Who we are in real life was an interesting read, as a adult who was formerly a teen that learned how to cope with serious difficulties in my life partially through DnD and other role playing games I found this a pretty relatable read.

This book was fun and in my opinion did well incorporating DnD into a story without overdoing it. The characters were fun if a little bit flat but overall seemed to fit for their age. I don't have anything amazing to say about this book but also nothing negative to say. It was a fun book and if the story sounds interesting to you I suggest giving it a shot.

Unfortunately I had to DNF fairly early on cause it wasn't quite for me. There was far more D&D than I imagined - half the text was the D&D story and half the text was talking about D&D and as someone who doesn't play D&D and has never played D&D, the book offered no context for non-players. What I did read of the prose was alright but I didn't quite enjoy the MC's attitude so I decided on stopping as it just wasn't for me. (+) sapphic rep, queer disabled author

Thank you to Netgalley, House of Anansi Books Press, and Groundwood Books for giving me this arc in exchange for an honest review!

I was really interested in, "Who We Are in Real Life" by Victoria Koops because of the teen romance centered around loving DND, which I haven't read before. The DND aspects of the book are the most entertaining and atmospheric parts of the book, but they can sometimes feel shoehorned in since they are utilized to further explain the characters actions and feelings. Unfortunately the main characters, Darcy and Art, were not very likable. Darcy is rude to everyone around her including her moms because she was forced to move away from her city (which felt like an extreme reaction). Art is a doormat who rarely stands up for himself, Darcy, or his sister when it came to defending them against homophobia directed to them by his father. The romance between these two characters ended up feeling forced because of how much their morals clashed and the overall lack of chemistry. Based on the actions of the characters I felt like they should not have stayed together. DND was truly the only thing these characters had in common. The plot didn't kick off until half-way through the book and the ending was underwhelming since the main conflict was not high stakes to begin with. I give this book a 2 stars because the fantasy elements were enjoyable.

I'm a big d&d lover so I picked this book expecting a cute, queer romance with a lot of d&d. Overall I think this one ended up falling a little flat for me but that doesn't mean it was a bad book. There were several things that I did like though. I loved the d&d campaign. It was so easy to immerse myself in it. I would have liked to learn more about the other characters in the d&d campaign but I still really enjoyed it. Unfortunately the rest of the book just wasn't for me.

Thank you to the publishers and netgalley for this arc in exchange for an honest review

This book immediately intrigued me - as a D&D player, I really liked the look of both of the characters (both in game and not!). I’m not as much into YA anymore, but I wanted to give it a shot, since there should definitely be more nerdy romances in the world!

This book follows Darcy, who has just moved to a small town so her mom can finally head her own clinic. She’s not happy about it - she leaves behind a group of friends and a D&D game she’s put a lot of effort into, a boyfriend who she thinks she loves, and a community that supports the fact that she has two moms and she herself is bisexual. It feels like a downgrade, to be honest.

Art is a nerdy kid who lives for Game - his mother died years ago and his deeply conservative father threw himself into work, so he’s basically raising himself and his sister. Game is the place where he can have adventures unlike any that are available in the real world. When he meets Darcy, though, everything changes … he wants to live in real life.

This book deals with a lot of heavy subjects, fairly well - homophobia, hate crimes, partner abuse, parental neglect, religious trauma - and it was a great story, switching between Darcy & Art’s stories both in real life and in game. I did feel like the last quarter of the book went by too quickly and things were wrapped up a little too neatly, which was disappointing, but overall I’m glad I read it!

This one is top of mind because I just finished reading it as I type this, and what an intense but ultimately joyful ride! I can only imagine what diehard D&D friends will love about this book, but as a casual observer and sideline enthusiast, I so enjoyed getting to step into that world. The gaming descriptions are immersive and the characters feel real and—at times—achingly relatable as they try to reconcile their D&D selves with their “in real life” selves. This book deals with identity, family trauma, and difficult and abusive relationships, but it ultimately bends towards hope and finding courage in all parts of yourself to do what’s right. This is Koops’s first book, and I can’t wait to see where her marvelous brain takes us next!

Who We Are in Real Life was a book I absolutely wanted to fall head over heels for, but instead I fell... flat. The romance piece was simply not there for me, and though the main character was incredibly lovable, it just wasn't enough to save the book for me.

Oh boy. I really wanted to like this one but uh….yikes. I would start with the positives except I don’t have any, and that’s not for lack of trying.
Firstly, Darcy is just an extremely y likeable character, she’s absolutely horrid to everyone, especially her mothers. It was super weird that she calls them by the their names and not mom, mama or anything like that. It felt like they weren’t actually a family. I get that moving is hard when you’re a teen(I get it more than anyone, I moved across the whole of Canada when I was 13 and it was one of the worst experiences of my life) but that’s no excuse. She’s not very nice to her love interest Art either. In fact, she’s quite often down right horrible to him. Another thing I noticed is that she only wanted to talk about herself and her interests, not him or his.
Secondly, the romance was awful. Art, the other main character, is an apathetic cishet white boy who only cares about queer phobia when it affects his life (eg, when he develops a crush on Darcy, or it affects his sister) it takes the whole book and for Darcy and his sister to call him out before he gets it. Sort of. I have a very hard time rooting for a romance where one half is an ignorant cishet boy who only cares about the queer community when it directly affects him.
The antagonist was barely there, a looming menace that had no real pay off. As someone with a father worse that Art’s, let me just tell you the final fight between him and Art would not have gone that way IRL. It would’ve been so much worse.
As the book went on I found myself increasingly confused as to how much time was taking place between events. Was it a few days? Hours? Weeks? I have no idea. I’d start a new chapter thinking it was the next day but apparently weeks have passed and I’d only find out half way through the chapter. The D&D sections of the book should’ve been the best part but they were just as bad for me: dropped haphazardly throughout the book and honestly dragged the story down. I found the writing to be lacklustre, the pacing off, and none of the characters endearing or likeable in anyway. All the side characters felt like cardboard cutouts.
I really wanted to like this one but alas. 1/5 stars.

Rating: 3.5 stars

I wanted to LOVE this book, but overall I simply like it. This was a decent YA story that bounces between in game and out of game storylines and both have similar story beats and arcs. And I read this in only a couple hours so it definitely was a nice quick read.

I liked the D&D group and their adventure, and I enjoyed getting a glimpse into Darcy’s geek past and her connections with her old gaming store.

What greatly lessened my enjoyment of this story was the queer struggle and hate present in this book. Yes, I know that those of us with a queer identity often face these encounters and issues and struggles. I guess I just wanted this story to be focused on more than just that struggle. Because it felt like 85% of this book was bullying and homophobia and hate, and it took until the very end for a few people to stand up and ally against that treatment. So instead of feeling like a moment of triumph to me, it just felt like a lessening of the burden that was the rest of the book.

So I will say that my rating isn’t because the book wasn’t written well, because it was. And the characters felt real, and their experiences felt real. It was a good book. My rating is purely because of how I personally felt while reading it, and that was that I wasn’t enjoying the feeling. There’s enough discrimination and hatred in the world as it is. And perhaps it is unrealistic to want less of it in my fiction, but I enjoy it so much more when we have stories that celebrate and accept the diversity we would wish to have in the world.

Again, I will say that this book was a good one. Like I said, it only took me a couple hours to read it, so it was captivating enough to keep me reading it. I enjoyed the division of following the in-game adventures and seeing how there were certain parallels to the out-of-game plot. And in the end, the group of friends banding together to stand up against the homophobia of certain leaders in the community was nice.

This is a book I would still recommend, and it is a book I will keep on my shelves, but it won’t be one I recommend as often as I would some of the other TTRPG novels I have read in recent months.

Moderately Enjoyable. The DnD campaign chapters were a highlight, offering an engaging narrative. However, the book struggles with unsubtle parallels to real life. The writing feels somewhat dated, with cringe-worthy moments such as the use of "precious cinnamon roll." Additionally, the frequent abrupt endings to scenes and off-screen resolutions create a disjointed reading experience, especially with the QSA plot. Darcy's initial characterization as a brat and standoffish personality takes time to warm up to, but her eventual transformation is a redeeming aspect. Despite these shortcomings, the book manages to be somewhat enjoyable, striking a balance between its issues and engaging elements.

I had high hopes for this book, but it really fell short for me. I mean, it was a bit like Mythic Quest meets YA but with worse execution. The pacing was very inconsistent with some parts dragged out and others feeling incredibly rushed. The chapters that were from their DND characters’ POV felt dropped in randomly without any thought put in. Honestly, the way that was executed took away from the story instead of adding anything for me and felt like it bogged things down.

Also, the events and obstacles were all very repetitive in a frustrating, boring, and predictable way. And most characters fell short for me too. Both main characters annoyed me and I actively disliked Art by the end. Honestly, I wish that Dawn was the main character. I liked her much more than the main characters and would have preferred a story from her POV.

Excited about the intersection of queerness and D&D, I found this book fell short overall, giving it a 2.5/5 instead of a 1/5 due to redeeming qualities. Koops excelled in portraying the D&D campaign, creating an engaging fantasy world. However, the introduction of the "shitty teen" trope with Darcy, her unlikable behavior, and the unbalanced relationship with Art detracted from the story. The attempt to address minority issues within the queer community felt forced, and conflicts, particularly with Art's father Marcus, lacked impactful resolution. The climax unfairly portrayed Art as the bad guy, leaving the overall narrative unsatisfying. I wished the book had focused more on D&D or approached LGBTQ+ themes more thoughtfully for a more cohesive and impactful storytelling experience.

I really enjoyed reading this, I needed more wholesomeness in my reading after a couple of whammy's. I really enjoyed how the characters grew throughout the story, given that Darcy was a complete write off for me at the beginning. But that's what a good story is all about, letting the characters grow into someone your readers love :)

This was highly unexpected and wonderful. It was heartwarming, real, and just so relevant to what it's like to be in the position of these main characters. Darcy has moved to a very small town with her two moms for one of their jobs, and the difference between here and the city is stark. Art is a geeky kid, totally into Dungeons & Dragons and content with his friend group. Until he meets Darcy...

There are a lot of hard topics discussed in this book, but I feel like the author did an excellent job of addressing them in a real world situation. Abusive relationships, sexuality, safety in school, attacks and damage to property because of sexual inclination, and standing up for what's right, despite the possible and very personal barriers.

I loved this. It was sweet and romantic, creative, and really hit some bigotry head on. The dangers of not supporting students with something like a SQA or SGA, and the importance of educating allies and helping people learn about how they can become an ally.

If you're in need of resources, The Trevor project website is a great place to start.

An absolutely wonderful and clever read!

As a DnD fan myself who has played a couple of campaigns and also found myself obsessed with Baldur's Gate 3 I knew I absolutely had to read this. I think the author did a fantastic job of blending the fantasy of the game and real life together and the characters were really interesting and enjoyable. This book was easy to fall in to and get lost in and was thoroughly enjoyable!

ARC provided by Netgalley and House of Anansi Press Inc., Groundwood Books, thank you!!
Rating 4.5
I am not a big YA reader, as someone still actively trying to suppress my own high school experience more than a decade later, but as a fellow Saskatchewanian I couldn't resist giving this a shot, and I'm thrilled I did!
I'm a big ol nerd currently obsessed with Baldur's Gate 3 and this was a nice way to get more RPG in my life. I will also say that the fantasy breaking up the high school IRL life was great and made the high school stuff more effective to me. It's an important story about LGBTQIA+ acceptance that could have easily been bogged down with the minutiae of high school drama but it was more adult and with the parallels between the IRL story and the RPG story it provided a nice balance. I also liked the ending with the "Don't ask, don't tell" line because people are complex and it wouldn't have made sense for complete change of heart, even if we wish that were the case more often.

In Who We Are in Real Life by Victoria Koops we follow Darcy and Art who are nerds at heart and love to play dungeons & dragons. Darcy moves to a small town with her two moms where her mom will become the main physician. However everyone in this small town are very religious and don’t approve of the new family. So we see Darcy struggling to fit in, to find friends, and having to find the strength to stand up for what she believes in. Then we meet art who is the town local who’s knows everyone. His father is a priest so he comes from a very religious household and we see how he has a rough relationship with his dad and always having to be the one there for his sister. Darcy and art me and bond over their nerdy interests. We follow both of them having to over come a lot of personal obstacles to fight for and get what they want! I absolutely love this book! It tugged at my heart strings and made me relate to all the characters in so many different ways. This had great representation for everyone trying to figure out who they are!!

A big thanks to NetGalley and Groundwood Books for providing an eARC in exchange for an honest review.

I got Fangirls vibes, but it just wasn't all there.

Who We Are in Real Life by Victoria Koops is a YA contemporary novel about Darcy who has just moved to the small prairie town of Unity Creek with her two moms. It feels like she left everything good behind in the city. She misses her tabletop gaming friends and her boyfriend ― and is horrified by the homophobia her family faces in their new home. Then she meets kind, quiet Art, who invites her to join his Dungeons & Dragons game. Art is mostly happy fading into the background at school and only really coming alive during his friends’ weekly D&D game ― until meeting Darcy pulls his life off-course in wonderful and alarming ways. Suddenly he has something worth fighting for. But what if that something puts him in conflict with his father, an influential and conservative figure in their town? Can Art stand up against his father’s efforts to prevent Darcy and her friends from starting a queer-straight alliance at school? Meanwhile, in game, Darcy’s and Art’s D&D characters join forces to fight corruption as they grow closer in the homebrew world of Durgeon’s Keep ― as fantasy and reality collide.

This was a decent read. I think I'm getting exhausted reading so many contemporaries based on the nerd side of life. Like hello, I don't need DND to be romanticized. I just want to pummel goblins and be chaos in peace. But overall this was still a good book, but I just need some time away from contemporary reads.

After moving to a small town with her moms, Darcy feels like she’s left everything behind: her friends, D&D friends, and her (albeit, abusive) boyfriend. She meets Art, a quiet kid who invites her to join his weekly D&D game. Quickly, the two find a lot in common and begin to have feelings for each other, forcing Darcy to confront her current boyfriend’s emotional and physical abuse. When Darcy, Art, and their friends attempt to start a QSA at their high school, they face the small town’s quiet homophobia, and Art’s uber-conservative father.

Who We Are In Real Life was a pretty quick read for me, but wasn’t very memorable. It dealt with some heavier topics (homophobia and abuse) so it wasn’t a particularly fun read either. I will say that I did enjoy how the book gave a novelized version of the in-story D&D game. Everything the PCs were going through “in game” reflected the overall themes of the book. The struggles the PCs faced the characters faced in a similar-but-different capacity, and that’s honestly what kept me engaged in the “IRL” chapters of the book.

One gripe I do have is that the story felt somewhat inconclusive. Some storylines with side characters (Like James, Darcy’s ex) felt inconclusive. Even the chemistry between Art/Darcy left me not feeling much of anything. I honestly can’t remember a single conversation between Art/Darcy that was any kind of deep or meaningful. I just remember them arguing about things (what? I can’t remember), and I honestly don’t remember where they left off (emotionally) at the end of the story.