Huge thanks to Macmillan Audio and NetGalley for an advanced listening copy of My Darkest Prayer by S. A. Cosby.

After reading Razorblade Tears and now after listening to My Darkest Prayer, S. A. Cosby is an auto-buy author for me. His work is gritty and graphically violent at times yet tenderness makes its way into his stories as well. In My Darkest Prayer, we meet funeral home employee Nathan Waymaker. He is a veteran and former police officer who is still reeling from the murder of his parents. When a local minister is found dead, his parishioners ask Nathan to make sure his death is fully investigated. This small town southern nior tale is full of sinister characters with secrets that they will go to great lengths to keep secret.

The audio was wonderful. Adam Lazarre's deep, soulful voice made it so enjoyable to listen to!

With the success of [book:Razorblade Tears|54860585], S.A. Cosby has reissued his debut and wow the LA Times was not lying when they said this book "proves he was a master from the start".

My Darkest Prayer follows Nathan Haymaker through a twisty plot filled with small town gossip and corruption and it was a joy to read from start to finish. While I didn't love this quite as much as Razorblade Tears, I did like it more than Blacktop Wasteland. Each of the three have heavy focus on characters and themes, but Blacktop Wasteland felt a little too fast paced movie thriller for my tastes.

Cosby's writing is descriptive and emotional and his plots always have me wanting to keep reading. And the way he builds his characters and atmosphere is masterclass. It did not take me very long to get attached to Nathan as a protagonist and I loved Skunk's soft spoken "how many guns will I need" attitude. If Cosby ever wrote a Skunk spin-off I would read that in a heartbeat. I will say that in this particular book there is a lot of objectification of women and that didn't necessarily sit well with me.

The audiobook is narrated by Adam Lazarre-White, who did a fantastic job with the narration as always.

This book has cemented S.A. Cosby as an auto buy author for me and I cannot wait to read [book:All the Sinners Bleed|61884832] when it's released next year!

I fell in love with Cosby's writing after reading Razorblade Tears in 2021. I promptly went out and bought Blacktop Wasteland, and was so stoked to be given an ALC of My Darkest Prayer, a re-release of Cosby's debut novel.

Here we follow Nathan, a retired Marine and ex-LEO, who currently works at a funeral parlor "handling the bodies." Nate also has a side hustle.... Righting wrongs and tying up loose ends when the cops fail to do their jobs.

One of Nate's recent bodies ends up being a well-known, and well-loved, Reverend named Esau Watkins. Esau apparently committed suicide, but those close to him aren't buying it. There were some suspicious things going down in the weeks leading up to the Reverend's death. When Nate agrees to look into the case, he'll uncover some dark and dirty secrets in this small southern town.

Thoughts 💭: This was excellent!! Gritty, dark, a little vulgar, and a lot entertaining! Cosby is such an original voice in the crime thriller genre.

The narrator, Lazarus-White, does a PHENOMENAL job, with the audiobook, as always! 🙌🏻 His voice is so well matched to Nathan's character.

I'll definitely be recommending this one, especially on audio!

Thanks NetGalley and Macmillan for my gifted ALC. ☺️

Some fave quotes:

"Funeral business was the last place where segregation was openly tolerated in America. You can have your interracial marriages and mixed race babies and white hip-hop artist and black rockers, but when you died it was still the amount of melanin in your skin that determined who lowered you into the ground."

"The truth is, no one can be fully protected, There is no such thing as safety. Just downtime between tragedies."

“I took care of the bodies. The bodies with the legs blown off or the hands shredded. The bodies full of ball bearings and nails and whatever some kid could find to build his IED. I loaded the bodies up and dragged them back to the base, then went back out on another patrol and prayed to a God that seemed to be only half-listening that today wasn’t the day that someone would have to take care of my body.”

You can definitely tell that this book was written before Blacktop Wasteland and Razorblade Tears. It’s clear that Cosby has always been a terrific storyteller, but he’s honed both his writing and his tone significantly since this book originally came to be.

Like everything Cosby writes, this book employs masterful storytelling and a flawed but deeply likable protagonist. The bones of the plot are good even if I didn’t love the ickiness of a lot of what was going on here.

The side plot with Lisa was a bit of an eye roll and feels symptomatic of a male writer with some growing up to do. The “every man wants to sleep with a porn star” schtick is just such a cringe. I’m glad Cosby has matured and learned how to write a romantic subplot without seeming like he’s submitting a writing sample for a job at a lad’s mag since this one was written.

That and some clunky prose aside, I do like a revenge novel, and Cosby paints his revenge sequences so well. Satisfying, yet not without cost. The characters are also very well-drawn, even the ones you really, really don’t like. And as for those you do…let’s just say we would all be lucky to have a Skunk along side us.

Audiobook readers: Cosby’s work always seems to translate so well to this format, and this novel is no exception. The narrator was absolutely fantastic.

Thank you to the publishers, author and NetGalley for the free copy of this audio book.

This was well written and fast paced. Not 100% for me but I still enjoyed it! The narrator had the perfect voice for this too.

I thoroughly enjoyed this book. I’ve never read Cosby before but definitely plan to check out his other titles. This one was very well-written and fast-paced, and I liked the fact that the narrator was exceedingly flawed but still redeemable.

I can't believe it took me this long to read S.A. Cosby. This book is right up my alley, a rural noir with a great protagonist.

Nate Waymaker is a former deputy in the Queen County Sherriff's department. You could say Nate did not depart on good terms. Since then he has worked in his cousin Walt's funeral home. He's also known as a man who can solve problems outside of the law.

After the Sherriff's investigation into the death of a shady pastor stalls, two church ladies ask Nate to look into the matter. As Nate investigates he crosses path a whole cast of characters, including a porn star, corrupt cops, the biggest drug lord in the Carolina's and even more shady pastors.

Nate is a great main character. He's physically strong but seems to be at a crossroads and tries not to cross the line into vigilantism. He is a fixture in his community, but exists only on the edges. Cosby gives Nate a unique voice. I can't wait to read more by this author.

The review is not complete without a mention of the audiobook's narrator Adam Lazarre-White. His is the perfect voice for Nathan.

engage with passed off as a supposed suicide, small-town Virginia runs to Nathan Waymaker, former cop and Marine veteran and current funeral home employee, to dig in and find the truth since the cops aren't doing the work.

Nathan is content in his current job as a "body mover" at the funeral home, but he himself has had beef with the local authorities when his parents were killed, and he decides to investigate.

Many secrest of the town come out - the corrupt police force (which to Nathan already was not a secret), a pastor in over his head, and a possible sex cult in the small town.

You will hold your breath, laugh, be in tears, frustrated - this book brings out all the emotions! S.A. Cosby has earned a place on my auto-buy author list.

Many thanks to NetGalley and MacMillan Audio for my ALC in exchange for an honest review.

*4.5 Stars On My Instagram Account*

"Revenge is a confession of pain."

The minute the sexy growl baritone voice of narrator Adam Lazarre-White becomes Nathan Waymaker
with the fiery dialogue from My Darkest Prayer by mind blowing wordsmith S.A.Cosby I knew I had found my new author obsession.

The author has written a few bestsellers but this was my first with his debut novel now available as an audiobook. I'm still a bit dazed with the fast paced nonstop action from original complex morally grey characters who deserve to be in the pop culture lexicon like Walter White.

Starting with purposely burying a dead body in the wrong grave, Nathan, a retired marine and former deputy working in a funeral home, is trying to stay out of trouble BUT... where's their trouble Nathan will find a way into it. He's dealing with the death of his parents by a rich well connected drunk driver who served no jail time thanks to "a paper work error" when a local preacher with a shady past dies and his parishioners ask him to look into his death which seems suspicious and the sheriff is ignoring it.

So begins a whirlwind of crazy with crime bosses, a porn star with a heart, crooked deputies, and a best friend named Skunk who is definitely not on the right side of the law but the one you want on your side when it's all about to blow up in your face.

This writer's words flow without any barriers conjuring up an image that's picture perfect:

"Her body had curves where most women only had hopes and dreams."

What a great line! I can't wait to get my hands on all his books and I will listen to anything Adam Lazarre-White narrates. He seamlessly embodied these characters . My Darkest Prayer is a shining light as a gritty dirty character driven crime drama.

I received a free copy of this audiobook from MacMillan Audio via #NetGalley
for a fair and honest review. All opinions are my own.

This book was gritty and dark and I LOVED it. After reading and loving Razorblade Tears, I knew I would be an S.A. Cosby fan for life. This man can craft a story! Please check all trigger/content warnings as this book is definitely not for younger readers or people who might have difficulty with adult content involving sexual situations, murder, violence, prostitution, dishonest members of the clergy.

Nathan Waymaker is a former Marine and sheriff's deputy who now works in his cousin's funeral home and he "handles the bodies," in every way you want to take that. Nathan has been asked to help the community solve the murder of a local minister and make sure the people responsible are brought to justice and the minister's death isn't just "swept under the rug."

With corruption everywhere Nate turns, he must handle and defeat wannabe gangsters, tough guys, and incredibly corrupt church leaders to get to the truth about the minister's death.

For me, this was an easy 5-star read. Top-notch narration by Adam Lazarre-White, who returns to narrate after Razorblade Tears and Blacktop Wasteland.

Thank you to NetGalley, Macmillan audio and Flatiron Books for this advanced listener copy for an honest review.

S.A. Cosby’s novels are always gritty, hard-hitting, and rough and this is no exception. This novel details a murder mystery attempting to be solved by Nathan, an ex-cop and marine who now works at his cousin’s mortuary. Nate deals with his personal trauma alongside those of the people in his town as he struggles to discover who killed the minister. S.A. Cosby leans into the violence needed to tell such a tale and does a great job doing so. I particularly loved the opening as read by the author and the detail put into character building throughout the novel. Thank you to NetGalley and Flatiron Books for the audiobook in exchange for an honest review.

There’s been a good amount of buzz about S.A. Cosby’s books so when it was rereleased on NetGalley, I signed up to read My Darkest Prayer. This is a great Southern crime noir and the narrator is perfect. I also enjoyed the introduction by the author.

Main character Nate works at a funeral home in small-town, Virginia just as the author has. He’s an ex-deputy and former Marine whose parents were killed by a drunk driver. Some church ladies ask him to investigate the recent death of a preacher. There are great subplots and action. Not my typical read but I enjoyed this thoroughly.

My Darkest Prayer is a wonderful crime novel. Yes, there is some violence, but the grittiness and humor blend together in a beautiful way. Can't wait to read more from Cosby.

This audiobook starts with an introduction by Cosby himself, reflecting on this novel debut. As expected, White’s narration is excellent with the pace matching the ebb and flow of the story. The action and several scenes of violence were read with intensity. The snark of Waymaker’s first-person storytelling is well-placed and needed as listeners/readers are exposed to some horrific histories and present day acts of the worst kind. Is Waymaker a hero or antihero? Does he want to control his rage?

Thanks to MacMillan Audio and NetGalley for the ALC. My reviews and ratings are my own.



cw/tw: violence of many forms on page; gun violence; SA of a minor recalled by victim; very graphic sexual content between consenting adults; racial slurs; police brutality and injustice; blackmail; bullying; murder of family members

The Darkest Prayer by SA Cosby did not disappoint! Well within the same thrill of his other two Blacktop Wasteland and Razorblade Tears, this story is told with grit, loyalty, violence and redemption! Without a doubt another five star read. So grateful to Flatiron for dusting off this originally published in 2019 version for another g0-round!

S. A. Cosby is a master storyteller. I really appreciate authors who are not wasteful with words, who can be descriptive without having the reader feeling that the book is full of filler/fluff so the author can hit a word count. Cosby’s stories are concise and reel you in from the beginning. Some of his one-liners in his books really crack me up.

Year after year he continues to create interesting characters with grit & substance, characters you root for, despite sometimes being a bit morally gray. He’s absolutely an auto-buy author for me. I’d love to meet him one day. If you haven’t read his work…you’re missing out. Blacktop Wasteland was great but I think Razorblade Tears remains my absolute fav of his work so far.

The audio narrator was fantastic as well.

This book, as with his other books…is gross at times but the grossness is necessary to convey the story. For instance, he describes brain matter and blood falling from the ceiling making a rain-like noise. Gross right?

This is a book full of porn stars, church ladies, cops, gangsters and all sorts of unsavory characters. The MC, Nathan is the kind of guy you’d want on your side…not someone you’d want to cross.

There was this one scene where I was grossed out and laughing at the same time when Nathan had to retrieve a body in a compromising position from the nursing home early on in the book.

I definitely recommend this one and think all of his books should be made into movies.

4.5 stars! This is my first my SA Cosby but def not my last. This was deliciously good. The twist at the end whewww I would have never guessed. All I’m going to say is a book about church folk, a dead pastor, and gang members is a recipe for a wild ride. Love this!

My Darkest Prayer is SA Crosby’s debut novel, but is just now being released after his mega hits Razorblade Tears and Blacktop Wasteland. Why this book is just now making its way into the world, I have no idea. This should have been the book that snagged publishers and created the following. It’s the book that has sealed the deal on me becoming a forever follower and fan of his work.
SA Crosby has an intense talent of creating deeply troubled and soulful characters that immediately hold onto your heart. I’m this book, Nathan Waymaker is everything you need in a protagonist that is always on the wrong side of the law and can charm the pants of any female he meets. You can’t help but fall in love with his sarcasm and dry humor and his loyalties. All of SA Crosby’s main characters have a little of Nathan in them, but Nathan is the real deal.
Is SA Crosby to literature what Michelangelo was to paintings? I think so. He writes so beautifully, making every word a brush stroke for his masterpiece. Thrilling and engaging are not the right words for his books, they are more then that. They are raw and real, and should be read!
I had the pleasure of reading this book in print and on audio. Though both are outstanding, the audiobook stands out. The narrator, Adam Lazzare- White, has a gravely baritone voice like Vin Diesel, but is smooth like Idris Elba’s. If I had a visual of Nathan Waymaker, he would have been Idris. But that voice.. omg he fit the character. I actually think SA Crosby should narrate his own books, since his voice is just as appealing. But I’ll settle for this one. He makes the story exciting, sexy and thrilling.
Read this book now! Listen to this book! You won’t be sorry. SA Crosby never disappoints.

Nathan Waymaker is living as a private investigator after leaving the police force. When he’s asked to look into the death of a beloved local reverend, he doesn’t know what he’s getting into.

My first Cosby book and I can see why people like him! This was a gritty read, full of dark and uncomfortable moments that had me squirming. The writing didn’t shy away from any detail and I loved the dark underworld that Waymaker was navigating.

My Darkest Prayer is another gem from SA Cosby, full of complex and flawed characters and a mystery that’s about the journey as much as the resolution.

I love how SA Cosby uses his characters to reflect the issues in our society as well as its potential, and that doing the right thing is never about perfection or moral absolutes. The setting also comes to life with richness.

Nathan works for a funeral home in south eastern Virginia. When a local reverend dies by suicide, Nathan is highly suspicious and even more leery that no one else seems interested at all. As he dives into the reverend’s former life, Nathan finds himself an unlikely ally in an adult folk star and surrounded by other interesting individuals.

The mystery is enjoyable and tenuous, with a satisfying conclusion but I adore SA Cosby for characters he brings to life that feel so real, so firmly entrenched in the ugliness of our world. I highly recommend this for fans of his other works or anyone who enjoys Southern characters and small town drama.