Thank you to NetGalley, New Harbinger Publications and Munoz & Carroll for the ARC of this self-help book. This is a good read for those who experience anxiety and overthinking in relationships. There are strategies and exercises which enable the reader to engage and practice healthier copies mechanisms through grounding techniques. Only reason for the lower score is this book just wasn’t entirely for me, but can be helpful to others.

Where was this book in my early twenties??

I devoured it. It was so helpful having a book that addressed overthinking and rumination in relationships and how this worked in conjunction together. A lot of self actualization books I had read focused on these topics in anxiety for individuals, but there was very little I found that addressed how it affected relationships.

This book was invaluable. I know I will be rereading it and recommending it to others. I loved the knowledge, I loved the practical advice, I found it transformational.

Thank you to NetGalley and to the publisher for this ARC in exchange for an honest review.

What do you mean we need to stop overthinking in our relationships? Kidding. Mostly. I have always had a tendency to overthink so much in my relationships that I end up sabotaging the entire think. The examples throughout the book were so helpful to apply the situations to my everyday life.

While this won't provide all the answers you might be seeking, there is lots of helpful info and advice here. Probably best to read it before starting a relationship, but certainly useful to those already involved with someone. Recommended.

I really appreciate the free ARC for review!!

CW: This book touches on anxiety, grief, negative self-talk, spiraling, anxiety, OCD and obsessive thoughts, CBT, and similar concepts. I felt the author approached these topics with care, but it may be hard for those struggling with them.


Thank you to Alicia Muñoz, New Harbinger Publications, and #NetGalley for the opportunity to read this arc in exchange for an honest review.


I am an overthinker. A worrier at heart for as long as I can remember. So when I stumbled across this book, Stop Overthinking Your Relationship, I decided to dive in. I don't read self help books very much so I had no expectations except for learning the author's perspective and maybe lend myself a little more awareness to my habits. In this book, Muñoz shares several scenarios of couples to show examples of putting your partner's needs before your own, attachment styles, and the cycles that many people fall into. She then explains her S.L.O.W approach to breaking these cycles and creating healthier ones.

I appreciated this book and Muñoz' writing. I've seen one or two reviews that discussed the pseudoscience she touches on, and I get that. I didn't go through this book looking up every citation or picking my life apart and hoping the book would organize the pieces for me. I think it's also fair to note that CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) is not for everyone. But during my read, I took notes and was happy to see exercises and things I could take away and work on at my own pace. While some sections might be a little long, the author broke up the book in a smart way, where you could easily refer to a section and glean something from it.

3.5-4 stars from an overthinker who's somehow both open-minded and slightly skeptical about self-help books.

My partner and I both struggle with overthinking, so, when I saw this title I was like, let's go! There was so much good information and I loved how it started with a deep analysis into rumination. It had never even occurred to me that overthinking was really a way to feel "in control." This book was great at pointing out things that we, at our core, already knew, but never wanted to really dig beyond the surface.

This book gives lots of situational examples so it's easy to see your own struggles and how to better handle them, I loved learning about the rumination cycles because they are so easy to get caught up in without ever realizing! Now that I am more conscious when I am spinning these cycles in my relationship, it is easier to take a breathe, and put the SLOW method to use. Seeing your thoughts is the easiest part for me because I have already come quite a ways on my mental health journey. Labeling those thoughts is a bit harder because you have to be honest with yourself, is this a feeling? A thought, a fact? Open yourself to the present moment. Finally, welcome the uncomfortable feelings that arise. As a pagan, I opted not to welcome different parts of myself in a mirror with a candle, but the general gist of SLOW was a good thing to keep in mind when you know overthinking is a big issue for you.

I did not fill out all the exercises but we did talk about a few of them that I felt were most applicable to us. I did a few of the solo exercises and journaled a bit on several key points.. I totally understand why filling these exercises out are important for books like this but it always feels like homework...I hate that part. It also felt highly dramatized with a lot of the situational stuff but I get that the author just wanted to be clear. It definitely gives you therapy paperwork vibes at times but overall, very worth it! A lot of great information in a quick read and I am already seeing improvements in how I react to my overthinking!

A big thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for the eARC!

*Special thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for providing this e-ARC in exchange for an honest review. Pub date: September 1, 2022

Overthinking is basically my job so sometimes it can be hard to break that cycle when it comes to home life. This was a helpful guide to recognize patterns and try to spot and reframe situations before they transform into bigger issues. I did find it a bit drawn out but there are some useful worksheets and exercises within to prompt some conversation (and self-reflection).

If you are in a relationship, this book is for you. The subtitle is “Break the Cycle of Anxious Rumination to Nurture Love, Trust, and Connection with Your Partner“ to let you know what’s in store once you crack the cover. Author Muñoz draws upon research and her counseling experience in this practical approach to examining the deleterious effects of overthinking in relationships. She offers several relationally inclusive examples of the types of conflict that can arise when we overthink.

The different types of rumination and relationship approaches are examined, and suggestions are offered to help us break our own unhelpful mental cycles. There are even questionnaires, with links to online duplicates, that we can use to evaluate our own rumination and relational styles. The good news is that we can diagnose and treat our own overthinking if we use this book thoughtfully, offering ourselves the grace necessary to heal and grow.

Five stars will have to do for this brilliant and valuable resource; I would really like to award it more! I will be encouraging my spouse to read it, as well as other family and friends. My eternal gratitude to New Harbinger for this ARC. All opinions expressed are strictly my own.

#StopOverthinkingYourRelationship #NewHarbinger #NetGalley #IfCatsCouldRead #kindlesallthewaydown #SelfHelp #Marigoldthecatmodel #rescuedismyfavoritebreed #gingercatsrock #fivestarread

Introspective and enlightening. A wonderful read. Perfect for those held back by their own baggage. Plus the cover is very cute!

I overthink everything, my relationship included. This was a great wake up call and reality check. This instilled some confidence in me and some good skills.

Stop Overthinking Your Relationship is an incredible resource for those in relationships who find themselves super anxious, always concerned about what their partner thinks about them and always fearing love could be lost at any moment. Alicia's down-to-earth writing style is full of wisdom and practical exercises to help anxious partner's become their best selves. I highly recommend!

Stop Overthinking Your Relationship by Alicia Muñoz addresses ruminative thinking patterns that can damage relationships.

The author describes rumination as a pattern of passive rather than active thinking, and she describes different kinds of rumination cycles such as blame or control-based rumination. These each relate to a shortage of “some important psychological nutrient.”

There was a bit of pseudoscience talk to do with thoughts and energy. I tracked down a reference that the author cited, and it was so poor quality that I was pretty surprised someone with a graduate degree would be citing it. If there are three exclamation marks in the title (“Scientific Study on the Particle Nature of Thoughts – Do Thoughts Matter and Mass!!!”), that’s never a good sign. The author also described a “relationship field” in terms of energy and vibrations and such things. The woo woo element struck me as unnecessary for discussing things like boundaries and attachment styles, but I’m sure that framing interrelatedness that way will be helpful for some readers.

The book focuses on a process the author calls SLOW (Seeing, Labelling, Opening, and Welcoming), and there is a chapter devoted to each step in that process. Seeing is about being aware of what’s going on inside of you. Labelling involves writing down your thoughts and labelling the associated rumination cycle type, triggers, and attachment fears. The book differentiates between thoughts that are facts and pseudofacts (i.e. opinions, judgments, assumptions, or expectations). I’m used to the acceptance and commitment therapy idea that thoughts are not facts, full stop, so the thoughts=facts thing threw me off a bit.

The Opening step is about anchoring in the present and exploring what’s underlying ruminative thoughts, and the Welcome step is about being vulnerable and allowing your emotions.

Another thing that threw me off a bit was talking about “palliative care” in the context of relationships. The author was using palliative in the sense of the Google definition “relieving pain without dealing with the cause of the condition.” However, “palliative care” is “an approach that improves the quality of life of patients… who are facing problems associated with life-threatening illness” (World Health Organization). Having worked in health care, that’s what comes to mind for me, although linking a relationship and a terminal illness probably isn’t what the author was after.

Some of the chapters were a little on the long side for me, although that’s mostly because my concentration isn’t very good, so that probably doesn’t apply more generally. The case examples that were presented didn’t feel particularly natural to me, but then again, I’ve been single for a good long while, so what do I know? I didn’t feel connected with what the author was saying, and I’m not entirely sure how much of that is the book not really accomplishing what it set out to do and how much is the author and me just looking at the world differently. Perhaps it’s some of both, but I’m leaning more heavily towards the latter. The author has three previous books with very high ratings on Amazon, so clearly her approach works well for a lot of people.

A MUST READ for any overthinker!! I've worked on trying not to overthink everything in my life for years and I am a total work in progress. When it comes to a relationship with my boyfriend, I drive him crazy with my overthinking, which often leads to our biggest arguments. I've had abusive past relationships and that leads to a lot of overthinking and mistrust. I've also had trauma as a child so there is a lot to get over to enable a healthy relationship. I am always looking for books to help me with this.

I really enjoyed reading Stop Overthinking Your Relationship!! I loved the exercises and all the points made throughout the short book that I will put into practice starting today!! I won't give up on having healthy relationships!! Nobody should give up......this book with get you started down the right path!!

Thank you NetGalley and New Harbinger Publications for this e-ARC in exchange for my honest review.

I think I'm the queen of overthinking, ruminating, you name it..and especially when it comes to relationships. Any kind of relationships. I really enjoyed reading this book. It was short and very helpful. I have generalized anxiety disorder, have had past traumatic relationships, and I believe these are the main causes of my overthinking. It is so very difficult for me to not overthink in relationships. I always feel as though I'm going to sabotage every relationship I have because of my past experiences. I could really connect with this book and loved how it explained how ruminating turns into repetitive negative thinking. I really appreciated the solo exercises in this book as well. Extremely helpful and would highly recommend!

I really enjoyed reading this! It was very helpful and uplifting and it’s really helped me already. Highly recommend!

I totally agree with most points the guidebook gives and now it's time to focus on what would work best instead of what could go wrong in a relationship.

Thank you, New Harbinger Publications Inc, for the advance reading copy.

The guidebook has short very realistic nine chapters which focuses on relationship rumination and how to deal with it in the following subsequent chapters. I would say there are a lot of things most of us do not take into consideration more important things leading us to focus on less important things in a relationship.

Do check out this book for the helpful practical tips.

I absolutely adore the cover and I find the references really helpful.

I really enjoyed this book. I frequently overthink I my relationship with my boyfriend after years of having unhealthy relationships in my family. This book really helped put a lot into perspective for me. And it helped to give me things to work on to get my mind off of overthinking. I am glad there were worksheets throughout the book to understand more about myself.

I highly recommend this to anyone in a relationship who overthinks even slightly!

If you’re aware that you fall into the trap of overthinking and ‘ruminating’ about your relationship, then this is the book for you. It explains, in simple terms, why you’ve formed this habit, how to break it, and how to move forward. There are relevant tasks throughout the book, solo and partner, to help challenge your thinking habits, and discover a new, healthier way to be.

Thank you to New Harbinger Publications, Inc. and Netgalley for an eARC of this book to read and review