Tightwads and Spendthrifts: Navigating the Money Minefield in Real Relationships
By: Scott Rick

I loved reading this nonfiction book by behavioral scientist Scott Rick about couples and money management - such a unique read that I wished I had in the palms of my hand 30 years ago when I first started my relationship. As a nurse, science based understanding is what spoke to me in this book that was truly a wealth of knowledge- in all aspects of the word.

This would make a great gift for couples, a wedding gift, and to anyone who want to get a grasp of financial understanding.

Highly recommend.

Why is money so difficult between couples? Professor Scott Rick uses behavioral research and his own experiences to break down what financial issues cause friction in a relationship. Much of it comes down to our relationships with spending and with risk. Tightwads and spendthrifts seem to attract each other, and this leads to all sorts of relationship complications. Dr. Rick's compassionate approach for both sides helps address relationship conflicts and presents some potential solutions to this age-old issue.

Why does this book sum up my relationship 😂😭 was way too relatable and had me laughing out loud. A great read!

I'm not much of a non-fiction reader, but this book was made for me an my husband.

It offers a lot of helpful tips for working through financial disagreements. Being able to see and understand your partner's way of looking at money and finances is the first step to reaching compromise.

This is a great book to buddy read with your partner if you don't see money the same way.

I related to this book so much. I have been in this scenario in a relationship, and we definitely did not know how to coexist in harmony. This book would have worked wonders back then for us. It offers sound and insightful ways to better the money dynamics in your relationship. It packs a big punch in a quick read that is easy to understand and relatable. Rick writes in a way that anyone can relate to, even if not in a relationship. Finances can be very dry, so I appreciated his writing style. He did a good job sticking to real life ways to better the dynamics in one's relationship.

Thank you to NetGalley and St. Martin's Press for this ARC in exchange for my honest and voluntary review.

I've been reading a lot about relationships and money lately, and not really on purpose.

This was an interesting angle on finances, and while it made some good points, I felt like it mostly fell flat for me regarding navigating the actual issues. I found the questions in the appendix and the more interpersonal "growing together as humans" bits to be the most valuable parts, but those aren't really linked to the title or the point of the book, which made rating this one hard. It's probably more of a 2 star in finances and a 1 star in ability to hold my attention, but I'm rounding up because I didn't hate it.

[review on hold due to the boycott] Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the free advance copy.

"Tightwads and Spendthrifts" by Scott Rick is a revolutionary guide that delves into the often tricky terrain of financial dynamics in relationships, earning a well-deserved 4 stars from me.

Scott Rick, a behavioral scientist at the University of Michigan’s Ross School of Business, brings a fresh perspective to the table, acknowledging the common dilemma: What happens when one partner is a tightwad and the other a spendthrift? Rick recognizes that the financial aspects of a relationship can be a minefield if not approached with open communication.

This science-based guide is a treasure trove for anyone navigating the intricacies of managing money, both individually and in relationships. Rick draws on original research and a wide array of interdisciplinary insights to help readers understand their own financial psychology and how it influences their relationships.

The central question of whether tightwads and spendthrifts can coexist harmoniously is explored with depth and nuance. Rick emphasizes the importance of open dialogue and addressing financial issues head-on. The book doesn't just identify problems but offers practical solutions. The author goes beyond surface-level advice, encouraging couples to ask tough questions about whose opinions should take precedence in financial decisions.

The guide concludes with a game plan for financial decision-making that caters to both tightwads and spendthrifts, fostering a path towards a happy and balanced life together. Rick's insights are not only enlightening but also actionable, making this book an invaluable resource for anyone seeking financial harmony in their relationship.

If you've ever wondered about the dynamics of money in your relationship or are looking for practical solutions to financial conflicts, "Tightwads and Spendthrifts" is a must-read.

My husband and I have settled into quite a peaceful place about spending money over our 37 years of marriage. Any couple who finds themselves having some conflict about this should absolutely read this book. It talks about saving, spending, succumbing to advertising, joint vs separate bank accounts, financial honesty, gift-giving, and raising children. And Rick didn't say what I expected him to on every subject.
I loved the fact that Rick says that, as long as your differences aren't leading to constant stress and fighting, "mixed marriages" of a tightwad and a spendthrift can be among the happiest because you can mellow the worst in each other and come to satisfying compromises.
I would say that this is a book for people who recognize their own tendencies and know they aren't perfect. If at least one partner in a marriage is a tyrant about spending and believes that the only one who needs to change is the other partner, then this book won't help. Ditto a couple in which one partner needs counseling or therapy to change compulsive financial habits.

Thank you to the author Scott Rick, publishers St. Martin's Press, and NetGalley, for an advance digital copy of TIGHTWADS AND SPENDTHRIFTS. All views are mine.

Opening Quote: But since when is money just money? ...Money is not only a source of tension when partners need to discuss and jointly navigate important decisions. Loc.74

TIGHTWADS AND SPENDTHRIFTS is best described as a manual for people in relationships who don't get along financially. While the formula at the beginning, which readers can use to determine their financial style, is useful, the book quickly becomes less about how the reader might relate to the styles under discussion, and more about how the styles relate to each other. In the end, I found this an informative and useful read that provides great resources for the reader, especially as they relate to others in their lives on the subject of money!

Three (or more) things I loved:

1. I love the quotations throughout the book from Sammy Davis Jr. Representing the "spendthrift" mentality: I wasn’t thinking, “Someday I’ll have a pile of money.” I was thinking, “Someday we’ll make it and I’ll live like a human being. I’ll go where I want to go and I’ll be able to do anything I want to do!” loc.537

2. This book touches on some really interesting subtopics, like gift giving. Since couples could have different financial mindsets, navigating the "gift" love language can get tricky. Rick offers some possible resolutions to this conflict, and highlights some caveats, such as prefab "personalized" gifts pushed hard by merchandisers during gift holidays. A poorly chosen, hard-to-explain gift might create, or exacerbate, the impression that you have not mapped out your partner. That can be a miserable feeling. Loc.1962

Rating: 🐖🐖🐖🐖 household savings
Recommend? Yes!
Finished: Jan 5 '24
Format: Digital arc, Kindle, NetGalley
Read this book if you like:
📓 non-fiction
💰 financial self help
💸 class privilege and disparity
👩🏼‍🤝‍👨🏽 couple's self help
🎁 gift selecting and giving

It might not feel romantic but this book would make an excellent gift for a couple that you know…even if you, yourself, are part of said couple. It seems to me that it will be especially helpful to those in new(ish) relationships, say two people who are about to begin living together. Reading this could help to avoid trouble spots later in a relationship.

Clearly, people evolve their thinking about money in both conscious and unconscious ways. The author of this book, a behavioral scientist, unpacks how these attitudes influence a person using the categories of spendthrift and tightwad. Early in the book, there is a short quiz (I find quizzes tend to draw people in) that helps a person to acknowledge their overall perspective. 

Following this, are chapters that will, hopefully, lead to deeper understanding and connection between partners. I like that there is even attention paid to how a current generation may influence the one below.

Struggling with a partner about money? Not struggling but don’t want to have to? Either way, take a look at this helpful book.

Many thanks to NetGalley and St. Martin’s Press for this title. All opinions are my own.

An interesting guide to handling money issues in relationships.Whether your a tight wad or a spendthrift there is interesting information to negotiate your spending.#netgalley #st.martins

I am a Tightwad and my husband has spendthrift tendencies so I was excited to pick this book up. This book spends about the first half describing the terms and giving examples but doesn't really get to too much advice until the second half. I thought this was an interesting book but I feel like there is so much nuance to spending. I know with my husband's ADD, he gets little dopamine hits from spending but it didn't really discuss that at all. I also didn't read too much helpful advice for navigating our relationship with the differences. Luckily, we are able to deal with the differences OK but I was excited to get some helpful advice. I did read one thing that I might try to implement for us. But overall, this didn't meet my expectations on helpful, real world advice but it was a quick, easy and interesting read.

Thank you to the publisher and Netgalley for an advanced copy. Opinions are my own.

I like to start out each year diving into a finance book as a gift to my future self. This one caught my eye by promising to deliver tips and tricks and therapy-levek insight into helping partners align financial habits in marriage.
This delivered on the tips and tricks, but didn't hit my expected value for effort mark. There were some helpful pointers on what modern studies tell us about the pros and cons of operating joint accounts when you have a sincerely different relationship to spending than your partner does. It also also had insightful true anecdotes from study participants about the impact of being a spendthrift or tightwad had on their relationship.
But it didn't scratch the itch of really taking a holistic approach to how to navigate the tough conversations on money that are inevitable in every long term partnership, especially if partners grow up in different financial circumstances and with different financial values.
Also, the references and notes take up 44% of the book, so I admit to feeling kind of cheated when my kindle hit 56% and I was hit with the Conclusion chapter.

Thank you SMP for the arc - out tomorrow!

As the clock ticked and we flipped the calendar to a new year, many of us immediately wanted to become better versions of ourselves. Tightwads And Spendthrifts: Navigating The Money Minefield In Real Relationships by Scott Rick is one self-help book that would be extremely beneficial as we adjust to this new year and educate ourselves to make change.

Rick is a behavioral scientist, and as such, this book takes on a different perspective than other financial books I have read; as a result, this one worked better for me than any other ever has. The information presented was not based on wealth management statistics, but instead focused on the human side of money. This approach spun the narrative, and allows reading this self-help book to become extremely accessible to those in any tax bracket. Never once did it come across preachy or focus critically on money management.

I was shocked at just how much information this book provided and was fascinated by what it brought to the money and wealth discussion. Not only is it about money and how we spend it (or don't) but it also touches on our relationships with our partner and children (in relation to spending habits). This book truly narrowed in on our individual relationships with money, and how that relationship further affects our partnerships and children.

As I envisioned who should read this book, I thought about couples reading it together (it would be a great road trip audiobook), so I decided to put myself in that space as much as possible; I challenged myself and only listened to the audio format. (With that said, I am unbelievably happy to have the physical copy to return to, highlight and reach for time and time again.) The audiobook narrator (Stacey Carolan) was well spoken, easy to understand and provided the perfect tone for a non-fiction book; I'm also appreciative that a professional narrator was chosen to voice the book as an author is not always the best choice. My only issue with this audio format: I found it hard to fully comprehend the quiz at the beginning of the book but my solution worked and I simply slowed the narrator, and rewound as many times as needed until I grasped what was being asked.

This is simply one of the best self-help books I have read, especially in regards to this topic of money and how it is presented!

Thank you NetGalley, St. Martin's Press and Macmillan Audio for the complimentary copies to read and review.

Whether you're trying to manage finances as a single person or within the confines of a relationship or family, this book can be helpful. A little generic, but still good.

An informative and interesting exploration of different spending habits - those who have some trouble spending money ("tightwads") and those who have fewer qualms about spending freely ("spendthrifts").

While this is somewhat geared towards couples (and how different money management styles can cause conflict), I think anyone wanting to better understand their spending habits or motivations behind those habits can take away something useful from this.

Thank you to St. Martin's Press and NetGalley for the opportunity to read a copy.

TIGHTWADS AND SPENDTHRIFTS by Scott Rick goes straight to the heart of so many relationship issues; our relationships with money--the ones we entered the relationship with and the one we create with one another for better or worse, in harmony or at odds with one another. Beyond the terrible awkwardness of dating a person who calculates the tip with precision rather than offering a generous bounty, money can pervade and poison every aspect of the life we share with another: how we buy, what we buy, how we gift one another, earn our livings. I took to heart the examples he shared, cringing a bit at my own past and yet feeling hopeful and empowered to work with my partner and friends for good. I received a copy of this book and these opinions are my own, unbiased thoughts.

Dr. Rick defines a tightwad as a person who has difficulty spending money. A spendthrift is a person who has difficulty controlling spending. Research shows that conflict revolving around money is the second leading cause of divorce in the United States, with infidelity being the leading cause.

This book explains why money should be considered when choosing a partner, how money should be handled within the relationship, and how money should be used in raising children. The ultimate goal is finding a balance between financial and psychological well-being.

I chose this book because I tend to enjoy spending money and my husband tends to have difficulty spending. I am not an extreme spendthrift and he is not an extreme tightwad, but we definitely have different spending/saving styles.

The author did an excellent job blending the psychological and financial concepts in this book. Financial beliefs are deeply engrained and have often been in place since childhood. Communication and compromise are required to work out a financial plan that is satisfactory to both partners in a marriage.

I read Chapter 7, "The Secret Language of Gifts", about three weeks before Christmas. It is always hard for me to purchase a gift for my husband. Dr. Rick believes that gift-giving occasions are important opportunities to make our partners feel seen and appreciated. He recommends giving gifts that require some kind of sacrifice. It should be clear to your partner that your gift was not easy to select or obtain. This advice really touched me and helped me choose appropriate Christmas gifts for my husband.

You might be surprised to learn that the author does not believe that complete financial transparency is necessary among financially mismatched partners. He suggests that financial translucency (partial financial transparency) is likely to strike the right balance between financial and relationship well-being.

This is an amazing book that should be required reading for everyone in a relationship that requires the blending of finances. Highly recommended!

Thank you to St. Martin's Press for the opportunity to read and review this one early! I have been in a big financial literacy kick lately and was excited to get a book that focuses specifically on finances in relationships, particularly marriage.

I am wholeheartedly a spendthrift - whoops. And I married a tightwad. So much of this book provides tangible conversations to have or ideas to make your financial health work together - plus I was very interested in all the research they complied and shared.

While I have no interest in having kids, there is a chapter on navigating finances with kids, which I enjoy; I wish I had more financial literacy conversations with my parents while growing up.

Overall, a fantastic self-help read.