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This Is How Your Marriage Ends

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Member Reviews

This is a book about marriage that speaks to men in language they will understand - for better and for worse. I found the approach refreshing and grating at the same time as it seemed bro-ey during some passages but direct and clear in others. The central argument about loss of trust is one everyone should pay attention to.

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Compliments to Matthew Fray for making a hard topic easy to read. The only nitpick I have is this could've been trimmed with editing to minimize a lot of the repeats going on in here.

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This one was pretty good. Definitely helpful advice. It was fairly repetitive but I think it’s helpful when self help books reinforce the important points. I’ve never read this author’s blog but I will definitely look it up. I think this author had good advice that makes you think about your own relationship. Huge thank you to the publisher and Netgalley for allowing me to read and review this book!

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I'm familiar with this author from his viral articles and this book is a full-length expansion of the concepts he discussed--namely how things that seem minor, done by "good people" can slowly, but irrevocably, kill a marriage. The author doesn't pull any punches, either for himself or his readers (the anecdote about the worst thing he's ever done will make your hair curl) but his honesty does give him credibility.

The core concepts of his basic thesis about relationship breakdown, namely that invalidation and misplaced priorities will poison a marriage over time, are clearly explained and illustrated. It may go on a bit, but sometimes people need repetition or alternate examples for concepts to sink in, so that's forgivable. I would have liked a clearer sum-up, and maybe a comprehensive action plan in one place, but there is much to be gleaned from reading this.

Many thanks to the publisher and NetGalley for the opportunity to read and review!

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If you are married, thinking of marriage, or divorced and are able to create space for reflection and accountability, this book is for you! Matthew Fray uses his own divorce as a catalyst for illustrating how a marriage can end and what the readers should be aware of and consider in order to avoid patterns that often lead to divorce. In addition to his own experience, Matthew Fray incorporates stories from his clients, offering the reader relatability and a deeper context.

I enjoyed the levity of Matthew’s humor and the scientific research that validates his perspective. Not only will you learn how to have a successful marriage but also learn more of who you are, the characteristics that you have, and the thoughts that you perpetuate.

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Good people can be bad at relationships. Matthew Fray knows this first hand, after his article "She Divorced Me Because I left the Dishes by the Sink" went viral following his divorce. Now a relationship coach and blogger, Fray explains how good intentions can cause us to hurt our partners and shows how to break the cycle of dysfunction in your marriage. 

This is How Your Marriage Ends spends most of the book repeating the same lesson over and over in as many ways as possible - by not having empathy, you unintentionally hurt your spouse and then invalidate their experience, breaking their trust and straining the relationship. Fray's book serves his target audience (good men who are bad husbands) well, beating them over the head with his central message. However, the constant repetition drove me crazy and Fray's sense of humor wasn't my style.

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Matthew Fray's "This is How Your Marriage Ends" is an inspiring and challenging book that will be a catalyst for change for anyone seeking to have healthy, honesty, and connective relationships. An excellent read!

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I've never heard of the author or read his viral blog, but he has a way of straight talking about hard issues. The book is pretty repetitive, which was at times irritating, but I suppose the only way to get through to some people is by repeating the same information over and over and over. He has taken a bad situation (his own failed marriage) and turned it into an opportunity to help others from repeating his mistakes, which is admirable. The information isn't earth-shattering, but the mundane things that most people fail to realize are so important. I would say this is a must-read for anyone considering marriage.

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