I was given a copy of the She’s Unlikeable audiobook in exchange for my honest review.

Prior to reading She’s Unlikeable I was aware of Ms. Shewakramani from the show Indian Matchmaking on Netflix. Since it had been 2 years since I watched the show, I remembered her as a very strong and successful lawyer that didn’t have success on the show. This book walks through her experience on the show but also her life before and after the show.

This book is a memoir of her life and not a self help book. The book is written to revolve around an idea or a topic and not in chronological order of her life. There were multiple times through the book that I was impressed by the connections or points she was able to make. I was never lost during the book, however towards the end of the book I had trouble distinguishing where some events fit into her overall timeline.

Throughout the book Ms. Shewakramani focuses on how her upbringing in New York City and Houston with her Mother and sister developed her as a person. How college, a Semester at Sea and law school further opened her eyes to other cultures or norms outside of her own. And how these experiences played into her negative perception on Indian Matchmaking.

This overall was a great read. I enjoyed hear Ms. Shewakramani’s side of the story and her dialogue on being a successful woman on reality tv.

This is story behind Aparna, of Indian Matchmaking fame. She talks a bit about her time on the show, which was only two weeks, and about how she was depicted. She points out the issues she had with the matchmaker, the story behind the scenes in which she was painted as the villain, and the reality of her life and living with the fame she has found after the show.

I loved this. Aparna was very candid about what really was going on behind the scenes with the matchmaker, the dates, and her family. She talks about which men were not great and which she is now friends with. She talks about her career as a lawyer and what she is doing on. She also talks about the issue with reality TV where certain people are portrayed in a certain way to fit a narrative that may or may not accurate. I kind of loved this and it makes me like her a lot more.

I did this as an audiobook and didn't know anything about Aparna Shewakramani. For people that know about the Indian Matchmaker and about her, then I think it will be a good book for you!

I found it interesting to hear her perspective of what it was like to be on a reality show. The issues that she had while on the reality show and how she dealt with it. It was interesting to hear her trials that she was running into in her own life.

You have to remember that people that go onto reality shows put their life on hold and that is exactly what Aparna did in her life. I'm happy that she shared her life story with us.

Thank you to Dreamscape Media and NetGalley for an ARC of this audiobook in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are my own.
Aparna Shewakramani, a single woman from Houston, became a well known “unlikeable” cast member of the Netflix show Indian Matchmaking. This book is about her experience on the show, her sudden and unexpected “fame”, but more importantly who she really is as a person.
I did watch Indian Matchmaking on Netflix. First, I don’t believe you need to have seen the show in order to enjoy or find value in this story. Admittedly I was drawn to this book because I DID watch the show and was interested in hearing from Aparna because reality TV lacks actual reality either by some of the shows being scripted or by the editing process heavily influencing the narrative.
I wasn’t exposed to any of the negative feedback surrounding Aparna after I watched the show, so I was truly shocked people found her unlikeable. Sima, the matchmaker, had come across worse in my opinion. I loved that Aparna knew what she was looking for and didn’t want to settle or compromise when it came to her life partner. I can see how some of the editing wasn’t favorable, especially after finishing this book.
What I loved about this book, more than the insight to the show, was learning about Aparna. Honestly, what an impressive woman. I loved hearing about her South Asian culture, her travel adventures and her personal and professional accomplishments. I was also unaware of her medical diagnosis. Aparna is intelligent, insightful, determined, bold, classy and a great role model for, not just South Asian women, but all women. Through everything she is humble, appreciative and has stayed true to herself.
Since I listened to the audiobook, I would like to say how much I appreciate it when the author does the narrating. Thank you to Aparna for sharing her story.

As someone who strives to be liked, a people pleaser to an extreme, a peacekeeper in every sense of the word, I was not sure I’d be able to relate…and how wrong I was! The Aparna that we saw on the show was a static, 2D “villain” edit (as most ambitious career-oriented women seem to be portrayed on reality tv). The Aparna in this book was resilient in the face of racism, literal natural disasters, adventures gone awry, opportunistic people involved in the show, health problems, and financial risks.

Throughout the book, she has several hot takes and articulates her reasoning behind each very well. However, I *know* many of those opinions (ranging from experiencing racism, effects of colorism, defining arranged marriage, navigating fertility and the biological clock, the financial privilege of being in a relationship etc.) will be taken out of context. Whether or not you agree with her on each point is a separate conversation, but I admire her bravery in pointing out each issue and how she has personally formed her world view and faced each of these obstacles in her life.

I’ve said it a million times and I will continue to say it, we need more South Asian representation! I’ve read a few other south Asian memoirs but there’s a difference between reading about an A-list Bollywood actress at the Met Gala, and reading the memoir of an otherwise regular person who happened to go on a dating show. I found Aparna’s recollections and reflections on her identify to be SO RELATABLE, at times I felt like I could have written or told the same story…and that is extremely important for our community. The way she described not receiving affection from Indian guys because she didn’t meet the Indian beauty standard but then getting attention from non-desis for being “exotic”, how she felt like an outsider at a Nashville bar basically studying a new culture abroad, how aunties sized her up and judged her silently - I wanted to scream. YES! I want to continue to read more about things like this!! Brown girls need to know that what they are experiencing is not in isolation and they deserve to have actually relatable stories in the media they consume.

Like most others who will pick up this book, I watched Aparna on Indian Matchmaking and had very conflicting feelings. One one hand, some of her comments sounded harsh, but I suspected (and now know after she spills the behind the scenes tea) that they were taken out of context in order to create a cohesive storyline with her as the villain. She mentions that 1.5 hours of footage was used out of the 150 hours shot…and they didn’t capture the post-shooting dates where the *real* conversations happened.

Even with her “villainous” edit, I was perturbed by others’ reactions. When I read comments online about how difficult she was being, I was a bit surprised because I wondered why the same was not being said about the men on the show who stated their likes / dislikes. Looking for a life partner is not a blasé decision to be made…of course she has qualities she is seeking and wouldn’t want to be bull dozed into agreeing to marry somebody. As she described the experience, she was unapologetic about being opinionated…and that takes BRAVERY, to an extent that I honestly do not have (even writing reviews make me nervous haha). But I can understand why others want to “be like Aparna” and be encouraged to stick to their resolve. Women, especially brown women, are told from am early age to not make others uncomfortable, smile, and put others at ease. But it’s not an easy process to unlearn.

I really enjoyed reading about her journey to finding her own voice, and luckily it sounds like she was able to gain that independence and strength pretty early on. (I would’ve happily read a whole book only full of her semester at sea stories). But as someone who is still working on being more assertive and coming to terms with the fact that might make you seem unlikeable, Aparna’s story was a great source of inspiration! I would definitely recommend it!

I quickly binged “Indian Matchmaker” on Netflix and recalled Aparna as a standout character. In this book, it was interesting to see the behind-the-scenes reality of her filming experience in addition to the power of editing, which admittedly can be easy to forget sometimes. I appreciate her vulnerability in sharing her insecurities and real life adjustments after the show. It was a quick read, although a bit repetitive at times. 3.5 stars ⭐️. Thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for the advanced copy for review. I’m rooting for you, Aparna!

I immediately knew I had to read Aparna’s book when I saw it. No matter what your opinion is on Aparna, she was definitely unforgettable. I knew I would be in for a ride through the title: She’s Unlikeable: And Other Lies That Bring Women Down.

No surprise that this “docuseries” was more reality TV show than anything. It didn’t even register to me that this was a docuseries until I read She’s Unlikeable. This was Aparna’s chance to tell her perspective free from the dramatic editing of reality TV.

I truly believe Aparna’s depiction on the show was misrepresented. Every story needs a villain, and she made it really easy to turn into one. Especially in reality TV when our brains need to distinguish heroes and antagonists.

This book was Aparna’s chance to use her platform to clear her name and tell her perspective of things irrespective of the editors. I wasn’t surprised that this was the focus of a majority of the book, but I guess I was disappointed that there weren't more of the other things.

I loved having the glimpse inside of Aparna’s life that the cameras didn’t capture. She got to show us some of her life-changing experiences, some of her sorrow, and some of her aspirations. She had her chance to show us that she is a multidimensional person who loves and fears and dreams.

I felt like the depth was still lacking. This is understandable because of the barrage of hate she gets and the demands from so many strangers to have access to her life. This was her vulnerability in her own terms.

I think I also expected more connection to the experiences of women everywhere. What I mean by that is that I wanted more of how her experience connected to the concepts of racism and misogyny on a larger scale. But at the same time, she didn’t owe us that either.

The cool part of memoirs is that it’s a chance for people to share their stories on their own terms and attempt to make connections so people don’t feel so alone. They can choose to write their own narrative, choosing which parts of themselves they share.

All in all, Aparna’s voice is important. We need more role models to show us the importance of asserting our boundaries, telling our own stories, and being unapologetic about it.

Like many others, I got to know Aparna from her stint on the Netflix show, Indian Matchmaking. And while I didn’t watch the whole season, I was intrigued by Aparna, especially after reading all the articles and interviews she did after the show ended. The audiobook for She’s Unlikeable: And Other Lies That Bring Women Down, was more compelling as it was narrated by the author herself. The book does an excellent job of showing Aparna as not a reality star, but rather as an independent Indian woman who knows what she wants and won’t settle. Hearing her retell her own journey and her experiences with sexism, racism, colourism and racism both before and after appearing on the show actually made her feel more relatable. It’s a shame but not surprising to learn how the editors did her dirty on the show, and it’s nice to see that she’s able to move on from the experience and how it helped her embark on this new chapter in her life.

I absolutely loved Indian Matchnaking when I binge-watched it at the start of the pandemic, so when I saw that one of the shows stars, Aparna, had written a book, I knew I had to read it!
It wasn’t really until recently that I realized so much of “reality tv” is really scripted or heavily edited to steer the narrative in a certain direction. This became even more clear after listening to Aparnas side of the story, detailing the time leading up to the show, the filming process and the fallout after the show was released, portraying Aparna in a negative light and making her out to be the villain of the show.
Society has a way of really trying to break down strong women like Aparna, who was instilled with good values and a hard work ethic from her mother, resulting in Aparna being a successful lawyer with a love of travel who now has formed a successful luxury travel enterprise.
Highly enjoyed this audio copy, read by the author herself. Thanks to the publisher and Netgalley for the opportunity to review.

I eagerly anticipated this book. I enjoyed watching Indian Matchmaker on Netflix. Aparna was a standout on that show. I admired her independent spirit and recognized the obvious negative spin put on her, likely during editing. Would an Indian male or really any male get called out and vilified for being assertive?!

I appreciated Aparna’s thoughtful take on sexism, racism and classism. I enjoyed listening to her reading her own words- it made it much more approachable. I don’t think this is an earth shattering book, but it was interesting to see how Aparna has been able to launch her career and her life in a new direction.
Thanks to NetGalley for the ALC.

Read/Listen if:
❤️ You have been called “too … loud/opinionated/independent/etc.”
❤️ You are labeled as a “high performer/overachiever”
❤️ Have been called bossy instead of a leader
❤️ Are driven and goal oriented
❤️ Watched Netflix’s Indian Matchmaking series
❤️ Have ever been told directly or indirectly to lower your standards
❤️ Want to learn about the person behind the “Villain”

Audiobook Thoughts:
First and foremost I loved the messaging behind this book… is it a recounting of personal experiences/growth/trauma? Yes, absolutely… is it also a motivational speech/message? Also, absolutely yes… Will it make you think and question your responses to media you consume? Absolutely yes… Is it a damn good TedTalk- should be if it isn’t… Is it meant to make you step back and reevaluate… Again, absolutely yes.

This audiobook was all the things that I hoped it would be… There was backstory and experience shared that was part of Aparna’s story. There was also direct messaging to the reader/listener to listen and reevaluate their decisions and perceptions and to force thought to either back or challenge ideas and thought patterns of the reader/consumer of this content.

Aparna so beautifully discussed racism, classism, sexism, roles and expectations of females in society as well as in Indian culture specifically, and so many more messages/experiences and how this all tied to her experiences and decision making before, during, and after her appearance on Netflix’s Indian Matchmaking show.

From one high achieving independent woman, I really appreciated this audiobook as it made me step outside of myself and think about things that caused discomfort but also backed my beliefs based on my personal experiences of the struggles that can come with being a high achieving goal/career oriented woman.

Thank you NetGalley and Chicago Review Press and Dreamscape Media for the ARC of this audiobook! I am so thankful to obtain a copy to listen to in advance of its release!

After watching Indian matchmaking, I had mixed feelings about Aparna, who was a strong woman who knew what she wanted, but also came across as picky and judgemental with her dates. I was really excited to listen to her voice on the audiobook and hear her side of the story. I don't know a lot about reality TV, but it's obvious there is a lot of editing and creating of villains by the producers. I really enjoyed Aparna's story, which covered other events from her life in addition to her experience on IM and after the show. I really felt for her and appreciate how brave and vulnerable she was in sharing her feelings. This will change the way I look at these so-called celebrities, and how they are treated. I am sure Aparna has a great future ahead of her, I hope that will find love and children as she wants, but either way, I know she'll be successful.

I came into this book knowing nothing of the author. I never saw "Indian Matchmaking" or heard about any of the subsequent drama. I agree with the author's premise about the labels we apply to people and the damage that they can do. And now, having started watching "Indian Matchmaking", I see that the way the author was presented really was unfair. It really seems like they went into the showing looking for someone that they could label as 'difficult' or 'unlikeable', and Aparna fit the bill.

I was interested in this book because the author has an Indian origin, same as me, and I wanted to see what she had to say. I haven't seen Indian matchmaking, but I have heard of it, and being a lover of memoirs and autobiographies, I had to listen to this. When I first read in the synopsis that Aparna was made the 'villain' in the show, I didn't understand what she meant, but as the audiobook progressed, that became clear. I still don't agree with the title, and there are many little things in the book that I find difficult to understand including how most of the book is about Aparna's experience with Indian matchmaking. In general, I could relate with her experiences being typecasted as 'dark'. I also loved the insight she gave into the world of 'reality shows' and how much a person can get affected by how they are portrayed in screen. I think a lesson from this book that will stay with me is to always think twice before judging someone based solely off their on-screen personality/portrayal, even more so before making a public comment.

While I wasn't familiar with the author prior to listening to this book, I was interested in what she had to say after appearing on a "reality" tv show. I was a little surprised how shocked she was at the editing and her portrayal as a villain and her resultant notoriety. Had this been filmed a decade or more ago, yes, it would be more surprising, but with reality tv what it's devolved into over the past couple decades and the numerous social media outlets where everyone shares every thought and reaction with the world, I would think there would have been some hint of how this could all go awry. Having grown up in the days of the Real World and then Road Rules and seeing some of the backlash some of the participants encountered even back then, I would hope more people considering taking on roles in shows of this sort would be more prepared for the aftermath. I'm not blaming Shewakramani for being naive, just surprised she thought opening up her personal life would not possibly have some negative repercussions in this day and age. It's unfortunate these shows don't do more to prepare the participants for possible fallout following the show airing.

I enjoyed this book and am glad I received the audiobook version as it's read by Shewakramani. She is a well-educated woman who knows what she wants and isn't afraid to be herself, even after being portrayed in a negative light. She also encourages others to be themselves. It's refreshing to see someone in the public eye who seems to be presenting who they really are vs. trying to morph into a plastic version of themselves in pursuit of what will get them the most "likes" and "followers". I would hope this book also serves as a warning to future "reality" tv stars that it's not all sunshine and roses and these shows don't necessarily have the participants' best interests in mind. I miss the days of documentaries making the effort to show real life rather than editing for bigger ratings.

Thanks to Dreamscape Media and NetGalley for the ALC in exchange for my honest review.