How amazing it is that we finally have an ace nonfiction aimed at acespecs? (rather than an educational asexuality 101?) It's a cute little book filled with great tips for all the ace-specs out there. Like the title suggests, it's full of lists, tips, interviews and art to help aces function in this allonormative world.

One note is that I'd definitely recommend a physical copy as it's a book that you want to be able to easily browse. It would also make looking up illustrations easier.

Brb, buying a million copies of this so I don't have to explain myself to people! I wish I had had access to a book like this when I was growing up. Maybe then it wouldn't have taken me until I was 25 to figure out my sexuality. I am so glad we are getting more representation and resources!

If this book proved anything it is this…THERE ARE NOT ENOUGH RESOURCES FOR ASPEC IDENTITIES!

I have read many asexual non fiction books this year and many of them reference the same material and the same few “Ace Celebrities” with just different quotes. This isn’t any fault of author, but more an observation and fault of the society we live in.

Ace Notes is another YA geared (at least to me) Ace nonfiction. It wasn’t memorable, but it had the pieces to be. The biggest drawback for me were lengthy interview transcripts and the random drawings. Both served a purpose, but they felt misplaced.

Thank you NetGalley, Michele Kirichanskaya, and Jessica Kingsley Publishers for the opportunity to read this eARC for an honest review!

Ace Notes by Michele Kirichanskaya releases March 21, 2023!

Rating 3.5/5

This book is one of the most accessible non fiction books I've read about asexuality. It's written in a way that makes it helpful not only to those within the ace community, but would also make a great resource for an ally. I intend to recommend it to my Mom who is just learning about asexuality.

I really appreciated the references to current pop culture icons in the community, including bloggers, TikTokers, and webcomic artists.

My only caveat is that the overall organization seemed a bit messy in places. Some chapters read like run ons, but that is also what makes it accessible.

I was a little disappointed by this book.
It has interesting information here and there but overall it feels very surface-level.

I was hoping for something informative or something more personal and it's none of that. A section is the author sharing thoughts on ace symbols, which can be investigated rather than speculated.

Also, there are so many quotes that are not expanded upon as if they speak for themselves, which was a wasted opportunity to give this book more depth.
A personal pet peeve of mine is the pop references, and this book is full of them. I think this will feel outdated in a few years because it's not explaining why it is there (for example: "the dreaded HOUSE episode).

On the bright side, I loved the interviews even if the author was so self-centered that she constantly brought in her own experiences.
And continuing with the positive, I enjoyed how intersectional this book feels, and how it explains that labels are fluid.

I think that with more editing, this could be a better book (there were a lot of formatting issues: some sections had the wrong page title, some words were cut incorrectly, the endnotes were missing the chapter name and the index was missing, I'm guessing that's because it's an ARC and will be fixed in the final product).
Another thing that can be benefited from better editing is organization, some topics came back chapters later without connection, and some concepts and metaphors were repeated all the time. The sections seemed to be written out of order and just pasted together.

Overall it was a messy reading experience, I love there are more books about acespec but this one it's a mixed bag.

Ace notes is a perfect gift for someone who just found out about their ace identity. It covers a lot of topics in an engaging writing style which makes it hard to stop reading.

The information is broken up with interviews, which probably makes it easier to read for most, but for me the interviews took me out of the narrative, and the way they were set up was a bit long winded as the author expressed her own experiences in between questions.

There was a lot of information, it seems like everything is covered very thoroughly as far as I know, and I learned quite a lot new things. I think this is a very accessible guide to the ace spectrum that many people will enjoy reading. I liked the pop culture references and the meandering into the realms of fanfiction and Jewish religion.

The downside for me (beside the interviews which is really personal preference), is the structure. It’s very hard to find something you were specifically looking for. It feels like it is one big monologue. It’s won’t bother you so much if you read it front to back, but for specific questions it might be a bit difficult. It truly is a sort of collection of notes, which is precisely what the title already indicated. I recommend this book for everyone, but especially if you’re searching or just discovered your identity.

I received a free e-arc through Netgalley, but it hasn’t influenced my opinions.

This book provides good advice for asexual people. I really liked the intersectional religion section. There was some very interesting insight on Judaism.

I received an eARC of this book for review from the Jessica Kingsley Publishers via NetGalley, all opinions are my own.

• The Brief: This introduction to asexuality offers basic terminology definitions along with interview transcriptions strategically placed to expand on the chapter themes.
• It (mostly) succeeds in is mission to offer advice to asexuals finding their path, and would be helpful for those just starting their understanding of the orientation. Much of the material related to defining attraction and relationships can be found in more accessible publications.

Ace Notes is an informative but not groundbreaking text. Kirichanskaya’s incorporates casual language and academic formatting style to support her writing. For me, the result is slightly discordant. The copy I received was incomplete as well, with the end notes missing chapter labels and an empty index page. There are a few areas in Ace Notes that were more successful, such as the in-depth section on consent and an interesting examination of Judaism and asexuality. There are good observations here along with new content such as the multiple interviews with people on the asexual spectrum. Final likes: discussions on representation in fanfic and the list of additional readings, mostly fiction books.

There are a number of things in Ace Notes that don’t work for me. The parenthetical remarks became annoying, even though I generally like their usage in fiction. For me, nonfiction book don’t need snarky author commentary about their own conclusions. The organization left something to be desired, topic changes were jarring. The section How to Identify an Asexual was off-putting to me because it relied on assumptions rather than direct communication. Having said this, it isn’t a bad book but I did find it uneven.

This does what it says on the tin - it is written as a guide for ace people. It was refreshing to read something written by an ace person for ace people. It manages to be easily digestible whilst still being comprehensive and informative. As someone who knows quite a bit about this topic, I still learnt some new things. At times this felt like reading my inner monologue, which was definitely an interesting experience. I loved that it showed that being ace is a nuanced and complex thing and the interview sections with a wide range of people were particularly nice to see.

I pretty recently realised that I'm on the ace spectrum and this book has really helped me understand my own asexuality a lot better.
There were a lot of things about my asexuality that didn't make sense to me, until I read this book. Like the part about fanfiction. Like I am in no way interested in having sex, but I really enjoyed reading smutty fanfiction or literature if it's not too spicy.

One part I also really related to was the part about how the author felt the need to cover up. I felt the exact same why when I was younger and sometimes still do. I spend a great deal of my teenage years dressing in oversized clothes and sometimes even going full boy, with short hair, binders and everything, because then I didn't feel as sexualised and I did when my clothes showed of my female body. At that time I was really confused and at some point even started considering if I was transsexual, but I never actually felt like a male. I just didn't want to be sexualised and that what was happened when I dressed feminine.

Thank you for writing this book and thank you for introducing so many different aces throughout your book! I will highly recommend this book for anyone who identify as ace, who is currently questioning their sexuality/asexuality, who knows someone who is ace and want to understand it better or just in general to any one who doesn't understand what asexuality is and want to learn more about it.

As someone who thought they were ace, this is a book that can definitely help anyone questioning or who just wants to learn more. Having books on asexual identities is helpful for everyone because it helps everyone understand that not everyone wants to have sex or will only have sex after a deep emotional connection.

I had a really hard time giving feedback on this book because on my Kindle app, it's formatting was just so off. Words would be cut in the middle of a word and go onto a new line, text colors would randomly change and become illegible for large parts of the book, links and images wouldn't formal properly and instead would also take up too much space on the page. It was extremely tiring and frustrating to read this and I simply gave up. Because of this, I cannot give this book a review.

This was a great book for people who are new to the Asexual spectrum or questioning if thay may be on it. I love how there is more and more ace-centered books coming out now that celebrate the experiences of being Ace, and this is a great rec for someone who just came out! Especially enjoyed the discussion on metaphors to explain to family and friends what being Ace means, the split attraction model lesson, and the interviews with older aces in the community that shows this movement isn't just some internet fad. The discussion on coming out- or not coming out- was something I wish I'd read years ago after disastrous attempts at coming out myself in the workplace and facing daily criticism even now for it.

This book covers some really important topics within asexuality, particularly where it intersects with other communities such as disability, faith, and BIPOC. It could be a helpful resource for people learning about asexuality and the impact of society.

An even mix of pros and cons make this a dead center three-star read for me.

Pros:
1. The interviews! Hearing from diverse ace voices in depth was a real treat.

2. The discussion of fanfic also intrigued me. I"m not acquainted with fanfic myself, but I appreciated learning how it can be a haven for aro/ace readers.

Cons:
1. Excessive use of scare quotes and parentheses. This got to be like the friend who uses air quotes umpteen times in every conversation. After a while, they just don't mean anything anymore.

2. A really muddled explanation of arousal vs. attraction vs. desire that confuses more than it clarifies.

I was very excited to apply for an ARC of this book, as I am a thirty-something who only recently started to understand that I am ace. The title and description pulled me in and I was looking forward to learning more about this part of myself from someone who understands.

Unfortunately, I was totally disappointed by this book.

Although there are little nuggets of useful information, this book relies heavily on large chunks of quotes from other resources (books, articles, Tumblr posts, etc) and there is a big focus on signposting to other resources (charities, helplines, other books, tv shows, etc). It is my opinion that the original content in this book is lacking and disproportionate to the amount of copy-and-paste from other sources. Further, the quoted sections are not expanded upon, but left to speak for themselves. The author doesn't seem to engage with the quoted content to elaborate, add original thoughts, or give a fleshed-out opinion on the text.

I found the format of the book very strange. To me, there doesn't seem to be a plan or a flow to the book, as chapters don't seem to follow any sort of logical flow. It reads like a disjointed collection of blog posts and makes for an uncomfortable read.

Further discomfort came in the form of spelling errors. I don't think I would have mentioned this if I had been enjoying the book, but when I was already struggling with it, the phrase "lust at first *SITE*" just jumped off the page and made me cringe. Also, referring to "the aspec spectrum"... doesn't "aspec" mean "asexual spectrum"? So, "asexual spectrum spectrum"?

I did find the interview with Maia Kobabe very interesting. Funnily enough, I only read Gender Queer last month and I thoroughly enjoyed it, so hearing more from Maia was great. Including this interview was a good call by the author. However, I found the subsequent interview with Shari B. Ellis excruciating. Not because of Shari, but because the author included *so* much of herself just making long statements or telling stories about herself. So much so, that Shari could often only give one or two word replies, as there were no questions put forward. It was extremely uncomfortable to read.

I made it to page 95 of 288 before I finally hit my wall. Totally subjective, but I was just done and I found myself dreading picking up the book again. So, full disclosure, I skimmed from page 96 to page 288. I realise some will think this disqualifies me from reviewing this book, but I think it's important to note that I, as an ace person, went into this thinking I would love it, wanting to learn from it, but the first third of the book put me off so much that I just couldn't read the rest.

The author is clearly passionate about this topic and I really do appreciate the attempt to provide information and increase the number of resources out there for people who are ace or questioning. But personally, I just didn't like it, even though I really wanted to.

I wish the author well and I hope there is time to consider the ARC feedback and perhaps make some changes before publication. As it stands, I just can't give this book anything higher than one star, as much as it pains me to do so to an author who clearly cares so deeply about the ace community. I genuinely hope to see this author hone her craft in the future.

First off, I should say that I'm an Ace person reviewing this so I'm already well aware of what being Ace means since I am.

I went into Ace Notes really excited! Tips and Tricks of how to survive in this sex obsessed world? Sign me up! How did Kirichanskaya figure it out, tell me your secrets! This book...isn't that. Ace Notes is about everything asexuality and I mean everything, to the point of being meandering and I forgot what I was reading. I liked that there were interviews with real Ace folks, that the author gave mini history on things like Ace symbols and popular misconceptions, but this book just wasn't for me. However I am absolutely positive that this book is going to change a lot of people! This is the book for people who want to know everything in one place without having to Google anything!

As an allo (what’s that? You’ll have to read the book!) learning more about asexuality, I thought this was a really useful guide. If you prefer bite-size informative essays, lists, and interviews over narrative-style nonfiction books like Angela Chen’s Ace or a dense academic book, this is probably the right choice. It is probably best read and used like a reference book: if read in a linear way, you might find the organization of the book a bit haphazard. The essays and interviews seemed to repeat sometimes and the choice of where to put which sections had a chaotic feel. It could probably use a bit of editing to help it feel easier to navigate. Still, if you are hunting for a particular piece of ace-related information or an encouraging interview, you’ll find it in here! I will be happy to have this in my ace reading library as a quick reference guide.

I am landing somewhere between 2 and 3 stars for this book, I have a lot of thoughts about it, so let's jump right in.

The Good
I'm going to start off with the good here, because even with the issues I had, this book had a lot of good things, even some new ideas that I haven't seen covered as much in other books.

This book covered the primary vs secondary attraction model, which honestly, is something I've never heard of before. Essentially this can be used with grey or demi attractions, that ace or aro is the primary attraction with a secondary attached. I believe this section also talked about the different types of love represented in Greek mythology as well as in the Greek language, which lends some interesting historical and cultural views to the discussion.

This book contains multiple interviews with different members of the ace community, ones that (if you're familiar with the community) you may know well (such as Maia Kobabe and Julia Sondra Decker). I think it's really great to get a diverse perspective of the community and the experiences throughout, especially when discussing intersectionality in the book. Each person brought unique stories and perspectives that are incredibly valuable to see just how true it is that asexuality is not a monolith.

In a similar vein, this book provided so many resources throughout as well as an enormous list in the back of books, movies, TV, and videos. It can be difficult and intimidating trying to find resources, so the fact that they're laid out so plainly is excellent.

Part of this book also touches on the intersection of religion and asexuality, and the author covers a lot about asexuality (and really sexuality in general) and Judaism.

The Bad
As much as I wanted to like this book more and as much as I loved different sections of it, I did have some problems with the structure of the book and how some things were presented.

I think my number one issue with this book was with the structure of it. I read an ARC of this book, so I know it still has edits to go through before publishing, and I really hope they fix a lot of these issues. This book was very much written out of order, in sections, and then assembled without looking. There are so many places where entire ideas are repeated almost word for word, it was like dejavu. Not only that, but the order the sections come in makes no sense, with similar topics being divided across the book for seemingly no reason.

Let me illustrate: this book is about asexuality, so I would assume that there would be definitions of terms at the beginning. That did not happen here. The first time the difference between attraction and libido are mentioned is 26% into the book, and that is only a passing comment in an interview. The author doesn't give definitions until 28% in, creating a mess of confusion. Even then, the order that different terms are presented in makes no sense and provided no flow of information in a logical manner.

The beginning of the book, rather than giving clear descriptions of what asexuality is, goes through at least 6 metaphoric stories instead, very clumsily and confusingly trying to say how to explain asexuality to allos.

Even as we get closer to the end and a bit more clear, the jumbled sections and repetition still occurs. There were times that an interview would cover something and immediately after the same story would be told, or the other way around. Some of the interviews also seemed less about the person being interviewed that I would have liked, with the author instead changing the course of discussion to tell her own story rather than letting the interviewee give their perspective (mainly thinking about the last interview with Ellen Huang).

I think that with more editing, this could be a much better book (there were also a lot of bad formatting issues, but I'm sure that will be resolved). At the moment though, with messy or incorrect information and such an unordered and confusing book, it is not it.

I also do want to note that for anyone that reads the book and (like me) never heard of the documentary (A)sexual, please please please understand that it is not an uplifting documentary. There is so much prejudice and aphobia present, they put in so many interviews with people saying horrible things, even showing an LGBT+ activist saying that asexuals don't need to be at pride and they can just stay home without needing to worry about prejudice. It is... Rough. I'd recommend instead reading some of the reviews here.

A refreshingly well-researched and intersectional take on ace rights. I love all the diverse asexual perspectives provided in this accessible text. As someone who identifies as asexual, I found this book to be very affirming as well as comforting. It made me feel seen as well as opening my mind up to understanding the asexual spectrum more. Specifically, I love that Michele Kirichanskaya mentioned Angela Chen's brilliant writing, LGBTQ+ Tumblr discourse, asexual representation in media, and the intersection between mental health and asexuality. Instead of merely glossing over these subject matters, the author dives deeply into their origins and importance. This is an essential read for anyone interested in queer discourse.

Some of my favorite quotes:

"When a person hides in The Closet, we act as if it is their responsibility to come out. But when a snail hides in its shell, we don't delegate responsibility the same way. A snail only hides in its shell because the world outside feels hostile. If a snail recoils at the sight of you, it's not because you are cowardly or lying or deviant or withholding, it's because the world and people around us feel predatory."

"I think there's room for aces to be childlike and goofy versus being infantilized."

"There's that stereotype that we're all sex-negative, that we're all virgins, that we don't date, that we're robotic."

"By saying 'more than a friend,' one intentionally or unintentionally undermines the value or friendship by suggesting that bonds that are not romantically intimate in nature are lesser."

"Neuroticism itself is said to be associated with various negative effects, including 'anger, anxiety, self-consciousness, irritability, emotional instability, and depression,' which, unfortunately, are things that are not uncommon within the asexual community...which comes first: neuroticism from being ace or neuroticism from existing in a world that erases and pathologizes asexuality while also demanding instantaneous and easy categorization of who and what you are."