I loved this book when it first came out and I still love it today. Laurie and Toby are a sweet, hot, emotional mess of a couple. The annotations were a hoot to read - it's so interesting to get a glimpse into the mind of Alexis Hall. Thank you to netgalley for the ARC. Opinions are my own.

What a beautiful problem to have. To love a book so immediately and so thoroughly that writing a review feels so impossible.

For context, I am most certainly biased when it comes to Alexis Hall's writing. His voice works for me, even on the rare occasion when the content doesn't.

I put off reading For Real in part because my pattern-finding brain starts to experience diminishing returns if I read too much by the same author too quickly, and partly because I was worried it would not live up to the hype. So I went in with a combination of high and managed expectations.

Because of my weird completionist brain, I actually read the original publication in May with a plan to re-read the new edition. And wow, it really worked for me from the get-go. The whole time I was reading this book the first time, I was thinking that I already couldn't wait to come back to it again because I could see how rich it was and how I could get more out of it on re-read.

Now I have just completed that re-read with the new edition, including the bonus materials, and I am still blown away - maybe more so - by how much I love this book. Yes, this book uses kink as a central device around how the two love interests connect but (and no shade to kink when I say this - I'm just mindful that this will make the book unappealing for some readers), a smart friend pointed out that the kink is not even the point. It's the tool AJH uses to demonstrate that pleasure and emotional connection come more reliably with genuine vulnerability. And I believe that applies regardless of the type of intimacy. And really, this book so beautifully demonstrates that.

It also feels so much like a Spires book - with Laurie as a typical Spires protagonist, with the bonus (rare from AJH, but totally necessary) dual POV from Toby. It was also satisfying to find lots of AJH micro-tropes/micro-core stories, including lots of parallels with Ardy (I think I'm due for an Ardy re-read.)

I see I have talked about this book for paragraphs and hardly said anything about the book at all but that's where I'm at: in a haze of inarticulate love for a book that makes me feel and think and challenges me.

Ultimately, this is one of the most beautiful books I've ever read and it more than lived up to the hype for me after all.

I generally love Alexis Hall books. I love the character development and the surly nature of many of the characters. I love the spiciness too and even when there is a bit of flirting with domination. But, this book was too much for me. Now, if you are super into BDSM and you like a bit of pain in your sex scenes you will probably love this book. I just couldn't like it anymore when one of the characters was screaming in pain from some foreplay bondage. Also, I just couldn't with the age gap. It was too much. That doesn't mean I won't be reading other less BDSM focused Alexis Hall books without such a drastic age gap because A.H. is a really good writer.

One of Alexis Hall’s best IMO. I love the dynamic of the main characters, how vulnerable they are, how soft they are in the middle with their hard exteriors.

Beautifully written.

An age gap BDSM erotic romance where both the age gap and BDSM are examined on screen and not fueled for fetish material in and of themselves, but are an element of the characters that they need to acknowledge and address and grow around. I appreciated very much how both intersected with the character's gay culture, as well. As an erotic romance there is a LOT of sex, which is great but you should def know about it going in. Another reviewer described this as a book in conversation with so many romantic conventions and I totally agree with that! As always with Hall, the writing was gorgeous and you can expect to have your heart ripped out and put back in several many times! I felt like it fully achieved the things it set out to do.

It's very refreshing to me to find a BDSM story that's not just fetish or just all about kink (no shade intended) or *shudders* just really badly researched, but offers an actual exploration/discussion about power dynamics and growth? (Especially if you read the author's annotations, which offer even more of that.) Which probably shows to those into the genre how seldomly I go there. But I do love Alexis Hall, so I thought, eh. What could possibly go wrong? Spoiler alert: feelings. As always, it gave me feelings *gag*. It made me all sad and then ridiculously happy for Laurie and Toby and gaaaaaah. Ugh.

And even worse, I'm glad I just trusted the evil genius and went with it, because frankly, I didn't expect to like this book as much as I did. But those two make sense as individuals and as a couple and just. Work. And that's pretty much all I want from any book. People I love spending time with. (And make me want to re-read Mary Renault's "The Charioteer". Because apparently, I enjoy suffering with my emotionally stunted idiots and watching them work their shit out.)

When I first requested this I was unaware that it’s the third installment of a series. I don’t think it’s necessary to read the others before reading this one. The story seemed to be interconnected standalone or loosely tied somehow. I thought this was romantic and gorgeous.

Alexis Hall thinks he will never be asked to annotate his own work again, but I hope he is wrong. I appreciated all of the extra insight into his process nearly a decade on in this rerelease title. I don't know much about the scene described in this story, but it's got a big, beating heart typical of all of Hall's work.

I was a bit weary going into this particular book due to the age gap between the MCs. I'm all for bodily autonomy and a person's right to make their own decisions, but with the younger of the two being only 19 I was just really uncomfortable, honestly. That's only 3 years from 16 which just feels..weird. However, I think the age gap is addressed in a direct and realistic way, and also a central part of the older characters internal struggles which I appreciated.

I've read the other books in this series and they have all been pretty spicy, too, but something about the amount of those scenes in this book I found off putting. While I understand that a lot of the characters emotional connections and developments happen during these scenes, I found myself getting frustrated and flipping through pages to get to the plot. This one felt like mainly smut with a small sprinkle of story- which is fine if that's what you're looking for, but I'd really have liked more story outside of the bedroom scenes.

That being said, the scenes we did get outside of that, were great. Especially the last third or so of the book. When things got very real and raw and emotional. I thought it was beautiful and would just really have liked to see more of that.

I do genuinely love Alexis Hall's books, I think this one was just a miss for me.

For Real was such an emotional ride and really pushed the reader to consider sexual stereotypes, especially in gay relationships. Laurie and Toby tugged on all the heartstrings all they grew together. This was also a thoughtful, realistic, but also sexy, viewing into what a BDSM relationship can look like (unlike some of the other mainstream books out there) and recognizes that those preferences and personal to the individual and the couple.

Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for this digital arc in exchange for my honest review.

Oof this was so out of my comfort zone. Huge age gap and bdsm. It was so hot. Oof!

For Real by Alexis Hall sits very deeply in the "Not For Me, Personally" pile.

To keep it as straightforward as possible: I adore Alexis Hall's stream-of-conscious writing style so much so that it's truly what draws me into the characters in the first place. I come out of their books feeling like I made a handful of new friends along the way and there is something beyond special about that.

For Real lost me for two reasons. The age gap, age-gapped too close to the sun for me. 18 years apart might be fine if the youngest was in their early to mid-twenties, but nineteen. Well. Too close to the sun. On top of this, Alexis's writing style draws a reader into the character, making it all the more real just how young our MC was. The less prevalent reason is the quickness of an established relationship/feelings between the MCs (I love yearning, I must yearn).

The writing was phenomenal, but alas, not for me.

Thank you, NetGalley and Sourcebooks Casablanca!

Heat Factor: Exceptionally explicit

Character Chemistry: They have exquisite sexual chemistry…but the rest needs to be worked out

Plot: We’re having sex. Are we boyfriends? What about now?

Overall: This is a book in conversation with so many romance conventions

To start, I want to make something clear: I’m pretty sure that Alexis Hall is a genius. This book is very deliberate in what it’s doing: the scenes build on each other, each line of dialogue has purpose, and everything is very crisp and sparkling. I loved the intertextuality, both in terms of the myriad references to poetry and art and the ways the book engages with romance tropes.

On the other hand, this is not a subtle book. (In fact, in this rerelease, Hall includes annotations—delightful!—and states outright that he never claimed to be a subtle author.) So if you don’t want several variations on the theme of what makes a relationship “for real,” then this is not the book for you.

Here’s the deal. Laurie is old1 and jaded and still kind of hung up on his ex. Well, not exactly on his ex, but on what he and his ex had together—sexuality compatibility AND love AND a life together. But when the book opens, what Laurie is actively hung up on is missing having a BDSM partner without all the negotiations. Which makes it hard to find a Dom in the sex club scene.2

Enter Toby, 19 years old. He’s young and inexperienced but he knows that he’s a Dom…and Laurie recognizes the spark in him. Sex ensues. Lots and lots of extremely explicit sex, including dominance play and toys. Such as an anal hook (which is exactly what you are imagining) and a lemon meringue pie (literally a pie, that’s not code for something). Why yes, that scene will be seared in my mind forever. The point is, readers: this is Hall’s most explicit book, so please be prepared when I say that he is NOT messing around here.

What also ensues is Laurie being awful and constantly pushing Toby away, but also wanting (slash expecting) Toby to come back. Which Toby does, because the sex is just that good. And because Toby likes Laurie, and is willing to admit it, because he is young and brave and full of life. An incredible amount of tension builds, as Toby and Laurie enter different spaces together. Each chapter, I was like, “OMG, are they going to have the huge fight now? What about now?” (The way I was sweating bullets when they went to the fancy party at Oxford together!) (And the way I GASPED when Toby confessed his love and Laurie SHUSHED HIM.) Interestingly, this book is written in dual POV3 (it might be the only of Hall’s books not written from a single perspective), and seeing both perspectives just ratchets up the tension more. And, because this book is Long As Hell, it just kept building and building until the snap happened.

Now, this book does include a third-act breakup and a runaway, but, because Hall is playing with tropes here, we have a runaway combined with a one-sided courtship—where the courter is the one who runs. When Toby leaves, Laurie is forced to face his behavior partially because he literally has no way of contacting Toby. Toby has been at his house every weekend for sex for months, and they have not exchanged phone numbers.

I really enjoyed reading this book and found it to be a rich reading experience. However, I will say that I was so invested in analyzing what was going on (and how Hall was participating in Romance Conversations in interesting ways) that I didn’t find myself being swept away as much as I might have otherwise.

1He’s not actually old. He’s 37. In his annotations, Hall noted that when he wrote this book, he imagined 37 as ancient, but now… ↩︎
2When Erin, Ingrid, and I had a discussion about consent in romance, we talked about trends in BDSM romance, with the two extremes of pure fantasy kink and consent primers. This book takes place very clearly in the world of consent primer, but also very explicitly is not one. ↩︎
3File under Hall’s genius: the two voices are very distinct, such that it was always very obvious whose head we were in—including the two voices being written in different tenses. (Laurie is in first person past, Toby is in first person present.) ↩︎

I voluntarily read and reviewed a complimentary copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own. We disclose this in accordance with 16 CFR §255.

This review is also available at The Smut Report.

So, let's just be in love today."

I'll be honest, I struggled with this read and it's no one's fault but my own. Normally I thoroughly research possible triggers and content warnings. I completely missed how integral the BDSM would be a part of Laurie and Toby's journey. I found myself skipping pages which really did not allow Hall's story to be fully appreciated.Hall turns the usual who is the Dom and who is the Sub on it's head, who is experienced, who needs to learn. But their total journey is worth the skipped pages. They find themselves anew.

A wonderful work with the potential to make you giggle, laugh and kick your feet in pleasure, sometimes in the most ill advised of settings.

DNF at 25% because the characters are fully together and in a relationship so ... what more is there to read? I got to a chapter that was just a running train of thought of a 19 year old and I don't mean to be rude but no thank you.

Also the age gap between a 19 and a 37 year old begs the question: in the time between when they're not boning, what on earth do they even talk about?

This an an AJH title that I originally read years ago and loved. This time around, as a re-read, I loved it just as much! Toby and Laurie are a wonderful pair who find each other at the right time. I usually go out of my way to avoid reading any age gap romances, but this one is handled so well that I will seek out a reread again in the future. Probably soon!

I love Alexis Hall’s writing. His writing style and sense of humor immediately pull me into the story each and every time I pick up one of his works.

If you’re familiar with the other Spires stories already, you know that the content tends to be heavier and the physical intimacy displayed on page is much greater than some of Hall’s other contemporary works, like the Winner Takes All and London Calling series.

For Real, in particular, takes that door—which sometimes gets closed during romance—and blows it off its hinges. It depicts a MM dom-sub relationship with an age gap.

Laurie is a trauma doctor with an established career and established proclivities. He knows what he likes and he’s open to physical intimacy but is closed off to anything else. Compared to Laurie, it feels like Toby is barely out of high school. He may not have as much experience in the Scene, but he knows what he wants. With Laurie, things just click.

I’ll admit that, given the ages of these characters, I had my initial misgivings about this relationship, but as the book went on, I learned that, although Toby is young age-wise, in many ways he’s been the adult in his household for years. I ended up rooting for the couple.

Since this relationship is initially driven by physical intimacy, much of the book is spent depicting physical acts, but, as Hall is apt to do, that honesty and vulnerability portrayed physically turns into emotional vulnerability as well.

This one may not be a hit for all Alexis Hall fans, but it will definitely pull on the heartstrings of those willing to leap into the Scene.

This rereleased version from Sourcebooks Casablanca includes annotations from the author as well as Toby’s lemon meringue pie recipe.

4.75⭐️

I received an advance copy of the book from Sourcebooks Casablanca. All review opinions are my own.

3.5 stars. As someone who really enjoys Alexis Hall's writing, I am surprised I haven't read For Real before its republication. This book really drew me in from the beginning, and I love the reliable wit that infuses Hall's writing. I liked the May-December romance between Laurie and Toby and the way in which this dealt with kink in a frank and affectionate manner. I did find my interest waning, however, around the midway point, as much of the internal dialogue of both main characters became a bit repetitive and the upcoming conflict has literally been telegraphed from the beginning. I know this is a much-beloved book by many, and so this is very much a me issue.

I do think that the new cover art and simplified book synopsis will be a bit misleading for potential readers who might pick this up at a bookstore wanting something like Boyfriend Material, which this very much is not. Who knows, maybe this will be an unexpected delight, and if not at least they get a recipe for lemon meringue pie out of it.

This was brilliant. Hall’s writing is moving and true, Toby and Laurie are flawed characters that feel real, relatable and endearing.
This kinky book was also hot without ever losing its tenderness, which I absolutely loved. It was so refreshing to read such an atypical story about bdsm, away from the harsh tropes sometimes found in the genre. If I was worried about the age gap at first, which is a trope I’m getting tired of reading about, the relationship between them and the way they navigate their differences swept it away quickly.
I can’t recommend it enough.