A beautifully written about about a young girl being forced into a mother and baby unit then give up her baby, and how despite everyone telling her she will forget this ever happened, she never does. This book brought me to tears on several occasions and made me so cross with her parents, society, and the whole system in the 1960’s. Thank goodness for friends, when family are so uncaring in times of need. Such raw emotion, poignant storytelling and ultimate redemption in this beautiful book.

Wow! Heartbreaking story. This randomly showed up on netgally as an instant read, so I decided to scoop it up. So glad I did!

Absolutely beautiful memoir.
I started this one and could not put it down, the author's experience of being an unwed mother in the 1960's Deep South was absolutely heartbreaking. It was also a good reflection on how far we have come as a society on our views of unwed mothers and premarital sex in general. This book is a true testament on forgiveness and a mother's unconditional love for her child.

Have you ever wondered what it was really like to be adopted? This book will let you know all the trials and tribulations of adoption, the good, the bad, and the ugly.

What a gut wrenching memoir. Laura was an unwed pregnant teenager in the 1960’s. When the father refused to marry her or be supportive of the pregnancy her parents sent her to a home for unwed mothers in New Orleans. Here the girls agree that in exchange for staying there they would give their babies up for adoption. Laura desperately wanted to keep her baby but her parents wouldn’t allow it. What a terrible time in the 1960’s with what these girls went through and the shame and stigma toward them. Laura always regretted giving up her baby and it caused her such anguish! She went on to have more children and was such an amazing mother. She was raised by a cold and emotionally unavailable mother so it was so incredible to see how her parenting was so different. 50 years later she was finally reunited with her son. It was a wonderful time in her life and she developed a great relationship with him. This was such an honest and raw memoir. At times it was so heartbreaking. What a strong and resilient person Laura is with all that she has lived through. Such an important and timely memoir as we all know women are still fighting for their rights. It was enlightening to learn what really went on in these homes and to see how women in general were viewed in the 1960’s. If you love memoirs add this one to your must read list.

I could not put this book down! I was hooked from page one. The author's experiences as an unwed teenage mother in the 1960s leapt off the pages as she describes a very different time for women. I loved the author's expression of her own growth and reflection and ultimately forgiveness. This is a great read for anyone who loves memoirs and even fiction readers who want to get into nonfiction reading.

In You'll Forget This Ever Happened, first-time author Laura L. Engel chronicles her bittersweet story about giving up her baby boy in the late 1960s in the Deep South. She reflects on this time from the discovery that she was pregnant by her on-and-off boyfriend and how she was sent away to a home for unwed women. Then she discusses her time after the birth of her child and how it affected most of her life.

This book is so thoughtful and heartfelt as you go on the journey with the author. You'll feel the shame and guilt she feels, you'll experience how she interacts and deals with her family and their actions, and how she harbors this terrible secret for years. It feels like a good friend expressing a hard time that she never meant to let out but has to or she'll explode. And the pop culture touchstones really reflect the times so well.

Even though these events happened a little more than 50 years ago, it's amazing how the reputation of single mothers and unwed mothers has changed so dramatically, It's absolutely shameful how society made these women feel at the time instead of helping them and that the men and boys never had to deal with any type of reputation damage. Believe me, you will get frustrated and even angry with some people in her circle.

While I don't think problems have been resolved completely in these matters, it's a relief that getting pregnant before marriage is not considered so detrimental to a woman even if she doesn't remain with the man. And women are not separated from their children if they choose, and many even engage in open adoptions.

Getting back to the book, the author depicts pregnancy and the feelings afterward so well. If you're a mom yourself, it may resonate with you, especially the feelings you have about your unborn baby and how you feel physically and somewhat mentally afterward. Some depictions of the birth and aftermath are not for the faint of heart.

I'm happy that the book also covers the author's life after these torrid events. Although she experiences plenty of more hurt, she also summons so much strength to get through so much. She's an inspiration to women with her ability to adapt to many situations and come out even better than before. Many surprising events occur in her life after her boy "Jamie" is born--some that even shocked me.

Overall, I really enjoyed this book, and I don't think you have to be a mom to understand the pain that the author experienced. It's just a good story.

The title is the pithy statement countless unwed mothers were told by the homes they were sent to due to their pregnancies over 50 years ago. Times were very different. Pregnant girls were a source of shame and embarrassment and had to deal with the consequences while the rat boys had the luxury of walking away.
Such is the story of Laura Engel. It’s an engrossing, gut wrenching read. She does have a dream come true reunion with her firstborn, but there’s a shocking conclusion, which knocked me sideways.
It’s a timely read for so many reasons.

A heart-wrenching memoir, this is an account written 50 years later reflecting on the authors time as a scared 17-year-old unwed girl in the 1960’s. Pregnant and deserted by her boyfriend, the family thought to hide her shame as she was force to go to home for unwed mothers in New Orleans where she would give birth and then give her baby up for adoption. This was the standard in the day, with little support for women in this situation. Unwed mothers were ostracized while the men went on with their lives, and told to just forget all about it after they give birth so that they can return to their life before as they knew it. Laura, who had a fractured relationship with her mother, struggled all her life with the guilt and loss of her baby boy Jaimie. Laura, just 4 months after returning home from the Home, ran away to California and married a musician, giving birth to three more boys. While still doubting herself and insecure, that abusive marriage didn’t last more than 10 years. Fortunately, Laura met Gene, a compassionate man and the love of her life and blended her family, finally living her life of promise and hope. It was only as an adult, late in life, could she come with to terms to forgive her young self and realize that by consenting to adoption, she chose love for her son as she was too young to raise him. She chose to write this memoir to tell her story that she thought she would never share.
A personal journey, the author’s writing style transports you to that time and into her world so that you can feel her struggles and pain and her joys. As a memoir, we only see how this event in her life affected her, not her parents or brothers or the baby who was adopted, and for this we need to keep that in mind. Enlightening read, some things are detailed while other recollections are rushed or untold. A surprise ending, which I didn’t see coming and added some confusion as there was no hints or reasons for it. Sorry, not going to give it away, but it's worth the read.

Many thanks to #netgalley #lauraengel #you’llforgetthiseverhappened for the opportunity to read and review this book.

Thank God times have changed. Laura Engel tells her story of becoming pregnant in the 60s when being pregnant and unmarried was a brand placed on the young woman who was then treated by family and society as a murderer. Place that young woman in the South, and it was worse.

When her family turns their back on her and she wanted nothing more than to love and raise her child, she is forced into an adoption situation. Laura tells in detail about her time in a home for unwed mothers, the birth and adoption of her son, and the years that followed, every day thinking about the son she was forced to give away.

A well-written story that takes you into the home for unwed mothers, and the heart of a mother forced to do something she viewed as unsurvivable.

I would say it’s normally the book cover that attracts my attention first but it was the title of “You’ll forget this ever happened” that immediately tugged at my heart. I then looked closer at the book cover which has a baby cot card as its centre. Then my attention was drawn to the byline, “Secrets, Shame and Adoption in the 1960’s”.

This book is about and written by Laura Engel at 17 years old and is the eldest and only daughter of Billy and Ann. Laura has two younger brothers, Tommy and Michael whom she cares for regularly. Laura’s grandmother lives nearby and Laura visits her every day. Ann, Laura’s mum is a bit strange in that she will suddenly take herself off to bed and refuse to interact with her family. It’s lucky for Ann & Billy’s children that their grandmother is nearby enough to help out, though Ann hates this fact. Laura has been seeing/dating Clay for a while, and in an effort to keep him from dumping her she sleeps with him. However, when she realises she is pregnant, Clay wants nothing to do with the baby or her anymore. In fact, he actually accuses her of sleeping with someone else, trying to say the baby is not his. Laura does kind of go into denial and tries to hide the fact she is pregnant. This hiding the pregnancy doesn’t last long and she soon finds herself grounded and told to make sure she isn’t seen. Billy contacts Clay who insists he will not marry Laura despite pressure from Billy. As Clay has enlisted in the army, Billy even attempts to get the army to put pressure on him to coerce him in to marrying Laura. It soon becomes apparent that Clay, his family and the army are more than happy to ignore the fact Laura is pregnant with Clay’s baby. The “problem” and possible solutions are left to Laura and her family. Laura thinks of all sorts of scenarios, maybe she could have her baby, then her mum could bring up the baby. Laura knows her mum loves babies and remembers her as always happy when her brothers were babies. So Laura is shocked when her parents take her out on a drive to a place the church has suggested to her grandmother for unwed mothers. The home is in a rather rough part of New Orleans, so much so when the car pulls up, Ann refuses to get out of the car and it is Billy that takes Laura up to the door and inside. They are taken inside by Miss Felton who immediately starts reciting the information about the home for unwed mothers. Though Miss Felton refers to the home as an “institute of mercy” and goes on saying it is also a child rearing institution, and an adoption agency. Miss Felton sings the praises of the home saying the staff are Christian, and there are more than 20 Doctors and interns that provide their services as well as a graduate nurse on duty all the time. Miss Felton also heavily emphasises having an excellent success rate rehabilitating the girls. Laura zones out, she has come to the conclusion she is going to be stuck here until the baby is born anyway. Miss Felton turns her attention to Laura telling her she is doing such a good thing, giving her child a chance of a better life in a good home and parents. It’s then Laura realises she isn’t just at this place to hide whilst she has her baby, and then return home with her baby. Laura is initially stunned that everyone expects her to give away her baby and plans on changing their minds.
Laura enjoys working in the nursery at night with the nurse employed by the home. Laura makes friends with some of the girls and avoids the ones she doesn’t care to associate with.
Laura slips into a routine, just as the other girls do. Sadly, when the time comes Laura has to sign her baby away and she is expected to return home with the cover story of staying with her other grandmother for a while. The baby is not to be mentioned. Laura does manage to sneak back inside the home and the nursery to see her baby one last time and its during this visit that she steals the name label from the cot of her treasured son. This card is the thing she looks at every birthday, Christmas, family event. It’s her one link to her first child. Despite other relationships she never ever forgets her son.

I don’t want to go into anymore detail about the book as I want you all to buy it, or borrow it from the library and read it for yourselves. The book is written as if Laura is sat telling you her story, how events unfolded, her relationship with her parents, before, during and after the birth of her son, their first grandchild. I really liked the description of her “mama whose only nod to makeup Revlon’s bright red Queen of Diamonds lipstick” and the other description referencing Laura imagining her baby as her “tiny tears doll.” In this book you feel like you are on the journey with Laura, experiencing her confusion, disbelief, shock and horror of her boyfriend refusing to marry her, being sent to an unwed mother’s home and having to sign her baby away. Then her sadness, depression and constant pining for her missing child. We also learn about events from the perspective of her son, and that of his adoptive parents. The book is a huge wave of ever-changing emotions and you really do feel like reaching into the book to hug Laura. How times have changed, now young women get to keep their babies and have support to bring them up. In Laura’s era she really didn’t have a choice, or she would have done what one of the other girls in the home did and keep her baby. This other girl had a boyfriend who wanted her and her baby though. Unfortunately, Laura does not have that support. Even when she returns home, life doesn’t really improve for her. Nor does it improve with her marriage, and the children she goes on to have. She loves her children but none of them can replace that place in her heart for her first-born son.

This book certainly makes you wonder how many others are living with this type of heartbreak. I have read other books on the subject, particularly ones where the young mothers are horrifically mistreated. Though I guess you could say, Laura didn’t go through the harshest treatment, she still had her rights removed and was told what she had to do rather than there being support for her to do what she really wanted to do which was to raise her son.

Summing up, this is a heart-breaking but amazing true story of a resilient brave woman!

Unbelievable story that hits so close to home. I picked this book because my mother also had a secret son. My brother was kept a secret for 40 years until he also found my mother. The detail that the writer uses to put you in the girls place at the time of this story is unbelievable. Realizing the time period and the shame of a single mother is hard to believe now. The author details the time period well by allowing you to fully understand what economic impact the mother would face trying to keep a child, when she has no income. I had a hard time putting this book down because I so desperately wanted her to find her son. Even though she loses him in the end he will never be lost to her. My brother still lives in Germany where my mother gave him up. But we are able to keep in touch and he will be coming to visit in June.

I recently listened to Laura Engel's Family Secrets podcast interview with Dani Shapiro. I was crying as I was listening and googled her name before I finished listening. I feel so honored to be able to read her memoir. Lots more tears, but it's truly heartwarming to see her happy ending.You'll Forget This Ever Happened is a book I will never forget-highly recommend!!!