This was a DNF for me at 20%. I set it down and picked it up multiple times, but I just couldn't get into it.

Actual rating 4.5/5 stars.

"She once told me when you say you’re going to tell people a horror story, they sit up in their chairs defensively, waiting to see you fail. When you tell them it’s a love story, they relax, they open themselves wide. Macey used to write horror stories she sold as love stories. She took a certain pleasure in seeing her audience find themselves out of their depth.

When I say this is a love story, I mean this is a story about someone who believed in something impossible and beautiful and dangerous with such strength of character and devotion that they followed the thread of it all the way to the very end, no matter what the world threw at them.
Whichever way to you try to tell it, that sounds like a love story to me."

I loved the tone in which this story was narrated. The voice was profound and poetic, yet also casual and conversational. Moments of illumination and clarity about the world around both narrator and reader were delivered alongside interaction between the individual who voiced it and characters that appeared offstage. We were directly referred to, as were they and their insights were welcomed as though we were all seated together and listening to this tale read aloud. And what a truly unsettling one it quickly proved to be!

Solid horror novella with a reasonable idea: a virus that makes the infected incapable of seeing the world as it is so that about half the population effectively falls prey to the delusion that there’s a zombie apocalypse. (Or do they?)

TW: suicide, gore

*****SPOILERS*****
About the book:In a world reeling from an unusual plague, monsters lurk in the streets while terrified survivors arm themselves and roam the countryside in packs. Or perhaps something very different is happening. When a disease affects how reality is perceived, it’s hard to be certain of anything…

Spence is one of the “cured” living at the Ironside rehabilitation facility. Haunted by guilt, he refuses to face the changed world until a new inmate challenges him to help her find her old crew. But if he can’t tell the truth from the lies, how will he know if he has earned the redemption he dreams of? How will he know he hasn’t just made things worse?
Release Date: April 12th, 2022
Genre: Horror
Pages: 167
Rating: ⭐️⭐️

What I Liked:
1. The writing style was good
2. The story flowed
3. I love the cover
4. I appreciate what the story was about

What I Didn't Like:
1. A lot of filler government talks
2. Lots of ramblings

Overall Thoughts: “It’s only that I don’t trust dreams. I don’t think it’s fair they don’t really mean anything.”

I felt like this story starts off very strong. I was sucked into wanting to know what was happening. The characters felt very interesting to me. Where the book started to get weak for me was all the social commentary that went with it. Once Spence leaves Ironside all you get is endless paragraphs about the government and how they are self serving. While this is definitely true I felt like I was reading a book that was trying to sell me on something rather than a creepy horror novella about “zombies”.

The writing style had me hooked from the first line. Though I must confess I felt as though Spence was really a female. The writing of the character came off very feminine with him. I have to wonder if it was because he was able to secure a friendship with a suspicious women, Leila, and perhaps that doesn’t feel like that would be possible with a male in the role.

As the book continues on I felt like it turned into They Live from John Carpenter. The signs, the wake up, and the way the government is trying to control how people react.

It’s never really explained how one is infected other than that people listen to hysteria and it’s spread like that I guess. I suppose like people spearmint fake news via Facebook. I don’t know. I wish there was more context to that and less in your face about the government politics.

Final Thoughts: Honestly I don’t know what to think about this book. On one hand I get what the author was trying to do here and on the other I can’t help feel like the author was assuming that you’re sheep if you follow the rules. The book isn’t bad at all but it wasn’t great either. I get it - there is no one that is awake.

Recommend For:
• Dystopian elements
• Zombie vibes
• Mental health
• Government conspiracies

Thanks to Tor and Netgalley for this advanced copy of the book. All thoughts are my own

I really struggled with this book. I got about half way through and just could not continue. It's an interesting premise. What if the infection that was spreading across the country made those that were infected think that the uninfected were zombie like monsters? The problem I had was that I had zero connection to the characters and they just were not that engaging to me. The narrative went back and forth between the infected and noninfected and it became difficult to keep straight who's point of view you were reading about.
It was even brought up somewhere that old argument about whether the dress was blue or gold that went viral. The story could be seen from either point of view but the blue and gold argument got on my nerves when it was a "thing". This story similarly aggravated me.

This story plays on the unreliability of perspective - how one’s belief colors and, often, infects everything they encounter. It is a very sharp allegory for the current political climate in the West (specifically America, though the author is British and is probably commenting on something closer to home; but as I’m American, I’m seeing parallels to the MAGA crowd and other victims of dangerous groupthink).

When an entire group of people are suddenly convinced that another group (roughly half and half) has suddenly turned into violent monsters and the end times are upon them all, this human group obviously defends itself. But from the monsters’ perspective… there are no monsters, just a group of people suffering a shared belief that leads to violence and chaos. It was so clever and messy and familiar.

And then we got to the end, when our narrator Spence goes against what we have all been led to believe is right - and does it in a pretty toxic way - and we’re meant to accept it as some kind of “well, the other perspective isn’t WRONG per se; they just see things differently” and that just didn’t feel acceptable to me. There were some hints at “well, what we see could be just as much of a lie” but that isn’t explored and can’t weigh definitively one way or another.

Basically, the ending lacked decisiveness.

Terrifying! You'd think I'd be sick of reading pandemic fiction by now, in the middle of an on-going pandemic, but AND THEN I WOKE UP breathes new life into the premise. Contagion, monsters, and paranoia- these terrors are brought to life vividly with engaging storytelling, well drawn characters, and some very eerie set pieces. I enjoyed this a lot!

This book is like nothing I've read before, it's a sort of dystopian, zombie-apocalypse story that really delves into propaganda, and why we believe what is shown to us.

Initially I was quite confused, but once you get a bit further in it explains everything to you quite neatly and concisely. I think the voice of the narrator was really intriguing and interesting, they're definitely unreliable and cause you to think a lot about what's going on.

I'd have liked for there to have been more detail about minor characters, as it is quite a short book, but I also think the shortness of the book adds to the sense of uncertainty and unanswered questions that the book creates.

It's very thought-provoking and there are a lot of lines that sum up big questions really well. It isn't necessarily a favourite of mine but I enjoyed reading it and I think most people would be able to get something out of it.

3.5 stars out of 5

A plague that warps people’s perceptions of reality, turning people into monsters and sufferers into violent survivors. The main character has come through the sickness and has been at a recovery facility for a long time. When a friend sees someone she knows on the news, he accompanies her on a trip on search of her former survivor tribe.

As usual, Tordocom brings the content I need in my life, and I read this one in a single setting. It was a quick and intense read, and it took a classic dystopian/horror troupe and added a new flair with characters I wanted to know more about who were living in world we’ve kind of seen before but at the same time is wholly unique.

It’s out now wherever you get your books.

Who Are the Real Monsters?

And Then I Woke Up is a properly suspenseful and horrifying thriller. It's a quick read that could be easily translated for film or TV. Like Spence, even the characters who were featured only briefly were vivid and easy to care about. It's perfect for lovers of dystopian, horror-flavored scifi.

The story's ingredients will make a tasty meal for deep thinkers who like to more fully digest their fiction, as well. In an allegorical sense, the story is an examination of the lonely, isolated, and guilt-ridden existence we all endure at some time or another.

I've had occasions when the evidence of my own eyes tricked me instead of informing me of a reality I failed to see. It seems to be a common problem, even without the affliction of the book's plague.

I've never encountered people transformed into the monstrous, bloodthirsty creatures of And Then I Woke Up, but I've made more than a few snap judgments that led me astray. I can't help but view the condition which Spence must live with as a metaphor for those afflicted with dangerously misinformed beliefs that fuel our own present conflicts. If only there was a compassionate cure for our polarized society.

I appreciate how the author constructed the rehabilitation aspects of the story in such a sensitive and well-informed way. I don't want to comment further and create a spoiler.

Thanks to Malcolm Devlin, Tor, and NetGalley for giving me the opportunity to read And Then I Woke Up with a free advanced reader's copy. Without being compelled to in any way, I offer my own positive endorsement and enthusiastically recommend it!

Can't say I feel super strongly about this one, and that's part of the problem I guess. Interesting take on zombies, where people are essentially zombified by overdosing on negative news media. Unfortunately I found the plot fairly dull, the messaging to be very on-the-nose and the characters to be rather forgettable.

I requested this one because it might be an upcoming title I would like to review on my Youtube Channel. However, after reading the first several chapters I have determined that this book does not suit my tastes. So I decided to DNF this one.

Very unsure of how I feel about this.
On the one hand I want to give it all the stars for having some super interesting points on a whole bunch of shit, including but not limited to the concept of civilisation and societal norms, etc. On the other hand I feel like maybe it was a little too intellectual for me? Don’t get me wrong- I love to pretend I’m an intellectual being but when it comes down to understanding and analysing certain things I become a bit of a deer in headlights. Maybe using more time to elaborate on these points might’ve helped, since the book is quite short and feels like the written equivalent of a collage.

The feeling of different stories and perspectives pieced together does lend itself to the narrative style- the glue holding everything together being the main character reflecting upon his past, talking directly to the reader, in what feels like an AA meeting for ex-infectees. Definitely a vibe I haven’t experienced before in any book I’ve read and whilst it wasn’t my favourite writing style, I do praise the uniqueness.

All in all, an interesting mix of horror and magical realism (although I’d say slightly lacking in the horror department imo) worth sinking your teeth into, especially if you have the big brain energy to truly think about what’s being said!

Yes yes yes.

This book is so smart. Wow. What a clever way of discussing how we consume the world around us and what we chose to believe. Honestly, as a fan of zombie stories, this was one of the most fascinating, smart zombie stories I've ever read, and I know I'll keep thinking about it for a long time.

If you like horror stories that make a strong critique on modern society this one is definitely for you.

4.5 stars because honestly I just needed to be in this world for so much longer.

Book:And Then I Wake Up
Author: Malcom Devlin
Rating:⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️/5

Review ~
Then I Woke Up is a novella about an uprise in an illness of zombies that became a plaque. This reminded me of the show the walking dead if you enjoy that show this book is for you! Although this book was about a dream it still was very good and a quick read.

Overall while I was reading this book I took part of it as a psychological part because of them Turing a dream into reality. This book was very interesting and definitely a good read!

“…And then I woke up.” These are the words that nearly every reader dreads to hear at the end of a story, suggesting as they do that the characters and situations the reader has just gotten attached to have been nothing more than a dream. But how about at the start of the story? Malcolm Devlin’s latest horror novel, And Then I Woke Up, explores the struggles of characters who have just awakened from an imagined reality and must reckon with their new understanding of the world and the consequences of actions they committed while living under a lie. The book, which came out last month, is the most unique take on a zombie apocalypse I have ever read and has a particularly poignant message for our times.

Spence was once one of the infected—not infected with any recognizable disease or condition, but with a narrative. On the day that the world ended, Spence and many others like him experienced a collective delusion that they were suddenly living through a zombie apocalypse. This belief distorted their perception of the world around them: they saw undead, shambling corpses where their friends and loved ones had stood a moment before and were simply unable to perceive anything that would contradict the story that had begun to form in their minds. Led by charismatic “believers” whose fervor helped to drive and define the narrative, bands of survivors fought violently against these seeming zombies—in reality, attacking and killing innocent people. After years of living under this delusion and committing what he afterwards learned were atrocious crimes against his fellow human beings, Spence was cured—he broke free of the narrative and was able to see the world as it truly was again. Spence now lives at Ironside, a facility where the cured can find acceptance and start to process the destabilizing shifts in reality they’ve experienced and the horrible things they now realize they’ve done. Spence finds comfort in this environment, especially in the group therapy sessions, where each resident has the opportunity to tell and retell their story without judgment. But not everyone is happy about being cured. When Leila, Ironside’s newest resident, fails to make progress in her recovery, Spence reaches out to connect with her and eventually comes to understand why someone might be happier living a lie than accepting the truth.

Spence is a fascinating example of what is, in my mind, the most terrifying kind of unreliable narrator. He cannot trust his own perception or memories from the time he was infected. When reflecting on his past, Spence must sift through his memories, guessing at what parts were delusions fed to him by the narrative and trying to imagine what must really have happened that he couldn’t perceive at the time. Even after becoming cured, Spence’s trust in his own mind is shaken. He can’t help wondering whether his life at Ironside is just another narrative he’s created for himself. Philosophers and horror writers alike can attest that there’s real terror in the subjective experience of reality—how can you ever know what’s real? And if you can’t, how do you give anything in your life meaning?

Along with these epistemological meditations, And Then I Woke Up also seems to offer a pointed social commentary on today’s political climate. The novel plays with the concepts of “fake news,” conspiracy theories, and even seemingly innocuous viral controversies over differences in perception—making explicit reference to the blue-and-black vs white-and-gold dress phenomenon from a few years ago. News items become irreconcilably divisive and large swathes of the country are, in this case, living in completely different realities. The bands of “survivors” in Devlin’s novel are reminiscent of, for example, Pizzagate adherents who fervently believe they are fighting virtuously against a large-scale, government-facilitated child sex-trafficking ring. But Devlin also explores with sympathy why the certainty of a conspiracy might be more appealing than the messiness of the truth. And the novel suggests unique approaches for how to break individuals out of these false narratives without causing further violence.

If you like your zombie apocalypses with a side of deep, thought-provoking philosophy and ethics, I highly recommend picking up And Then I Woke Up!

This. Was. Epic.

I was very surprised by this and it was definitely not what I expected going on. What I thought would be a short horror zombie novella turned out to be a beautiful, thought provoking ode to the state of humanity. Rather than your typical flesh eating zombies killing every human in sight, this book focused on the real monsters: us.

Set in a world where the ‘infected’ are those who are made to believe there is a zombie invasion by the media narrative, our protagonist is recovering from his infection as a newly ‘cured’ member of society in a rehab facility of sorts. While fairly comfortable with his new life and identity and coming to terms with the realization that his previous life was somewhat of a life, he breaks out with a newer resident to hunt down her old companion. They begin a journey across the uninhabited land, discovering new facts and realities along the way.

This book is definitely a little confusing at first, i found myself exiting out to read the synopsis a couple times and reread multiple passages. But it’s very much one of those books that just begins to make sense if you stick around. I absolutely ADORED this.

5 ⭐️

And Then I Woke Up is the latest novel by Malcolm Devlin, though if I'm being honest, it is also the first novel I've read by this author. However, when I saw the pitch for this book, I knew I had to read it. Anytime you promise me a book that reads like a Mira Grant or Stephen Graham Jones novel, I'm there.

What would you do if you could no longer believe your world's perception? Would you consider the words of others, or would you go on trusting your flawed senses? This is a question countless people will have to answer as a new disease tears through the world.

Are those that believe monsters are accurate (and actively hunting) right, or are they sick? Can their world or perspective be trusted? Is the cure justified? Or is something more significant, something deeper, happening?

"I was, in my own mind, already a survivor. I was already used to looking out for myself and keeping away from the deep gravity wells of other people's trouble.”

Wow. And Then I Woke Up is a book that can quickly turn readers on their heads, making them question up from down and right from left. I am confident that this is the book's goal, and boy, does it succeed.

It also weighs somewhat heavily on the heart since much of the discourse is focused on contagious diseases and their perception of them. I adore that And Then I Woke Up opened the door for these conversations while still feeling the emotional toll they go hand-and-hand with.

And Then I Woke Up is both allegorical and thoughtful. It's designed to elicit an emotional response from the reader while also forcing them to sit down and think. I rather love that combination, though I've never experienced it in these measures before. That's part of the delight of And Then I Woke Up; it is so very different.

The horror elements are the icing on the cake or the zombie brain on the pavement. Whichever turn of phrase you prefer. Oddly enough, the more graphic elements of this novella help provide a grounding effect for everything else going on. A starting point for which everything follows.

So, having read And Then I Woke Up, does it live up to the promises made in the pitch? I would have to say yes! I'm going to be keeping an eye on Malcolm Devlin's works from here on out.

It's hard to review this book because it is enjoyed best when you go into it with as little information as possible. Yes, it's a horror novel, but it's as much about zombies as it is about false narratives, what we choose to believe, and how society best functions amidst a crisis. If you like books that break your brain, this one is for you.

Happy publication day to AND THEN I WOKE UP by Malcolm Devlin! And thank you to the author, @netgalley and @tordotcompub for the e-ARC.

I am still trying to sort out my feelings about this book. While this IS a post-apocalyptic story, it also appears to me to simply be a commentary on current events. However, that discussion would be full of spoilers.

So I leave you with this question in hopes it might intrigue you into reading:

What happens when the "disease" that causes the end of the world is a disease of influence and manipulation?

Well worth the read for the very unique disease premise alone. Don't go into this one expecting fast paced dystopian fighting. There is much more philosophy and pondering in this one.