The Book of Mothers

This is a great collection of ideas discussing how we form ideas of motherhood and the mothering experience from literature. This is one I'll return to again and again. Many thanks to the author, publisher, and NetGalley for the advanced copy of the book.

Mothers have always felt like the least interesting characters until I became one and developed a voracious appetite for stories about pregnancy and motherhood. In The Book of Mothers, Carrie Mullins argues that it is not so much a fault of my own that I found these characters irrelevant, but a societal practice of ignoring the interior of women’s lives that has made mothers so invisible. This collection of essays breathes new life into well known characters and centers their experiences as mothers and care givers.

Mullins examines both classical and more contemporary literature, mining these stories for messages about what it means to be a woman. Some characters are obvious- think Mrs. Bennet from Pride and Prejudice- and others are unexpected, like Mrs. Weasley in Harry Potter. Although I eagerly downloaded this book in the hopes of engaging in reflective work on motherhood, I was pleasantly surprised to find myself delving into topics ranging from The Real Housewives to political history, and the relationship between popular culture and misogyny. Throughout the book, Mullins reminds the reader that motherhood and domesticity is much bigger, much more complex than any characterture of a marm in a shapeless cardigan could ever capture.

Mullins shows us that motherhood is an extraordinary experience, impossible to fully grasp, and at the same time, it is an incredibly ordinary and banal experience. Many things can be true at the same time. I most enjoyed Cullin’s exploration of duality, like the thin line between maternal love and maternal rage and how motherhood can erase and suffocate your sense of self while also providing the space to process a lifetime of navigating micro aggressions and conflicting expectations.

While it is not new to suggest that misogyny has marginalized domestic stories, this collection of essays offers plenty of timely and fresh analysis, including (yet another) dissection of the Handmaid’s Tale. Mullins writes that regardless of pregnancy, women are time and again reduced to womb and the implications of this are far reaching.

This is a book I will purchase so I can take it off my shelf and show to every mom friend who visits. It’s the kind of book I will highlight quotations to send to friends and family when one of us is in need of validation for our feelings.

Mullins interprets literary mothers as more complicated and complete characters, ones that have value to readers who share more than just an experience giving birth or caring for children. They are entry points into what it means to be human and to find purpose in this world. As much as I found these essays valuable beyond motherhood and as convincing as I found the evidence that mothers are not minor or irrelevant characters, I struggle to see this book being read by anyone who is not, well, a mother. I hope these essays find their way to a larger audience.

Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for the ARC for review.

Summary

A culturally relevant dissection of motherhood that compares literary mother figures to their contemporary counterparts while highlighting issues that plauge parents today.

Reading Experience

I loved this book! It was everything a non-fiction book should be. It was well written in accessible language, fast-paced, had a clear structure, and research was well sighted. The list of sources provided has basically become my TBR list.

Reading it felt like sitting down with my best friend over a glass of wine and discussing our motherhood journeys. No book has ever described my early motherhood mental state better.

I loved the diversity of topics covered within the book. Everything from anxiety to the overturning of Roe vs. Wade was included. No faceted of motherhood was left uncovered.

This was an incredibly validating read.

Who This Book Is For

If you are someone who wants to understand the nuances of motherhood read this book. Fans of Emily Oster (Cribsheet), Pamela Druckerman (Bringing Up Bebe), and Linda Åkeson McGurk (There is No Such Thing as Bad Weather) should run and order a copy.