Thank you St Martins Press for this book! Clover is one of the most interesting characters I have read in a while, a death doula with such a resonant connection with death, such a respectful approach to those who need her most, that she is forgetting perhaps to see the living and life around her. I loved how this book gave such a thoughtful development of Clover with insights into her thoughts; Mikki Brammer shows thoughtful restraint and balance with voicing a character who is struggling socially, making her sympathetic and caring, a bit quirky perhaps, without making her hard to relate to. I was reminded of a favorite author, Laurie Frankel, and how she gives voice to different types of characters.
There is such a lovely story in here, with Clover finding herself at a crossroads, in a good way, where she can begin to see how much she offers many people, not just those nearing the end of life.

Grief is just love looking for a place to settle.

Synopsis:

Clover Brooks is a 36-year-old death doula living in NYC, whose job it is to provide comfort, support and a listening ear to the dying. Her interest in death began in kindergarten when her teacher collapsed and died in front of the class and was reinforced by her parents’ accidental deaths a year later. She’s not morbid, but rather sees death as a natural part of life that she can help people process in their final days. The only problem is that she herself seems to have forgotten to LIVE.

Raised by her now-deceased grandfather, she’s never had a romantic relationship or friendships with peers and only socializes with one of her grandfather’s friends named Leo. When a new uninhibited tenant named Sylvie moves into her building and a man named Sebastian hires her to care for his 91-year-old dying grandmother, Claudia, Clover’s world begins to open up. She’s used to being the one to teach others, but Sylvie, Sebastian and particularly Claudia, may just teach Clover a thing or two about living!

My Thoughts:

Mikki Brammer’s debut novel is beautifully written and has a thoughtful, almost philosophical feel to it. The blurb compares it to Matt Haig’s The Midnight Library, and I can see that. It addresses a topic that, frankly, most of us probably don’t want to think about or discuss much, yet ultimately draws the focus far more to the idea of living life fully. Yes, it addresses aspects of death and dying that may make people sensitive to that topic uncomfortable, but it also promotes the idea of appreciating your life and living it well! It was fun to see Clover’s world open up over the course of the story.

Speaking of Clover, she isn’t easy to like at times. She’s guarded and mistrustful due to a lifetime of being misunderstood, yet she’s also kind-hearted and caring towards those in her care, and the few people she’s willing to open her heart to. Her relationship with Claudia was genuinely touching, as were her interactions with 87-year-old Leo. Her budding friendship with Sylvie was mostly fun as well. I didn’t like Sebastian, but someone enters the story later who did win my heart! Ultimately, Clover’s character arc made my heart happy, and I can see why some compare her to Eleanor Oliphant.

Overall, it was a wonderful debut. Some parts dragged just a little and a couple characters’ death scenes felt a bit unrealistic - I just don’t believe they’d have that kind of clarity in their dying moments to impart all those bits of advice to Clover, but that said, the thoughts were still touching and brought tears to my eyes! I’ll definitely be watching for Brammer’s future books.

★★★★

“ Grief is just love looking for a place to settle.”

For a book that focuses on death and dying, I found myself laughing and smiling for Clover, our main character. She is a death doula who cares for the dying with grace and dignity. She can’t quite admit to herself that she surrounds herself with death so that she doesn’t have to focus on what’s right in front of her.

I recommend this book to anyone who has lost someone, as it has gems of wisdom on how to handle grief and the pain of losing those we love.

A Books Are Magical podcast episode featuring this novel will be released on May 9th.

Spotify link to our podcast:

https://open.spotify.com/show/6d2Y4FA6LRS0LxFHh9L8Z2?si=3HcfPxMJQWeLx7SRbVeyRA&dd=1

I feel like this is one of those books that sticks with you long after you read it. It's a reminder to live life to the fullest and enjoy life, so you have no regrets when your time comes.

Clover has an interesting career, a death doula. She provides support and sometimes companionship to people who are near the end of their lives. She first experienced death at age 5, when her kindergarten teacher died, and then at age 6 when her parents died on a trip to China. She then spent the rest of her childhood living with her grandfather. Clover is fascinated with death, and customs of different cultures related to death.

Clover is excellent at her job, but her social life is clearly lacking. She had traveled the world learning about death and other cultures. But when her grandfather died while she was away, she returned to live in their once shared apartment and strives to make sure others don't die alone. She is very introverted and a bit socially awkward.

Then Clover takes on a new client, Claudia. And I adored her. We watch Clover struggle a bit when she's pushed out of her comfort zone. But we see her grow so much as a person, finding friendship and possibly even romance.

This was an excellent debut and I look forward to more from this author.

Many thanks to NetGalley, St. Martin's Press and MacMillan Audio for an ARC and ALC in exchange for my honest review.

So many things we might regret in our lives and yet as death approaches we reminisce and often wonder what could have been.

Clover Brooks, was a young kindergarten student when she witnessed the untimely death of her teacher. Being an only child and an orphan due to the death of her parents, she learns early on about the fragility of connections to others, Clover avoids connections. At thirty-six, after the loss of her beloved grandfather, she becomes a death doula.

She meets Sebastian at a death cafe, and he hires her to be with his lovely grandmother, Claudia. As we learn of the life Claudia lived, we find her regrets and a bond rises up between Clover and Claudia. Claudia teaches Clover that a person needs to embrace life, and not seclude oneself in books, or her grandfather' apartment. Allowing oneself to look forward to what comes and cherishing the words of the soon to be departed., allows one to see that we are here and the now for us is happening all around.

This sweet story touched my heart and encouraged me to always look forward with the realization that this one life has meaning both from our past and definitely from our future. The charm of our lives is that we are here and shouldn't we make the most of that amazing opportunity?

Many thanks to Mikki Brammer, Macmillon Audio, (narrated by Jennifer Pickens, and NetGalley for the ability to listen to this gentle story)

* I received an ARC of this book from NetGalley. Thank you NetGalley and the publisher for this book. All thoughts are my own.

I liked the message of this book the most - go out and live your life. Everyone has regrets when they die and Clover has a whole notebook full. I wish Clover had been 10 years younger, she’s both mature but equally immature and does not have any relationships other than her neighbor Leo, which makes for a really lonely life. She struggled to make friends as a child and then stopped putting herself out there so she avoids getting to know people. I also felt like the story was a little slow to start, but once we meet Claudia it picks up.

Would recommend.

I just love Clover!

I had no idea until this book that death doulas were real. I was so intrigued I started looking things up. Always the sign of a good story.

Clover’s job gives her a close seat to death as she accompanies people in their final days. Sometimes that is just sitting with them, sometimes that is helping them make amends, write letters, or just remember good times.

In being good at her job, Clover has forgotten how to live her own life. She does try new things, but she has a hard time letting people in. She does best keeping things at surface level. That is until she meets people who force her to take a look at her own life and reevaluate.

This was such a great story and I was sad to tell Clover goodbye. With all of the loss in my own life the past couple of years, this book spoke to me in a unique way and I am so glad it was written.

Thank you to St. Martin’s Press for the copy of this book. All views are my honest opinion.

“Grief is just love looking for a place to settle.”

OH just OH! I’m not entirely sure this is what I expected when I requested an ARC from NetGalley… and I think there might have been a time or two when I questioned how much I actually liked it… and then… oh and then. It’s a slow start and Clover isn’t easy to get to know… and when you do get to know her, she’s kind of annoying. She’s annoying until you understand her and then I’m not sure there is a single one of us who isn’t able to relate to exactly how she feels. Loss and grief, regrets and guilt- we all experience it.

I have lost many people and this book is one I will reread again and probably again after that.

“And instead of constantly asking ourselves the question of why we’re here, maybe we should be savoring a simpler truth: We are here.”

Thank you NetGalley.

I absolutely adored Clover as a character in Brammer's debut novel "Regrets". She is a relatable, lovable protagonist who lives as a social recluse, finding solace in books and the concept of death. Despite experiencing grief and loss, Clover uses her own experiences to help others, even at the expense of her own happiness. Brammer makes it effortless for readers to connect with Clover from the very beginning, making it easy to empathize with her choices.
The book's premise might suggest a heavy and gloomy read, but Brammer presents an uplifting and life-affirming story that explores the taboo subject of death through a thought-provoking plot. While there are romantic storylines in "Regrets", Brammer keeps them in the background, using them as a way for Clover to find her true self and create the life she desires.
I appreciated how each chapter in the novel had a lasting impact, and how Brammer brought the story to a positive and delightful conclusion. "Regrets" is refreshingly creative and unique, setting itself apart from other novels in the genre. I eagerly anticipate Brammer's next work and hope to see more of Clover in the future.

The Collected Regrets of Clover is a heartfelt novel about Clover, a death doula, who spends the majority of her life caring for others’ needs and ignoring her own. Faced with death from a young age, Clover has always handled the concept better than others around her, but while listening to regrets of the dying she cares for, her own regrets are piling up without her realizing it.

This book is a wonderful look at what it means to live consciously as though we’re going to die. Character development was strong here with many characters—often quirky—with endearing traits. The book hit a lull in the middle and could have been a bit shorter. Overall, the present to past reflective shift really works throughout.

After finishing The Collected Regrets of Clover this week I actually found myself struggling to pick up something new because I didn't think it would hold up to this novel. Definitely a case of a book hangover.
.
The characters are well developed and the story itself is quite unique. I honestly don't think I've ever read a novel where the main character is a death doula. It was fascinating and compassionate and all in all just a beautifully written book. If you loved Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine, Ghosts, or Lessons in Chemistry, I think this book will be a good match for you.

Thank you to the author, Mikki Brammer, publisher St. Martins Press and NetGalley for an advanced copy of The Collected Regrets of Clover.

I was very excited to read TCROC after reading the summary . Clover is a 36 year old death doula living in NYC. She lives a lonely life after the passing of her grandfather years ago, who seemingly raised her , after her parents death.

I wanted to love this book, but it ended up being just ok, to me . I think I am a tough critic partly because of my own profession as a nurse. But there were some aspects that were a little far fetched and plot lines that seemed under developed . (I don’t want to give away spoilers). Aside from that, I did like the overall message. I would give this book a 3 out of 5 star review.

Clover is unusual in that she is 36 and has no friends, has never been kissed, lives in an apartment surrounded by her deceased grandfather’s things and works as a death doula. She is also smart, well-read and well-travelled, but leads a small life detached from her feelings and insights around her own life, in spite of her profession.

All and all, I have a lot of mixed feelings about this read. Clover’s character didn’t make sense to me and her path to finding herself felt unrealistic as well. What she needed was a good therapist! But somehow with a little help from her clients, neighbors and possible love interests, she figures it all out. These relationships propel the storyline, and are alternately piercing and heartwarming.

The last third of the book is a delight, which makes up a bit for the slow beginning. Clover’s growth is monumental, and the fairy tale ending is sweet. The writing also matures with relevancy, and there are some insightful nuggets about death throughout.

If you think you’d like a coming of age story for a quirky 36 year old, this book might very well charm you.

I received an ARC of this book in exchange for an honest review.

Know that feeling when you finish a really good book and it makes you smile? This is one of those books.

"But the secret to a beautiful death is to live a beautiful life. Putting your heart out there. Letting it get broken. Taking chances. Making mistakes."

Love the writing. And Clover.

Thanks to the wonderful folks at NetGalley for a chance to read an advanced copy of this marvelous book.

Plain and simple, this book is about a Death Doula. Clover is a Death Doula who helps people in the last moments of their life.

I have no idea what compelled me to choose a book on this subject. It's not a depressing story. In fact, it is actually full of hope. I love the fact that Death Doulas exist to help dying people achieve a level of peace

Clover is a very unusual character. She is an introvert. She is approaching middle age but has never had an intimate relationship. Just because it has never happened. It is hard to figure her out.

I find it difficult to relate to Clover. Without going into a lot of detail, Clover lost both parents in an accident when she was six. Her parents were never present for her. But, she lived with her grandfather, who was a good person in her life. Her main interest in life is death. She watched her kindergarten teacher die and was the only child in the class that did not panic. But it started her fascination.

This book is not fast paced. It is definitely character driven. While I did find some of Clover's musings insightful and I loved that she tried to learn something from each client's death, I just could not identify with her. I didn’t dislike her. I just didn't feel any affinity for her. And because of this, I can't drum up any excitement for the book.

I've always maintained that not every book is for everybody. This was not the book for me.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the Advance Readers Copy.

4.5/5⭐️

This story is centered on Clover, a 36-year-old woman in NYC who works as a death doula. It chronicles her life (beginning at age 6) and shows the evolution of how circumstances and those around her influenced her choice of this unusual career.

I really enjoyed this book. It is so well-written I found myself highlighting many beautiful/poignant passages throughout. And Clover is portrayed as how I’d picture the perfect companion at one’s death, highly empathetic, pragmatic, and always with her clients’ best interests and needs/desires at heart. But her path in life was not a smooth one. She faced her own obstacles and heartaches and is lonely as she finds it hard to allow anyone close. We watch as she slowly begins to realize that she must live life before she regrets its loss. And those characters along the way who help her do this are warmly wonderful in their own ways as they are just who she needs in her life to help pull her out of herself.

It's a unique book…the subject of death, how we feel about it and how we face it. This story brings home the need/desire in all of us to have an ending filled with dignity, self-possession, and love.

There will probably be tears (and definitely smiles and laughter) but these are the hallmark of most worthy books. And of course, there’s a feel-good, lovely ending. And as this one is a debut, I’m excited for more from this talented author.

Definitely recommended.

My sincere thanks to the author, NetGalley and St. Martin’s Press for providing the free early arc of The Collected Regrets of Clover for review. The opinions are strictly my own.

"What's the point of giving someone a beautiful death if you can't give yourself a beautiful life?"

I am absolutely blown away by this debut. You might read the synapsis and expect a story about a death doula to be morbid, depressing or exploitive but I am here to tell you THE COLLECTED REGRETS OF CLOVER is far from that. This book transforms the stigmas surrounding dying into something beautiful to celebrate. It's an uplifting story about life, death and the journeys in between.

Clover, a thirtysomething death doula, is one of the most likable and memorable characters I've met in a long time. She is a midwife of sorts to those exiting the world (vs entering it) and that alone had me curious as to how and why she chose this career. Because Clover dedicates so much of her time to the dying, she hasn't really lived a life of her own. Instead, she turns inward and keeps everyone at arm's length. When a feisty old woman's final wish sends Clover on a trip across the country, she is finally forced to examine her own life.

This book conveys such a beautiful message without feeling cliched or forced. I appreciate the author’s ability to shed light on sensitive topics such as aging, loneliness and grief. The exploration of death and how different cultures & families deal with it was handled in such an expert way that I never once felt like it crossed a line. This also serves as a gentle reminder that grief is different for everyone and there is no time stamp for how long it lasts.

Clover's story inspired me. To look at my own life. To cross something off my bucket list. To take that trip. To say that thing I've been holding inside. To live with no regrets. I’m positive you haven’t read a book like this one, so do yourself a favor and pick it up on May 9th.

Overall the book was okay, I just couldn’t find myself connecting to clover. It’s default a slow Burn and there were many times I wanted to DNF, but I stuck through it. Not my favorite book, but overall it was good

The Collected Regrets of Clover
Mikki Brammer
5⭐️

“Learn from my mistakes, my darling.” Each word was quieter, more staccato than the last. “Don’t let the best parts of life pass you by because you’re too scared of the unknown.” One last wink. “Be cautiously reckless.”

💐 ʙʀɪᴇғ sʏɴᴏᴘsɪs
Clover a 36 year-old death doula spends so much time with the dying that she has no life of her own, until the final wishes of a feisty old woman send Clover on a trip across the country to uncover a forgotten love story––and perhaps, her own happy ending.

💐 ᴍʏ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛs:
I absolutely adored this debut! It’s a unique and beautifully written story not just about death, but about living and celebrating life to the fullest. Grief is complicated and complex, and I loved they way in which it’s addressed in this story. As an individual process and not something that is quantifiable and to be fixed. It’s time to start normalizing that it truly never goes away, it just takes on a different shape in our lives.

Brammer created a wonderful cast of well developed characters. I truly adored Clover and Claudia and will continue to think about them long after reading.

The Collected Regrets of Clover publishes May 9th, and I would absolutely recommend this heartwarming read.

💐Thank you to NetGalley and St. Martin’s Press for the advanced copy in exchange for my honest review.

I have no idea why I requested The Collected Regrets of Clover since the description describes a book full of melancholy. My mother’s death is ten months past, yet the grief is still there. I wasn’t sure I could handle a book that dealt with death in such a frank way. Yet I persevered, and I’m glad I read the book.

The story follows Clover, a death doula. What is one, exactly? They are sort of like a hospice worker, but less medical and more emotional. They try to ease one’s passing by talking to them and listening to anything they may not want to say to family or friends. Sometimes they have requests that Clover tries to fulfill, and sometimes they have regrets which they lay out, sometimes it’s simple funeral planning, or just holding their hand so they don’t lie alone. Clover keeps track of them in journals and tries to act on them from time to time, whether it’s something simple like “I never dyed my hair blue like I wanted to” to “I wish I went to the park more.”

In flashbacks, we learn that Clover’s parents died when she was six, and she ended up living with her grandfather. This turns out to be a good thing as it sounds like her parents didn’t let parenthood from holding them back from leaving Clover with the neighbors and traveling for months on end for work. Clover’s grandfather is a professor at Columbia University and has a set life: Thursday night faculty meetings, Sunday mornings at the cafe’, then a visit to the bookstore, where only one book can be purchased per week.

Clover’s grandfather died while she was studying abroad, and thirteen years have passed. There’s an African-American man, Leo, that lives in her building that she’s friendly with, but other than that, she’s shut off from the world. She does her job, and lives the life of a hermit, basically. The only time she goes out is to find a death cafe’, which is a meeting in a cafe’ where people talk openly about death. Apparently they’re a thing in bigger cities; can’t say our city has ever had one, but now with the book coming out, maybe the local independent bookstore would have one.

At one cafe’ Clover meets an over-eager man named Sebastian, who she can not wait to get away from. The problem is he shows up at the next death cafe’ she attends in another part of New York City. After talking for a bit, she reveals her real reason for coming to the cafe’s, and he announces that he needs to hire her for his grandmother, who has terminal cancer. Grandma Claudia was a trail-blazer in her day, one of the only female photographers around in the early 1950s.But she hung it all up when she married Sebastian’s grandfather.

Meanwhile, a young woman has moved into the building, Sylvie, who coaxes Clover out of her shell by taking her out for coffee and yoga. Clover starts to realize that she’s led a secluded life because she was afraid of rejection. Sylvie tries to help her see that there’s far less rejection than one would think. Claudia also helps Clover spread her wings by talking about her past as a photographer, and a scandalous affair she had while in Corsica while she was engaged to Sebastian’s grandfather.

As the book progresses, Clover faces some hard truths about her life through the relationships she’s forged. She realizes she’s still got some growing up to do, and plenty of life to experience. And with the help of her new friends, she does. This book ended much more on a high note than the beginning, where I was dreading reading about death so much. Because ultimately the book is about life and living it to the fullest.

I received a copy of this book from NetGalley and St. Martin’s Press in exchange for an honest review. All opinions expressed are my own.