Cover Image: I Promise It Won't Always Hurt Like This

I Promise It Won't Always Hurt Like This

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Member Reviews

I’ve been a fan of Clare Mackintosh’s fiction books and was intrigued by her debut into nonfiction. It won’t always hurt like this is incredibly moving and powerful and I’m sure will go on to help many who are grieving. I really appreciated her introduction where she makes clear to the reader to only read what resonates with them and isn’t too painful to read. I read this like a book and I’m glad I did. I know there are chapters I’ll go back to in a future time of need.
Thank you to the author, Netgalley and Sourcebooks for the eARC in exchange for my honest review.

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This didn't work for me as a generalized reflection on grief because it's really specific to the author's loss of her infant son. I would have wanted to hear reflections on losing one twin and how that changes in raising the remaining twin. I really did not get anything out of this but maybe another reader would if they have suffered the loss of a child.

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Thank you so much Clare Mackintosh for writing this book. I lost my dad in 2015 and I still grieve so much. This book really talked to me and I recommend anyone dealing with grief to read this book!

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A reminiscing on grief and the processing of it. Mackintosh takes a very personal approach, sharing her stories of loss and grief to help readers relate. this was a moving book, although very heavy because of the nature of the subject,

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A book that will hug, soothe, cocoon and carry you through grief.

Thanks NetGalley and Source Books (non-fiction) for the ARC.

Clare Mackintosh needs no introduction. She is a celebrated thriller author and we are all big fans of her. When she lost her 5 week old son over 18 years ago, the kind of grief she experienced was simply unimaginable. As she grieved, she realized how it was not linear, rational or fit into any stage. The book she needed then is the gift she has chosen to give us now.

I am no stranger to grief. I have a 7 year old son, but with secondary infertility, I suffered 2 failed rounds of IVF back in 2022. My loss might not be tangible, like losing a baby or a miscarriage. But it’s still a loss, I have grieved, felt it's weight heavy on my heart and to this day end up with painful hot tears at random times, imagining what it would be to hold a toddler in my arms right now, a sibling to my son.

I really appreciated the format Clare adopts in the 18 chapters which discuss the various aspects of grief. The chapters start with snippets of Clare’s own life experiences - which made it very authentic, adding that personal touch, as we understand just how raw, visceral and unspeakably impossible her grief was.

As Clare clarifies, this book is no guide or manual for how to handle the heartache, anguish or helplessness you may feel as you grieve. But it will hold your hand, shine a torch through the darkness, help you by validating and normalizing the pain, the ‘why me’s, the most horrible of thoughts and crushing feelings.

It is rather a promise in so many forms, as it reassures you that - you will emerge on the other side, find purpose, shun the fear, the anger, guilt and exhaustion, that you will not be jealous of others’ happiness, or feel pathetic on anniversaries or uncomfortable with unanswerable questions, slowly discover your happiness again, that you will learn to coexist with the brokenness, you won’t forget and finally that it will not hurt you like this forever.

I went through my own catharsis, cried, came to accept my loss and grief as I read this.

If grief has ever touched you (I hope not), then this book can bring you great comfort.

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As someone currently enduring the grieving process, this book was perfect for me. Clare Mackintosh is raw and truthful, showing a side to an author that readers normally do not get to see. The perspective and the anecdotes provide a humanness that allows a reading to feel connected to other humans. It is definitely a book for the healing.

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Loved this so much. It was a great book even if I myself have not gone through a similar grief process. I think the author did such a good job of making it relatable.

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Its been almost two years since I lost my 10 year old niece and this is the book I have been needing since that loss. Thank you Clare Mackintosh for putting grief on the page in a way I could absolutely resonate and for giving me hope.

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. Almost everybody has had some significant loss in their life, whether it would be loss of parent, spouse, child, friend, etc. Loss effects everybody differently. In this book we see how Clare handles her loss. I think this book is relatable at some point to everyone. Thank you netfalley and the publisher for the arc in exchange for a review.

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Requested this so I can read it at some point. Not sure how I'll feel about it or what kind of state of mind I will need to be in to properly process and enjoy this. But this saying is. Somewhat relevant to my life at the moment.

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I have been a long time fan of Clare Mackintosh’s thriller/mysteries and always admired her writing. I am also a widow and have read a lot about grief. In this work, Clare combines her excellent, sometimes humorous writing with helpful, optimistic words for grievers. I will recommend this to anyone I know who experiences loss. Thank you Sourcebooks and Thoughts from a Page Patreon group for the advanced reader copy.

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I have read several books about grief over the past sixteen months and this book has helped me the most. Author Clare Mackintosh lost a five-week-old son almost 2o years ago. I lost my 22-year-old son in 2022 and my life will never be the same. Mackintosh assures us, the parents of deceased children, that we too, can survive this nearly impossible path in life. This book is for anyone who is struggling with grief. Have the tissues near by. You WILL cry.

I highly recommend this book. Thank you to NetGalley and Sourcebooks for the ARC in exchange for an honest review. This book was released 19 March 2024.

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We lost our nephew last year and when I saw this was written by Clare Mackintosh (I love her mysteries!) I knew I needed to read this... for me, for my sister and for the rest of our family who misses Jake.

It's a very emotional read but I think helpful as well I even listened to the audio version which Clare read it herself.

Thank you Netgalley for the opportunity to read and review. All opinions are my own.

Publication date: 26 March 2024

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An amazing book. She writes for people who have lost a loved one, but it's a wonderful comfort for anyone who's had a major upheaval in their life.

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What a tough, brave book for Mackintosh to write. I've read her thrillers before and very much enjoyed them. I didn't realize she had this sadness in her past. Each chapter she describes a different way grief can affect people, and a different way to try and survive it. I would absolutely hand this to someone who has lost a close person in their lives, so that it would be waiting for them when they are ready.

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It doesn't feel right to rate Clare Mackintosh's non-fiction book about grief, as much of it focuses on the death of her young son, but this is a poignant read and very helpful. Mackintosh wrote it after a tweet about the anniversary of the death of her five-month-old son, Alex, went viral. The book is part memoir/part self-help, with 18 chapters that walk through dealing with grief--with the ultimate promise that we can all make progress with grief, on our own time, at our own pace. She uses stories from her own life, especially losing Alex, as examples. The result is a sad story, but also a hopeful one, and I think many who have been through a loss would find this helpful; I did.

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Beautiful book about a hard topic. As someone who has experienced grief, I resonated with many of her insights and cried my way through parts of the book. Highly recommend.

Thanks to Cindy at Thoughts from a Page for the ARC and author chat.

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Wonderful book for those who have lost a child. Found myself sobbing through many parts. Wonderful wonderful book. Love this author thank you NetGalley and publisher for providing. the advanced copy to me.

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A must-read for people working through grief. As Clare Mackintosh says, this is the book she wished she had when she was in the depths of grief. I love the structure of the book. It is very approachable for people who can only concentrate on small pieces of information at a time. I have loved Clare Mackintosh's novels, but this is my absolutel favorite book of hers.

Thank you to NetGalley and Sourcesbooks for the ARC of I Promise It Won't Always Hurt Like This.

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I confess, I saw Clare Mackintosh's name in NetGalley and I automatically requested her new book. I had read I Let You Go and The Last Party and was waiting for the next installment, A Game of Lies (even though I swear I don't read series), so I did not realize that this was a memoir until I opened it up. Also, I read this right after Sloane Crosley's Grief is for People and honestly, I was thinking, what have I done? I am no stranger to grief, (though who is these days?), but I wasn't quite ready to parse my feelings as much as I did while reading this book.

Mackintosh suffered a horrific tragedy—losing her five week old child—and she is here for anyone who has grieved a loss. Her stunning soul-baring and bracing honesty are the balm you didn't know you needed. She suffers in the open, and she offers no apologies. She puts it all out there, hoping that others will find comfort in their own similar, seemingly irrational perfectly rational feelings. And though she did revive some grief I had hoped was behind me, I felt a sense of understanding and peace in her story. This book is a gift.

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