3.25 stars

First, I am so glad books like Ollie in Between exist. It so important that these stories are written and are available.

Second, the rest of this review absolutely contains spoilers.
I wanted this book to be a favorite, but it just didn’t work for me.
Introductions to 18 characters (some in name only) in the first 20 pages was a bit of information overload. While I saw what the author was trying to do, the refrain of “it’s fine” every other page started to wear on me as a reader.
I found myself feeling like I was reading session notes where someone was processing their mother’s death for the first time, discovering gender identity, grappling with the concept of puberty, losing friendships, at some points touching on a possible neurodivergence diagnosis, and having many anxious thoughts, which is a lot simultaneously in the span of dozens of pages. As a result, much of the book left me feeling stressed by everything that was unceremoniously unpacked so quickly.

However, the moment of the first queer book club, my heart rate slowed and I, too, got to feel like I was coming home.
That scene made the book for me and I was hopeful.
Unfortunately, the bliss was somewhat short-lived.

We talk often about how few representations of queer joy exist in media. I so wanted this book to be filled to the brim with queer joy. And while we got queer joy in the last 40 pages, which was magical, the stress on the preceding pages was hard for me and I wanted even more of the joy and celebration

While I don’t anticipate Ollie in Between being a re-read for me, I so look forward to seeing more from this author in the future. More great things are sure to come.

Thank you to Jess Callans and Feiwel & Friends (an Imprint of Macmillan) for granting me an ARC through NetGalley.

I loved this. This was so well written and thought out and felt like a great read for me as an adult and I think it would be amazing for its intended demographic.

This book felt incredibly realistic and did a great job at portraying how tough puberty can really be along with questioning one's identity. How it is to want to belong and how important it is to find people who love and respect you. I very much enjoyed it.

Ollie In Between by Jess Callans is a heartfelt middle-grade novel that delves into the complexities of adolescence, identity, and the quest for belonging. The story follows Ollie Thompson, a nearly 13-year-old navigating the turbulent waters of puberty, shifting friendships, and the profound question of self-identity.​

Ollie's journey begins with a school assignment: an essay on what it means to be a woman. This prompts a series of interviews with various women in their life, leading to more questions than answers. As Ollie grapples with feelings of not fitting into traditional gender norms—being too "girly" for the hockey team yet not "girly" enough for their best friend—the narrative captures the essence of adolescent confusion and the longing for self-understanding.​

Callans masterfully portrays Ollie's internal struggles, using a first-person narrative that feels intimate and genuine. The depiction of Ollie's experiences with bullying, grief over a lost parent, and the challenges of forming new friendships is both poignant and realistic. The inclusion of a queer book club offers a beacon of hope, illustrating the importance of supportive communities in one's journey of self-discovery.​

What stands out is the novel's ability to address heavy topics with a balance of humor and sensitivity. Ollie's voice is authentic, filled with introspection, wit, and vulnerability. The narrative doesn't shy away from the discomforts of adolescence but instead embraces them, offering readers a mirror to their own experiences.​

While the pacing is deliberate, allowing for deep character exploration, some readers might find it slower than typical middle-grade novels.

Ollie In Between is a compelling read that resonates with anyone who's ever felt out of place or questioned their identity. It's a valuable addition to middle-grade literature, offering representation and understanding to readers navigating their own "in-between" moments.

Puberty, aka the ultimate biological predator, is driving a wedge between Ollie, who is soon to be thirteen, and their lifelong friends. Because Ollie is neither masculine enough for the neighborhood boys' hockey team nor feminine enough for Cal, their boy-crazy best friend, Ollie's gender expression is a problem for both groups. But if there is one thing that Ollie knows for sure, it is that they are not a girl. Ollie does not know where they fit in. Their usual ability to camouflage is being disrupted by all the surrounding changes.

Because health class lacks LGBTQ+ sex ed, Ollie, who is not a girl and does not want to be a woman, is unsure if their feelings are normal. It is all from a straight gender assigned at birth point of view. Ollie has to write an essay for health and writes it on what it means to be a woman, not as much for the class but for themself because Ollie does not think there is a choice for them. They try to do things like shop for bras and have their sister help them try on makeup, and they hope by writing this essay they will embrace womanhood.

Ollie is afraid to discuss their gender identity at home. Their mom died when they were 8, and Ollie is not sure about how their dad and college-age sister Lila will react and is afraid that this will cause them to lose their family. Their Mimi keeps calling and asking them why their dad does not make them dress like a girl since they are about to be thirteen. Ollie has an unspecified difficulty with social cues and hyper-fixations. Their friends are making new friends which, because of Ollie's difficulty, is difficult for them to do.

There had been an anonymous question box in health class, and when it was their turn to draw a question for the teacher to answer, Ollie wound up drawing their own, which was, what if I do not want to be a woman? A while after that, one girl from their health class comes up to them and says their health teacher is wrong and no one has to become a woman and that there is no one way to be a woman either, which makes Ollie think she understood it was Ollie's question. Ollie gets pushed out of neighborhood hockey for being a girl. They are 7th graders.

The pressure to do the right thing, dress and act girly, wear makeup and bras, use she/her pronouns rather than to be the person they were meant to be, is weighing on Ollie. They hate going by their birth name, but kids at school and their Mimi keep calling them it. They are so scared to make friends that might understand them because they do not want to get pushed farther away by hanging out with kids who get bullied for being different. Ollie's mom dying and her sister being in college means that Ollie is not prepared for bodily changes at all like bras and periods and being expected to shave legs and armpits. Ollie has their first panic attack buying bras.

They wish something terrible would happen so they would not have to get periods or grow breasts. Ollie interviewed numerous women for their health essay. One teacher thinks that a lot of what is defined as masculinity and femininity has to do with social norms. Ollie's sister Lila discusses how their mom told her that growing up in Iran, she was raised to be as small and quiet as possible. Lila felt like she took up too much space in the wrong way, so she told her to take up as much space as she needed.

Then Lila tells Ollie that she thinks the world gives mixed signals on how women and girls should act: don't be too quiet but do not be too loud either, don't be bossy but do not be a pushover. Lila explains their mom wanted them to be strong feminists, and Ollie says, was she not a stay-at-home parent? Lila explains that while she had decided that she would stay home with Ollie, she had worked when Lila was younger. She explains that femininity is about having the life that you want for yourself and not one that someone else or society expects you to have.

Ollie learns a lot about friendship and what having real friends and being a real friend is about when they decide to make friends with the kids they were worried about before. They find a sense of community and acceptance that they did not think could exist for them. The story wraps up nicely even with questions left unanswered about Ollie's future. Nobody knows their future at thirteen, anyway.

I enjoyed this book very much as a nonbinary trans masc person. I wish there had been access to books like this when I was growing up. This book, and others like it, will hopefully make kids feel more seen and understood, which makes me happy.

Reviewers note: Ollie is not set on what pronouns to use throughout most of the book except for knowing they do not like she\her at all. I used they\them throughout this review to be respectful of this.

I thank Macmillan Children's Publishing Group | Feiwel & Friends for providing an e-arc of this book and NetGalley for its book review platform.

“Ollie in Between” offers readers a unique coming of age story featuring the experience of a gender diverse tween, trying to understand their position in the world. How does one fit into a box when the other people in the box don’t even understand what it looks like?

Ollie’s neurodivergence will help other neurodivergent kids feel seen. Their experience looking up movie plots felt like it was plucked out of my own life.

I think the voice given to experiences as a gender nonconforming tween is a voice that needs to be heard and highlighted more in middle grade and YA fiction, and I’m appreciative of the dynamics presented.

My only question is Ollie’s heritage: there were a few moments within the novel that seemed to highlight a uniquely Persian-American perspective. However, a lack of a Persian name for Ollie and some other parts throughout struck oddly. A section in the acknowledgements covering the author’s personal experience as a Persian-American or discussing the real life Persian-Americans who influenced their writing of Ollie would’ve been beneficial, in my mind.

Educators can use “Ollie in Between” to start a conversation about gender identity and how school can become an unsafe place to explore. Questions about assignments that have influenced students or made them feel unseen will likely pair well with a class reading of the novel.

This could've been a heartachingly bleak read in this current climate of widespread and state-sactioned hostility against trans and nonbinary children. And not gonna lie, Ollie's justified fear and paralysis over their identity did gut me and took me back to similar feelings of shame and insufficiency as a genderqueer child. But ultimately this ended up being rather wholesome, with no particularly horrific tragedies befalling queer children, and transphobia of all ages being called out and put in their places, but not magically converted out of their bigotry. I like that for a middle grade book, even if it lacks nuance for even a slightly older young adult reader. Ollie's interview project, akin to the author's which led to both of their gender journey, is super interesting in revealing how everyone in the spectrum of gender is isolated in their own ways, and that was refreshing to see in a middle grade book. That said, the part I wish would be been explored a bit more was about their Persian side of the family and what that heritage brought to the table of the gender questioning beyond just the food and the vague memories of a deceased mom. Thanks to Netgalley for an ebook ARC.

I thought that I would really like this is if I was a lot younger but this felt a bit insufferable to read. I like the representation but this book wasn't for me. It felt a bit juvenile and unrealistic compared to my experiences coming out and with other people coming out to me. I might come back to this but overall I didn't love it.

- OLLIE IN BETWEEN is a middle grade novel inspired by ARE YOU THERE, GOD? IT’S ME MARGARET starring a kid discovering they might be trans.
- It’s by turns funny and heartbreaking, and you just want to squeeze Ollie and their friends so tightly.
- I think I’d put this on the upper end of middle grade, as it tackles some hard and complex topics like transphobia and misogyny.

Thank you to Netgalley and the publishers for this ARC!

This book follows Ollie, a nonbinary child, who’s working on a project for health class to figure out what womanhood means while also trying to figure who they are and where they fit.

I really loved this book! I may have teared up a few times while I was reading. I really enjoyed the discussions Ollie would have about womanhood and what it means to the people she interviewed. I also liked seeing how all of these discussions ended up helping Ollie figure out who they are and find a new friend group who accepts them for who they are.

I can definitely see this book being helpful to people of all ages, queer or not, since we’re all just trying to figure what it means to be us. I’m excited to read more books by Jess in the future.

actual rating: 4.5 stars

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for an e-ARC in exchange for an honest review.

3.5 stars. This is the story of Ollie—a biracial kid in middle school grappling with the loss of their mother and their own intense emotions about puberty and gender.

“But what if growing up honest means that I don’t know whether the people I love most deeply will love the deepest parts of me in this world where so many people would rather have me dead or different or at least so out of sight that they can pretend I don’t exist?”

As someone who doesn’t fit in the gender binary, this book called to me and I was so very excited to read it. And for what it is, I loved it. It’s a book I would have gobbled up as a kid as there was so much I related too. I thoroughly enjoyed that this was more nuanced and deeper than other books I’ve read featuring trans MCs. Reading between the lines, Ollie is also neurodivergent and I appreciated how the author leaned into that with how Ollie perceived the world and questioned it.

The author’s note said this was inspired by Judy Blume’s Are You There God It’s Me Margaret, which I really didn’t like as a kid (I did not understand the period obsession). And I’m glad there’s now another perspective out there on puberty, womanhood, and identity. I really appreciated the message that there is no one way to be a woman and that periods just are and really don’t need to be celebrated.

My reasoning for deducting stars is the pacing and the how this wraps up. It was a rather slow, character driven book with a lot of introspection from Ollie and not so much action. Which is fine, but sometimes I felt like we got lost in Ollie’s thoughts and were missing out on character interactions that could have shown us their point even better. While I did love the family dynamics, I felt like both dad and Lila were kind of flat characters and when Ollie was going through some big emotions and getting their period, Lila was just absent, and there was never a scene where they reconciled what Lila had previously stated about trans folks. I did love dad’s reaction to it all—it felt more genuine than Lila’s.

I also felt like the ending was too neatly wrapped up. Ollie’s grief about their mother was a passenger the entire book. I expected some kind of realization or something to at least happen to the letters that they had written to her. It felt like a missed opportunity with Cal who also was seen at the throne. I also don’t understand Cal’s and Nate’s change in heart. There was really no catalysis for it, only Ollie calling them out, which fine, but at that age I think you need more than words from a friend to realize going against the grain is the right thing to do, especially in Nate’s case—I would have liked to have seen him interact positively with Ollie more through out the book so that him showing up at the end made sense. While I’m all for happy endings, especially for queer books, they also should be realistic and true to the characters.

Overall, I feel this is an important book and has so many relatable moments. I just wish there weren’t so many missed opportunities and the end better reflected the characters.

Thank you to Macmillan Children's Publishing Group and NetGalley for the eARC!

Oh, this book has my whole heart. Raw, honest, and a little hard to read at times, this book is incredibly profound and emotional. Watching the journey Ollie takes from the beginning of the book when they ask, "What if you don't want to become a woman?" to the end of the book when they start to accept who they are is a tumultuous rollercoaster ride, but it's refreshingly real in it's depiction. The lesson here is clear: It's hard to "Be Yourself" as everyone says, and it's even harder when you don't even know who you are or who you want to be. Ollie is essentially, lost, and looking for guidance at a time where everything is changing, and this is such a refreshing narrative for young readers to read.

I had a couple of issues with the pacing of the ending, mostly that I wish we had seen the stuff that happens with the principal or heard a bit of Ollie's essay but overall, I loved the book. Can't wait to purchase for my school's library!

I loved seeing the unique way that Ollie experiences the world and the wonder that comes with it. I am autistic myself, so it was nice to see that representation even if it wasn't stated. I wish I had this book as a kid <3

I really felt like had I been more self-aware as a child I would have been Ollie. Everything about them is so relatable and how they experience gender and sexuality and friendships and hobbies is so similar to me that I really felt right at home with this book. It absolutely wrenched my heart strings a little bit and I am so happy that I got a chance to read this and that it exists for other people to find.

My autism as a kid and teenager was more of the just do what others are doing and everything will be fine and in a way Ollie is like that as well but they recognize that something is different with them. I didn't notice that as a child. I just tried to blend in and do what my two friends were doing. so seeing Ollie start this book with two main friends who both end up being a bit disappointing and finding a group of friends that is so much more inclusive was really heartwarming. I loved their relationship with their sister and their super awkward definitely autistic dad.

this one does deal with some queer phobia and transphobia from both other students and from Ollie's grandparents. I understand that could be difficult to read so if that is going to be triggering maybe skip this one. I will say that it's all dealt with and Ollie is supported so do it that what you will.

One of the big highlights for this for me was Ollie's interviews with women in their life. and then reading the authors know at the end that this is something they did in college was really fascinating for me. I love that the general consensus is that no one really knows what womanhood is and that felt very relatable as an AFAB agender person.

this is very much a character driven book and there's not a ton of plot going on. I would classify it almost as a slice of life but where Ollie is dealing with their mom's death and figuring out their own gender, autism, and sexuality as a preteen.

Iranian American MC, autistic, aspec questioning, nonbinary

Ollie In Between is a beautiful coming of age story. I loved so much to watch Ollie find their people to love and fiercely defend them. I was particularly glad to listen to this as an audiobook because it felt like I was along with Ollie in their own diary.

Thank you Netgalley for the e-ARC but sadly this is my first DNF (25%) this year ;( I find it difficult to follow this kind of story—a very character driven story. It feels all over the place and the inner monologue is a torture to follow. I kind of understand that it's supposed to be delivered this way and I'm sure this book will find its audience.

I love Ollie so much. They are so, so extremely relatable, and not just for nonbinary folks—for almost every human being, the period around puberty and its seemingly unavoidable changes to one's physicality and social life is, at best, tumultuous, if not outright chaos. This is a really excellent, funny, just extremely charming middle grade/young adult novel about being yourself, even if that means nonconformity with other people's ideas of who you should become.

This is one of the most important books I’ve ever read in my life and it needs to be on a shelf in every middle school library (even if it’ll probably get banned from half of them). Ollie In Between is an incredibly difficult read, especially as a nonbinary, neurodivergent adult. The writing managed to evoke the strongest sense of viscera I’ve ever experienced, often depicting the exact thoughts and feelings I experienced around the same age. I frequently had to set this book aside for days, sometimes even weeks, at a time in order to finish it, but I’m so glad I did. This is a story that desperately needed to be told and I’m so glad someone was brave enough to do so.

FIVE BRIGHT AND SHINY STARS FOR THIS GEM OF A BOOK! Ollie In Between is a story about a middle schooler trying to figure out who they are after being given an assignment to write an essay on what it means to be a woman. But it is also a story about growing up, about friendship, about grief, and about mental health. I loved getting to experience it all through Ollie’s inner monologue.

Along with the heavy topics featured in the book comes some potentially triggering instances of bullying, transphobia, homophobia, panic attacks/sensory overload, death of a parent (off page, past) which should be kept in mind before reading!

I hope Jess Callans continues to write queer stories like this!

ollie in between is a tender, emotional story following young ollie as they navigate the uncharted territories of identity, growing up, and growing into yourself.

the entire cast of character leapt off the page, entirely realistic and human.

beautiful exploration of friendship, family, community, mental health, gender identity, intersectionality, and the necessity of standing up for what you believe in

ollie in between lands itself alongside will taylor’s the language of seabirds in the ever growing pile of books that I Wish I Had As A Child

a poignant read amidst the current sweep of book bans that target queer communities and ostracize queer youth, especially queer poc!!!!

beyond grateful for netgalley and feiwel & friends for the arc of this book!

This book gave me flashbacks to middle school. The descriptions of peer interactions were so raw and real that they hit me viscerally, making me ache alongside Ollie, who is cued neurodivergent but without a label or support structure, as I was at their age. Readers who like Ollie are questioning their gender identity will find solidarity and authenticity in this story, and readers who do not share Ollie's nonbinary identity will also find solidarity and authenticity in the many other middle school "in betweens" explored in the novel: being in between a kid and a grown up, in between a bully and a hero, in between a friend and an enemy. I highly recommend this beautiful debut to middle school students.