TW: Racism, language, bullying, favoritism, classism, eating disorder, peer pressure, drinking, smoking, child abandonment, toxic relationships, toxic parent relationships

*****SPOILERS*****
About the book:Laure Mesny is a perfectionist with an axe to grind. Despite being constantly overlooked in the elite and cutthroat world of the Parisian ballet, she will do anything to prove that a Black girl can take center stage. To level the playing field, Laure ventures deep into the depths of the Catacombs and strikes a deal with a pulsating river of blood.The primordial power Laure gains promises influence and adoration, everything she’s dreamed of and worked toward. With retribution on her mind, she surpasses her bitter and privileged peers, leaving broken bodies behind her on her climb to stardom.But even as undeniable as she is, Laure is not the only monster around. And her vicious desires make her a perfect target for slaughter. As she descends into madness and the mystifying underworld beneath her, she is faced with the ultimate choice: continue to break herself for scraps of validation or succumb to the darkness that wants her exactly as she is—monstrous heart and all. That is, if the god-killer doesn’t catch her first.
Release Date: August 29th, 2023
Genre: YA Horror
Pages: 339
Rating: ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ (3.5)

What I Liked:
1. Laure felt like a complicated character
2. Some graphic gory scenes
3. Ohhhh that cover 😍
4. Kristolyn Lloyd's voice was perfect for the audiobook

What I Didn't Like:
1. The obsession with Josephine was over the top
2. Slow moving book
3. Laure's constant insecurity becomes annoying
4. Characters got on my nerves

Overall Thoughts:
When I was 8 - 10 I took ballet. I hated it and clearly not a ballerina. So today I question why I continue to get books that deal with ballet. My interest in hearing about it is like non-existent. But I've heard how creepy this book is so it peaked my interest a lot. This book is definitely heavy heavy on the ballet where I thought it would be more horror.

Laure's obsession with Josephine got on my nerves. Page upon page about how wonderful she is and how everyone is in awe of her.

Then you get EVERY page of Laure's constant insecurity. That she isn't good enough - why is she even there... Seriously it's way too much. I get never feeling good enough but it just felt like so much - too much.

Book felt more fantasy than horror. Yeah, there were some moments where horror happens but it's not a main focus of this book. I felt a little hoodwinked. Horror dragged me in but lack of horror took me out.

Everyone has a French name but an American accent so I'm confused...

I would have loved to know why she didn't like her dad and why her mom left. How did she find herself at this place?

I was confused how Acheron (the river in Hades) was in this book in France when it's a Greek river.

Final Thoughts:
I struggled to finish this book but I'll be honest it was just okay. I don't know if I'll really even remember that much in a month. The writing style was really good - a feat that can be difficult in Ya.

Ultimately I ended up dnfing this book around page 150. I really tried to get into the concept but the ballet is way too much. Also it read too young. I get Laure's perspective being young but then when you get the older people they even read younger. As a person who's not competitive and never joined a sport (hated my ballet years) - I found it very tedious listening to these people be very competitive toward one another and very petty.

I did enjoy how unique this story is. I know I'm not an own voices but I loved that the author gave us a story of a ballerina who is Black in a world where the dancers are all usually Caucasians. The struggle to be taken seriously and be seen as the great dancer she is and not her skin color.

Recommend For:
• People that love Black Swan
• Own voices for Black people
• The human struggle
• Ballet or French lovers

IG | Blog

[Thanks to Netgalley and Macmillan Audio for this advanced copy of the book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.]

I ended up DNFing this at 22%. I’m not sure if this story is not for me, or not for me right now. I think my main challenge with the book was the pacing and the placement of the inciting event. The story felt slow because most of the book so far was building the atmosphere of the ballet academy.

Like I said, I might revisit this in the future, but I’m unsure.

I voluntarily listened and reviewed an advance copy of this audiobook. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

I enjoyed this book so much that I also asked for the audio. The narrator allowed me to feel as though I was watching this happen right in front of me. I thought I loved this book as just the ebook but the audio has me wanting to add this in a physical copy to my collection. One of my top books of the year. This story follows Laure Mesny. Laure is a black ballerina who is striving to be the best and be a part of the Paris Ballet Company. She is number one in her class. There are several rumors about how the top dancers get there. Drinking blood or taking her from other dancers to get to the top. Laure’s desperation to get to the top has her lured to the Paris catacombs where she makes a deal with a demon.

Thank you Macmillan Audio, Macmillan Young Listeners and Netgalley for the opportunity to listen to this ALC in exchange for an honest review.

Thank you to NetGalley and Macmillan Audio for the audio ARC!

The vibes of this were everything! Black Swan meets Ace of Spades in this dark origin story of a ballerina who wants power, influence, and recognition, and will go to any lengths to get it. As the only Black girl in her Parisian ballet company, Laure is tired of getting overlooked and discriminated against. When she strikes a deal with a hungry, primordial entity who promises her the success she has always dreamed of, things quickly begin to spiral out of control.

I absolutely adored this book! Creepy and atmospheric with dark academia vibes and a slow-burn monster romance subplot? Yes, please. The setting was intriguing, and the characters were well fleshed out and engaging. One of my favorite debuts of the year, if I hadn't loved the ending so much, I would have said this should be a series!

I don't think this narration was really for me. I felt like I missed some sections of the book. I think part of that wa because of how flat the lines were read outside of the "monster" scenes. This is already a book comparing the "monster" within to actually becoming a monster so there were a lot of blurred lines.

3.5 stars. And apparently more to come! If you enjoy fictional worlds of the ballet, but with monsters, then this is the novel for you!
Laure Mesny is an amazing ballerina that just isn't given her due, no matter how hard she works. She makes a deal w/ an ancient god (demon?) and takes her glory from all the other students, instructors and patrons of the Paris Ballet.
But something is murdering her friends and making life more difficult than it should be with all of Laure's new powers. Will Laure be able to save herself and the rest of her friends from this god-killer?

*Special thanks to NetGalley and Macmillan Audio for this audio e-arc.*

What would you give to get what you want? In the incredible competition of ballet an advantage is gained by making a bargain with a supernatural beast. Fullfilling your end feeds the beast an turns you into one.

This was a weird book, well written but weird, & I there were multiple parts where I felt like I missed something. Maybe that’s because of all the ballet terms that were used. If you’re a fan of the movie black swan I think you will really like this book.

Thank you Netgalley for the advance audiobook copy of I Feed Her to the Beast and the Beast is Me by Jamison Shea in exchange for an honest review. This was an immersive book looking into the life of a black ballet dancer in Paris and all the struggles she dealt with. Wonderfully written and easy to empathize with her.

Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for a free ALC of this book in exchange for an honest review.

This book was deliciously addictive. I didn't want to stop listening! The narrator has such a nice, smooth voice that perfectly fits this story. I loved the slow burn of the story, and how it perfectly weaves together horror, thriller, and romance. This scratched the itch for a story like Black Swan that I didn't even know I had. I will definitely read more from Jamison Shea!

I recently completed "I Feed the Beast and the Beast is Me," and I must say that my journey through its pages left me with mixed feelings. While I can appreciate the author's attempt to delve into the intricate world of ballet and the challenges faced by its inhabitants, I found myself struggling to remain engaged throughout the story.

The ballet setting, undoubtedly captivating to those familiar with the art, presented a hurdle for me as someone less acquainted with its nuances. The intricacies of the ballet culture occasionally left me feeling a bit disengaged and disconnected from the characters. It seemed as though the story assumed a certain level of familiarity with this world, making it challenging to fully immerse myself in their experiences. I have read and enjoyed other ballet-focused books, so I am not exactly sure what was missing for me in this case.

Furthermore, the cast of characters within the novel struggled to maintain my attention. While I could sense the depth the author aimed to infuse, I found it difficult to form a strong connection with them. Their personalities often felt distant. In a tale that revolves around characters navigating a world as demanding as ballet, a stronger emotional link would have greatly enriched the reading experience.

Perhaps the most significant contributor to my mixed feelings was the pacing of the novel. The story progressed at a deliberate pace, but very slow to me, personally. While I understand the desire to build tension and anticipation, there were moments when I found myself yearning for more rapid developments to hold my interest.

In conclusion, "I Feed the Beast and the Beast is Me" presents an ambitious narrative set in the captivating world of ballet. However, perhaps there is difficulty in engaging readers who aren't already entranced by this dance culture, coupled with characters that struggled to maintain a strong presence, and a pace that bordered on sluggish. While I may not have found myself fully enamored by this novel, I recognize that others with a greater affinity for ballet might discover the magic that eluded me.

Also- I found the narrator's voice to be annoying every time she attempted to be the "monster". Not believable at all.

This was a deliciously dark YA thriller about a Black ballerina trying to make it in Paris who strikes up a Faustian bargain with a monster below the city in exchange for the power to overcome discrimination and dance her way into the spotlight.

Great on audio narrated by Kristolyn Lloyd and perfect for fans of authors like Tiffany D. Jackson or Liselle Sambury. I loved that this book looked at the gritty side of ballet, twisting one Black girl's ambitions and rage into something monstrous and bloodthirsty!

Many thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for an early audio copy in exchange for my honest review. What a FANTASTIC debut!! I can't wait to read what Jamison Shea writes next!

I did enjoy this story and exploring of racism within the ballet industry. I, also enjoyed the need and help of the MC being that she came from very little and wanted to succeed. The plot was very interesting and currently a belief to a lot of people in real life. Overall I do wish the story moved a little faster, I found myself feeling stall at times.

I wanted to like this book more than I did; however, I know that this book is going to be enjoyed by so many readers. The premise excited me, so I was elated when I was approved to receive an ARC from the publisher through NetGalley. I started out enjoying the book, but as it progressed, I found myself detached from the characters. I loved the discussion of racism and felt so angry that crap like that still happens today, but I didn't enjoy the supernatural elements. The main message I received from this book is that the villain is not always the villain and just because something appears evil doesn't mean it's fully evil, which is a great idea, but I just felt like the cutthroat world of ballet and the evil god storylines were battling it out, which took me out of it.

Thank you to NetGalley and Macmillan Audio for a chance to early review this story in exchange for an honest review.

First off, many thanks to NetGalley for letting me read this book as an audio ARC! I greatly appreciate it!

I was really hoping this would be a five-star read, and it came so, so close!

The characters were well-written and unlikable at the same time, so you have to admire them. That's hard to do! Likable unlikable characters are always super interesting!

And the settings! I did ballet for sixteen years, so I was absolutely thrilled with the settings! Even the Palais Garnier was included! Incredible!

I also really loved that the author didn't gloss over the brutality of ballet. It's not just an art form, it's extraordinarily hard work, and I was impressed to see that acknowledged!

The only reason I'm not giving this five stars is the amount of characters who don't seem to do much for the story. I get that some background characters are necessary, but deer boy could absolutely have been cut and Coralie put in his place as both antagonist and love interest. It would've been so much more impactful! The romance just felt very tacked-on. There's no chemistry there, but I was really shocked it wasn't revealed that Coralie was in love with Laure, because that was where all the (Very toxic, don't get me wrong!) chemistry was.

I loved this book! And I loved the narrator's performance! 4.5 stars out of 5!

I’m usually neutral on recommending one format vs another but this book was really well done on audio and if you like audiobooks I would chose that format if it’s available to you!

I saw a a random video that I forgot to like or save on TikTok talk about how this book was really good so I requested it when I saw the audiobook pop up on NetGalley. That’s it. That’s all I knew going into it and I had a great fucking time listening to this book.

This is the author’s debut novel, it’s YA Horror. It’s not scary in my opinion. More like a gothic vibe? I’m a chicken and I was fine. The book is about a black girl named Laure and the Paris ballet. She’s excellent but constantly overlooked (you know why) and is desperate to prove herself and be the star of the stage! You know when people say “I support women’s rights but also women’s wrongs”? That’s this book. Laure makes a deal with a demon for power and influence. Said demon deal involves the very creepy catacombs of Paris and a creepy blood river/lake.

It looks like this is a duology, I see a second book on Goodreads called I Am The Dark That Answers When You Call! I didn’t think the ending was like a huge cliffhanger or anything at all. Love that. I actually didn’t realize it was a duology until the day after I read the book.

If a book about cutthroat ballerinas being absolutely unhinged, monstrous, and messy sounds good to you, totally check this out. It’s very fast paced and super dark. It comes out next week!

This was my first encounter with horror and my goodness, I am hooked. I loved the way my heart raced and not truly knowing what to expect. The character’s monologue, although at times did drag, was so powerful, personal, realistic, painful, and uniquely hers.
The story was haunting and so very realistic in terms of society and doing what it takes to succeed and go after a dream. And sometimes that means dabbling in evil.
I am so excited for this book to come out for more people to read.
Thank you for the opportunity!

First, let me just say that I was drawn to this book because of the book's cover. This cover is so creepy and yet beautiful that I was like, yes I want to read this.

This is a Dark Horror Thriller which focuses on Lauren Mesney. Lauren is a talented ballerina in Paris who has a dream of being a Prima Ballerina (Principal Dancer). Lauren soon realizes that even though she is talented she can not seem to garner the respect of her peers in the ballet or the board members because she does not come from a wealthy family. Lauren soon discovers that the world of ballet is very cut throat, bias, prejudice, and classicist.
Lauren's parents left her at a young age, and the only thing that has kept her has been her love for dance. Lauren is best friends with CoraLee who is not as talented as Lauren, but has been given opportunities because of her parents wealth and her mother Rosemarie status of once being a Principal dancer for the ballet company. They are friends because Lauren depends heavily on support of Cora Lee, as long as she does not interfere with her dreams. This friendship is a real co dependence on one another for support.

Lauren is over come with frustration with the Paris Ballet Company that one night she befriends Josephine. Josephine is the Principal Ballerina for the Company, and has received the wealth, respect and notoriety that Lauren wants. Josephine takes Lauren to the lower levels of the underground world of Paris where no one goes. Lauren learns how Josephine has been able to reach the top of the Ballet World by learning of the dark ritual activities Josephine and others have done. This blood ritual where she gives her soul to Ackeron so she can have fame, respect and wealth in the Paris Ballet.
Lauren soon finds out that even with the ritual that it is still not easy for her to break through this privileged backstabbing and cut throat world of ballet culture.
Discover how far Lauren and others are going to go for the prestige of Principal Ballerina. How much of their soul are they willing to give? Can they come back from the world they are spiraled in?
Get ready for a very, very dark horror story!
I want to say Thank you so very much Net galley, Macmillan Audio and Henry Holt and Company for this opportunity to experience this audio arc. I am grateful. I give this story 4 shining star!

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8F9Np3d/


4.5 ✨
I loved this one! Wow, I heard someone talking about this book, and raving about it, and I had to have it. It didn’t disappoint either. The fact that this one was dark ballet vibes sold me so fast. I always love books and movies about ballet and this one definitely lived up to why I do so much. The writing was good and enjoyable. There were no hick ups for me except the slow parts when the climax was approaching. Otherwise, I still highly recommend this for Halloween Read!

Was this supposed to be YA? I think maybe it was. I don’t read a lot of YA works so I don’t think I am the target audience for this debut novel. I dug the cover and title though and was pleased to get a review audiobook from NetGalley. Thanks, NetGalley!

An interesting premise with a few lags here and there in the narrative, but nonetheless an entertaining and well written debut.