I thought this was a really interesting read, and really made me think about how society has changed over the years.

Thank you NetGalley for my complimentary copy in return for my honest review.

This was an interesting read with an interesting concept. The form of the book I was reading made it a bit difficult to follow some of the data was presented, but it was an enlightening read. I do wish that there had been more examples of how this played out in real life rather than just notes from studies.

This book summarizes modern intimacy-related research, centered on technology. Its release is timely with recent experiences of "intimacy famine," but don't expect creative solutions to lockdown loneliness—the framing is "post-COVID." While tips are offered at the end of each chapter, there's nothing revolutionary.

If you're interested in the research, you’ll find the book well-written and learn about studies on relationship and technology topics through key life stages like media use and children's attachment, friendship under constant phone use, online dating, marital sexual satisfaction, and aging lonely. Drouin presents tech as more solution than problem, while offering tips for healthy use.

I was hoping for more on revamping intimacy beyond research on traditional family models. Straight, monogamous people are centered with nothing on chosen family, intentional communities, or identity-based networks. Several studies might suggest alternate interpretations that I pulled from my experience as queer, polyamorous, and on the asexual spectrum. It’s always important to consider how an author's culture and experiences inform conclusions. I would place more blame on tech companies and more emphasis on systemic factors. While Drouin’s conclusions are reasonable from one angle, social context matters. CEOs limiting their kids' screen time, for example, doesn't erase their blame in pursuing profit over human welfare.

I did learn interesting social theories. For example, social approval as a protection against loss of close family (a common queer experience!) seems misapplied to strangers online. Though I wanted deeper theories on intimacy and attraction, self-perception theory (it's hard to actually evaluate how we feel about someone) is relatable and relevant to defining "romantic attraction." How our needs for love and belonging "expand to fill" our social spaces seems very relevant to social media. I also appreciated the connection between diverse meaningful social connections, mental health, and aging.

A really fascinating read!

Especially during COVID, I was interested in intimacy and how humans respond to a lack of it in life. This book presented some interesting facts I did not know about before.

Thank you to the publisher and to NetGalley for this ARC in exchange for an honest review.

I devoured Out Of Touch in one day,
I feel an alternate title could be “How To Survive Being Human” (in a changing world of technological takeovers, AI advances, aging, eroding personal relationships, etc.), taken from the author’s helpful bullet-pointed chapter directives.
I took copious digital notes as I read, feeling like each data point is something I need to remember as we go through rapidly changing digital and cultural post-pandemic times - and as I age further into middle-age.
However, as much as this book seeks to serve as a hopeful guide into a rather bleak-seeming future for humanity, I cannot say that I came away feeling optimistic for having the tips.
Technology might be valuable beyond imagination for utility in many arenas of life but not for being a lonely person
needing love, intimacy, and connection. Here we have failed, and despite the author’s directive tips I suspect we will continue to do so..
The robots might just have to save us. Not that humans will have any choice.
Thanks to MIT Press and NetGalley for this compelling read.

A useful book in a tech-dominant society. Easy to read, plenty of examples. Plenty of suggestions. Thanks to NetGalley for a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review

"Out of Touch" is a non-fiction book about technology and our social and intimate relationships. The book covers different areas of life such as childhood, dating, marriage, and ageing. A chapter is als specifically devoted to "surviving a pandemic". The author is a psychologist and expert on the role of technology in relationships.

I was really curious about this book because of its relevance to our current lives. Many of the things the author addresses in the chapter on the pandemic have been on my mind as well, such as how this lack of physical closeness will affect my kid or myself.

Also, the book considers many of the technological advances that already impact our lives and those that may soon become commonplace (such as the development of AI). It was interesting to read, and to price together information that we usually only get piece by piece in the news. Take for instance kids' screen time: One study may say it's bad, another may say it's not harmful in small doses... Having an expert put all of the information into context is valuable.

The bok has nice summaries after each section that contain advice and take-aways. So, you could return to the book and look through these summaries again when needed.

All in all, this was an interesting read and there were a few tips that were quite helpful for me personally. The book is accessible and relevant to us today.

not really adding anything new, but a nice refresher! People who don't know much about this area will probably love it

Out of Touch is the first full-length book from prolific psychology researcher and Psychology Today contributor, Michelle Drouin. Drouin is a professor who teaches and writes about sex, relationships, infidelity, and how technology has been integrated into our connections. All topics that I love reading about, but this just really missed the mark for me.

Although this wasn’t for me, I think a newer nonfiction reader or someone who’s seeking a light, broad strokes overview of contemporary research on relationships and technology would enjoy this.

Things I liked:
-The topic: intimacy, loneliness, and how changing technology affects the quality of our relationships.
-The summary “survival tips” at the end of each chapter.
-I really appreciated how this author doesn’t just blame technology and social media for all of the world’s problems. She offers a balanced perspective on how technology has expanded our social networks and communication abilities to advance knowledge and connection. Drouin maintains that it’s not simply the presence of technology that degrades our relationships or lives, but how we choose to use it, which is something I firmly agree with.

Things I didn’t like:
-This book was very heterocentric. I get that most social psychology research on relationships is done with heterosexual pairings. But for a book about intimacy and technology use, two GIANT academic topics that same sex and queer couples contribute a lot to because they have had to derive their own script for, this book was sorely lacking for a queer perspective. Not even a mention or acknowledgement.
-I sensed factual errors and oversimplification of the cited research throughout. The author kind of lost me in the opening chapter when she referred to 18-24 year olds as millennials, but that was just one small example. These types of things don’t phase me in everyday conversation or when I’m reading internet articles, but for a deep dive nonfiction read, accuracy and nuance is important to me.
-This felt like a mish-mash of current research on relationships and technology use, which was interesting, but didn’t really tie it back to the theme of an “intimacy famine.” I’m not even sure the author defined intimacy famine anywhere in the book. If this was a paper I was grading, I would say the content of the book didn’t do anything to demonstrate the thesis.

Out of Touch is a book that aims to discuss intimacy in its; myriad of forms, in todays digitally dependent world. It is quite a formal book framed by multiple studies and a multitude of facts figures and numbers. The authors own experiences as a psychologist bring it all together. To be honest I found some of it interesting, especially the chapter on marriage, but most of it was the information rather than a discussion of how to make things better. It wasn't hooked, and don't really feel as though I learnt anything new. but some people may find this book useful. It makes everything relevant to the after effects of the pandemic which may be really helpful to some people.