This is a rerelease of S.A. Cosby’s (author of Blacktop Wasteland and Razorblade Tears) first novel.

If you are a mega fan, you will probably want to read this. And if you are a mega fan of the audio versions read by Adam Lazarre-White, he is back with another masterful performance.
However, if you are not a mega fan or have not read Cosby’s other books, you can skip this one pretty safely. Cosby’s beautifully clever southernisms abound in My Darkest Prayer, but almost to the point of distraction. His characters are gritty and morally gray, but not as fully developed as Cosby’s later works.
In short, you can clearly see S.A. Cosby’s voice emerging here, and while it’s very good, it’s not quite up to the powerhouse that his later works are.
Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for my review copy!

I like this author's ability to create a good story. He can definitely do that. I just wish he wouldn't try so hard to impress the reader with his use of constant metaphors and similes and high school vocabulary words. The narrator does a great job. Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for the advanced copy in exchange for an honest review.

4 stars

Nathan, the m.c., is the kind of guy you want on your side. He can solve problems, interact with creepy folks, and bring the muscle and the brain to the party. He will also mess you up if you have wronged him. In other words, he's the ideal antihero for exactly this genre.

This is my second Cosby read (I loved _Razorblade Tears_), and it has further solidified my engagement with this author. The characters operate in grey areas but often for reasons that still make them sympathetic, and it's easy for readers to wonder how they'd react...and who is really in the right. Every aspect of this book is gritty, but I think even those who are a little shy about this vibe will find the potentially seedier elements tastefully managed.

I came into this read (listen, actually, since I was fortunate to receive the audio version) a fan of this author and am leaving an even more devoted promoter of Cosby's efforts. Already, I'm looking forward to what comes out next!

My Darkest Prayer by S.A. Cosby

Mr. Cosby always pulls me in with his flawed characters just trying to live life but life isn't easy for them. In this one Nathan who is an ex military guy as well as ex sheriff as well. He is just trying to move on with life when a friend ask him to look into the murder of the local pastor of the church who ends up dead. Nathan agrees hesitantly to do so because he doesn't have a good relationship with the sheriff department.

The good pastor isn't living the life of the lord like he should be that ends up getting him killed. The pastor is not a likable character at all. Nathan continues to look into the case which leads to some dark places and he calls in a friend that helps him cover his back.

I like the way that S.A. Cosby brings these black men to life who just want to live life but also seems to find themselves in hot messes that puts them in dangerous situations. This was Mr. Cosby debut novel and I can see why I love his books so much.

in the end with all the crazy things happening Nathan pushes forward to get to the bottom of what happened to the pastor and in that he puts his own life at risk. The people involved are not good people they are as dangerous as bag of poisonous snakes.

Narrated by Adam Lazarre-White which he did such a good job bringing the book to full life. This was a five star read for me. There is something to Mr. Cosby writing magic that keeps me turning the pages and I become invested in these flaw characters.

Thank you to Netgalley and Macmillan audio for a free audio copy of My Darkest Prayer for an honest review. All opinions and thoughts in this review are my own.

“Somebody has to handle the bodies.”

Wow. My Darkest Prayer surpassed all my expectations. It’s gritty, it’s raw, and Adam Lazarre-White is the perfect narrator. He takes S.A. Crosby’s already perfect prose and adds that extra spin, making this one perfect for audio. There are so many lines that I found myself pausing the audio to write down, just because they spoke to me.

“I don’t have to believe in God to believe in hell.”

There’s something so honest and true about My Darkest Prayer and S.A, Crosby’s writing in general. All the stars!

Nathan Waymaker is a former marine, a former sheriff's deputy and a current mortuary assistant, “I handle the bodies.” A man of bulk, strength and bravery, Nathan seems to end up in situations where he needs to handle the bodies of the living too.

Nathan is asked by two church ladies to look into the murder of their pastor. This “favor” leads to a drug kingpin and a porn star, violence, lies, secrets, blackmail and murder. The more Nathan digs, the more people die.

A compulsive and sexy read, with believable characters, witty Elmore-Leanard-type dialogue and an absorbing driving storyline. Cosby has created a fantastic reluctant hero in Waymaker. He is flawed yet just, considerate yet vengeful. I would definitely follow Waymaker into more adventures. He is memorable and heartbreaking.

Narrated by Adam Lazarre-White @realadamlw. What a voice on this man! He beautifully expresses Nathan’s seething anger and allows you to feel Nathan’s wit and suppressed smiles.

I think reading this after Razorblade Tears, an all time favorite for me, definitely draws attention to the aspects of this novel that feel "debut" but I can't say that's a bad thing. It certainly felt like a first novel compared to his newer works, but in a way that just shows how talented he is overall. I think anyone who enjoys his previous work should read My Darkest Prayer and will absolutely enjoy it.

Thank you Macmillan audio for the gift that is another SA Crosby book. My Darkest Prayer continues to reveal Crosby as an immense artist, capable of making dark and violent events and characters engaging through mesmerizing writing and deft touches of humor. Adam Lazarre-White's narration is strong, he captures the mood, pacing, and the narration enhances the writing and plot. I know that fans of Crosby, and those trying his books out for the first time, will find themselves easily drawn into My Darkest Prayer; it was the kind of audiobook that made me ok with some traffic and my long commute.

I don't know how Cosby manages to write dark topics and violence so eloquently and beautifully, but man, this man is an artist.

I flew through My Darkest Prayer, like I could NOT stop listening. Cosby has a way of developing characters you feel like you get to know and want to root for. The pace of this book is perfection. Once things get going, you better hold on tight and get ready for a wild ride. Yes, it's a violent book. And yes, it's pretty graphic. Sometimes I'm reminded of some of Tarantino's movies. However, you are so incredibly gripped by the writing and engaged in the story, it's impossible to look away. Cosby is definitely becoming a favorite author.

A huge thanks to NetGalley and MacMillian Audio for my advanced audio version in exchange for an honest review.

This is my 3rd #AudionBooking Experience from this author and again he did not disappoint! Not too many narrators can pull off all characters and genders so flawlessly and IMO Adam Lazarre-White does it quite well. The intro read by the author gave a bit more insight into the mind of a writer who is way underpraised! He does not even give himself the credit he is due as it relates to his brilliant storytelling. I kinda wish he give up his full time gig and get to some more writing! I highly recommend adding all his titles to your TBR list. A little smut, some drama, a generous amount of LMAO LOL scenes, violence and some loving family scenes from kinfolk and a ride or die sociopathic friend... It all totally enveloped me as I went on this wild ride.
#MyDarkestPrayer #NetGalley #Virginia #PoliceBrutality #ReligiousHypocracy #MARINES #MentalHealth #PTSD #Thriller #SUSPENCE #MUSTREAD # #MacmillanAudio #FlatironBooks #GoodReads #ARC

“I had just called in a sociopath to help me deal with a crime boss and his psycho henchman. That was a foolproof plan. Nothing could possibly go wrong with that.”- Nathan
This sums up MY DARKEST PRAYER perfectly. Trouble that makes you draw in a deep breath and a dash of humor to have it burst back out. You just know it is going to be a violent, white-knuckle, elbow to the face, crawl to the finish line book, with protagonists that you just hope are out there in real life because you know the antagonists are.
This is intelligent crime noir hidden behind an ox of a man who is only trying to do what he thinks is best. Nathan is someone you want as a friend, someone you would do anything for because you know it was reciprocated.
I really can not express how much I enjoy S.A. Cosby’s writing. If you haven’t read his work then you need to fix that now. His style is smooth and instantly immersive. My Darkest Prayer was his first crime novel and plays out as a black and white movie in my head with occasional scratches on the film while your shoes are sticking to the spilled soda on the floor. You expect to see Bogart but it is Fishburne’s cool presence that dominates the show.
Laurence Fishburne and Nathan have a similar philosophy “A succinct philosophy that can be summed up in four words. Talk shit. Spit blood.”

My Darkest Prayer is the republished first novel by the brilliant S.A. Cosby. He dazzled me with Blacktop Wasteland and Razorblade Tears and when I saw that this book was coming out, I was extremely excited. I love his writing and vivid descriptions. I said it before, he has the heart of a poet. He writes beautiful, insightful and often violent passages that leave me in awe. I had high expectations for this book, and he did not let me down!

“The truth is no one can be fully protected. Safety is an illusion. There is no safety. Just downtime between tragedies.”

Nathan Waymaker is a southern man who has pretty much seen it all and done it all. He is a former marine, sheriff's deputy and works in his cousin's funeral home. When a local minister is found dead, Nathan is asked to make sure his death does not get forgotten. What sounds like a cut and dry feat, turns into so much more. Nathan soon learns that he is up against crime lords, low life criminals, crooked cops, corruption, and a not so honorable preacher.

Things get interesting fast! Cosby does not hold back in detailing violence. Nathan needs to reach down deep and count on all the skills he to go up against small town corruption. Go up against them he does!

As I mentioned, this book is full of violence but also has glimpses of humor. I was fully invested in the plot and thought the narrator of the audiobook did a fantastic job. I felt like a fly on the wall watching everything unfold. As with his previous books, Cosby knows how to draw readers in while having his characters fight their way out of tough, often impossible situations.

Keep in mind that this was his first novel and has been republished. His writing has only gotten better with each book he writes. Cosby is from the south and sets his books/characters from there as well. He writes about communities, friendships, family, crime, vengeance and violent acts. He successfully intertwines violence with humor. He creates characters readers come to care about and root for. What a ride this was!

This book is gritty, dark, violent and hard to put down. I love his writing, his descriptions and characters. I look forward to reading more of his books in the future! If you have not read one of his books before, what are you waiting for? This is a great place to start! I find myself recommending his books to people all the time.


Thank you to Macmillan Audio and NetGalley who provided me with a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. All the thoughts and opinions are my own.

Nathan Waymaker is an ex-Marine, ex-cop and is now working and living at the local funeral home where he does the heavy lifting of the bodies. When a popular local preacher is found dead in his home, some of his congregation approach him to dig a little deeper into exactly what happened because being a man of God, suicide doesn’t fit. So the parishioners want him to use his special skills and relationships with law enforcement to see what he can dig up which turns out to be quite a lot, including the fact that the police and the local clergy aren’t all Snow White and pure as you would expect them to be.
There’s lots to like about the story and there things that I didn’t care for as much, but overall this is a good, solid yet dark look at small town corruption and who you can count on when the chips are down isn’t who you would always expect.
Thanks to Macmillan Audio and NetGalley for this audiobook arc in exchange for my review.

Compelling story with an amazing narrator. This book was great. I am glad this book is being rereleased as I had missed it. Cosby just continues to bring tough topics to light in a thrilling way.

In small town southern America, if you want to know where the bodies are buried you ask the Undertaker. Sometimes the Undertaker is the only one that knows. Nathan is a former Marine and Sheriff Deputy, but he is also the Assistant to the Undertaker. People in town know he is reliable - for many things. This is not an easy story to read. It is sometimes ugly and violent, but it is a good tale. Thanks to NetGalley for the early read.

This is one of my favorite authors. He writes in a way that makes me uncomfortable, but I enjoy it. To say that I was excited to get approved for this audio is an understatement. I was listening to another book when this approval came in and I put it down so I could listen to this one. And listen I did – all day. I have never finished an audio book so fast. I didn’t want to stop. The intro was done by S.A. Cosby himself, and then the narrator was just on point. I could go on and on about how this one just worked on so many levels – it was that good.

Nathan is a man who knows how to handle bodies. From taking care of them at his cousin’s funeral home to dealing with them at a local bar. He has built a reputation as a small-town Southern man who can help when other avenues don’t work. When a local minister is found dead, his parishioners ask Nathan to help make sure the death isn’t swept under the rug. Nathan had no idea what he was getting himself into, but now he’s worried he wont make it out alive.

I did find this book lacking in some of the grit of the previous S.A.Cosby books I’ve read, but it didn’t upset me or take away from the story. Nathan had a different than the characters in the other books. I found the experience wonderfully delightful and was reminded why this author is an auto-buy author for me.

This one is out Dec 6th, and you won’t be disappointed. If this is an author you’ve enjoyed in the past this one is a real show stopper. Huge thank you to @netgalley and the publisher, MacMillian Audio, @macmillian.audio, for my advanced audio version in exchange for this honest review.

S. A. Cosby is a brilliant, insightful author. Razorblade Tears impacted me so deeply. I understand this novel, his first, was massively important to him. I can see all of the beauty of it and why others will love it. It was not for me.

My Darkest Prayer is very Cosby- with smart-talking character, fast-paced action, and down to earth people in the most fantastical situations. He uses a pretty great rotating cast of characters while keeping the POV on his lead.

The plot is effective and well-paced. It's outside of the plot is where it gets more dicey. There's a general lack of polish (places where the dialogue is occasionally clunky and repetitive, more typos than you'd usually see in a traditionally published book) though that is less of an issue. Mostly it's our first-person narrator, Nate, and the hyper-masculine air he must give us at all times. BLACKTOP WASTELAND wasn't great with women but MY DARKEST PRAYER is actually bad about it. The most prominent female character is a porn star, whose body is described in great detail several times, as is every other woman's body that appears on the page. (Almost every woman Nate encounters is someone he has already slept with and he has to tell us so, of course.) Nate is so tough and so able to take on several guys in a fight (even if they're armed and he's not) that it strains credulity. Nate always feels like he has something to prove to us, the entire character never feels like a real person but more of an action movie persona. So it's hard to connect beyond the plot because there is not much there to connect to.

I think my struggles with the book are that unlike Razorblade tears, the characters don't feel as whole as I want them too.I feel distanced from them, so if I wasn't buying into the plot it was hard to care at all/

My Darkest Prayer by S.A. Cosby follows Nathan Waymaker, a former marine and sheriff's deputy, Nathan has built a reputation in his small Southern town as a man who can help when all other avenues have been exhausted. When a beloved local minister is found dead, his parishioners ask Nathan to make sure the death isn’t swept under the rug. What starts out as an easy payday soon descends into a maze of mayhem filled with wannabe gangsters, vicious crime lords, porn stars, crooked police officers, and a particularly treacherous preacher and his mysterious wife. Nathan must use all his varied skills and some of his wit to navigate the murky waters of small town corruption even as dark secrets of his own threaten to come to the surface.

While not as amazing as Razorblade Tears, My Darkest Prayer is an astounding debut from Cosby and a very enjoyable read. I am always impressed with how Cosby writes characters that feel over-the-top and yet so real. Cosby has a unique way of transporting the reader into the crazy scenarios his main characters find themselves in. I highly recommend this book!

I received this book free from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

Fast paced.

Nathan is an unapologetically violent man. He has been a Marine & Sheriff’s deputy. He’s now lives & works at his cousin’s funeral home & is the man you’d call when you need answers. A somewhat morally gray MC. The nicknames he uses in his phone for 2 close friends made me smile, definitely gray.

Nathan has a certain level of snark & uses his sense of humor regularly so it takes the edge off the violence.

When a beloved preacher is found dead some of his parishioners approach Nathan for help. He comes across all sorts of shadiness while investigating the untimely death of the porn star’s daddy. All sorts of naughtiness ensue.

What Nathan thought would be a quick, easy payday, ends up being a multi-life-threatening rollercoaster ride.

Thank you NetGalley & Macmillan Audio! I can’t wait for SA Cosby’s next book.

My Darkest Prayer by S.A. Cosby is a re-release of his first novel.

"Nathan Waymaker is a former marine and former deputy. He works with his cousin at the funeral home and knows how to get rid of a body. After a local reverend is found dead, an elder of his church asked Nathan to look into the pastor's death because the sheriff does not seem interested in finding out what really happened. Nathan starts asking questions and soon finds that there are many who want the real reason kept quiet."

This is gritty crime fiction from Cosby. There is lots of violence, murder and sex. Nathan Waymaker is a man with violence bubbling just below the surface. It doesn't take much of a threat to turn him loose. He feels like a precursor to Ike/Riot in Razorblade Tears. (There's even a Plymouth Fury reference) And there's a cast of big characters - like Skunk and Shade and Rev Short.

Sometimes you can tell this is a first novel (never use a big one when a small one will do) but Cosby's gift is putting the reader in the story. You can see and smell and hear everything going on in the story.

The narrator, Adam Lazarre-White, is phenomenal. His big voice is perfect for this story and these characters.

Fans of Cosby or edgy crime fiction will enjoy this book.