This book promised to be interesting as it is set in New York City during the Eighties and touches upon the AIDS crisis of the time. It also is about the dance world and will no doubt appeal to anyone who is part of that world or who is intrigued by it.
Though there was plenty of description of each character, I never fully warmed to them and they felt two-dimensional to me. I kept reading to find out more; why was everyone such a mess and what had happened to cause it? In the end, nothing was very clear and the predictable ending was not satisfying at all. It felt as if, as readers, we'd missed something. (Maybe I did?) I somehow wanted more.

Thank you to NetGalley for an advance copy of this book.

Set in the world of ballet and spanning from the early days of the AIDS crisis to current day Los Angeles and New York City, They’re Going to Love You is a rare novel that is so moving that it is hard not to finish in one sitting. Carlisle Martin is born to a dancer and choreographer in 1970s New York, and spent her days dreaming of being apart of her father’s new life in Greenwich village with his partner, James, a complicated younger choreographer who is eager to share his passions and creative inner-life with Carlisle.

Early on, we learn Carlisle has named by her father after he found the name in a book, a book no one can identify after the fact. Carlisle searches for her own name in pages of the classics that filled her father’s home the Village, and the novel follows Carlisle as she searches for so much more — a sense of home, a place she belongs, an artistic purpose. Everyone in Carlisle’s life is rooted with a passion for movement, and author Meg Howrey writes about ballet with such vivid detail that it leaps off the page. She makes an art form that might feel alienating or distant incredibly digestible and inviting. Carlisle is a compellingly fraught character, but her father Robert is beyond fascinating. Howrey describes him in all this eccentricities it’s impossible not to be enamored. In on instance, Carlisle tells us “all their cats are named after the murdered Romanov children; my father is good at naming things.”

The novel jumps around time from current day, middle-aged Carlisle to her during her adolescence, and it sustains emotional tension through a mysterious falling out with her father. Howrey explores deep emotional landscapes while also creating experts of the art of dance out of her readers. “It’s very strange, in the midst of great emotional turmoil, to have people want to tell you a ballet anecdote.”

I received an advanced copy of this book from Doubleday through NetGalley.

I’m a huge enthusiast of ballet novels, especially those set in New York in the 80s and 90s, and Meg Howrey’s latest is an absolute gem.

The story captures the atmosphere of both the world of ballet and the city beautifully, though it’s the characters and their tangled relationships that make this book such a tremendously good read.

Deeply immersed in Howrey’s world of ballet is a lovely and lonely protagonist reckoning with her past and her relationship to her family, particularly regarding past events which have left her feeling adrift and alone.

Carlisle’s world is not unhappy one, but perhaps one with less warmth and intimacy than she might like. Her story does a wonderful job of plunging the reader into the ballet world and the sphere of the AIDS crisis, but it’s the family saga aspect of the book where Howrey really gives us her best material.

Typically I’m not fond of forgiveness novels, as they usually require the forgiveness of someone who doesn’t deserve it, but this one is an excellent example of how the theme of forgiveness works so beautifully in a novel when wielded correctly.

The pacing of this book is so off, but be patient. I was surprised at how weak the opening chapter was and felt discouraged. Then a third of the way through They’re Going to Love You really begins to develop. The story and themes are beautiful but muddled. I still recommend if you want to be submerged into the world of ballet and art in America.

Thank you Doubleday Books and NetGalley for sending this book for consideration. All opinions are my own.

Thanks to Doubleday and NetGalley for allowing me to read this wonderful book. Having lived through the AIDS crisis, I found the telling of it sensitive and elegant. The story of a love for ballet, that transcends life, was also lovely.

Just finished this beautiful novel….tears in my eyes. Breathtaking novel about family and loss and choices - it’s about forgiveness and love and connections. This will be one I keep on a shelf so I can pass it daily and remember how lovely it was to be in this intimate world on Bank Street. Thanks to Doubleday for the copy. I’m grateful.

I really enjoyed this book & was pleasantly surprised at how much of a punch it really packed within its 288 pages. I took ballet lessons as a child but was pulled out by my parents after an accident left me with 7 stitches. And while I’d never claim to know much about the ballet world after all this time, I still find the sport extremely beautiful and know of the hard work, drive, & dedication behind it all. This is a gorgeously written character study of a novel and I loved every second of it.

I loved Howrey's last novel, The Wanderers, but They're Going to Love You is a completely different book. Carlisle is an aspiring ballerina who lives in Ohio with her former ballerina mother. Every so often, she gets to visit her father and his partner, James, at their apartment on Bank Street in Greenwich Village NYC...until there’s a betrayal that strains their relationship. The publisher compares this book to The Great Believers by Rebecca Makkai since part of this story features a gay couple in the middle of the 1980's AIDS crisis. But, that storyline is much more of a backdrop to this story about family and a betrayal within that family than the center of the story. They're Going to Love You feels a bit coming of age and ballet is a bond within this family, not the sinister, cutthroat environment it's portrayed as in some other books (The Turnout, The Ballerinas, Astonish Me). This is a quiet, character-driven story, but one that's full of emotion. The writing is gorgeous (though occasionally veers into pretentious) and it's a great pick if you're looking for a dysfunctional family story that feels different.

4.25⭐️'s⁣ 𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗬’𝗥𝗘 𝗚𝗢𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗧𝗢 𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 𝗬𝗢𝗨 by Meg Howrey is a beautiful, complicated story of one woman’s love for both her art and her father. Carlisle lives in the shadow of her parents. Her mother danced for Balanchine and her father first danced, and later became a well-respected company manager capable of making the careers of choreographers. At a young age, Carlisle lands in the middle of their break-up, only seeing her father a couple weeks each year. It’s at his NYC home that she first understands he’s gay, that the man he lives with is his partner, and that a new disease is killing many of his friends.⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣
⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣
Years later, as Carlisle is trying to understand what she needs from her life and her own ballet career, a fissure erupts, dividing her and her father. Never quite sure where the blame lies, Carlisle’s day of reckoning comes unexpectedly when she gets a call her father is dying. 𝐃𝐨𝐧’𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐲, I’ve given nothing away. That all happens right at the start. Then, Howrey goes back and fills in all the missing years, conversations, visits, and heartbreak. ⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣
⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣
𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘺’𝘳𝘦 𝘎𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘓𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘠𝘰𝘶 was a quieter story than many I’m drawn to, but it also had so much that appeals to me. The world of ballet is always fascinating. The 1980s and the early days of HIV/AIDS, especially in a place like NYC, is a sad era, but one that I appreciate being reminded of. At times this is a coming-of-age story and at others, a family drama, both of which I favor. In many ways the story reminds me of 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘎𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘉𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴, though not as epic or painful in scope. Instead, it’s a softly considered story of a daughter’s enduring love for her father, perfect for those who like to savor a book.
⁣⁣⁣⁣⁣
My thanks to @doubledaybooks for an ARC of #TheyreGoingToLoveYou.

Carlisle is a former dancer who is finding some amount of fame as a choreographer. When she gets the call that her estranged father is dying, she must come to terms with their relationship to say goodbye.
I liked a lot about this book. I loved the NYC in the 90's set to the backdrop of ballet and art and the AIDS epidemic. I loved Carlisle's relationship with her father and stepfather and her self-exploration. It is a coming-of-age story but also a family drama.
However, the middle of this book bogged me down and I had a lot of trouble with one storyline that I felt was so unrealistic that the stakes of it should have been so high, but for me they were not. Some simple conversations and treating a young adult as such and not a peer would have gone a long way.
I loved how this book was arranged with current time and the past and the complicated characters and I loved it being set in the ballet world, but also just outside of it. This is a very memorable book- it's almost a mix of Tell the Wolves I'm Home and The Great Believers.

Thank you to Netgalley for the advance copy for review.

Ballet and the AIDS crisis drew me to request this book. The ballet details are fascinating, but I had difficulty connecting to the story. The pacing is very slow, and the passage of time and jumping to different moments of Carlisle’s life was jarring. I felt little emotional impact, although I found Carlisle’s relationships with her parents to be interesting.

Thank you to DoubleDay for sending a digital ARC.

They’re Going to Love You is a quiet character study about a girl, her family, and ballet. The main character, Carlisle, was born into the dance world, with a ballerina mother and a ballet company director father. The book flashes between present day, when adult, professional choreographer Carlisle learns that her estranged father is dying, and the years of her childhood and young adulthood. We see Carlisle grappling with her place in the in her family, the world, and the arts.

I really enjoyed being immersed in the ballet world. I enjoy watching ballet, but I loved experiencing it from the inside. Author Meg Howrey’s writing was terrific, and her characters were authentic and imperfect.

They’re Going to Love You will be a hit for readers who like well-written, character-driven family dramas and coming-of-age stories.

Touching, character driven, filled with the world of ballet and life in NYC in the 1980's. I was here for it! I've never read this author, but her writing is beautiful! I felt so invested in the characters, so drawn into the story.There are a lot of jumps back and forth in time, which can be a bit jarring, but I figured out what time period we were in quickly. I will be checking out the backlist of this author!

𝑰’𝒎 𝒂𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒆- 𝒂𝒍𝒘𝒂𝒚𝒔- 𝒐𝒇 𝒕𝒆𝒏𝒔𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒐𝒓 𝒔𝒕𝒓𝒆𝒔𝒔, 𝒂 𝒑𝒐𝒔𝒔𝒊𝒃𝒍𝒆 𝒇𝒓𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒆, 𝒊𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒆𝒔 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒂𝒅𝒖𝒍𝒕𝒔 𝒐𝒇 𝒎𝒚 𝒍𝒊𝒇𝒆.

This novel beautifully expresses how it feels for a child who isn’t quite sure of her place in her fractured family. How there is a hunger to be inside the enchanted world she believes exists that only adults move freely in. Children are born into worlds and stories that existed before they entered the scene, and it is complicated for Carlisle Martin, whose mother is a former Balanchine ballerina and gay father Robert (who once danced) lives in Greenwich Village with his partner, James, who mentors dancers. Her father has always been a private man, one she is shy around, it is James who is the candid partner, who explains many of her father’s mysteries. Carlisle wants nothing more than to live with them, rather than remain a visitor. Even if she has to keep silent and be gentle around James, who has issues with his feelings (depression), she longs to be anchored in their lives more than she wants ballet, which is in her blood. There is a sickness killing gay men, also in the blood, and she doesn’t quite understand the tragedy that is touching James and Robert’s friends. It is a tragic grief that hangs over their heads, a threat even. She also feels as if her mother is a joke to the pair, feels protective of Isabel despite the emotional distance between them. She is worried that by wanting to nest with them her loyalty is split. Isabel’s having a baby with her husband Ben, forming a family that Carlisle will never fit in with, is a thorn in their bonding. Her mother never wanted her daughter to follow in her footsteps, feeling herself finished with that world, but Carlisle’s father and James are all too happy to feed her dreams. When she is accepted into a performing arts school, ballet is within her reach, it is also a ticket into Robert’s home on bank street. She has always imagined their apartment like the fictional Manderley, well into adulthood she longs for it. There are challenges with ballet too, her height being one, although she wants to belong to something, she isn’t as gifted as her fellow dancers. Illusions die hard, but the adults have their fantasies too, their false narratives. They have seen dreams come true and others fizzle out, and it is devastating as time has its way with them all. As she is taken under James’s wing, he shares confidences, shares more of himself than both of her parents offer her. She also learns more about AIDS. The two are thick as thieves, but it is Robert whom the most loyalty need always be shown. As much as she loves James, it hurts that her father’s true ‘family’ will always mean James, not her. She collects fragments of their history, her mother’s early days performing, Robert’s falling out with LaGrange, his partner’s sacrifices and her own story, but these offerings don’t always form a clear picture. She doesn’t understand the things she learns, being too young to absorb such adult struggles. James often treats her like an equal, well intentioned or not, it doesn’t bode well.

The chapters go back and forth between the present day and the past with the rift between Carlisle, James and her father Robert slowly unfurling. She loses dance for a while, at twenty-four she is finding her identity in Los Angeles and still trying to present herself as something of value to the two when she gets pulled into their relationship “troubles”. James enlists Carlisle to do something for him, without fully grasping the situation, she loves them both so dearly that she plunges headfirst into disaster and deception. There is a torrid, ill-advised love affair that destroys everything, and leaves Carlisle banished from her father and James. When we meet her at forty years old, she is still wrestling with her inner child, with ghosts of the past but has landed on a career, choreography. Through the wreckage, life has opened and no longer is she under the influence and scrutiny of James and Robert. A phone call forces her to confront the past, meet with death and reach out to her father Robert, who has always seemed so very remote.

In the novel, the men, though they lead unconventional lives, still manage to be inside her head so much that her choices orbit what they would do. They are like Gods to her, but humans can’t tower like giants forever. She desires their approval desperately. They appear, from the start, refined, important, their lives richer than the simple domesticity her mother seems to have settled for. It’s exclusive, James and Robert’s complicated relationship, but it’s only a matter of time before she falls from their grace and loses the respect and admiration she tried so hard to earn.

This is a fascinating novel, it isn’t just a passionate story about the arts, expression through dancing; it is also about the choreography of life and relationships. It is about dreams, the fiction we create to excuse our failures, how we reinvent ourselves when what we want slips from our grasp and who we are when we no longer have giants guiding us. It is the unbearable weight daughters often bear in wanting their father’s acceptance, attention and the shame they carry when they don’t receive it. I know there is a lot to unpack, particularly the distance also between Isabel and Carlisle. The silence about her own story, how James is the one who reveals the past that her parents should be sharing, it explains why she hungers to be invited into Robert’s home. No wonder choreography becomes a way for her to understand her existence, to embrace and escape her pain.

Yes, a good read!

Publication Date: November 15, 2022

Doubleday

🌟THEY’RE GOING TO LOVE YOU🌟 by Meg Howrey ~to be published November 15, 2022

This buzzy, emotional read had softer edges than I was expecting, more Ann Patchett than Black Swan.

We are introduced to Carlisle, a dance choreographer who hasn’t spoken to her father in nineteen years, but we don’t know why. Through flashbacks, we discover that Carlisle has always loved ballet, that it’s in her blood, but that she has struggled to achieve at the highest level due to not having the right body type. We also learn that after her parent’s divorce, her intractable father began life anew as a gay man, while her detached mother remarried and had another child, leaving Carlile to feel like no one loved her best of all. This emotional trauma causes Carlilse to make decisions that she might otherwise not have made, and one betrayal leads to another…

This was such an emotional read, slow and soft, and deeply focused on character development and family relationships. Howrey’s love of dance really comes through, and her depiction of the gay scene in New York during the beginnings of the AIDS crisis was quite moving. The scenes with James were my absolute favorites, his voice was so special!

My one gripe would be that I don’t love it when secrets cause the main dramatic tension in a book. I think because I am such an over-communicator that I always feel exasperated – just tell them how you feel! Just tell them what you did! Own up, you know? Get it off of your chest. It’s just not my favorite plot device, but I get that it works for most people. Still, this was a beautiful read and oh so quotable (I didn’t read a finished copy so I’m not allowed to quote, but just trust me). Whole-heartedly recommend!

Unfortunately, this didn't live up to my expectations. Howrey's beautiful writing wasn't enough for me to really invest in the plot, as much as I would've loved to.

Why have Carlisle and her father Robert been estranged for 19 years? This is the story, told by Carlisle, as she reflects after learning from his husband James that Robert is dying. Carlisle has a different sort of childhood as the daughter of Isabel, once a Balanchine ballerina and Robert, who ultimately admitted that he loved James. Raised largely in Ohio, where her mother has decamped and left the ballet behind, with one week a year in New York with James and Robert, she also wants to be a dancer. Not so easy, though, when you keep getting taller. Her relationship with Robert and James is magical until she makes a bad decision, one which she doesn't recognize at the time as being selfish. This has terrific atmospherics of both 1980s New York (and sadly, when AIDS was raging) and of the ballet community in general. I liked the way Howrey unpeeled Carlisle's story, as well as the stories of her parents and James. And ballet, oh ballet. It runs beneath everything in this beautifully constructed and written novel where the small bits (the teddy bears, the gorgon) are as good as the larger ones. Thanks to Netgalley for the ARC. Dance fans should pick this up immediately alongside anyone looking for a great read.

A compelling and emotionally complex look at family, belonging, loss, memory, and forgiveness. Full review posted at BookBrowse: https://www.bookbrowse.com/mag/reviews/index.cfm/ref/pr290624

A perceptive and powerful book, this novel tells the story of Carlisle Martin. Carlisle has always loved ballet and wants to become a professional ballerina like her mother once was. She spends only a few short weeks each year with her father, who lives in New York. Those weeks are always the highlight of Carlisle's year -- full of art, music, dance and the attention of her father, Robert, and his partner, James. After she graduates college, Carlisle hopes she will finally grow closer to Robert and James and become a part of their world. But a series of events, and a complicated history that even Carlisle does not fully understand, leads to a falling out between Carlisle and Robert. For the next 19 years, the two essentially do not speak. When Carlisle gets a call from James indicating that Robert is not long for this world, Carlisle has to decide whether to see him again. In making that decision, she reflects on her childhood, her relationship with both of her parents and James, and the way the formative events of her early years created the path for her life.

Well written and thoroughly engaging, this novel explores interesting themes related to family, art, privilege, and secrets through strong and intriguing characters, most of all Carlisle, her mother, Isabel, and James.

Highly recommended!

gosh this book was so good, i literally couldn’t put it down. there is so much emotion in this book, from the complex relationships, the art, the time period, everything. it is so beautifully written, very poetic and fast paced. this book made me appreciate the hard work of ballet dancers and what it takes to dedicate your life to something. but this book was so much more than that!!! it’s about love. wanting to be loved and appreciated by the ones who should love you the most. i felt like it really conveyed the complexity of human relationships.