Cover Image: My Mother, Munchausen's and Me

My Mother, Munchausen's and Me

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Member Reviews

This was very informative and a real eye opener into this disease. I wasn't too aware of it before reading this. It definitely affects people around them in ways I didn't even realize.

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This book was really frustrating, I can't imagine how Helen put up with this woman for as long as she did. I know that's awful to say as she is someone's family member and was clearly mentally ill but a lot of patience must have been needed and I don't think I would be as strong. It was written really well, which made it a really fast-paced read. At least one thing can be said that both Helen and her mother must have some kind of peace now.

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This book was so fascinating!

I thought it was really interesting to read from the prospective of a family member of someone with Munchausen's. It's really important to acknowledge the havoc this illness can wreck on not only the person suffering, but their entire family.

We often hear a lot in media about Munchausen's by proxy so it was interesting to read about Munchausen's itself.

Some of this book is incredibly hard to read, seeing how difficult Helen's life was. But it's impressive to watch as she comes to terms with her mother's behaviour and learns to move on with her life. I can't imagine how difficult it must be to question your mother's illness especially with possible lack of support but thankfully Helen had others she could reach out to with these concerns.

This book is more shocking than fiction & a great read.

I gave it 4 stars⭐

Thank you to Helen Naylor, NetGalley & Thread Books for an eArc of this book in exchange for an honest review.

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This book was both saddening and shocking. I can’t even imagine what it would have been like to grow up in an environment like that. To love you mother so deeply but also know she’s manipulating you must’ve been very hard for Helen.
I think this book is one that needed to be done even just to highlight issues like Munchausen’s and narcissistic personality disorder but mainly for Helen to find some closure in the whole ordeal.
I thought the book was written well and it definitely kept me reading on. I’ve an idea about Munchausen’s already but this was a whole new side of it I’d never heard of and it’s so sad to hear the story of how it all went on for Helen, Elinor and everyone around them.

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A heartbreaking and raw account of decades of manipulation, abuse and lies. Helen attempts to piece together who her mother really was amongst the contradictions from all the versions she presented to different people, as well as her detailed diaries which provide a chilling insight into her mother's mind. A brave but uncomfortable read.

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A powerful and moving read. I don't often read a memoir but this really affected me. I can't bear the thought of abuse or cruelty to children, especially from the person who is programmed to love and care for them above themselves. I can't fathom how it's possible to behave in such a way. Truly disturbing, especially as Helen spent her childhood idolising her mother and believing they had a close relationship. When she realises her mother's illnesses are fabricated it hits her like a ton of bricks. I was so pleased she eventually cut her off - but it still preyed on her mind and affected her life with the loving husband and children. Really disturbing and a bit of an eye opener. #netgalley #mymothermunchausensandme

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A true story of being brought up by a mother with Munchausen's .
A very sad story of all the verbal abuse she got from her mother, a very shocking read of how she was treated all her life.

Munchausen's are very manipulative and brilliant at lying, my ex husband had this and it can be very soul destroying so I understand how she felt in the end when she found out.
It was very tearful that she thought it was all normal.
A good biography well worth a read.

Thanks to Netgalley for the ARC in exchange for my honest review

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I have such conflicting feelings about this read. I sincerely hope it helped Helen Naylor process her feelings about her interactions with her mother. As a former teacher I was devastated to learn that two students I had worked with had dealt with mothers who had harmed them repeatedly in order to get the attention they craved…even as one of the children was in the hospital. The mothers certainly were very convincing at playing the role of loving caring mothers while they were far from that.
It didn’t surprise me that Elinor was able to fool so many but those close to her should have questioned her being so sick she cannot walk and five minutes later going shopping. Her mother clearly suffered from NPD but I am still puzzled over the lack of a Munchausen’s diagnosis from any medical doctor. She spent so many years in and out of offices it shocks me that it was never diagnosed. Helen’s perceptions of her mother being different seemed to always be present. She seemed to focus on her mother dressing and acting much older than she was, which may be due to the fact that she was visually comparing her to her peers mothers.
I was heartened when she did finally receive validations of her suspicions from family members, friends, and some medical staff. So sad for her that it was so delayed. How different her life may have been if someone had taken her under their wing and supported her. I was very impressed with the amazing support Peter offered her. I felt ambivalent about the diary entries. To me they definitely proved the NPD diagnosis. I am relieved that she was finally able to walk away from her toxic mother.
Mothers come in many different shapes and sizes…each with their own baggage. While many of us choose to believe that a loving bond between a baby and it’s mother is a given, unfortunately that is not always the case. Helen Naylor I wish you peace within your soul, as you continue to process your relationship with your mother. Hold your own babies near and dear to your heart.
Many many thanks to Helen Naylor for pouring out her heart, Thread for publishing it, and NetGalley for affording me the opportunity to read this thought provoking book, just recently published.

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What an awesome book, by clearly someone equally as awesome.
Helen and I are similar ages and she has been through so much. To be able to turn it around, make a life for herself and her family is brilliant.
What a fab book!

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A sad but very informative read about a condition rarely spoken of. Elinor was clearly mentally ill and so engrossed in her lies they began to become the truth. I can't imagine what her family especially her daughter Helen went through. There are still a lot of unknown answers but going by the brief glimpse into the diary entries toward the end it all seems so desperately sad.
I wish Helen and her family a long and healthy life

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Helen Naylor, the author, was raised by a narcissistic, controlling, hypochondriac mother who Helen believes had Munchausen. Ellie, Helen’s mum, was always too fake sick to care for her child, care for herself or care for her home. From Helen’s earliest memories, her mum had ME (myalgic encephalomyelitis), or another name for chronic fatigue syndrome. This disease was and still is very hard to diagnose because the symptoms vary from patient to patient and are very subjective. So it’s an easy illness to fake and no one is the wiser, not even the doctors. Most days, she wouldn’t even get out of bed, leaving 6-year-old Helen to care for herself. Nonetheless, Helen loved her mother, said she was her best friend.

After a series of other illnesses that even the doctors said weren’t confirmed, Helen started to realize that her mum had serious psychological issues. Ellie stole her childhood from her and even much of her young adult years.

This is an important story that shines a light on how severe psychological issues can be and the patient themselves aren’t the ones who suffer the most, it’s their families.

I hope Helen has been able to find some peace in her life and carry no guilt from what she perceives as her shortcomings as a daughter. She had more patience for her mum than I ever would.

I rate this book 4 stars as I was thoroughly engrossed from page 1. Thank you NetGalley for an ARC of this book. This is my honest review.

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Oooo I find Munchausens so interesting; I started watching The Act but never did finish it and it was a major talking point of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills a few years ago. So a memoir of somebody who has experienced it first hand is definitely something I want to read!

Helen takes us through her journey acting as a carer for her parents from just 7 years old. Her Dad had a genuine cardiac condition, and her Mother suffered with ME. Although her dad was unwell for the majority of her childhood, his condition never impacted her particularly, although his indifference and drinking contributed to her feeling of neglect. But it was her mother’s requirement to take herself to bed each day for hours at a time leaving Helen to fend for herself which was the real difficulty in her life.

Helen takes us through her experience of living with disabled parents and the fear of spending her whole life caring for them. However, her mothers illness and behaviour begins to unravel and Helen spends so much time and energy trying to support her unsure of what to do next.

There is no real ‘big surprise’ in this book as the title gives away the ‘twist’. However, it is a really insightful book highlighting the struggles that a child can go through in middle class England and the failings of those services who’s aim it is to help and support. The manipulation is astounding and you really feel for so many individuals impacted by the deceit and mental illness.

If I’m honest, this book did go round in a lot of circles and at time the timeline didn’t seem to flow correctly. But I guess it’s just an honest account of somebody’s life which probably is repetitive and timelines don’t always make sense and sometimes are not remembered correctly. I definitely want to read some more accounts of individuals who have either been diagnosed with Munchausens themselves or lived with those who have, so if you have any recommendations let me know!

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Right from the start this book held my interest. It is a very sad read of the power a mother can have over her child without the child realising as they trust their parents. A good read and it opens your mind as to the nature of people.

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This memoir follows the life of Helen as she grows up with her mother Elinor. Elinor has debilitating illnesses that keep her from many things and keep Helen from being the person she truly is meant to be.

While this memoir touches greatly on Munchausen’s, I feel like Helen’s childhood was skipped and her adulthood was slowly drawn out - and the Munchausen’s isn’t really discussed at all until far too late.

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I have heard quite a bit about Munchausen's by Proxy over the years, but not much about Munchausen's itself. In this memoir by Helen Naylor, we learn how her mother's decades of fake illnesses finally led to her death, and how this all had a devastating effect on Helen.

Elinor's illnesses were self-manufactured. But she kept diaries. Dozens and dozens of them over the course of fifty years. As Helen begins reading these diaries she learns so much about her mother, but even about herself as well.

Helen's life was tragic. Her mother was always ill in bed, leaving Helen to fend for herself for days at a time. This was when she was a young child. As a teenager, things became much worse for Helen. As an adult, Helen began reading these diaries and is more than determined never to ever become like her mother. She also learns what love is and how it is an unbreakable bond, even as she survived a tragic past.

I had this book review in audiobook format, and it was narrated by the author. Listening to this book had quite an impact on me. This was no easy book to read or listen to, especially because things were so tragic. Sometimes Helen read the journal entries in order, sometimes randomnly. In either case, they were more than disturbing. Now Helen herself is a mother, and she wants never to repeat her mother's mistakes. More than that, as a reader I often felt as if I were absorbing the same words that Helen was reading, and wondering what it would have been like to be in her shoes, especially when she was a child.

Many thanks to Thread and to NetGalley for this ARC for review. This is my honest opinion.

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.I feel as if I have run the gamut of emotions from anger to sadness, whilst reading this book. It was thought provoking and well written. The relationship between Helen and her mother was certainly a roller coaster and I admire Helen for staying on that roller coaster for as long as she did.Even though it was an uncomfortable read at times I would certainly recommend.it.
Thank you Netgalley and Thread Books for giving me the opportunity to give my unbiased opinion.

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This was a fascinating story - albeit one sided but it made sense. There were some harrowing details included and the unwinding as the daughter takes on her own life. Really fascinating.

I do hope as a society we have come on further to identify this, but not sure.

A really interesting read.

I was given an advance copy by netgalley and the publishers but the review is entirely my own.

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A heart stopping tale of one woman’s journey of discovery through life and after.

I have had to stop and take a breath whilst reading this book more times than I care to count as I had trouble comprehending how Helen managed to stay sane.

She is brave and I have so much admiration for her strength.

I imagine it was very cathartic to write this book and I can’t recommend it highly enough.

Highly recommended 5 stars from me

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I don't know what it is about Munchausen's but I just have this morbid curiosity about it. So when I saw this non fiction book on netgalley, an actual true story of what it's like to grow up with a mother who has this condition, I had to read it!

And it was a really fascinating albeit sad read. Helen Naylor explains what her childhood was like growing up with what she thought was 2 disabled parents. It had a huge impact on her childhood and personality and after her father passed away her mother continued to keep up her pretence of having ME and then Parkinson's, impacting Helen's life with her husband and two children.

Some of the stuff that Helen's mother did was truly awful. It wasn't just that she tried to convince everyone she had ME, it was the way she behaved with Helen throughout her whole life. Never supporting her or listening to her opinions, trying to control her and make her feel guilty for living her life.

It really got me thinking about how much of it was Munchausen's and a personality disorder and what Helen's mother would be like if she had been diagnosed and received correct treatment. This book is yet another book that shines a light on the lack of support availability for the rarer mental health conditions.

An eye opening read and certainly one I'd recommend if you're interested in the subject matter.

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•~Book Review~•

TW : Child abuse, Narcissism, Compulsive lying and Manipulation

My Mother, Munchausen's and Me is a painfully shocking memoir written by Helen Naylor that brings out to the open the shocking secrets of her mother's that creates a big rift in Helen's life.
She talks about her difficult childhood, the abuses she went through in the hands of her mother.
Helen growing up believed her mother Elinor to be this flawless, beautiful, kind-hearted, disabled woman who was her bestfriend and loved her with her own life, only to grow up and realise, it all was a big fat lie.
As any abused person, she too was enmeshed so badly into her mother manipulation and lies, she would come up with excuses to be in denial that her mother never cared for or loved her.
It breaks her heart and takes away her childhood memories and she doubts everything, if they were ever real or fabricated.
She is torn between being a loving daughter inspite of being manipulated and taking care and focus on her family as Elinor desperately trys and clings on to various methods to bring the attention back on herself thus harming and playing everyone of her family.
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I felt so much for Helen. I was at awe, wondering how could a mother do this to her own child? How can she be so self-absorbed ? How can she gaslight and manipulate her own child?
I really impacted me negatively so much so I had to stop reading it at times.
My heart goes out to Naylor.

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