This book was both fascinating and terrifying. Munchausen syndrome by proxy is a topic I have always been interested in, however, I still felt as though I learned so much reading this book. Detailing three different complex cases and the challenges involved in researching and prosecuting, the writing was easy to read and follow.

It is incredibly difficult to read about how easily these cases can fall apart due to politics or a lack of understanding. Hopefully books such as this one can help make the general public more aware of Munchausen by proxy. Although at times an upsetting read, I would highly recommend to anyone interested in learning more on the topic.

Thanks to NetGalley and St. Martin’s Press for the advanced copy.

Honestly, I thought this was a work of fiction when I requested it. I didn't read the blurb past the mention of Munchausen by Proxy. I was surprised to find out it was more of a case study, but I ended up enjoying it very much. It's well written and really taught me a lot about a subject that I thought I already knew a lot about. As a mother myself, it's so hard to believe that a mother can be capable of such horrific things.

📚The Mother Next Door: Medicine, Deception, and Munchausen by Proxy by Andrea Dunlop & Mike Weber

CWs for graphic descriptions of hospitalizations and ailments (both real and made up), child abuse, gaslighting/manipulation, and pretty much anything else you can think of given the topic at hand

Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️/5

A huge thanks to NetGalley for this ARC in exchange for an honest review!

“No bond is more sacred than the one between a mother and child. And no figure is more sympathetic than a mother whose child faces a life-threatening illness. But what if the mother is the reason for the illness?”

I’ve worked as a medical/behavioral health social worker for over 7 years, and diagnoses like Munchausen by Proxy (MBP) have always felt so elusive and scary to me. I've always wanted to learn more about MBP in particular, especially given how uncommon it is and the fact that the stakes are so exceptionally high. Andrea Dunlop (an author who witnessed MBP within her immediate family) and Mike Weber (a law enforcement professional specializing in medical child abuse with over 20 years of experience) are both uniquely qualified to shed light on this topic. I was engrossed right from the start and had a hard time putting this down. I love reading nonfiction where you can clearly feel the the passion and knowledge of the authors.

This book provides a detailed explanation of what MBP is, what it often gets confused for, the way that medical abuse cases have been handled in the past, and goals for tackling it in the future. Through three separate real life case studies (Hope, Brittany, & Mary), the authors effectively portrayed the varying faces and insidious forms that MBP can take. This book truly gives you a front row seat to the gaslighting, manipulation, coercion, fissures in relationships, and heartbreak that is so common within MBP.

Let's start this by saying this book will make you so incredibly angry and frustrated at times. Most obviously, it can be incredibly hard to wrap your head around the fact that someone could intentionally harm their own child for various reasons (ie., attention, money, sympathy). It bluntly showed how the system has failed (and will likely continue to fail) children in situations where medical abuse is evident.

As angry as I was with the perpetrators and the people in their lives that reinforced the behavior, I found myself even more angry with the providers. I remember this one patient I had that presented to multiple EDs across multiple state lines requesting alcohol detox. Through a basic chart review, I quickly noticed that the patient’s blood alcohol content was not always checked (and it was checked it was always 0.00). I brought this up to the treatment team and was immediately faced with resistance (because what does the dumb social worker know, right?). Long story short, we eventually discovered that the patient was a benzodiazepine addict that was pursuing alcohol detox in order to get the detox medications (benzos). I felt so angry and helpless after the fact. Both in the fact that my concerns were so quickly dismissed by the doctors, but we ultimately became her glorified dealer and were just as culpable in her illness. I felt all of those emotions come rushing back when I was reading about the numerous providers that performed invasive and expensive procedures on children without doing a thorough history/assessment/chart review. It absolutely broke my heart. I understand that there’s only so much that a provider can do during a 15 minute interaction (and the heavy reliance on self-report from the parent), but there are still steps that a provider should be taking to provide basic ethical care in line with their license.

But then there were moments where you couldn’t help but feel hopeful. It showed examples of bystanders using their voices and speaking up when they saw something that wasn't right. It showed us people like Mike Weber, a passionate professional driven to protect all children from MBP and medical abuse. I really liked how respectful they were when discussing Child Protective Services and social workers in general. They succinctly explained how CPS is not always able to act when faced with a dangerous situation, and how it is an overworked and underpaid job. I also felt like the authors did a good job at emphasizing the importance of a multi-disciplinary approach when addressing MBP. Everyone (bystanders/law enforcement/hospitals/families) need to work together if we want to make any progress.

Ultimately, I think the biggest takeaway from this book is “see something, say something”. You never want to people that person that suspects something but finds whatever reason to not make a report. Maybe you think you “don’t have enough proof”. Maybe you think you’re “making a big deal out of nothing”. Maybe you're a doctor that thinks they "don't have enough time to make a report" (yes, I've actually seen that happen). It doesn’t matter. If you suspect that a child could possibly be experiencing medical abuse, make a report. It is not your job as the bystander to prove abuse (there are literally people that get paid to do exactly that).

I highly recommend picking this book, but definitely make sure you're in the right headspace before diving in.

Andrea Weber and Mike Dunlop had me tumbling through my feelings this one. This book dives into three cases of Munchausen by proxy investigated by Detective Dunlop. Firstly, as a mother it is always so hard to hear stories like these, but to find out how much they are underreported is seriously disheartening. The Mother Next Door dives into the deception of each mother in these cases through interviews with, family, friends, co-workers, and medical professionals. Each tale, a little more eerie than the last. Seriously... I can't believe it's not fiction. It demonstrates exactly how hard it is to bring justice to the victims in these cases as politics, culpability, family ties can often get in the way, before prosecutors can even bring these cases forward, let alone make a conviction for medical child abuse. Andrea's commentary gives hope and insight in these cases as MBP has effected her family. Thankfully, there are people like Andrea and Mike who continue to bring awareness and fight for these children.

Thank you to NetGalley and St. Martin Press for the advanced copy.

Holy cow, this book was A LOT. I have never read a book that taught me so much but at the same time, broke my heart.

This story is written by two authors who both had experiences with Munchausen by proxy (MBP). We follow along with three cases where mothers were causing harm to their children. The way these stories broke my heart, I'll be thinking about this for a while.

Being in the medical field, I have heard of MBP, of course the most obvious case is the Gypsy Rose case that was televised and followed for years, but this story really showed me how hard it is to have a case like this taken seriously. How long it takes for a case to be put together for it to just fall apart and nothing be done. It's hard to digest.

This story wasn't written perfectly. It was wordy and repetitive, but I feel as though the information given, and the story is so important for people to read. I will say, if you're a momma of young children, parts of this story will be hard to read. The way these mothers had no remorse for what they did just blows my mind.

If you don't know much about MBP, I highly recommend giving this book a read. It's a quick read and it packs and punch. I'm so thankful I read it.

Thanks for giving me a chance to discover something new.

This is not usually the kind of book I read but I really enjoyed it. Great subject and I am now wanting to learn more about this.

I have so many thoughts and so many questions!! I've typed out my review and deleted it many times since finishing.

I requested this book on Netgalley, truly wanting to keep an open mind towards Andrea and knowing I could form my own opinion about MBP (Munchausen by Proxy) and the perpetrators. I don't feel every single case is going to automatically mean a child is being abused, or that a mother needs to be put through the ringer over trying to care for her child, BUT I do know women are fully capable of hurting/killing their children. It's a very sad reality that we live in. I do not know what needs to happen in regards to MBP, nor do I know where to even begin to get tougher laws passed for both mothers and providers, but something needs to give before another child suffers at the hands of the one person who should love and cherish them.

I have 20 years of experience working in the medical field. It absolutely baffles me that a provider would 1) not do their own testing to confirm a diagnosis and 2) review other providers' records before making a plan to do any invasive procedures or surgeries. I realize that insurance isn't going to cover testing every single time a child goes to a new doctor, but there must be a way to prevent MBP from going on so long without being caught. I'm heartbroken that mothers and providers are getting away with it. Yes, I absolutely believe providers should be held accountable for not taking the time to properly treat a patient or, in the three cases mentioned in this book, not treat a patient for unnecessary reasons.

I don't have the answers, but my gosh, does my heart hurt for these innocent children being mistreated by anyone who is supposed to love and care for them.

Thank you to Netgalley and St. Martin's Press for this ARC. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

This was an absolutely amazing and eye-opening book. While incredibly sad and emotional, the author did a great job conveying the facts of the cases presented without biases. Her personal connection to medical child abuse brought the book to life, but of course, it’s devastating to know she’s lost her sister in her life because of it. I found myself absolutely riveted by the cases, and I plan to listen to Andrea’s podcast for even more information.

This is a must-read for all lovers of narrative nonfiction and fans of Law and Order: SVU!

This book about Munchausen by Proxy is both disturbing and fascinating. A must read for all true crime junkies.

Thank you Netgalley for the ARC of The Mother Next Door.
This book was a page turner. It followed stories of 3 women and their families as they were being charged with endangering their own children.
Based on Munchausen by Proxy, these moms would all tell their doctors what was wrong with their kids. These conditions ranged from Gerd issues to brain issues and everything in between. This would cause the kids to undergo major unneeded surgical procedures.
Mike was an investigator for child abuse cases and Andrea had her own personal experience with this syndrome. Although I do wish she would have gone in to more detail about her own situation, the book itself was very well written and sometimes extremely hard to read. These kids should not have had to suffer at the expense of their mom wanting attention. And in most cases the rest of the family didn't even know.
One mom went as far as to say that she had cancer to get all the attention as well as her child having major (unnecessary) procedures. Although a couple of these stories ended with prison sentences for the mom, not all cases end in favor or the child.
Mike did a great job trying to give details to everyone involved to try and take these cases to court. Even if the outcomes weren't what he hoped for.
Very well written and descriptive book! 4.5 🌟

5-Stars

The Mother Next Door: Medicine, Deception, and Munchausen by Proxy by Andrea Dunlop and Detective Mike Weber is a meticulously researched, eye-opening exploration of one of the most disturbing forms of child abuse—Munchausen by Proxy (MBP). This book offers a sobering look at the psychological manipulation behind MBP, where caregivers, typically mothers, intentionally harm or fabricate illness in their children for attention and sympathy. Dunlop and Weber highlight not only the personal tragedies that unfold but also the serious failures within our social care and justice systems that allow these crimes to continue unchecked.

The authors have done an exceptional job in carefully presenting real-life cases without sensationalizing the subject matter. Through their own personal experiences with real cases and in-depth research, they paint a thorough and empathetic picture of what it’s like for children who fall victim to MBP, as well as the professionals who must navigate these complex cases.

What stands out most in The Mother Next Door is its unflinching focus on the systemic issues that fail to protect children. Dunlop and Weber shed light on the gaps in social care systems and the often insufficient legal action taken against perpetrators. The book does an excellent job of illustrating how even when abuse is suspected, it can be difficult for authorities to intervene in a meaningful way, leaving many children vulnerable.

The Mother Next Door reads with the accessibility and flow of a compelling narrative, making it approachable for the everyday reader. Despite its heavy subject matter, the book avoids the dryness of a textbook, offering a balanced and engaging storytelling approach that keeps you hooked while also informing and educating. It’s compelling, deeply human, and hard-hitting, but always respectful of the gravity of the issue. A must-read piece of non-fiction that raises awareness of a growing issue and calls for meaningful change in how we protect children from this form of abuse.

I thought this book would have more about the authors family issues, but I completely understood why she stopped and could not dive deeper into it. While the stories told in this book were pretty much the same it gave detail on what needs to be evaluated when looking into MBP. I loved the fact that Mike was able to share details of how be put case information together. As a criminal law major with a minor in psychology these stories shared gave a more in-depth of the realities dealing with a person accused of MBP and how the criminal justice system overlooks important information when all the facts are not clearly presented. Had this book been published and available at the time I was in school I would have made a recommendation that students read and discuss it openly.

Definitely a book I will recommend.

I am not familiar with Andrea Dunlop's fiction writing, having come across her podcast first. I will say, if you have listened to her podcast there is a lot that is repeated but this is an even deeper dive into the three highlighted cases. The writing style is extremely approachable- people who don't think they like non-fiction will be able to read this book. For those not familiar with the podcast, this book is greatly informative about the different ways that Munchausen by Proxy presents as well as the very different outcomes that are possible based on where it ends up in the justice system. Honestly, the disturbing nature of this disorder and the societal inclination to not want to believe in its validity almost makes this required reading.

Wow. I could not put down this deeply disturbing non-fiction book on Munchausen and Munchausen by proxy. It's truly unbelievable the horror these poor children experienced and a system that isn't set up to identify this type of abuse. This will stay with me for a long time.

Thank you Netgalley and St. Martin's Press for the advanced reader copy.

Not me being obsessed with MBP since I was young and then reading this masterpiece. I am obsessed with this book. Obsessed. I don't need to walk you through who the characters are or how this story build a psychological tension that was palpable, I'm just going to tell you I need garlic pills because the blood pressure rising was real.

As a true crime junkie, it is nice to get a book that goes more into detail how Munchausen By Proxy (or Ficticious Disorder By Proxy) works, how it shows up, and the level of physical and emotional wreckage this particular form of abuse leaves in its wake.

I am somewhat cautious of recommending this book as some digging around has revealed that some issues exist regarding the writer’s credibility. I am unable to comment on this one way or the other, but I felt it warranted being repeated.

I felt like this book did a good job of exploring the three case studied but I wish there was a little more about why they did what they did. I guess its difficult to know that and the abusers themselves might not know. Oddly some of the more interesting tidbits were about how these cases were investigated and why. The fact that they all lived in the same county makes you think this crime might be more common than you'd think.

I did find the insertion of Dunlop's personal life into the book a little odd, I felt like there was little backstory and explanation there and it was written as if we already know this woman. I do not.

I am not sure how an autism test comes back "negative"--it is not a blood draw.

Haunting. Harrowing. Horrifying. Three words that describe this book perfectly. It blows my mind that Munchausen by Proxy is still not recognized as a disorder, nor taken seriously. In a world where everyone gets up in arms about protecting children, many are left completely at the mercy of their parents. Worse yet, they're conditioned from before they can walk or talk to think they're sick, disabled, and need their parents to provide for them and to undergo unnecessary procedures and take unnecessary medications. It's so sad. This book follows a few major cases that crossed the desk of one of the only MBP detectives. None of them had I heard of, all of them left my jaw hanging open. It's a great read, hooked me from the start. I finished it in two days!

I've loved reading true crime stories since I was a teenager. This book checked all of the boxes for such a thrilling story and also a sad one too. No one wants to deal with family members who claim that their child or spouse is sick when they aren't. It puts a thought in many minds, and this book was hard to put down. I read it in just two days and started rereading it. If you're into true crime or stories, this book is for you. I highly recommend it to everyone.

This was a book I thought I would be interested in but the format killed it for me. It looked like someone had cut & paste from different Word documents. It made it hard to read enjoy.