Thank you to Netgalley and the publishers for giving me access to the free advanced digital copy of this book.

What a wonderful book, full of wonderful representation.

Gael, a trans teen who doesn’t like to open up, finds himself at a support group for LGBTQIA+ teens. He, of course, doesn’t think he’ll get much out of this aside from supporting his best friend. What he ends up finding is so much more when he gets to know Declan, someone who tries to Gael out of his shell and trust those around him.

I loved reading this. Though there are moments that are heavier (check those content tags!), I found myself deeply moved by this story and the characters. This is something I find refreshing in young adult books. There are teens who don’t just have the stress-free fluffy lives. So many are dealing with real struggles, especially at home. Seeing it written and handled with such care in this book was appreciated.

The relationship between Gael and Declan was also just so sweet. These two just get each other and I loved the push and pull of their interactions.

4 stars

TWs: depression, suicidal ideation, attempted suicide, body dysmorphia, transphobia, outing, overdosing
Wow, wow, wow, where is all the hype for this? If I can give you that follows Gael, a trans teen who starts attending Plus, a support group for LGBTIA+ teens in his area. There he meets Declan, and the two become fast friends, and maybe more. However, this not just a cute little romance. Gael's mother struggles with with depression, and has attempted suicide. Gael's father left them years ago and Gael is trying to balance caring for his mother with his own blossoming social life and his senior year. Parts of this are really sweet. For one, Declan, is truly wonderful. He is sweet, patient and understanding and his friend group welcomes Gael with open arms. Its easy to root for Gael and Declan. I really loved reading about a teen who is figuring out how to have a friend group for the first time. Its not seen a lot, but is deeply relatable. That being said, I wish each friend, Declan included, was fleshed out more. I even wish we saw more of who Gael is outside of being trans and a good son. The little glimpses of his work we saw with Plus were great and I wanted more!

The heavier parts of this are also well done. I think this author has a clear understanding of depression and what it means to love someone with it. It often felt very visceral, and there is one part of this book where the reader truly hurts for Gael, because we can see what's coming when he can not. It is tough, but well done. Also heavy is Gael's journey with body dysmorphia. I haven't read a book that clearly explains what its like as well as this one. and I think it would be valuable to for non-trans readers who maybe don't get it. I also love the way Declan spoke to Gael about it. It was just so sweet. Ultimately, this book was great, and I can not wait for more from this author. Teens will get a lot from this just as long as they are aware of what it is going in.

3.5 stars // honestly this book was hard for me because of how YA it was, so I’m rounding up. I struggled with the main character because he was so, so isolated and therefore had very different understanding of stakes and priorities than I’m used to, but he’s a teenager so I should have anticipated that. If you want a queer & trans coming of age story with a hell of a lot about mental health, read this! wasn’t for me but this could absolutely be your cup of tea

rep: gay black man love interest, queer trans man MC (i think he’s latino but i could be wrong), lesbian trans woman side character (unsure of her race), queer side characters

spice level: this is ya so none

tw: discussion of suicide, discussion of mental health, discussion of dysphoria and disassociation, attempted suicide by a parent

If I Can Give You That is a lot. And I don't mean just the title. This book touches on some tough topics. Possibly too much at times. It also still has plenty of it's sweet moments, as well. And it's important that teens have these books available to them. All kids deserve to see themselves in stories.

Thank you to Netgalley and Quill Tree Books for providing me with a review copy.

This was really cute and emotional and a really beautiful exploration of being trans and learning that you’re deserving of love.
Lots of content warnings for suicide and depression. I found myself stressed in a way I knew I should be.

First off, I'll admit that I'm not exactly the intended audience of this book as a 40-something cisgender heterosexual female - but as a mom to a trans/nonbinary child, I enjoy reading books that can help give me a better perspective of their experience. This book is written well, and I really enjoyed reading it. I think it would be a great book for teens to read.

The story follows Gael, a teen boy who is transgender, but I love that there is a whole cast of characters representing different parts of the LGBTQ+ community who have their own stories to share. I found Gael to be a very relatable character, especially since I experience some similar anxieties that he does. I especially found it interesting to follow Gael's exploration of his sexuality, since I know there can be a lot of stigma about this topic for trans people, even within the LGBTQ+ community. I also think Gael's perspective was good because it helped me gain a better understanding about gender dysphoria. I enjoyed watching Gael grow considerably over the course of the story in a realistic way.

This book is so much more than just a transgender story though, which gave it a lot of depth. Gael lives with his mom, who struggles with mental illness, and some difficult topics are encountered along the way. It also takes a close look at family bonds, as Gael holds some strong feelings toward his father, who he hardly has any contact with since his parents' divorce. Plus, there's all the experiences that many teens face in high school, like planning for the future and submitting college applications.

A special "thank you" to the author, publisher, and NetGalley for the free review copy of this book. I really enjoyed reading it, and all opinions expressed in my review are completely my own.

This book was ok. It is a queer YA coming of age story with a trans MC and I initially pick it up because I love YA Romance and inclusive stories that include trans people. However, I couldn’t connect with this book and it felt more like fiction with a side of Romance than YA romance.

The rest of my review might contain spoilers, so keep reading if you don’t mind them
Things I liked: I appreciated the every day experience of a trans person, the dilemma of where they are allowed to go to the bathroom, how they manage body dysmorphia, their hopes, etc. mental health representation from a side character.
Things that didn’t work for me: the whole book was super slow and boring at times. I ended up changing to audio or would have dnf. it also didn’t feel like a Romance which was a little of a disappointment.
There was a lot of internal dialogue that at times felt repetitive or without a good reason or point,

Be mindful of the TG/CW, this book deals with pretty heavy topics with his mom having major depression, suicide attempt and his dad having cheated on the mom in the past.

Gael is a high school student in a Nashville suburb. He lives with his mother, a woman with severe depression, and he has virtually no contact with his father, who moved out of state after the divorce. His father and mother were high school sweethearts, but as her depression worsened, his dad began cheating and Gael got caught in the middle, while also struggling with his own gender dysphoria. It’s now senior year and Gael has few friends, and even fewer plans for the future. He struggles with anxiety over his acceptance and presentation, as well as the pressure of looking after his suicidal mother. Gael tries to keep a low profile in general, because people just hurt each other, and he doesn’t have the emotional bandwidth to invest in friends he’ll probably lose.

Gael’s one true friend, Nicole, was a neighbor before Gael’s home life imploded. Gael watched Nicole transition, which helped him to recognize his own dysphoria, and they have remained friends even though she’s now in college. Nicole helps run PLUS, an LGBTQIA+ support group, and has continually invited Gael to attend. When he finally does, Gael meets Declan, a boy from his school with whom he has some classes. Gael has been too shy to speak with Declan, but Declan is bright, outgoing, and attractive. Gael can’t help but respond to Declan’s overtures, not that Gael thinks much about people’s attractiveness. He also can’t imagine anyone finding him attractive, or suitable as a partner in any case. So, Gael’s a little startled by the notion that Declan wants to be a friend, or have conversations, or…more.

This story isn’t a typical YA romance in that the main character doesn’t consider himself to be worthy of a romantic relationship. He’s been too busy adjusting to all the dramatic changes in his life to even consider the possibility of romance. But, Declan hasn’t had the same struggles, and while it hasn’t been easy for him to find a good and loving partner, he’s supremely hopeful for that to happen. And, maybe Gael will be able to accept Declan’s interest for the genuine affection Gael’s been lacking most of his adolescence.

I really enjoyed this book, and found it to be a bittersweet intersection of many traumas for the main character. Gael is a solid narrator, who doesn’t see himself as a protagonist. He’s exhausted by the struggles of just being him, and can barely see past tomorrow to plan for his future. Add to this that his mother is worsening and his absentee father wants to reconnect–against Gael’s wishes. He’s already been destroyed by his dad’s abandonment once, a second time would end their family forever. Unfortunately, Gael’s a minor and his father’s parental rights don’t stop because of Gael’s grief and fears. Gael’s in the worst spot possible for maintaining normalcy, and it’s through Declan, and the extended friendships he brings, that we see any bright side for Gael going forward.

There are a lot of very tenuous moments where Gael must overcome his instinctual silence to ask for the help he really needs. And, throughout this time, he’s also navigating first experiences of physical affection and potential romantic dating. It’s overwhelming and terrifying and awkwardly wonderful. I loved this collection of characters and their struggles, which help Gael recognize his own needs. Nicole is a fabulous friend and helper to Gael, along with Declan. As a person who works with teens on the daily, these characters read like real people with real issues. It’s not a breezy story, and takes some time to experience in full. Do not expect a fast-paced, social-media driven, TikTok-choreographed story. It’s quiet and patient, and allows depth of character to simmer and develop. This story is highly recommend for questioning teens, and people who like realistic queer YA stories.

This was a wonderful read. If I Can Give You That touched on some difficult topics, such as: depression/suicide, body dysmorphia, bullying, cheating, divorce, and anxiety/panic attacks. It also touched on sexuality, and Gael's journey or discovering his sexuality. I enjoyed the characters and the story, it was definitely more serious than other YA stories, but it had its sweet moments as well.

Gael is entering his senior year and is counting down the says till he turns 18 and can finally get his too surgery. Everything else in between he takes one day at a time, he can't even begin to think about after (after graduation, after he moves out, after top surgery... it's all too much to think about). Enter Declan, out and proud and one of the few African American students at Gael's school, the two become fast friends. As feelings begin to intensify, Gael starts to feel things he's never felt before, has never let himself feel before, and he has to decide whether to embrace them and risk being hurt, or to run away from them and remain alone.

If I Can Give You That was a bit of a coming of age journey/ friends-to-lovers romance/ queer awakening. It had hard moments and scary moments, but it also had soft and funny moments as well. Definitely an, overall, enjoyable read.

If I Can Give You That is a warm-hearted and tender story about friendship, self-acceptance, forgiveness, and coming-of-age, and I thoroughly enjoyed it.

Gael is a trans boy who's support system includes his mother, who suffers from depression, and his best friend, a trans girl named Nicole. When Gael meets Declan at an LGBT+ group, he ends up discovering a new group of friends, and begins to open himself up. I found Gael's struggle with vulnerability and trusting others to be relatable, and his hesitation felt justified due to his not-entirely-stable upbringing. I enjoyed watching him slowly allow himself to trust and to love, along with a journey of self-discovery involving sexuality, self-confidence, and hopes for the future.

Along with Gael's journey, we get a delightful cast of supporting characters who all had unique personalities and something different to contribute to the friendship group. I was thoroughly entertained by their dynamics.

Overall, I really enjoyed this story. While it did touch on heavier topics, I found the general tone of the story to be heartfelt and warm. This was an enjoyable read that I would highly recommend.

I loved this book but it’s not a lighthearted book. This book deals with some really hard issues, but honestly this is a really hopeful book. I loved the characters and their progress through the book. On that note, I loved the side characters: the queer squad is just hilarious.

But Gael is so sweet, he is shy and trying to fly under the radar. With his mom struggling he is just trying to make it through high school. He really comes out of his shell and I was so proud of him in this book. Declan is adorable, friendly and so patient. He really reached out and creates such a safe space. I just love their relationship.

As an ace person, I thought that this book was a great representation of different explorations and conversations around asexuality and finding a label that fits. Asexuality is really confusing because separating attraction types is difficult, especially as a teenager. So I loved those conversations.

Parent’s guide:
Sex & Nudity: mild (body dysmorpia)
Violence & Gore: mild
Profanity: mild (some swearing)
Alcohol, Drugs & Smoking: mild
Frightening & Intense Scenes: moderate (suicide attempt, reference to past suicide attempt, reference to racism, homophobia, infidelity, panic attack)

A senior, Gael does not have many connections at his high school. When his best friend from his previous school convinces him to attend a support group for LGBTQIA+ teens, Gael does not intend to participate very much. But there, Gael meets Declan, a fellow student at his high school. Slowly, Gael develops a friendship with Declan who brings Gael into his friend group. And he gradually begins to open up to Declan and his other new friends about the challenges he is facing at home and as he is navigating his identities. Just as he is growing close to Declan, a tragedy at home forces Gael to question his new relationship and wonder whether he was better off staying cut off from other people.

This is a touching and perceptive story about family, friends, and the dimensions of connection.

Highly recommended!

If I Can Give You That is a very heartfelt coming-of-age story that deals with a number of heavy topics. Specifically, this book intricately portrays mental health struggles and how they affect the lives of people around you. Bulla does not shy away from showing the readers how Gael's mother's severe depression affects him. In fact, much of the book centers it.

This is a very character-driven book that is heavy on introspection. Much of the bigger events surround the third-act conflict, but most of the plot is a passive facilitator of Gael's growth and his budding friendship with Declan.

Gael and Declan's relationship is a beautiful slow burn, even just their friendship. It pulls at your heartstrings to see the two become closer as Gael get more and more comfortable with opening up.

Still, there is a major pacing issue with this novel. It was a much slower read than most YA novels I've read. I dragged myself through the first third of it, if not more, before it picked up. Even then there were still parts that dragged. I would say the book only flowed continuously for me during and after the third-act conflict.

This was a sweet book overall, and I'm sure there is an audience for it, I'm just not sure it's a book for me. 3.25 stars.

While i thoroughly enjoy Gael's story, I hope readers look at content warnings before diving in. This book touches on several hard subjects.

First, this book needs to have clear content warning. It deals with a lot of heavy topics and it deals with them well in a YA book but I do hope that clear content warnings are provided.

Overall I really liked this book, YA doesn't often explore sexual identity and gender identity and while they are not the same things, questioning and exploring those can come hand in hand. As said above it also touches on a lot of topics regarding mental health and substance abuse. I thought that the author did a good job handling these topics because they are things that teenagers do have to deal with in their lives and the mental health challenges of a parent can be a completely different experience to a young adult.

The love story was also really cute and added a bit of levity to the story was well.

This book will be so helpful to so many different kinds of teens whose lives aren't picture perfect and don't want another story that ties everything with a neat bow. Life is messy for some people, and it's nice to see it represented while also seeing that there is hope and light at the same time.

I very much enjoyed watching this book unfold. Seeing Gael grow from resistance to even attending meetings at the center to full on involvement was pure joy to see.

The heartbreak he suffers throughout thought and the continual struggle felt so completely unfair!

While I wound up feeling more empathy for Gael’s father than I thought I would in the beginning, I found myself feeling less empathy for his mother. Ironically, even though she was the one who stuck around, it felt as if she manipulated him emotionally far more than Lucas did. I would have liked to have seen some sort of acknowledgment on her part regarding that or a confronting of that situation.

The relationship between Gael and Declan was positively lovely! Declan’s unwavering concern and acceptance was beautiful, and watching Gael slowly be integrated into a friend group was also great to see.

If I Can Give You That is an earnest, poignant debut by new author Michael Gray Bulla of what it means to grow up queer in modern-day conservative America. It takes a genuine look at the pressures placed on today's teenagers in a world that isn't always friendly to their survival, and the importance of making connections to get through the tough times.

Gael is used to sticking to himself. As a seventeen year old trans boy in small town Tennessee, he is perfectly used to being alone, and he is content to stick to that status quo going into his final year of high school. After all, he has bigger problems to worry about: his mother's depression might be getting bad again, and after his father up and left from their lives a few years ago, he's the only one she has to get them both through this. So he certainly isn't expecting anything to come of going with his best friend to the local LGBTQIA+ teen club. He definitely isn't expecting to meet mellow, friendly, attractive Declan and be drawn into his group of friends. But as life gets worse at home, can Gael maybe start to trust Declan with the weight he carries?

This book deals with a lot. The depictions of what it means to be queer (and more specifically trans) in the United States today is very well done, and Gael's struggles are depicted in a genuine way. The struggles with mental health and the impact that has on both the person suffering and those around them are particularly poignant, hitting a little too close to home at times. Then, watching how Gael was changed by his parents' separation and his father leaving... As a teacher to younger teenagers, this felt particularly impactful and well-done. The change this has on children during their formative years is definable, and Bulla picks up on this in the writing. Overall, it is lovely to watch Gael develop from a shy, withdrawn kid lost in the world to a young man with a genuine purpose and direction by the end of the story.
On the other hand, it felt at times like this book tried to deal with too much and in turn didn't have the space to successfully handle either. There were two large, separate issues being depicted: Gael's identity and bonds to the outside world (especially Declan and his friend Nicole), and Gael's bonds with his family - in particular his estranged father and suicidal mother. Neither really had the opportunity to get fully resolved satisfactorily... Declan often felt two-dimensional; while problems he had were mentioned, they were fleshed out and he felt more like a cheerful, mellow character meant to prop up Gael. Nicole and their other friends often got lost in the shuffle, to the point that I admittedly gave up on keeping track of who was who. The problems with Gael's dad felt hand-waved away by the end.

Overall, this is a lovely debut novel that needed just a bit more space to reach its stride. I'm excited to see what Bulla does next!

TW// suicidal ideation, depression, suicide attempt, overdose, anxiety, mentions of panic attacks, divorce, mentions of cheating, mentions of misgendering, mentions of transphobia, body dysphoria, puking, mentions of outing, mention of bullying, mention of racism, mentions of underage drinking, mention of a mom’s death

If I Can Give You That is a queer coming of age story. It follows Gael as he explores his identities, falls in love with his best friend, and tries to manage life with his mom’s depression.

This book handled some important topics really well, but I ultimately felt that this book was lacking in some key areas.

Michael Gray Bulla does a fantastic job of addressing the realities of life as a trans person, the struggles of loving someone with a mental illness, and the disappointment of having a terrible father. There’s discussions of gender dysphoria and transitioning that felt really well written. I loved how it highlighted both the good and bad of what it’s like to be trans in America. This will definitely be a really eye opening read for anyone who isn’t trans and wants to know more about trans people. The plotline revolving around Gael’s mom was really hard to read and it hit really close to home at times, but it was really well done. The topic of Gael’s dad was another part of the story that was hard to read and I’d be lying if said I wasn’t on the verge of screaming from pure frustration from it at times, but I really appreciated how Michael dived deep into how Gael’s dad’s actions impacted him. Terrible parental figures make really strong impacts on their child’s development yet books often brush over the whole depth of that impact. Michael wasn’t afraid to explore that depth and how it impacted all of Gael’s relationships.

I loved Declan in this story and how supportive he was of Gael. His personality was fun and outgoing yet he was down to earth with all of his relationships. I liked Gael, too, but not to the same degree as how much I liked Declan. I sort of saw myself in Gael. The awkardness, the anxiety about social situations, and his whole personality reminded me of myself. I also truly believe that if anyone were to confess that they liked me, my reaction would be just like Gael’s (even though I wish I could handle it in less messy ways but let’s be honest - I can’t).

Unfortunately there were a lot of negatives in this book as well and they hindered from my enjoyment of the story.

The pacing was possibly my biggest issue with this book. The whole book felt like a slog to get through. It had a lot to do with the writing style. Something about it felt slightly dull and that made it really hard to get interested in the story. There was also lots of times where this story lost steam. It tried so hard to portray what day-to-day life as a teen is like, but there was often too many unnecessary scenes and details.

There were some parts of this story that felt underdeveloped. I wouldn’t have minded a longer book if some plotlines and characters were focused on more. Most of the minor characters (Jeremiah, Annie, Jacqueline, etc.) only had brief interactions with Gael and those interactions were often used to help Gael work through some of his own problems. I wish there would’ve been more time spent making the minor characters into three dimensional characters who have their own goals and ambitions. The plots, specifically revolving around Jacqueline’s dating life and Nicole’s friendship with Gael, definitely felt lacking throughout most of this story as well.

I had some hope that somehow the ending would redeem the story for me, but it ended up feeling really rushed. The plot with Gael’s dad was hastily wrapped up with an unsatisfying conclusion and a lot of Gael’s mom’s treatment was rushed through. I’m glad that there were some moments where the mental health treatment was addressed, but I would’ve liked to see more about how it was for her to adapt to life back at home and how Gael responded to her being back home.

Overall this book was good, but it wasn’t very enjoyable for me personally. If I Can Give You That had its strong moments and people will like it - there was just some issues with the book that I personally couldn’t overlook when it came to judging how much I truly liked this book.