This new novel from Natalia Sylvester was on my short list of most anticipated reads for 2022, and I was so thrilled to get an advanced copy that I abandoned my current reads to soak this one up. I was not disappointed! Part coming of age story, part romance, this book is a true gift to YA readers, with authentic Latinx disability rep and deep emotional resonance. And did I mention there are mermaids?

It is the summer before Verónica’s senior year of high school and she dreams of performing at the Mermaid Cove, an underwater tourist attraction in her Florida town. She had undergone numerous surgeries to manage her hip dysplasia, and swimming acts not only as a form of physical therapy but of respite and creative expression. Vero’s strict Peruvian parents, however, do not approve of her mermaid obsession, nor of Alex, the cute boy who has moved into their apartment complex. And when a doctor appointment reveals medical information that Verónica’s parents have been keeping from her, her world flips upside down.

“Breathe and Count Back from Ten” knocked me back when it opened with the dictionary’s definition of anesthesia (“a controlled, temporary loss of sensation or pain induced for medical purposes”), contrasted with the main character’s personal definition (“a dreamless state; a nothingness in which you have no control”). She then draws parallels between going under anesthesia and being underwater. Each chapter, in fact, begins with definitions of a significant word (sometimes English, sometimes Spanish) from Vero’s journal. I loved this device as a way to introduce each chapter because it gives the reader a unique point of entry into Verónica’s mind. And we get to explore the power of writing, as she re-defines words.

Dualities around autonomy and culture are beautifully woven through the entire novel and are especially highlighted in the scenes with Verónica’s parents. I loved the complex family dynamics and how each of the characters in the family were written with such specificity. I also appreciated how the bilingual dialogue was so fluid and how the author weaved both Inca and European mermaid stories into this novel. And all of the underwater scenes are written in such a detailed, evocative way!

I should add that I loved the romantic storyline for its sweetness and honesty but also appreciated that it was not the central focus of the novel. Alex (the love interest) enters her world with his own issues, which are discussed in an open and refreshing manner.

While this book is written for young people, I’d also highly recommend this book to parents of disabled and chronically ill children. There are so many elements of Verónica’s experience for me to reflect on and remember as my own child grows up. I was particularly struck by scenes that showed parent/child dynamics during medical appointments and as well as the passages that talked about early medical procedures that were vaguely discussed and information about Verónica’s body that was hidden from her. And I just about had to put down my book and clap when the author got into platitudes and the ever-pervasive “warrior” rhetoric. “I don’t want my scars to be seen as beautiful, or ugly, or strange or badass. I just want them to be allowed to be.”

In a word, phenomenal. I am so grateful for this beautiful book.

I was so excited to read this, mermaids in a not fantasy setting. I like the characters. The way they are described and how they fit into the story of this family. The way previous events still influenced the current time and current relationships made it so realistic.
At first I felt like the mermaid job was disappointing me a bit, but thankfully the story around it picked up and it became much better.
Verónica's parent were really killing me with their attitude, like they were actually making me angry.
Alex was so sweet and I love how he made the story not just about Verónica and the difficulties she was going through. Thr story showed that everyone is struggling with something.
Some parts of the book were a little too predictable to me though, that is why I gave it four stars.

I really enjoyed this book. The struggles of an immigrant teenager trying to fit into a world with over-protective parents and ongoing medical issues were so well described. The mermaid story was a delightful addition. Loved it.

Loved reading the disability rep (Verónica has hip dysplasia) and how it unpacked both pride and pain throughout the story. It really leant into the themes of body autonomy too, not just Verónica feeling like she had no choice with her medical treatments and decisions, but also in how her Peruvian immigrant parents didn't listen to her emotional needs and shamed her if she was ever around a boy, etc. It was very much a story about learning to listen to your body and trust yourself. And also live your mermaid dreams.

I wanted more from the romance though, since Alex was maybe in 1/4 of the book (I loved the chapter where he talked about his depression) and I hoped Verónica would also do some self-reflection on how she was solely focused on her problems and no one else's. Alex kind of bared his soul about the depression and the book was all like "good to know" and we never spoke of it again. Sir!! He supported her so wholly but it wasn't reciprocated. Verónica also shut down anyone who even suggested they struggled in life as well - it really was the oppression olympics with her, and while she at least apologised to Dani, I felt it would've been nice if at any point in the book Verónica had done something for someone else too.

6 reasons to read Breathe And Count Back From Ten!

A book about a girl with hip dysplasia, trying to deal with life with her disability, while also trying to manage her relationship parents, the new boy in her apartment building, and her dream of becoming a professional mermaid. It sounded like such an incredible coming of age story, with a tinge of romance, and I was very eager to see what I thought of it!

1. A fantastic main character - Verónica is trying to figure out who she is, and her place in the world. Her life doesn't look like what she wishes it so desperately it does. Her body is imperfect, her parents are too strict, and it feels as if she is stuck in a realm of not knowing enough about herself. Everything about her felt so strongly portrayed. She felt like a whole person. Messy, authentic, real. I fell in love with her.

2. OwnVoices disability rep - Verónica has hip dysplasia, as well as the author! I can't comment on this since I do not have it myself, but I really, really loved seeing Verónica navigate this portion of her life. It is a part of her, but it is not all of her. The conversations regarding her body and pain and scars were so, so incredible to see, and just downright wonderful.

3. Messy family relationships - Verónica struggles with her relationship with her parents. They are overprotective, and she yearns for more freedom. But there is such a current of love running underneath every action. They're trying to love each other, and they're trying to find a way to do that that works for everybody. I ended up loving all of them.

4. A weirdo sister - Dani was hilarious. I completely adored her, and I loved how she seemed to be her own, complete person as well. There were things she struggled with, and she felt so fully real because of it.

5. A sweet love interest - I did not think I would like Alex as much as I did. But, he's a guy who loves maps, struggles with depression but is working to manage it, and is so supportive of what Verónica wants to do.

6. Stories on stories - Creating your own story, finding your own story, learning what story you want to tell. This part of the book was so incredibly well written that it was breathtaking.

Overall, I really enjoyed this book! It had such strong characters, and felt incredibly authentic in everything that it did. It is a very good book.

The first thing that caught my eye was the cover, I thought it would be a fantasy which I’m a big fan of, but it is not. However, despite it not being a fantasy, I was not disappointed! The title is also intriguing, it poses questions for the reader from the start, why are they counting back from ten, who is counting back from ten?

The entire book was emotional. From the start I felt for Verónica as her parents are really strict, now I couldn’t relate to having very strict parents so the main character having strict parents made me mad at them. I hoped that them being strict and dislikeable characters was a great addition to the book though as it added more to the plot. They hid important information from Verónica – life changing information, things that would have changed the way she lives her life or wants to live her life. They want what is best for her but won’t let her be fully happy because they won’t let her chase her dreams.

The main character has hip dysplasia, and it was one of the most important factors in the book. The book revolves around Verónica and her hip, in my opinion this is important to have disability representation in books and this book does just that. Furthermore, it is based off the authors own hip dysplasia, the own voices aspect of this makes the book even better, knowing the author put so much of themself into the book.

Some of the things that happened prior to the beginning of the book make it even more interesting and we get to learn more about the characters.

There is one part in the book where ‘Florida Man’ is mentioned and it made me laugh because Florida Man headlines in news are always interesting to see, and because this book is based in Florida is made me laugh more.

I enjoyed seeing the characters relationships develop throughout the book, especially between Veró and Alex.

The ending is a bit ‘happily ever after’ but it still keeps you in a bit of mystery as to what is happening next? Despite this, I do think characters deserve happily ever afters, however knowing what challenges lie ahead for Verónica, is it really a happily ever after?

This was an emotional coming of age novel, with disability representation, young love and chasing your dreams and doing whatever it takes to reach them, and I am giving it 4 stars!

Wonderful addition to the YA Contemporary genre, with authentic representation for Peruvian culture and physical disability. Really glad to see this story being told, so that more people who identify with main character Verónica can relate and feel seen and less alone.

Oh wow, what a special book! I absolutely adored this. We follow Veronica as she becomes a performing mermaid and learns how to be a young adult. I learned about hip dysplasia, which I hope was well represented. The plot was compelling and it was just a really sweet and empowering young adult book. I will definitely read more by this author. I loved it.

On the surface, a mermaid book but with more digging, a book focusing on the importance of disability equality in society. A beautiful, heart breaking story.

*Thank you to Harper Collins,Natalia Sylvester and Netgalley for providing me with a E-ARC of "Breathe and Count Backwards From Ten" in exchange for an honest review *

Oh my gosh, I loved this! Not is this a book about Mermaid but disability representation as well! (Always excited to see it) Since the author shares Hip Dysplasia with Vera, I felt like it was very well explained so that people that aren't as familiar could understand. I also can appreciate that family dynamic as well, both of her parents putting pressure on Vera and not letting her be who she wants to be. Would definitely recommend this!

This was a real breath of fresh air.
Sylvester beautifully depicts so many things- with viscerally real descriptions of mental health, self-acceptance, found family, as well as self-discovery.
The clear love of swimming and the magic of the mermaids is so perfectly told it feels real, and is something new and distinctly summery that I love to see in YA.
Most strikingly for me, though, was how refreshing it felt to have a young female character who is not afraid to take what she wants. Who is not afraid of her own sexuality and desires, and despite her own upbringing, is not afraid of any shame or stigma. That, more than anything, is what stuck with me here.

(Thank you to NetGalley and the publishers for this eARC!)

“To this day, I don’t know how I didn’t scream. Maybe I was just used to it by then, this idea that pain is meant to be endured quietly.”

It’s so unbelievably rare to see illness and/or disability at the forefront of any stories, in any form of media, because disability is not desirable, only - to some, not all - pitiable.

Disabled representation is oftentimes forgotten on the sole basis that the world, or at least a large portion of it, aren’t willing to hear our voices or let our disabilities be a core part of the story, because they don’t want to see us as anything other than just our disability.

As a fellow disabled, OwnVoices (as of yet, unpublished) author, whenever I walk into reading a book about disability, I tend to find myself holding my breath. There are so very many things that could go wrong, and be done wrong.

Breathe and Count Back from Ten put my worries and fears about how the topic of disability would be handled to bed, tucked it in tightly and gave it a sweet kiss on the forehead.

To say it was good would be a criminal understatement. In all honesty, I don’t think there’s a strong enough word to express my profound, deep love for this book and the story within.

While I don’t have hip dysplasia, I do have chronic hip dislocations and subluxations that have affected my day-to-day living exponentially.

Much like Veroníca, my most problem hip is my left. When I went into this book, I really expected that our problem hips - and the fact that we both had hip issues in the first place - to be the only thing I felt truly, deeply connected to. I couldn’t have been more wrong.

There were several times that I felt knocked back, because it was as if I was reading something out of my diary.

It felt so raw, real and personal, a lot of the time, it didn’t feel like I was reading a book; that these people were only fictional - it felt like I was reading someone’s diary, watching it alongside them, seeing their lived experiences unfold before my very eyes, which is a total testament to Natalia Sylvester’s utterly beautiful and gripping writing and her own personal story with hip dysplasia.

Sylvester’s ability to capture the hardships and fear that comes with disability and chronic pain, while also framing a picture of the poignancy and beauty that can also come with it is nothing short of magical. It was as if someone walked into my head, took my thoughts and my feelings, then put them into a book.

Breathe and Count Back from Ten is a deeply profound love letter to the disabled community, and how beautifully written that letter is.

There wasn’t a single moment that I didn’t enjoy of this novel. I found myself holding my breath, laughing, smiling, crying. It was truly a joyous experience.

Suffice to say, I give it a 5/5 stars - and if I could give it more, I would. I have found a brand new addition to my favourite books list.

Thank you to Natalia and her publisher for allowing me the opportunity to read this book as an ARC in exchange for my honest review. Reading this book was a deeply moving, beautiful, endearing and personal experience that has helped me understand the feelings that I couldn’t quite comprehend in regards to my disabilities, and especially my hip problems. I feel very honoured to have been given the opportunity to read this book and have it touch me in the way that it has, so from the bottom of my heart: thank you.

Have you dreamed of becoming a mermaid? Then, this book is for you! A Peruvian-American teen, Veronica, shares her experiences with hip dysplasia, finding herself, family life, and auditioning to be a professional mermaid! @NetGalley #TexasAuthors

A beautifully breathtaking coming of age story. Have you ever seen parts of yourself being reflected in a book? I am Peruvian, just like the main character, and seeing so much of my identity and culture reflected on pages as a main character brought tears to my eyes.

This story is about the desires and longings we have as first generation immigrants and the struggle of being bicultural and trying to be accepted. Like Veronica, sometimes we hold back what we truly want to do because sometimes those wants are not worth our parents sacrifices. There's this line we eventually have to draw because at some point we live for them and not ourselves. There is so much guilt sometimes in wanting what we want because our parents sacrificed so much and want more of us that we don't want to let them down. Natalia was able to capture this in a way that hooked me and didnt let me go.

The author drew from her experiences being born and living with hip dysplasia into this story. Veronica was born with hip dysplasia and throughout the book you see Veronica battle between what her parents want and what she wants and feels is right for her body. There are a few scenes in the book that also serve as a gentle call in.

Natalia also weaves in romance between Veronica and Alex that is so, so tender. I would love to read a book about Alex.

The Peruvian legend that Natalia incorporated into this book was fascinating. I hope you read up on it some more after you're done reading this book.

This was honestly an amazing read and will be one of my favorites for 2022.

5/5 stars. To be released May 2022.

This was a wonderful contemporary novel. I was immediately drawn to it since the main character, Verónica, has a goal of becoming a mermaid at a local attraction. I mean, who hasn't wanted to become a real life mermaid? The blurb describes this as an "authentic" novel and it truly was. Verónica has hip dysplasia just like the author of this book, Natalia Sylvester. Verónica struggles with acceptance of her own body, navigating choppy waters with her overbearing and strict parents, all why trying to be who she truly is - and for everyone to see her true self as well. I loved every moment of this book.

I'm so glad that I had the chance to read an early copy of this book! As a Peruvian American, I love reading work by Peruvian authors. I'm a fan of both the author's adult and YA backlist novels, but I unfortunately didn't enjoy this one as much. I found myself very frustrated with the main character's father for a majority of the book. Other than that, I enjoyed the mermaid stuff—so fun!

This teen/YA novel tells the story of a young girl who has always had a connection with the ocean and dreamed of mermaids. Born in Peru, Veronica is very much the daughter of immigrants who have very firm beliefs about how she should behave, what she should do and where she can go, but at 17 she is beginning to test those boundaries and resent her parents for their controlling nature. During the summer before senior year, several opportunities to test these boundaries come her way including: auditions to be part of a mermaid performance group, medical-related decisions and a cute boy who just moved in near by! It’s great to see more books feature diverse characters while still meeting all of the critical YA elements of a coming of age story full of attraction, risk and growing pains. It was a pleasure to read an advance copy of this book through Netgalley and the publisher! If you’re looking for a new YA book definitely add this one to your list!

I am obsessed with all things mermaid so this book was a must read for me, and it did not disappoint. On a serious note, there are so many beautiful and positive messages within the pages of this compelling story. A heartwarming message about identity, along with the realisation that we are the ones in control of it. The way Verónica’s ideas about place, gender and her hip dysplasia tie into her identity and help shape her as a young woman provide real food-for-thought for any young minds reading this novel. For anyone who sees this as a simple coming of age romcom, there is so much more to explore: family relationships, sibling loyalty, body image, rewriting stories, ownership, the list goes on. I will be recommending this book once it is published to inspire the students in my classroom.

I got about 50% of the way, and it just isn't the right time for me to read this one. It's like sometimes you think you want to watch a rom-com, but nope. It's just not doing it for you, and you decide to watch a documentary instead. That was me and Breathe and Count Back from Ten.

I should be all over this story because it has things I love in YA:
- Diverse protagonist (Latina)
- Immigrant family/experience
- Mermaids!
- Semi-invisible disability (hip dysplasia)
- Overcoming shame from scars (show them off loud and proud!)
- Working through conservative parental POV about sexuality and being a teen girl who has hormones
- Cutie new guy who just moved in
- Promoting an atypical sport (swimming)

I may come back to this if it speaks to me, but I sat at 30% for more than a week, and now I've been sitting at 50% for at least five days.

THIS. BOOK. WAS. AMAZING. As someone who also has had several orthopedic surgeries throughout the years, I so related to Verónica's struggle and the fear of another surgery. What I loved the most is that Vero's different identities are deftly weaved together and intersect rather than being just a diversity checklist. She is disabled AND Peruvian AND an immigrant AND a woman. The mermaid scenes were absolutely breathtaking and now I want nothing more than to be a mermaid. I've been excited for this book and following Natalia's writing and publishing process for a long time and I'm so, so happy I got the privilege of reading this ARC.