Cover Image: My Darkest Prayer

My Darkest Prayer

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Member Reviews

My Darkest Prayer by S. A. Cosby is a phenomenal republished book!
I've been wanting to buy this ebook for some time and now I must definitely am after listening to the audio book.
I LOVED Razorblade Tears, immediately after finishing that one I jumped on my Kindle Store to buy Blacktop Wasteland (which I also loved). I'm saying all that to say... Cosby is a stellar writer!

My Darkest Prayer is a great crime noir story.
Adam Lazarre-White did such a fantastic job with the narration.
His voice pulled me into the story immediately.
The story was intriguing, remarkable and straight up addicting!
Nathan Waymaker's character drove me to complete uselessness.
I did absolutely nothing while listening to his story.
A small Southern town mystery, with corruption and deep dark secrets this phenomenal read was definitely unputdownable! And I devoured every second of it.

I can't wait to see what this remarkable author blesses us with next!
If you haven't read the audio or even the book I'd highly recommend reading this entertaining story!

"I received a complimentary copy of this book. Opinions expressed in this review are completely my own."

Thank you to NetGalley and Macmillan Audio for my ARC in exchange for my honest review.
*Publisher I'm truly sorry I missed the Pub Day Review*

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S.A. Cosby is quickly becoming an auto-buy author for me! There’s something about their writing that really speaks to me! Thanks to NetGalley, I was able to enjoy the audio version and it was absolutely fantastic! The narrator brought out the depth in the main character and fit the mood of the book perfectly. I couldn’t have asked for any better.

I was initially unsure about this book, judging it by its cover and title, but given the author I was willing to try it out. I’m very glad I did! I was afraid this was going to be a preachy-type book and as an unreligious person I prefer to avoid that in my books, but I’m happy to report it most definitely is not preachy.

It follows a man as he uncovers the dark secrets around town - he’s a former marine and police officer now working at a funeral home for his cousin. He finds himself in some trouble and the local preacher seems to be at the center of it. He finds himself investigating knowing that the local police force won’t be much help - and he winds up in some sticky situations. It’s action packed and there’s plenty of drama. Definitely worth the read (or listen) in my opinion.

My one complaint is the length. There were some parts that’s definitely felt so slow I was sure I accidentally switched books but then it would pick right back up again. Still worth it though. Recommended - absolutely. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

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Razorblade Tears is a top of the year for me and I jumped at the chance to listen to this re-release. Cosby is such a gifted writer and I loved his introduction in this reissued version as he discussed how his novel came to be. His characters are always so human - flawed but caring, honest and true to themselves. I truly need a sequel with Skunk. Adam Lazarre-White does a fabulous job narrating and really is able to bring the characters to life. Onto Blacktop Wasteland next!

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Strong warning on this one....explicit sex scenes, language, gory murder scenes, and profanity

I have read three of S.A. Cosby's books and although super gritty and filled with profanity, enjoyed them all. He is a master storyteller one who could weave a tale so flawlessly.

In this telling we have the death of a well-liked minister who some of his parishioners thinks was murdered. She hires Nathan Waymaker, a former police person, to investigate the supposed murder. Nathan is no novice in understanding people's motives, plus his own background has been somewhat murky. A former marine, Nathan is now is a mortician's assistant who toils at a local funeral parlor.

The former minister, has a daughter, a porn star who becomes involved with Nathan. She hated her father, but does provide a sex filled environment for Nathan to luxuriate in. These scenes are super steamy and the author is quite explicit in his descriptions. However, as Nathan begins his investigation, he gets deeper and deeper into a tale of bad guys, crime lords, and of course the minister. Nate is a great reader of people, and puts himself in the midst of what is turning out to be a sex ring which might have involved the police department. Nate holds nothing back and his speech is littered with many X-rated words and his many escapes. However, he is astute and is a man with a mission that he is determined to see through to its end.

This book is super gritty and the first by this author, where his writing ability and his way with words and atmosphere is profoundly seen. He is also quite witty and brings a smile to the reader's face many times. It is definitely not for everyone as it might offend some's sensibilities. It was addictive as Cosby takes us down a road filled with trash, deceptions, sex. and death. Nathan is certainly a character one would want firmly on your side with some very "down to earth" friends.

"Some people need to go to hell, and we need to get them there."

Thank you to S.A. Cosby, Adam Lazarre-White who did a fantastic time with the narration, and Macmillan Audio for a copy of this harrowing story.

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A great audio book you can’t stop listening to. SA Crosby has become one of my favorites either by listening or reading. Highly recommend, A dark thrilling and satisfying read.

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S.A. Cosby has such an incredible way with words, and his re-released debut MY DARKEST PRAYER is not lacking. Adam Lazarre-White expertly navigates the narration of this complex story.

I did have a harder time with some of the, shall we say "grittier" aspects of this story.

Nathan is a former marine, ex-cop who is working at his cousins funeral home. He is known as a guy who can get things done if need be. When a local minister is found dead, a group of ladies from his congregation ask Nathan to make sure the death is not covered up. As it does, the can of worms is opened and Nathan can't turn away from what he finds, whether he wants to or not.

The story was dark and gritty, hilarious and lyrical. It is the weirdest combination of writing that somehow works. I read BLACKTOP WASTELAND first and absolutely loved it, RAZORBLADE TEARS was also fantastic. This story was really good as well, I just found the sexual aspects to be dark and hard to listen to. The incredible writing kept me hooked or I may have put this aside. That is totally me, though, and possibly I was just not as prepared for that. I would definitely recommend this if you enjoy Cosby's style of vicious writing, but I would go in prepared.

Thank you @netgalley and @macmillan.audio for the opportunity to listen to this ALC. This "new" title is available today!

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Happy Pub Day to someone who is becoming one of my favorite authors.

I can now say I have read all of SA Cosby's book after listening to My Darkest Prayer.

You can hear what will become his signature style is this crime noir. He always has that one regular guy that is suddenly forced, due to circumstances of his own design, to become the "badass" that takes down the villains in the most violent of ways.

This book is gritty and dark and filled with all kinds of nefarious characters that coexist uncomfortably in a small southern town. The perfect setting for all sorts of misadventures to occur. Nathan Waymaker is now in the center of one of the town's deadliest mysteries - who killed the town’s shady preacher?

When Nathan embarks to find out for two of the churches congregants, it leads him on an adventure filled with sex, lies, and plenty of blood. Nathan has to find a way to solve the mystery without getting himself killed.

I love the way SA Cosby writes side characters, they are just as compelling as his main characters and often deliver some of the best dialogue. His dialogue always feels real and reflects the small town in the south setting that the characters inhabit.

My Darkest Prayer also gave me a bit of Devil In A Blue Dress by Walter Mosley vibes. Similar characters, (Easy Rawlins and Nathan are
both veterans, Mouse is Easy's deadly sidekick, Skunk is Nathan's) and a deadly mystery being covered up by white racists.

My one complaint about SA Cosby's writing is his portrayal of women in his books. They are all subjected to the "male gaze" and never really have a significant role. That was the case in this book as well. Women were constantly sexualized and objectified and had very little utility. I hope as Cosby grows as a writer he will learn to give voice and agency to the female characters in his books.

Overall, this was a really entertaining audiobook and even more impressive that it was a first novel. The narration was excellent throughout and made this book all the more exciting to listen to. I highly recommend this audiobook for anyone who loves a good crime noir.

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Wow! This was my first book by S.A. Cosby and just wow. I am definitely going to be looking up the rest of his books. This was a dark and gritty story of some of the worst "Christians" I've read in a long time. Justice is not always legal and the legal system is definitely not always or even often just. Throw in some outright racist bullshit and some murder and you've got a kick-ass book!
#NetGalley

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4.5 rounded to 5

Want a good story that’s authentic, vulnerable, deep, well-written, with great pacing? Look no further!

I loved Razorblade Tears and really enjoyed Blacktop Wasteland. I have a new favorite by S.A. Cosby.

Nathan is a bada$$. A former marine who resigned as a sheriff’s deputy, he begins a quest to find what happened to a recently deceased pastor. What follows is a high stakes look into small town secrets and a collection of characters only Cosby could pull together. Somehow he’s able to weave nuance with blunt force in a way nobody else I’ve read can.

Thank you to Netgalley and Macmillan Audio for the ARC in exchange for my honest review.

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𝕄𝕪 𝔻𝕒𝕣𝕜𝕖𝕤𝕥 ℙ𝕣𝕒𝕪𝕖𝕣 ℝ𝕖𝕧𝕚𝕖𝕨 ✝️

𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫: S.A. Cosby @leoking8473
𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: Contemporary Fiction & Crime
𝐑𝐞-𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐏𝐮𝐛 𝐃𝐚𝐲: Today

𝑻𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉𝒕𝒔:
I read Razerblade Tears last year and fell in love with Crosby’s writing ✍️ - so when I saw a re-release of his first Novel My Darkest Prayer 🙏 I knew I needed to read it!

It is dark, disturbing and beautiful.

I love Cosby’s writing and how vivid his descriptions are. He writes poetically while still being candid about his experiences.

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⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

My Darkest Prayer by S.A. Cosby (reprint out TODAY)

If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a million times—S.A. Cosby is one of my favorite authors and can do no wrong. Absolutely none.

When I saw that My Darkest Prayer, one of his earlier books, was being reprinted and released, I knew I had to read it ASAP. And it did not disappoint (was there any doubt?)!

Cosby has such an incredible gift for words—every single word used in his books is intentional. And I love it. They pack such a metaphorical punch, and he knows when to break up the tension with a quick little sarcastic dig or metaphor. It’s perfect. And I don’t know if there’s another author who can write flawed yet redeemable characters like Cosby. They are all trying to be “good”, but inevitably get thrown into terrible situations. Yet, I find myself constantly rooting for them—like I did with Nathan Waymaker in My Darkest Prayer 👏🏻

I listed to this on audio, and the narration was beautiful and fit the characters so well. Highly recommend.

Thank you @netgalley, @macmillanaudio, and @leoking8473 for the #gifted audiobook!

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Nathan Waymaker is a man of many skills. The former sheriff’s deputy and Marine has earned a reputation in his hometown as someone who can provide unconventional help in difficult situations. His easy payday for investigating the death of a beloved preacher turns into chaos as many in this small town don’t want their corruption brought to light.

I love S.A. Cosby’s storytelling! His books are always a wild ride with insightful messages. While My Darkest Prayer is Cosby’s debut, his ability to skillfully craft gritty, graphic stories laced with humor and full of memorable, morally gray characters is fully evident. A few minor signs of this being a debut can be found, such as unnecessarily big words and less artful descriptions of women. Still, this book is the same overall caliber as Cosby’s other books.

Nathan’s ride-or-die friend, Skunk, stole the show for me. He’s a man of few words but can always be counted on. I would love a book with Skunk as the main character.

The combination of Cosby’s stories and the narration of Adam Lazarre-White is the perfect match! Lazarre-White shines as he brings these characters to life; each is unique and distinct. I was fully immersed in this small rural Virginia town and Nathan’s refusal to walk away from an impossible situation despite the increasing danger.

I read and loved both Blacktop Wasteland and Razorblade Tears last year. After listening to this debut, I appreciate how Cosby’s writing has evolved. I can’t wait to see what S.A. Cosby does next. His 2023 new release, All the Sinners Bleed, is on my most anticipated list.

Thank you to Macmillan Audio and NetGalley for a copy of this audiobook. All opinions in this voluntary review are my own.

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Thanks to NetGalley & MacMillan Audio for providing an audio ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Of course, I've heard of S.A. Cosby and have been wanting to read his stuff. What better entrée into his world than his debut novel?

From reading other reviews, I gather that Cosby's second and third novels deliver the promise the reader sees in this debut novel, rereleased now after Cosby's success with Blacktop Wasteland. Nate, the protagonist of this hard-bitten story, is a biracial Marine and ex-deputy in Virginia. He left the force after crucial evidence was "lost" in the deliberate auto crash that killed his parents, perpetrated by the town's richest man/bank manager's son. After a rough few years, Nate is now working at his cousin's funeral home, and is asked by a couple of church ladies to look into the death of their pastor, a former criminal found shot dead in his house.

Nate finds himself thrust into the middle of a multilayered case, as the pastor was possibly laundering money "tithed" to the church by a local wannabe gangster. That gangster's associates come for Nate, as do another pastor's assistants after Nate tracks down some important clues after going to the pastor's house at the behest of his daughter, with whom Nate becomes intimately involved. With help from some friends, Nate is able to fight his way out of sticky situations and get to the bottom of the situation (and then extract himself from it without the crooked police force realizing his involvement).

PROS: Very well-written story, fast paced. It was a quick listen and I was engaged the whole time. The "filler" stuff that I usually filter out when I listen to an audiobook actually kept my attention. Nate is a likeable character.

CONS: Nate is likeable, but not entirely believable (more than once, he defeats a group of men in a fistfight. Who is he, Jet Li?). The main female protagonist is literally a porn star; most other females exist in reference to Nate's having slept with them (Church ladies aside, although one of those later propositions him).

Adam Lazarre-White is more than capable for this voice acting. He gets the tone just right, although I would've liked more distinction between male characters.

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Typically, books with a lot of violence aren't my jam, but there is something special about S.A. Cosby's writing style. I loved Razorblade Tears and Blacktop Wasteland so I was excited to read his first novel, My Darkest Prayer.

This story follows Nathan, a retired Marine and ex-deputy, while he is working at a funeral home. When he is asked by some older women to look into the death of a local preacher, everything goes sideways. This story kept getting more intense but also had an element of mystery. All the characters were introduced well and felt like real people. Cosby's words are purposefully chosen and you can tell he has a gift for character development and storytelling.

This book, wasn't quite as good as his other two in my opinion but very much still worth the read. There is a decent section of the book that feels like it is dragging. I understand Cosby was laying the foundation for action but I think it could have been cleaned up a bit more.

The narration for this book is perfect. Adam Lazarre-White also narrated Cosby's other books and he takes each story up a level.

Thank you to Macmillan Audio, S.A. Crosby, and NetGalley for my advanced audio review copy.

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I am about the last person on earth not to have read Razorblade Tears, and this is a grievous error I will soon be rectifying, because my God, SA Cosby can write. This is the kind of book you want to put down to write down all the beautiful quotes, a book you just want to savor forever. The audiobook narration by Adam Lazarre-White matches this beauty word for word. The narrator’s voice is so gorgeous and his acting so compelling that I had to take a little Google journey to find out exactly who had this major gift.

But let’s get back to the main attraction - this incredible noir writer SA Crosby. Now I know I’m late to the party, but I am thrilled to discover him. His metaphors would make Raymond Chandler proud. His dialogue is crackling. His characters are humorous, intense, and will get you immediately invested. This book goes into the world of undertakers, which is not a universe I thought I was interested in, but Cosby had me riveted by the start. This authors voice is so lyrical and funny and brutal. You feel every punch in every fight, every description is that perfect. I can’t compare this to his better-known works but I can tell you this audiobook is truly a gift, both in writing and narration, and several cuts above anything else I have read recently. Every sentence is so beautifully crafted. I can’t wait to read more from Cosby and I sure hope this is narrator he uses again, because it is a perfect fit.

Many thanks to Macmillan Audio and the author for one of the best books of the year.

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I loved Blacktop Wasteland and then Razorblade Tears topped that one so I was looking forward to reading this book. I am absolutely stunned that My Darkest Prayer was the book that came before either as it is absolutely phenomenal. The book follows Nathan Waymaker through his life working at his cousin's funeral home in a small town in Virginia where he is asked to look into a suspicious death by two church ladies who know that Nate used to be a deputy and may take events into his own hands to help people at times. The story is at turns funny, and violent, and you most definitely don't want to start listening in the car when your kids are with you as it is certainly for adult audiences only. Cosby's writing is sublime and his talent for moody atmosphere is first rate, leading you to get lost in small town rural Virginia. Adam Lazarre-White was an amazing narrator, drawing you into the laid back rhythm of the small town while also ramping up the action parts with Nate and Skunk. I cannot recommend this book enough and heartily thank Macmillan Audio, Flatiron Books, NetGalley, and S.A Cosby for the early listen to this book for my honest opinion.

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Featuring ~ single 1st person POV, suicide references, death, crime, dark, violence, graphic, small town, some steamage

Nathan is an ex-cop and retired military currently working in a funeral home, and his violent abilities definitely show in this one. It is pretty graphic and action packed which kept me engaged. There were some intense moments and the pace remained steadily fast.

This is my first experience with this author and I'd give him a whirl again.

Narrated by Adam Lazarre-White for 9 hours and 23 minutes, easy to follow at 2-2.5x. He did a fine job. I definitely got a southern vibe from him.

*Thanks to Macmillan Audio, the author and NetGalley for my audio copy. I am voluntarily leaving my honest review*

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I was happy to hear Cosby's debut novel was getting a second breath of life by being republished. I'm a huge fan of Razorblade Tears and looked forward to checking out his earliest novel.

The book follows Nathan, a former Marine, sheriff's deputy, and current funeral home employee. He's no stranger to violence, and that streak continues when parishioners ask him to look into the death of the local minister. What should have been an easy cash grab, Nathan finds himself in a world of crime lords, a porn star, and crooked cops.

Similar to Razorblade Tears, My Darkest Prayer is filled with action. It would be a fantastic, gritty movie that also has moments of humor sprinkled in. Nathan was a total badass of a character, and I enjoyed following him on such an explosive adventure.

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BLACKTOP WASTELAND and RAZORBLADE TEARS made me a huge fan of both S.A. Cosby and Adam Lazarre-White. When I saw that Cosby's debut novel was available on audio from Macmillan, via NetGalley, I jumped all over it and here we are. S.A. Cosby is the REAL DEAL!

MY DARKEST PRAYER is the story of Nathan Waymaker. Nate works at a funeral home in his small Virginia town. Nate is a retired Marine, (because once a Marine, always a Marine), and an ex-deputy, whose parents were killed by a drunk driver that got off scot-free. Nate is asked by the family to look into the recent death of a local preacher and before you know it, (and before Nate knows it), he's sucked into a mystery turned murderous. Featuring a wide variety of memorable characters, (Skunk!), acts of violence, and a few smoking hot sex scenes, this mystery is a tough nut to crack. Will Nate figure out who killed the preacher? Will Nate survive his investigation? You'll have to read this to find out!

Once again, Cosby has drawn me in to a tale full of mesmerizing characters that feel real. Gritty crime novels have never felt so real as Cosby makes them feel. They are full of casual racism, nasty villains, and protagonists that aren't perfect. There are lots of grey areas and I think that's what I like the best...nothing is as easy as black and white, certainly not real people.

Adam Lazarre-White has the perfect voice for Cosby novels. At times sexy, at times growly, at times both at once, and ALL the time: flat out awesome. I would pay to have him read my grocery list just so I can listen to him again.

Put these two men together and you have one compulsive read that I tore through in a matter of a few work days.

If you are already a fan of Cosby, I expect you will enjoy this, his debut novel. If you are new to Cosby, then prepare yourself, because if this effort is your first, you should know that the next two novels are even better than this one. Sometimes it's fun to see how an author grows and polishes his skills, and in this case- that is true. When a debut is as good as this one, you just KNOW that the author's later books are going to be better and better. Readers, I'm here to tell you they ARE.

Treat yourself by going back to when Cosby first started, so you can see for yourself that very little improvement was needed, right from the get-go. I, for one, look forward to what Cosby does next!

Highly recommended! Audio available December 6th, 2022!

*Thank you to NetGalley and Macmillan Audio for the free audio download in exchange for my honest feedback. This is it!*

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I was happy to receive an advanced listening copy when the author’s debut novel, My Darkest Prayer, was being republished as I loved his other two books. Adam Lazarre-White is the narrator and he always does a fantastic job, and the same is true with this one. I really enjoyed the story, which I fully expected to, it is entertaining and I loved the tie in to both church and funeral home. I will note the descriptions of the women were a little distracting for me but that was really my only comment with this one. Cosby is a phenomenal writer, I love his style and cannot wait to see what he does next.

Thank you to NetGalley and Macmillan Audio for the ALC to review.

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