Matt Hay didn't realize that his hearing was different from everyone else's until he was finally diagnosed with hearing loss in young adulthood. Due to NF2, a rare genetic disease, he would eventually lose all hearing. Without knowing when that would happen, Matt decided to commit to memory some of his favorite songs that brought up his favorite memories, so that even when he lost his hearing he'd be able to hear the music in his mind. So that's where the title comes from - but this book is less about the music and more about one man's story of falling in love and losing his hearing al at the same time.... about the challenges he faces with his wife and alone..... about the surgeries that help in some ways but bring on new difficulties as well... and about a man trying to not just survive, but also trying be the partners that women he loves deserves.

You’d think that just when you’re going off to college, and you find out that you will at some point be completely deaf because of tumors caused by a genetic condition known as NF2 would be difficult enough, but what Matt Hay goes through is far more harrowing than *just* total hearing loss.

In this memoir we learn that Matt had been compensating for his hearing his entire life but didn’t fully realize that by tricking the school nurse administering the hearing test each year, that’s what he was doing. Until he tries to go to West Point, and he can’t fool the person who conducts the hearing test for a career in the military, and he finds out the truth that his hearing has been diminishing year after year and will continue to do so until he has no hearing at all.

He manages to get through college and meets Nora. She’s a medical student who has a father with a disability. Matt goes through a lot of unimaginably horrific things, but falling in love with someone who understands what he’s going through way better than most is at least a saving grace.

As the title suggests, there is a lot about the music he committed to memory before going deaf, and this is a theme throughout. The endless operations are difficult to read about and the details of certain aspects of what he went through were often over my head, but this is intriguing, and the writing is good.

NetGalley provided an advance copy of this memoir, which RELEASES JANUARY 9, 2024.

Synopsis (from Netgalley, the provider of the book for me to review.)
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As a child, Matt Hay didn’t know his hearing wasn’t the way everyone else processed sound—and like a lot of kids who do workarounds to fit in, even the school nurse didn’t catch his condition at the annual hearing and vision checks. But as a prospective college student who couldn’t pass the entrance requirements for West Point, Hay’s condition, generated by a tumour, was unavoidable: his hearing was going, and fast.

The Soundtrack of Silence was his determined compensation for his condition: a typical Midwestern kid growing up in the 1980s, whose life events were pegged to pop music, Hay planned to commit his favourite songs to memory, a mental playbook not only of the bands he loved but a way to tap his most resonant memories. And the track he needed to cement most clearly? The one he and his new girlfriend Nora—the love of his life—listened to in the car on their first date.

Made vivid with references to instantly recognizable songs—from The Eagles to Elton John, Bob Marley to Bing Crosby, U2 to Peter Frampton—Soundtrack of Silence asks readers to run the soundtrack of their own lives through their minds. And, like much of the music it invokes, it’s, in the end, a happy story: Hay does marry the girl of his dreams, complex and cutting-edge surgeries allow him via implant and linked external devices to partially hear, and he’s able to share lullaby time with his and Nora’s children.

I am one of those rare people who likes silence – I do enjoy 80s songs (the soundtrack of my high school days) when they show up in movies and TV shows, but I cannot drive with the radio on as traffic is crazy… as are insurance rates. I had not been to a concert in 30+ years until my sister took me to hear both Adele and Taylor Swift this summer … Taylor’s was like sitting beside an airplane engine with 65000 screaming, crying crazy young Americans and Adele’s was like being in a really big living room with your new best friend. I think that it will be another 30 years before I go to another concert.

I loved Matt’s story as I can understand why he wanted to commit those songs to memory - and I am darn glad that he was able to have surgery and make music a part of his life again as it was so important to him. (My brother is a 70’s music addict --- the stereo is on 24-7 in his home, and he drives all over North America to go to hear groups I have never heard of and his kids inherited his love of music as well, so I can see and understand what Matt was doing!) I am kind of glad, though, that it kept him out of West Point but that is the pacifist in me speaking … um, writing.

An excellent book that I loved every page of. Highly recommended.

I was drawn to this topic due to a close personal connection with someone with an acoustic neuroma that required multiple surgeries to get under control (similar to yet different from Hay's case). Hays delightfully weaves music from the time period in and out of his very personal story filled with moving descriptions of his challenging surgeries and recoveries, the pressure these put on his relationships, marriage, identity, ego, etc. Hays shows amazing fortitude, sticking to recovery with the goal of running a marathon, participating in a triathlon, being there for his family. He manages to live every day to the fullest, despite his enormous auditory challenges. I appreciate Hays bringing his story forward, as it provided me with a better understanding of and sympathy for the hearing impaired/deaf.

The only reason I read this book, was because I liked the title (a very nice playlist of verses of songs was mentioned throughout the book). I really want that playlist! So, basically, Matt is losing his hearing, and before he loses it completely, he wants to remember certain songs.

He was diagnosed with a rare condition called NF2 which caused tumors in his brain that affected his hearing loss and balance issues. He did have hearing aids, which helped, but it was never perfect. Later, he did a get an Auditory Brainstem Implant (ABI) when he lost his hearing for good. It has helped him hear better, but again, it will never be perfect.

I will mention, and tell you, that this is much more about Matt’s story than music.

He had a lot of up and downs in regard to surgeries. It was nice that he wasn’t alone in this, as he had the support and help from his family and from his girlfriend and her family (whom he eventually married). She put her career and schooling on hold.

He persevered and ended up running in a marathon and participated in an Ironman competition. He got married and they have three kids. Would the kids be prone to NF2? That was something else they had to consider. Thankfully, the answer was no after a lot of research.

At a few points in the book, I wanted to cry in tears of happiness for him.

I really enjoyed his honesty about everything he has gone through and am looking forward to reading more about him in the future.

I can kind of relate to him as I have a rare vocal cord condition called Abductor Spasmodic Dysphonia and when I was first diagnosed in 2006, I thought eventually, I may end up not being able to speak. I was terrified and thought, well, I can learn sign language or use a computer to speak for me. Fortunately, that never happened as the treatments of speech therapy and Botox injections have helped me tremendously. Most of the time, when I speak, you can’t even notice that I have ABSD. Unfortunately, many other people with the same condition, have barely any voice at all.