time with it. I gave it 2.5 stars bc I loved the mystery surrounding it what little it had

Eeek! This is a story of pure obsession and I am all about it!!!

Hold My Place, by Cassandra Windwalker, was an instant favorite. This is a fast paced, intense read that shows how far someone will go to get what (or WHO) they want.

After Sigrun meets Edgar she becomes obsessed with being close to him. However, there is one little problem, Edgar is married, happily married.

When Edgar's beautiful wife is diagnosed with covid, Edgar is beside himself. He takes refuge in the friendship that is developing between him and Sigrun.

Things take a suspicious turn when Edgar confides in Sigrun about how his first wife and high school sweet heart had both died as well.

Hmmmm.. where is this going? I think you are going to have to add Hold My Place to your pre-order list!

Thank you Black Spot Books and NetGalley for this amazing thriller.

I was so excited when I was approved for Hold My Place because it looked and sounded amazing!
And it sure was! The setting and writing was my favorite it. It really drew you in as a reader and held your attention! I enjoyed the characters they were crazy fun.
The story itself was great and one I enjoyed!
Thank you again for the opportunity to read and review this great new release!
I will copy my review to my platforms closer to pub date!

This book is a modern take on obsessive lovers and the chaos that ensues. We have Sigrun, a goth librarian, who becomes obsessed with Edgar, a well-known chef. The 2 strike up a quite bizarre emotional affair, which turns deeper once Edgar's wife dies from a pandemic illness. Through a veil of obsession, past lovers, and keepsakes, Sigrun navigates her new life with Edgar. 

The author has a way with prose and sentence structure... the arrangement of words is pretty beautiful. While the creep factor was substantial, this one fell a little short for me. I did have an issue with the pacing, especially at the end of the book. It felt a bit too quick for me and I had a few questions. 

All in all, I found this book kept me entertained and engaged. Even though the pacing was a bit off, I did think this was an enjoyably dark read and would pick up more of Cassondra Windwalker's work. 

I've received this ARC in exchange for an honest review. Thank you to Netgalley and Black Spot Books.

Personal Chef..

This is a book about love verging on obsession.

Sigrun and Edgar meet by chance and immediately she is out of her mind to be closer to him. However, he’s married and in love with his wife.

Taking place just prior to and in the beginning stages of the pandemic, Edgar and Sigrun become friends of a sort during his teaching of a cooking class. Is it an affair if there’s no physicality?

When Edgar’s gorgeous spouse succumbs to Covid unexpectedly, he’s bereft. However, he confides to Sigrun that this isn’t the first time. Both his first wife and college sweetheart died too and though the deaths were considered natural, Sigrun can’t help but wonder.

Things that make you go hmmmm...

My first impression of this book was that I’d stumbled on a romance and I don’t do romances. Yes, I know other people love them but they usually don’t work for me.

However, I continued reading because I had been hooked into the disquietude.

I was intrigued with Sigrun the Goth librarian. Assisting patrons with her dyed black hair and full sleeve tattoos tweaked my imagination and her independent thought process didn’t reconcile with her fixation on Edgar. So, I was more than curious.

I was impressed with the author’s unique wording and the near perfected description of someone drunk on another person. Although there were a few lagging moments, numerous quotables maintained my attention for the majority.

I would recommend this to readers searching for alternatives to the worn thriller path or if a subliminal Gothic horror vibe intrigues you. I really enjoyed it!

Thank you to Black Spot Books, Cossandra Windwalker, and NetGalley for my advance electronic copy set to publish on January 22, 2022.

This book is a frustrating read, a harsh juxtaposition of a wide and exciting vocabulary against poor character and plot development. I additionally found the pandemic reference very tacky. Our protagonist was very contradictory, one minute being a level headed and the next completely opposite. The love interest was very mundane, with a lot telling and little showing. The book has potential however needs serious rework regarding plot, characters and context, to be generally enjoyable.

Love love love!!! Nice and creepy, just the way I like it. It'll def make you have goosebumps and make you feel very very unsettled.... in the best possible way. This book gets securely under your skin and won't let you go even after you've finished reading