“As with all fantasies and kinks, if it is one you personally do not respond to, it is so easy to find it repellent. This is where prejudice comes from. Even if you are not interested in or curious about a particular kink, tolerance and acceptance is surely the answer.”
My rating reflects my personal reading experience. However, if we were to judge the memoir based on its unflinching honesty describing one white Londoner woman’s experiences in the BDSM world, this deserves 5 stars.
This book is a collection of “Sonnet’s” (pseudonym) experiences being a submissive and eventual masochist – the latter of which she views as an ultimate form of submission. The excursions are strung together by loose chronological narrative, with reflections on the world of kink and its foil to modern society and non-kink sex attitudes.
Sonnet really does it all when it comes to being a sub, so her experiences can give insight to anyone interested in exploring kink. The book got a bit repetitive around 65%, and I likely would have DNFed if not for needing to review for netgalley. After 70%, I was shocked at how much the BDSM events ramped up from power exchange to extreme humiliation. As much as I agree with sentiment about not being repelled about other’s tastes, I couldn’t help but be repulsed in some activities Sonnet engages in. Those feelings negatively impacted my personal experience of reading this memoir, but my tolerance could just be much lighter than another reader’s, who would enjoy the really ‘out there’ scenes. That being said, a book describing these exact same experiences couldn’t have been executed much better, so the writer’s flowers are definitely due.

Thank you to Hachette Book Group, Grand Central and NetGalley for this Advance reader copy of this book. All my opinions are my own.

This is a book about exploration. What you think you may not like or what you think you can or cannot handle, it's all about your comfort zone. Too often we are told what to be and too often we spend our lives living how someone wants to live so we can appease them. What if you do what you wanted, be damned the consequences and live your true life? To be like you, Sonnet.

#Hachettebookgroup #Grandcentral #netgalley #arc

I think this was a wonderfully different take on a memoir. Everything about it was full of truth in the most raw and vulnerable way possible. The writing could be a bit dense at times, but not overbearingly so. I think it’s a great read for anyone that has interest in the kink scene.

Submit was a bold (somewhat wild) and interesting memoir of a submissive. It takes a dive into the headspace and gives a decent introduction.

Not my usual genre but I loved reading this book. The author talks about her experiences exploring her kinks and her relationship with her partner. You get to read about so many fun times in her life and it’s so raw and honest.

One of the most bizarre memoirs I have ever read, but so interesting! Sonnet is not afraid to give all of the details and I lived for it.

How can a book about such an interesting topic be sooOOOOoo boring??? It feels fragmented, and it’s really hard to feel any level of flow with the book.

Thank you to Grand Central Publishing and NetGalley for the eARC.

I was surprised by the candor in this book. Sonnet was forthcoming, vulnerable, and honest in her account of her exploration into the work of kink. Her work of sexual self discovery covers many topics from the world of the underground, to exploring sexual boundaries, and new introductions to her fantasies.

One of the most intriguing aspects of the book was the clinical nature of her description of her sexual experiences. This isn't innuendo laden accounts that read like a spicy booktok novel. This is a much more practical retelling of these sexual experiences and the authors thoughts and feelings. In that way the memoir didn't seem to go anywhere specific in this account as the story told was very specialized to her sexual experiences and exploration of BDSM and submission among other things.

I found the journey to be very limited in scope thought that could be wholly the fullness of the authors experience.

I would recommend this book to newly experienced people exploring the kink world rather than newbies wanting to learn more about it.

All opinions are my own.

I’ll say, I went into this book with an open mind but there were some parts that completely turned me off and made me want to discontinue the read. Why did the writer feel as if it were ok to have the FMC engage in reading literature around slavery while having sex with a black man and then the use of the n-word? I understand creative freedom but it can be done while keeping ALL readers in mind. Maybe this book would have resonated with me more if I weren’t black.

This book was really hit and miss for me. Parts of it were super interesting and incredibly sexy, with wild stories of parties and BDSM clubs and the kink scene. Other parts were repetitive and boring, like the scenes with the photographer guy with the canes kinda repeating himself. And still others were very bad examples of how to do kink. DO NOT involve strangers in your kink. Don’t be naked and tied up during people’s morning commutes in NYC. That’s the opposite of consent. That’s not cool at all.

Glad I read it, even the parts that upset or bored me. Good work, and thanks netgalley for the copy

New interest in BDSM, this book blew my mind. Reading about Sonnet's journey into this lifestyle and the liberation she found along the way. I loved that the book is broken up until three sections mind, body, and soul. It's like your In Sonnet's private diary. There are parts that inspired and intrigued me, the most journey of self discovery, getting to see the confidence growth in her. This book is a bit inspiring, uncomfortable at times, causes curiosity and self-reflection. This definitely was a good read!

Thank you to NetGalley for the eARC copy of the book.

This was such an empowering memoir. I felt that the writing was really well done and it felt like it was a casual conversation with the author. I enjoyed this read from Sonnet's perspective on this topic.

Sexual power. A woman that liberated, yet loves humiliation. The way this book conjures honesty and the question of...what the hell am I doing with my sex life? If you like books with raw, unfiltered, explicit sexual liberation, then this is your book! Not for the faint of heart or a oppressed/repressed sexual identity. Some of the scenes I had trouble getting through.

Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC!

Started out okay. Got a little repetitive. And I was not a huge fan on some of the consent issues, such as him making her get the sushi naked and with presumably marks on her body -even if she consented to this the food delivery man did not- and she seems to glaze over safe words way too quickly, wich should be a pretty big part of any BDSM play.

Thank you to Netgalley for the ARC.


Interesting writing style and topic. Told in three parts, Mind, Body, and Soul. Would definitely read another from the Pseudonymous Sonnet.

The author’s raw honesty in this memoir was truly refreshing. It was a thought-provoking read that kept me on the edge of my seat throughout the tense pages. While some parts felt a bit disjointed, the overall story was captivating and fast-paced.

To quote Anastasia Steele, “Oh my,” this book is naughty. And yet, the 50 Shades of Grey universe in which Anastasia inhabits has nothing on Sonnet’s Submit, an unflinching, eye-opening anonymously-written memoir about a woman in love with both sex and being a submissive.

The stories here are true. The sex is real and raw. It is candid and graphic, and gives you everything you never knew you wanted to know about the BDSM community and those who treat sex as “play.” This book pushes erotica to its limits, and will most certainly make you blush. It is a shamelessly written account of one woman’s obsession with sex and everything it has to offer.

If you have ever been sex-curious or wondered what really goes on behind BDSM doors, you might find this memoir quite intriguing, but be warned - Sonnet puts it all out there in vulgar detail. This book is selling sex stripped of any and all romantic inclinations. Sonnet has chosen to live a life where she makes her every fantasy a reality, and as can be imagined, the results are a life lived without inhibition. You have been warned.

Remember …

We listen and we don’t judge.

Very interesting, fascinating fast paced read, I am not one to comment on other people's sex lives think everyone should live the way they choose, so just interesting that's all. I will say it's very well written

DNF at 40% I was expecting this book to be more about the thoughts and experiences behind what led the author to discovering they liked a submissive role. Instead it just became a repetitive catalog of similar sexual experiences over and over. Also bothered by the glorification of public sexual acts that are bringing others into the kink without consent. Especially one instance where it was on a train when children could have been present.

While not exactly my cup of tea,this was an interesting read. A memoir of a someone in the BDSM world. While it did hold my attention for most of it, it is nothing something I would recommend to my friends.