But How Are You, Really was well written and pulled me into the story from the beginning.

Everyone that graduated from school, high school or college, knows how it feels to dread any sort of reunion - to worry that you'll be the butt of the jokes about how everyone is doing since you last saw each other. To worry that you're the only one in the whole class that is doing terribly, that you're the only one that hates their job/life/etc is the worst feeling in the world and this book seemed to capture that worry perfectly. Add onto that the stress of a boss that does all he can to tear you down and you've got one heck of a stressful weekend.

For Charlotte Thorne, the stressful weekend is compounded even more by the looming threat of dealing with exes and her Slack messages flooding her notifications. Charlotte surrounds herself with her chosen family (friends that she hasn't spoken to in months because life gets busy) and does her best to enjoy the Alumni weekend at the college she graduated from only 5 years before. She falls back into her friendships easily, almost too easily, and she realizes as the weekend progresses that maybe life can be made a little better with the help of her friends.

This books feels like it's telling a story about how we as people tend to get stuck in cycles throughout our lifetime and that sometimes, the best way to move forward in your life - to be successful - is to break those cycles (or at least try).

This book was great, entertaining and heartfelt - I would have rated it 4 stars but honestly, there was some smut in the story that I didn't really feel like fit - I wouldn't have missed the smut at all if it had been fade-to-black as opposed to shown. It's a solid, and quick, read that I can see myself re-reading when I want to read a book that has characters that I genuinely enjoy.

(3.5 rounded up)

There was SO much authenticity and realness here. Grappling with who you are in your early career-stage is hard and tumultuous and terrifying.

I resonated with Charlotte on so many levels, and thought the representation of how trauma responses feel from the inside was very on the nose.

I didn’t, however, resonate with this college experience so I felt some disconnect there. This was over all enjoyable, but at times I just felt it was all a little self indulgent? But again- this academic experience was quite far from mine, so I know the tone was partially reliant on that.

Wow I loved this book! Great character development and writing. So glad I got to read this book and definitely recommend it!

Thank you NetGalley and Ella Dawson!

this is a sweet, deeply feeling story. I felt the nuanced emotions connected to a life that feels stalled out, and the memory of one that held its own joys & sorrows.

the representation of people and community in this book was deeply beautiful, joyful, and complex. there were so many valid & validating emotions to feel when reading this story, all while also being a cute & fun romance.

overall, this was a unique & emotional story that I truly enjoyed.

thank you for the arc :)

But How Are You, Really was a stunning debut novel for a couple of reasons but largely for its perfect consistency.

Throughout the novel, we follow Charlotte Thorne–a bisexual twenty-something with an underwhelming life consumed by her utter lack of work-life balance and unresolved trauma. So to start, it’s relatable.

Charlotte is thrust back into the world where she had her greatest self-discovery followed by her worst identity crisis–her college years (again, relatable to a fault). The novel is chock-full of perfect little pieces that speak to a wide range of experiences within adulthood. Ella Dawson does a phenomenal job of exploring the intersections of trauma as it relates to childhood trauma, domestic abuse, workplace exploitation, and resulting hyper-independence. She executes these intersections in consistent increments so that readers can naturally follow and understand the thought process of our protagonist.

Now, this is not just about the doom and gloom of adulthood and trauma. There is so much love in the romantic and platonic sense here. There is found family and there is the rekindling of old flames. There is (good) sex and there is understanding and there is healing. All of these aspects were interwoven beautifully into the plot and kept perfectly consistent.

Ultra special shout out to Dawson’s purposeful use of the color wheel motif. Such a slay. As always, I will be purchasing the physical edition once it’s released on June 4, 2024.

Thank you, NetGalley for the Advanced Reader Copy!

This book was a nice surprise. What caught my attention first was the cover, I think it’s really unique and pretty. Of course I was intrigued by the blurb and was really excited to start it. Overall it was cute cozy book with a good main character. I liked the found family aspect and the queer representation which was well done.

A very relatable book for millennials. This is a book where you are able to genuinely empathize with the characters as though they are real people- probably because any millennial who has experienced the post-college grind can recognize what they are going through. Very well-written and engaging, with a satisfying conclusion and lots of good representation of the queer community.

i really enjoyed this book. i found the main character to be extremely relatable and i love seeing this kind of representation in books! i will say though, i thought the beginning was kind of slow so it’s definitely not for everyone.

thank you netgalley for the e arc!

I liked this, slowly, as I grew into it. I'm clearly not the target demographic, so it was a little outside of my college experience almost half a century ago. I certainly could identify with the longing to be part of a community, to be cherished, to be understood, and to be loved. The characters were realistic, a little whiny, but I could picture them. I enjoyed my time that I spent with them, something I don't say after a book very often.

For a first novel, I'm pretty impressed.

I received a complimentary copy of the novel from the publisher and NetGalley, and my review is being left freely.

This book resonates with the human with a beautiful soul who has walls built up super high.

Charlotte (Charlie) had a plan for her life, and just like most who leave college filled with excitement and passion for their dreams, it didn’t go as planned. In the five years since leaving her alma mater, she has since not shown as much success as her old friends and colleagues. Everyone around her has their life together and she is just surviving. She rekindles friendships and relationships but also faces some spicy dejavu, or otherwise known as ptsd. She learns about herself in the process along with knowing her self worth.

I wanted to love this book so much. I resonated so much with Charlotte and leaving college with such a positive outlook on the future. But it took until halfway through the book for me to fully be invested. I found the character to be very similar to the character Sadness in the Pixar movie “Inside Out”. Once we got to really understanding her, along with her forever Crush Reece, plus watching the pain her best friends really had watching her go through all of these emotions, I really loved the book. She overcame so many obstacles and chose herself and her life.

I loved each of the characters, their diversity along with the realistic portrayal of their college. I do wish that we could have seen more POV from her college friends; but maybe that’s an excellent storyline for a second or third book.

This book is great for someone who is trying to find their way. It provides hope, and reality.

I have very conflicted feelings about this book. There were times where I was eating it up but then there were other times that I was almost falling asleep. I think a lot of that comes from the chapters being so unbearably long. I truly think that if the chapters were shorter, I would have ate this book up. But because that is not the case, I don't really love it.

This story felt powerful in its ability to make the readers think. It was very powerful in that sense. Also, I loved how delicately and authentically author handled severe topics. I would highly be recommending it.

All I can say is WOW! My only complaint is that the book wasn't longer, I need more!!! I cannot wait to share this book with my patrons.

This was a great book! I really enjoyed it and highly recommend it! This story had wonderful characters and character development. I loved the interaction between them too! What a wonderful story!

Charlotte Thorne is attending her five-year college reunion with an overwhelming feeling of dread. She’ll reunite with exes, college friends she’s not been great at keeping in touch with, have to deal with her PITA boss, and be forced to confront, and reckon with, her traumatic life experiences.

What I wish I knew before reading: 1)This is heavy, reminiscent of Sally Rooney novels, and with that you get an empathetic cast of characters who are dealing with complex life issues. You also encounter despicable, smarmy people 2)Reece is a guy and an absolute sweetheart. He’ll make up for the smarm.

While not a fast read for me, But How Are You, Really is a solid representation of how hard those first few years after college can be. I adored Charlotte’s friend group and the Acronym community and would’ve loved more time with them, along with Reece.

Thank you to NetGalley, Dutton, and Ella for the opportunity to read this in advance of its ~June 2024 release.

Second chance romance, college reunion, not being where you wanted to be in your late 20s.
I liked a lot about this book, the plot, the characters, the politics, but there were times I was so thrown out of the story by phrases that I felt were cringey or didn’t fit within the tone. “Strong nostalgia vibes” about a vending machine, took me a while to pick the book back up after that.
After getting over the initial first third of the book or so I started to enjoy it a lot more! I do think I would read another book by this author, but go into it expecting some of the parts of contemporary romance that don’t tend to work for me.

*i received this book as an ARC in exchange for an honest review*

3 .5 ⭐️!! i really did enjoy this book! it was a quick, fun read. and this is my first book of this genre actually!

i didn’t expect this book to be so heavy. i enjoyed watching charlotte’s character development, it was phenomenal! i genuinely felt proud of her by the end of the book. i really do wish this book was written in multiple pov’s though. i think that could have potentially changed my rating, as having multiple point of views would have given more context to the story. the found family in this book was again- an amazing aspect added. you’d want all these people in your corner.

overall, a decent read!

A lovely tribute to found family and second chances.

Charlotte isn’t where she thought she would be five years after graduating from university. Sure she keeps telling her friends she is fine but the more she thinks about it, the more she realizes some changes might be in order. What better place to re-examine your choices than a five-year reunion?!

I really enjoyed this - Charlotte is easy to root for and her conversations and connection with Reece were so compelling.

Thank you very much to Penguin Dutton and NetGalley for the opportunity to read a copy.

This book was about a girl, Charlotte, who attends her college reunion (to work) and how she finds a way to grow when faced with the past. I loved the LGBTQ+ representation in this novel and how the 3D's (Dead, Divorced, and otherwise Disappointing parents) find a family within their friend group. The romance wasn't too heavy or all-consuming but seemed well written. Ella Dawson did a great job of incorporating a lot of different themes into the story without making it seem too contrived. I thought referencing the emotional color wheel was a great recurring pattern that helped the reader understand Charlotte's internal conflicts and struggle with verbalizing her emotions. The story was a bit slow for me at the beginning, but the depth of characterization was amazing and made this a highly enjoyable read.

Thank you to NetGalley, the author, and the publisher for access to this ARC in exchange for an honest review!

Easy book to get into. Fun characters. A college reunion. Drama! I loved this new title from Dawson. Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC.