I loved What It’s Like in Words. This was one of a few books I’ve read this year with unrequited love at the center, and Eliza Moss just nails that specific kind of heartbreak. The story follows Enola, an aspiring writer who gets wrapped up in a messy, one-sided relationship with a guy from her writing group. It’s one of those toxic, confusing situations where you keep hoping things will change even when you know deep down they won’t. The writing is sharp and raw, and I really felt Enola’s inner spiral as she tries to make sense of it all. Moss plays with memory and perspective in a really cool way that makes the story feel even more personal. I couldn’t stop thinking about it after I finished. Can’t wait to see what she does next.

A very moving but also very enraging book. Made me feel very reflective of my own experiences as a writer and as a young woman. Very effective in its message.

This was shockingly relatable; I think anyone who has survived a narcassistic relationship will agree that Moss is spot-on. The frenzied highs and the dismal lows; the annoyance I felt with Enola was the same I felt with myself at times of lucidity in my toxic relationship. A hard one to swallow, but also very moving.

Offers a compelling and thought-provoking narrative that delves into the complexities of love, trauma, and personal growth.

This book really grew on me the more I read it! What It's Like in Words tells the story of a dysfunctional relationship between a young woman and an unnamed man who is an abusive narcissist. The writing style is fresh and honest., and depicts how and why people can sometimes be drawn in by these types of relationships. The nature of the book makes it uncomfortable to read, but it is well done.

This was such a tough read. The author perfectly executed what it's like being in an abusive relationship. This book is raw and real. It definitely put me in my feels.

my heart always hurts for characters like this. you never know who you are until someone hurts you enough to find out.

Thank you to Net Galley, the author, and the publisher for an ARC in exchange for an honest review!

Unfortunately, this book didn't resonate with me. I couldn't get into the narration style. It jumped around a bit too much for my liking and felt scattered. While I can see why some might appreciate the emotional heaviness, I had trouble connecting with the characters enough to feel the full weight of it.

what a thrilling debut! thank you to the publisher for the e-arc (so sorry it’s late); all opinions are my own.

i love reading debut authors; it always kind of reminds me of spring flowers coming out after a long rainstorm. i think this book is no exception. moss comes out swinging with the first chapter and it surely is a ride from start to finish. i found myself captivated by enola, but i would also be lying if i said some of her actions didn’t make me want to scream. she was deeply flawed and incredibly complex, some may even call her “messy.” but saying all that, she was a great protagonist. i loved seeing her growth from chapter one to the end of the book and her growth was clear, even if there were some speed bumps in the road.

i definitely do think that this is a character driven novel. it’s very lit fic, if i had to put it in a category. saying that, there were some things that didn’t quite work for me, hence the three stars. i still enjoyed it, but not without its flaws.

i feel like with such a cast of supporting characters, there wasn’t a lot of depth to many of them, with the exception of Ruth. i think they were there for the sake of being there? it’s a bit like having a party, but not knowing anyone there, even though you see them often. it was surface level, i think. i got the feeling that maybe this book was about friendship and finding yourself, but i wonder how things would have played out if she focused on making better connections with Ruth’s friends or even her literary critique group instead of going back to that horrendous guy.

speaking of that horrendous guy (i don’t even know his name and i think it was mentioned once in the beginning?), he was awful, which made me feel bad for enola. she deserved better. but i can’t say that i wouldn’t do the same. having the rose tinted glasses on as you try to navigate a new relationship when it’s more than you signed up for. she tried her best to become Cool Girl, as the synopsis puts it, but this relationship unearths some uncomfortable truths for enola.

i think another thing that i wished was explored more was her dad and their relationship. i think just one conversation with her mom and everything seemed finished with that plot line. the dad really was a ghost haunting the narrative, but with a little seance, he was gone. i wanted more from that, but instead it was the other guy we were looking at.

it wasn’t a bad book at all. moss had sharp writing skills and she perfectly captured the high of being in love and forever chasing the high. it did remind me a little bit of the show “I Will Destroy You” though i can’t quite put my finger on it. i still enjoyed myself, i just wish certain things were explored a little more deeply.

Thank you Enola, bc girl I was in a SLUMP but your relationship with ~him~ had me way too engaged (and stressed) to stop reading.

This debut novel by Eliza Moss was an incredible depiction of just how obsessive a person could be about the wrong relationship, and how such obsession can drive someone to forget themselves and base their sole desires on the other person- who does NOT deserve it. It was written in such a way that you were in sync with Enola’s thoughts and feelings, that when he was gaslighting Enola, or manipulating her, or calling her sensitive or crazy, you felt it so intensely. Her thought spirals and anxiety were so potently written that I felt each one, and I spiraled with her. He was so unbelievably rude at times to her, and I felt it in my gut. Each time he alluded to the fact that Ruth was more beautiful, or Steph understood him more, or was Enola beach ready? My heart HURT. It was devasting to watch her grow more and more insecure, and see that insecurity lead her to spirals (and quite frankly crash outs). I really loved Enola. I was rooting for her every step of the way.

“I didn’t think about my pleasure, because it wasn’t my pleasure I was addicted to.”

“I would have cut my own arm, it meant he could heal my wound.”

“I had never felt sexy before, but I believed him, because at this point, I was what he told me.”

I have to say, the friendship between Ruth and Enola. I absolutely loved it. Ruth was such an amazing friend to Enola, even through her spirals and crash outs. We would all be so lucky to have a forever friend like Ruth.

“Enola, she said, he breaks you, and I’m worried that I won’t be able to put you back together again.”

Writing wise- I was immediately taken back by the lack of quotation marks. But I did eventually get used to it (a seasoned Normal People lover). Also- I think not having Enola name ~him~ was such a cool and different artistic choice, and I think it gave so much weight to the fact that he was an all encompassing being in her mind. He had so much power. He was the only him. It was just very interesting, and powerful, to read. And I truly enjoyed it.

Thank you to Netgalley, Eliza Moss, and the publishers for a copy of the e-book for an honest review!🤍 I’ll definitely be on the look out for her next book.

We either are an Enola, used to be one, or know one.
There’s no in between. If you’re into toxic love & want to yell at a MFC for wtf she is doing & allowing, this is your book. Lmao. There’s childhood trauma, family drama, and a toxic man-boy to hate.

This was a quick read for me bc I had to know what is going to happen next. I honestly enjoyed the author’s writing & the synopsis up until the last chapter. It fell off for me then. Maybe I don’t get it, but it would have been a 4star read for me if it wasn’t for that.

Ps, Enola DID NOT DESERVE RUTH!

Thank you NetGalley, the publishers & author for this ARC!

I can’t remember the last time I got so worked up about any man, fictional or otherwise, but my god did this man make me want to throttle something. I understand that part of the value of the narrative was to make the reader sit in the same vicious cycle the FMC was subject to, but it was truly infuriating throwing red flag after red flag only for them to fall on deaf ears. That being said, I think this story could be triggering for people who have experienced toxic relationships, or a necessary wake up call for anyone still in one. I’m also relieved that there was a pretty tidy conclusion to the book after being jerked back and forth for hundreds of pages, but the fiction became apparent in some of the timing of the tidy little ending.

Other titles that caused me a similar balance of devastation and exasperation: Acts of Desparation, In the Dream House (memoir).

Thank you to Henry Holt & Co. for the opportunity to read and review!

frustrating flawed main characters whois deeply relatable and arrogant self absorbed love interest. situationships are like a car crash you can't look away from.

thanks netgalley and author eliza moss for allowing me to read.

This book was two fold for me. On one hand as I was reading it I really really disliked the main character Enola. She was annoying and didn't listen to anything any of her female friends said but constantly chose a man over herself and geez, get over him already! On the other hand, the ending was quite nice and what I hoped would happen, although it took the ENTIRE book for her to get there. I think the overall message of this one is pretty important and it becomes clearer and clearer as you read this one and watch Enola fall in love with a terrible man who manipulates, abuses, and gaslights her the entire time while also dealing with familial relationship issues and ultimately a huge daddy problem. It's a sad story to read but I'm sure this happens all the time to women.

What the writer does well in this one is make you, the reader, feel a bit off with Enola. At points I began to question what was happening and what the real story was. I was a bit gaslit by the story itself but eventually everything is untangled and you get an ending that is satisfactory.

2.5-3 stars
This was an interesting story and at times I would get annoyed with the main character and her devotion to a man who really did not seem to care about her or her feelings. As the story progressed she has one friend who is a true constant in supporting her throughout this dynamic.

Enola is an aspiring writer, waving goodbye to the end of her twenties from her position as a barista at a hedge fund cafe and regularly showing up to her writing group without anything actually written, when she meets Him. He, though nameless, quickly becomes the central figure of Enola's every thought, nearly swallowing her whole, though her all-consuming love allows her to hand-wave off the red flags that turn into red billboards. Moss's prose is wonderful, and the speed and deftness with which she is able to conjure up a fully realized character is remarkable. The story kept me on my toes, as well—I tore through most of this book in a day. While the main relationship explored is that between Enola and Mr. Wrong, we also take a deep dive into the other core relationships in her life (namely, that with her best friend and her mother). This book broke my heart before firmly stitching it back together. While it was difficult to watch Enola go through some of the mistreatment time and time again, ultimately the catharsis provided at the end made the whole thing more than worth it.

Another worthy addition to the Sweetbitter-Fleabag-PerfumeAndPain-etc-verse, WHAT IT'S LIKE IN WORDS is a gorgeously written exploration of trauma, feminism, and the many nuances of unhealthy relationships.

Echoing what I've seen in a few other reviews of this: it reminded me of Adelaide by Genevieve Wheeler (a high compliment)! This was everything I was hoping for based on the description. Similar to Adelaide, it felt like someone peered inside my brain and laid out my deepest thoughts and emotions on paper. The author clearly incorporated some of her personal experience into the story, as the descriptions of a first love were too accurate to be fiction. I also love the title - a clever play on the plot (what it's like to fall in love for the first time, but also the uncertainty of it and the emotion of it all).

This was an interesting take on looking back at a failed relationship. I was hooked from the start to see how it would all unravel.

What It’s Like in Words is a novel that evoked an enormous amount of emotion from me. I felt so much rage for the main male character, while also feeling compassion for Enola and a deep understanding for her best friend. The toxicity and manipulation was well characterized, and the storyline felt genuine and believable. This is one of my favorite books I’ve read in awhile.

I would like to thank NetGalley and Henry Holt & Co for providing me with an advance e-galley of this book in exchange for an honest review. Look for it now in your local and online bookstores and libraries.