A very funny/snarky Southern California PI crime novel. Extremely well written. Plotted perfectly and character driven. Fantastic fun

Private investigator Priest is on the case as he tries to help find his friend Dusty's girlfriend. At the same time, a boy Tarquin shows up claiming Priest is his father. Priest tries to be there for Tarquin while still investigating and helping out his friend. Overall, a fast-paced book filled with quirky characters with many twists and turns. It took a little while to get into the book's writing style, but it was engaging.

A page turner of truest kind. I got whiplash from the unexpected twists and turns in this inspired tale from Hanson. A suspense novel, a laugh out loud comedy and an action packed novel all in one. I want more stories about “Priest”, a former Seminarian, and Dusty, a bodyguard/stuntwoman, chasing the bad guys.

Xavier “Priest” Priestly is a licensed freelance legal investigator, who gets to charge exorbitant prices to the law firms that hire him because he’s extraordinarily good at what he does. His nickname comes less as a play on his surname than it does from the fact that he once studied for the Catholic priesthood, abandoning the seminary after several years to pursue a degree in criminology instead. Even a decade removed from his religious studies, he’s still struck by the similarities between his current profession and his former vocation, not least of which is an irreverence that often casts a wry eye on humanity itself:

QUOTE
“Asking the public for help in an investigation is a desperate, last-ditch measure,” the ex-detective had lectured [Priest’s class], “because the public is stupid, paranoid, venal, forgetful, duplicitous, suggestible, excitable, and flighty. Write that down.”

The lecture had reminded Priest of one Jesuit in seminary who taught that the Bible was so crammed with revelation and metaphor that untrained laymen would only be overwhelmed. Priests, the Jesuits had taught, were the only experts who could be trusted.

Preferably, Jesuit priests.

Meaning: <i>Suck on it, Protestants</i>.
END QUOTE

His past is no secret and neither is his colorful present, surrounded as he is by the quirky and, generally, well-meaning. When his best friend in all the world decides to hire him to find her girlfriend, his initial reaction is offense at the idea that she would offer him money to do so. Dusty Queen, professional stuntwoman and bodyguard, is not to be deterred. They’ve been in enough shady situations together for her to understand the value of hiding behind client privilege, especially in cases where extralegal means may have to come into play.

For Dusty has recently become enamored of a sex worker she was hired to protect, who goes by the unlikely name of Nikki Celeste. When Nikki goes missing, the only person who’s concerned is Dusty. Everyone else assumes that Nikki just went off on a wild bender with her latest rich client, and conveniently forgot to tell Dusty before doing so. After a little asking around, Priest himself isn’t so sure that that isn’t the case here, until he’s unexpectedly assaulted and nearly killed by a figure in a blue wig.

Given that Priest can’t remember enough to identify his assailant, the police suspect that Dusty might have had something to do with it. Even his lawyer Baz Amberson thinks that there might be a glimmer of truth in Police Detective Garnet Diodato’s theory. Priest, of course, refuses to believe that his best friend would ever harm him:

QUOTE
“If Diodato’s so good, why is he wasting time looking at Dusty?”

“First, he’s doing his job. And second…”

“Yeah? And second?”

“I thought my dramatic pause conveyed my message better than words,” Baz said.

“Oh, c’mon! It’s Dusty!”

“I think you see Dusty differently than most people do,” Baz said. “If I didn’t know better, I’d think you were one of those couples destined to stay married for decades and then die within a couple of days of each other.”

“Oh, c’mon! Dusty prefers women, and I’m not one of those people who’s gonna pine away for someone who’s unattainable.”

“I’ll give you that,” Baz said. “You turned your back on God in a hot flash.”
END QUOTE

As Priest and Dusty investigate, they come across all sorts of weird setbacks and complications, including one that could change the trajectory of Priest’s life forever. Will they be able to figure out who wants Priest dead, as well as where Dusty’s girlfriend has disappeared to, before the former finishes the job and Nikki, perhaps unrelatedly, vanishes for good?

Hilarious, intelligent and heartfelt, this thriller from the creator of the hit TV show Bones is a page-turner from start to finish, melding modern-day comedic crime caper hijinks a la Carl Hiaasen with a dash of G. K. Chesterton’s Father Brown. Hart Hanson is a master of weaving disparate plot elements into one impressive whole: you know when he’s foreshadowing, but the resulting plot twists far outstrip any conventional expectations. I thoroughly enjoyed this book, with its diverse cast, ingenious story and excellent pacing, and fervently hope that The Seminarian is only the first novel in a blockbuster series.

Also posted on Goodreads
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/200356556

Quirky, irreverent, humorous, and cleverly plotted…
Reminds me somewhat of both of Robert Crais but with better drawn sidekicks. Also of Carl Hiassen, with the slapstick blended into a plot which makes the whole closer to compelling than Hiassen’s cartoonish. The plot and sidebars are inventive, the characters interesting and engaging…. For me this book was actually hard to put down… and the main character Priest’s overarching spiritual journey in reverse, complexed and then contradicted by his sudden new personal relationship and his eventual embrace of its responsibilities is delightfully clever. Can I read the next one yet?

Private investigator Xavier "Priest" Priestly does not lead a quiet or normal life in Los Angeles, which makes this book a wild ride from start to finish. Priest's life spirals after his friend, Dusty Queen, asks him to find her missing girlfriend, he is almost killed by a woman in a blue wig, and a son he didn't know he had shows up looking for him. Heartwarming in a wacky way, full of action, mystery, and quirky characters, this is a refreshingly unique read. Fingers crossed this is the start of a series!

My expectations were high for a book by the man who created one of my favorite TV shows ever, and this was exactly the combination of mystery, ridiculousness, and twists and turns that I couldn't have guessed even if I tried.

It takes a bit to get into because Priest is an odd guy - he's not quite eccentric, more like irreverent. There's definitely emotional baggage to his family life and the adjustment of his faith that's made him keep a river between himself and other people. It's nearly impossible to cross and he enjoys being obscure and hard to understand to other people.

Life gets crazy for Priest. His bestie Dusty Queen has a missing girlfriend, he gets attacked and drugged in his own garage and can't remember anything except it was a woman in a Blue Wig, and then the surprises KEEP ON COMING. There's a lot of layers to this story and some of them connect to the bigger mystery and some of them don't, and some of them you're sure they have nothing to do with anything and then they're super important.

The group of people Priest surrounds himself with is fun and diverse in skill set, identity, personality, and feelings regarding legality. It was an enjoyable romp.

There's one plot point where everyone was mad at Priest, and I kind of get why, but at the same time...like...Priest had a point.

This is also pretty bloody and violent in certain points, so be ready for that.

Anyway, this was fun, and if he decides to write another Priest book I'd read it.

The Seminarian is about Xavier Priestly, an investigator in Venice Beach, CA. His friend, Dusty Queen comes to him with a case.
Hart Hanson has experience writing interesting and quirky characters.
This is on full display with this novel.
The cast of characters and situations all work perfectly together.
I honestly look forward to a second book.

verbal-humor, situational-humor, suspense, action, mystery, mysteries, hit-man, friendship, friends, relationships, murder, investigations, kinky, private-investigators, hilarious*****

This story is so laugh your sox off funny that giggles and guffaws can't come close to my reactions reading this book! Xavier "Priest" Priestly was a seminarian now works as a free-lance Legal Investigator for both sides of the bench as well as private clients. His friend Dusty needs him to find an escort, Nikki Celeste and investigating her disappearance leads to Priest being attacked and drugged. He only remembers a woman in a blue wig. Then there's this young boy who turns up claiming that Priest is his father. The characters most certainly are, and the plot twists and spirals like a double helix! Crazy fun!
I requested and received a free temporary EARC from Blackstone Publishing via NetGalley. Thanks!
Pub Date May 21 2024

I loved this novel! Thank you author,Hart Hanson,publisher Blackstone and NetGallery for the opportunity to read the ebook,The Seminarian. Every character was quirky,interesting as you may find in many black comedies either in books or movies.You really never expect what the next page will be suddenly brought into the storyline’s action.The main character is a private detective who lives in Venice,CA bythe beach boardwalk near the Venice pier. I could picture where a lot of the story takes place having been to Venice many times when living in the LA area. The author,H.H. writes with a great sense of humor and had written several tv shows in the past that were quite successful.
Book on sale May 21,2024

When I first started this book I didn't think I was going to like it for some reason?! But I'm glad I stuck with it! I thoroughly enjoyed reading this one! This book was funny, had suspense, intrigue, action, murder, mystery, hired hitmen, and some crazy twists and turns! The storyline was very interesting and kept me glued to my kindle! I definitely recommend reading this book as it was well worth reading! Thank you Netgalley and the publisher for sharing this book with me!

Of course a man named Xavier 'X' Priestly, aka The Priest, is an ex-Seminarian. It seems like a demented twist of fate, which pretty much sums up this delightfully wacky and wild crime novel. The characters in The Seminarian are so bright, colorful and vivid that you'll need sunglasses to read this bookl, which is perfect, because you will look cool and be in the right frame of mind for this kinky, irreverent romp. If you love Carl Hiaasen and Tim Dorsey, this sly, over-the-top novel is for you.

The creator and writer of the TV show "Bones", introduces a wacky cast of characters in a fast-paced, action-packed novel that would make Tim Dorsey proud. Xavier "Priest" Priestly is a former seminarian turned licensed legal investigator. Dusty Queen is his best friend, a stuntwoman who moonlights as a bodyguard. Dusty has been mooning over an escort, Nikki Celeste, and Nikki's disappearance forces Dusty to hire Priest to find her. Is it this new case that endangers Priest? He's attacked with a stun gun and left in the trunk of his car after being injected with several drugs. When he comes to enough to talk with the police, he only remembers a woman in a blue wig. The searches for Nikki and Priest's attacker are sidetracked when Tarquin, a twelve-year-old boy shows up, claiming Priest is his father. Friends admit Priest can't deny the nose, the family resemblance. When Priest sends Tarquin back to his grandfather in Vegas, everyone in Priest's life disapproves, from Dusty to Priest's fishing buddy to his lawyer. It's going to take some lying and fast work to find Nikki, the attacker, and bring Tarquin home, but smart-alecky Priest is up to it.