“Inside her beat something else’s heart. Something else’s will. This time tomorrow, she’d cut it out.”

Everyone has demons—but some are worse than others. Vivienne Farrow’s, for example, lives inside her with wickedly sharp teeth and a poisonous voice. After falling into Red Rock Canyon and being claimed by the dark as a child, Vivienne has become a selective-mute in a desperate bid to maintain some semblance of control over her voice and body. Still, the face in the mirror isn’t hers, and every night is a struggle. Willing to do anything to regain mastery of her life, Vivienne has planned an illicit surgical exorcism. Her parents throw a wrench in her designs, however, when they hire Thomas Walsh to ostensibly serve as her ASL interpreter and ‘watch after her.’ That is, keep her in line. Vivienne needs to eliminate him to achieve her goals, but Thomas, in dire need of the money the job offers, refuses to be shaken. Their wills clash as the powers that be threaten to crush them both beneath their heels.

Kelly Andrew’s spine-tingling narrative left me simultaneously giggling over Thomas and Vivienne’s relationship and adamantly avoiding my mirrors at night, and I couldn’t have asked for more. Coming into I Am Made of Death, I certainly expected the horror and suspense prevalent throughout the novel, but I did not expect to become as fond of Thomas and Vivienne as I did. Somehow, while slowly suffocating both characters and readers with mounting dread of the thing taking up residence in Vivienne’s blood and bones, Andrew crafts a believable, heart-warming relationship between the main characters with the help of alternating POVs. The appearances of certain side characters may be more significant or enjoyable to readers who have completed Andrew’s other books, but the central cast of I Am Made of Death is lovable all on its own. Adding to the endearing elements of the book were the many references sprinkled throughout the story, which never felt awkward or outdated as they so often do. As a Classics student, I particularly enjoyed Andrew’s use of Greek mythology and Homeric epigraphs. I also appreciated her nuanced storytelling, which paid attention to things such as the tone of Vivienne’s signing, how interpretation gets abused, and the various difficulties of managing chronic illness. I would have liked some of the world-building to be a little more fleshed-out (although Andrew’s other books may lay the groundwork for this one), but I adored this story nonetheless.

This book was the sole reason behind my sleepless nights this week.

Andrew is a wizard at crafting horror elements within an otherwise regular world and created a heroine dressed in pink with the most horrific evil companion.

After a traumatic incident as a child, Vivienne refuses to talk and uses sign language and other visual & written cues to communicate with the outside world. Thomas is hired as her interpreter but soon realizes that he might've bitten off more than he can chew.

There were so many moments in this story that I literally wanted to crawl out of my skin. Nights become longer and the evil was portrayed in such a visceral way that bathrooms became a space of dread.

While this book can be read as a standalone, for the best reading experience I recommend to read it after The Whispering Dark, as there are multiple side characters making an appearance from TWD.

4.25⭐️

Thank you so much to Scholastic Press for the eARC of I Am Made of Death by Kelly Andrew in exchange for an honest review. This book was my final of 2024, and it did not disappoint.

From the very beginning, I was enthralled, staying up way too late reading. Vivienne was fantastic - a ballerina possessed by an evil entity who can make people die just by speaking. So great. I felt her rage and terror through the pages. And Thomas! He really was her ride or die, and if I’m ever possessed, I’d want someone like him on my side.

Like I said, I was obsessed with this book for the most part. It gave me Ninth House meets Lady Macbeth meets The Metamorphosis in the best way. The one issue I had with the book is that I was confused about the societies and Thomas’s friends until I realized that all of Kelly’s books tie together. While you can definitely read I Am Made of Death as a standalone and enjoy it, the addition of new people and abilities may throw you a little. I’m going to do myself a favor and pick up her other books too.

All said, I Am Made of Death was a great way to round out the year—lyrical prose, rage, Eldritch terrors, possession, and bubblegum horror? So so good.

O.M.G. ‘I Am Made of Death’ by Kelly Andrew is like if ‘Twilight’ and ‘The Exorcist*’ had a baby, and that baby was the most electrifying dark romance of the decade that CHANGED my entire brain chemistry in the best way possible.

Kelly Andrew is an absolute mastermind. The TENSION? The BANTER? The CHEMISTRY? The SUSPENSE??? I was holding the edge of my seat for probably 90% of the time. And the romance…. gosh when I tell you it was BURNING in the best way possible.

Can we talk about how Vivienne is on a mission to find a “surgical exorcism”? The fact that that’s even a plot point makes me feel like I’ve fallen into some wild fever dream and I don’t ever want to wake up😫

All I need to say is this book SHOULD NOT be slept on. I need this to be the book of the CENTURY. That’s how GOOD it was. It was a perfect dark, and twisted love story that will have you at the tip of your toes and edge of your seat. Trust me when I say you DONT want to miss this😏

First let me say if you haven’t read The Whispering Dark by Kelly Andrew you really should before reading this because there is a big overlap between these books!!!

The aforementioned overlap/tie-in to TWD is phenomenally done and I was squealing and gasping at the reveals. Of Kelly’s books (I’ve read them all!), this was the best written in terms of plot pacing and story development. I couldn’t read fast enough! I am not a big horror girlie and yet I was hooked from the start.

Literally my only qualm is I would’ve loved more relationship development as it felt very sudden. Which is a bummer cause it’s not a long book & I would have gladly read more chapters to expand upon this!

If you’re sleeping on Kelly’s books idk what to tell you but you’re MISSING OUT! Do yourself a favor and start with TWD then honestly just work your way forward or skip right into IAMOD 🎀

Content Warnings
Graphic: Death, Murder, and Injury/Injury detail
Moderate: Body horror, Chronic illness, Emotional abuse, Blood, Medical content, and Classism
Minor: Animal death, Child abuse, and Confinement

I grew up as a ballerina AND a horror movie girlie, so as soon as I picked up I Am Made of Death I felt cosmically intertwined. I don’t typically pick up horror and thriller adjacent genres-but I Am Made of Death has a little bit of everything: a delicious touch of dark academia, a gruesome calling card of body horror, a bit of gossip girl, a touch of classic horror and suspense, and ROMANCE, of course-I loved all of it.

I Am Made of Death opens with our MMC Thomas Walsh accepting a job to interpret for Vivienne Farrow, a mute ballerina surrounded by caretakers who hardly give her the time or attention to truly listen. Thomas is hoping to sustain his tuition and his family with his work, but the curious nature of his job and his clients-the Farrows, prove to be thorny and difficult. The relationship between Vivienne and Thomas quickly escalates past interpreter and ballerina-and the story unravels in a maelstrom of curious deaths, a raving Gatby-esque party, and stark consequences. Vivienne is hosting a horde of secrets, and Thomas is bent on uncovering each of them.

Not only is Thomas a root-able character, but the story told between the two POV’s (Thomas/Vivienne) does SO much for the narrative. I love the limited perspective we get of the story from Thomas, and all of Vivienne’s thorny edges. Their romance is so pure and sweet-the perfect contrast for the dark spikes and crooked corners of this story. As a fantasy reader, I savored the fantastical elements but thoroughly enjoyed the twists and turns and creatures that littered the pages. And I LOVED the representation for the ASL community-yes, yes, all of it!

Also, I would be remised to leave out that I devoured this book in all of one evening-it was so bingeable.

Fans across genres will love Andrew’s writing-her characters are compelling, the prose is intriguing, and the story-addicting. I hope that you get the chance to pick up this lovely little novel!

He's her new bodyguard/interpreter... and he has no clue just what he's signed up because she might look like a delicate rich ballerina... but there's a demon inside of her with a bodycount and she'll do anything to get rid of it before it's too late. Part bodyguard romance, part Orpheus/Eurydice and all dark romance. Thomas Walsh has had to grow up quick after the death of his father looking after his younger sister and taking care of his mother's medical bills... and with debts piling up he doesn't think twice about securing a job as the new sign language interpreter/body guard for the wealthy Farrow family's selective-mute daughter, Vivienne. Vivienne hasn't said a single word since she went missing at four years old and nobody knows what has happened to her. Vivienne might come off as a spoiled rich ballerina but she's hiding a secret... she has no reflection and there's a demon inside her body that takes over and kills people/ Vivienne will do anything to get it out. With more people dying and her control slipping.... she needs a way out, it doesn't help that her step father has been using her to kill off his competition and the only people she can turn to to possible get out the demon is a dark occult house and an amateur med student... and the only person stopping her is her new bodyguard who is paid to watch her every movement. Vivienne has spent her days manipulating, bribing, and blackmailing everyone just in the hopes of getting rid of her demon... but what she's not prepared for is how caring and genuine Thomas actually is. Having spent her life with her guard up, Thomas might be the only person to crack her wall.... but if he finds out the truth of what she is and what is inside her, will he still love her? Thomas has never really done anything for himself... but finds himself breaking all the rules to have Vivienne... and he'll go far, possibly even to hell, for her because not even hell can keep them apart. This is the sequel to her previous book and I loved the cameo of the original characters in this one. I adored the relationship between Vivienne and Thomas so much, she's volatile but he's the perfect steadfast person for her. He's such a great love interest, with so much patience and persistence and no matter how much Vivienne tries to push him away he constantly proves that he will go to any lengths for her. I adored the touch of Orpheus/Eurydice vibes in this so much and the demon/exorcism aspect was such a delightful touch. I can't wait to read what Kelly writes next and just know she's become an auto-read author for me!

Release Date: March 4, 2025

Publication/Blog: Ash and Books (ash-and-books.tumblr.com)

*Thanks Netgalley and Scholastic | Scholastic Press for sending me an arc in exchange for an honest review*

I think it’s safe to say if you enjoy Kelly’s other books you will enjoy this one. This was an excellent continuation of the world she has been building and I think she has done a fantastic job interconnecting her books without making them dependent on each other. I do wish this book were longer, the relationship development took a backseat to the plot and seemingly came out of no where, however the plot was excellent. Kelly has this fever dream like writing style for the climax of her books which is hard for me as someone who likes to understand everything but I also appreciate that it’s the Vibe and completely in line with her other works.

I don’t think this had a strong enough aesthetic to be named (i.e. establishing the term bubblegum horror) - something I thought Kelly really nailed with YBMB. There was much less ballet in this book than I was led to expect as well.

Overall would definitely recommend!

I read the authors prior 2 books for this interconnected standalone but I really dont think it did any justice for me. Based solely on this book i felt there was a lack of character development, especially the relationship between the MFC and MMC. Just overall fell flat for me.

Thank you to the author for an ARC. All thoughts are my own. I read it in one sitting if that says anything. It was a fun and unique take on a possession. It had secret societies, medical themes, fun banter, and just all around interesting plot. If you enjoyed One Dark Window or Belladonna you’ll really enjoy this.

This book was so fun!!! A very different read for me but I really enjoyed it. I think the pacing in the first half was really good, and then it kind of dipped around the midpoint. I got a little confused by the end with all the characters. But still really fun and enjoyable. The romance was a nice added bonus.

I went into this book knowing it was going to crack me open and perform a surgical exorcism on all the broken parts of my soul. I knew it was going to mend me and shatter me with sentences that buried themselves in me and marked me as their home. The moment I read the dedication, the first sentence and the first chapters, it was like I was a scared little girl again holding Vivienne’s hand and fostering the silence that trapped her. I was Vivienne. A girl who couldn’t talk and was furious because of it. Looked at like a monster because I didn’t know how to handle it. To be completely honest, the moment I read the synopsis of this book, I knew it was going to be really hard to for me to read and make it through unscathed. But, as I’ve grown up and found a voice of my own, I’ve realized that voluntarily facing the hardest things, the most tragic things to your being, are what help you heal the most. I’ve said it before— and I’ll continue to say this as Kelly keeps writing her beautiful tragedies— that she is like my own personal therapist, forcing me to see it and fix my wounds myself. This little interconnected series has helped me heal my inner child and it shows in who I’ve become in the last few years compared to what my fears and anxieties and anger from and for other people did to me. Thank you, Kelly, I attribute so much of my growth to you. You helped me find my voice after so many years of wasting my screams to be heard.

With her gripping storytelling, dynamic characters, and suspenseful horror-inspired mysteries, Kelly Andrew’s books always hook me instantly—and this new angsty romantic read had me on the edge of my seat deciphering her cleverly placed clues of what could happen next.

Straight away, the story lures you in like a siren call. The eerie, ominous tone and quick pacing make this book easy to devour. With inspiration from dark fairy tales and mythology, I loved the setup of the entire mystery surrounding our main characters. I also adore how Andrew connects her books to her previous stories. It makes for a fun and dimensional reading experience.

As the story built and uncovered more, I found that some of the horror aspects weren’t for me as a reader. But by the end, Andrew still made my heart soar for these characters and their journey, and I can’t wait to see what she will write next!

3.5/5

*Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for sending me an eARC in exchange for an honest review.*

bodyguard/sign language interpreter in this Dark Academia tale by Kelly Andrew. 

Vivienne Farrow has a secret that no one outside of her family knows about - at night, she's dark and deadly, and the thing inside her is growing each day. Because of this, her stepfather decides to hire Thomas, a bodyguard/interpreter to keep her in check and to protect the family's secrets. 

I had a little trouble with the pacing of the story at the start and trying to figure out if Vivienne was just your regular vampire or something else. Note: it's something else. It was a bit dreary at the start watching Vivienne lash out at her family while trying to escape Thomas and form her own plans for how to deal with the monster living inside of her. 

This leads her to locating demon exorcists from a sort of secret society House to seek their help. And from there we start to see the action upon finding out more of Thomas's backstory and his own Brotherhood who are familiar with them and what they stand for. 

Once all the players have been revealed, we start to get a better understanding of just how dark and how far deep the secrets surrounding Vivienne and her condition really are. Honestly, I even felt that for all of his callousness in using Vivienne's dark abilities for his business, her stepfather was trying to protect her in his own ruthless way. 

A whole new group of characters are revealed halfway through the story - courtesy of Thomas, as he tries to save Vivienne from making the wrong decisions in dealing with what plagues her. I wish we had more backstory on Thomas's Brotherhood and the stories of the people that were backing him and helping Vivienne. 

Thanks to NetGalley and Scholastic for the ARC

Proper review after this but first I just want to say: this is not really a standalone, any more than Your Blood, My Bones was. Both are part of the same universe as The Whispering Dark, both feature characters from TWD, and moreover both require *knowledge* of TWD - its world, its characters, their powers/abilities - to make the deus ex machina endings make any sense or have any narrative satisfaction. It is doing both of these books a disservice not to mention their interconnected nature in marketing. I read all three in order and yet I'm still mad, a second time, that I feel like I was duped again. (Even though I think it's better integrated here than in YBMB.)

Anyway, I guess my real review here is - if you like ~*~vibes af~*~ horror-y/dark fantasy + romance, Kelly Andrew's books are here 4 u. Like the two preceding it, I Am Made of Death sometimes sacrifices narrative cohesion and, you know, plot throughlines for the sake of a <i>moment</i> - a visual, a line, just...a <i>vibe.</i> Which clearly is working for a lot of readers, but is a little hit or miss for me. Some cool stuff going on here with the idea of possession, and I do love the mutism element; plus Thomas and Vivienne are fun characters, as dramatic and intense as you could possibly hope for in a story like this. (Did I expect more ballet? Yes. That feels like something that was left on the cutting room floor, and it's a bit of a shame, but that's such a tiny nitpick, really.) But it's a fun read in many ways, and Kelly Andrew really does nail the vibes every time. I just hope her next book truly stands on its own (or admits the series situation upfront), and has an ending that feels earned and belonging to this book itself.

Thank you to the publisher for the advance copy in exchange for an honest review.

Another haunting story from Kelly Andrew, this one filled with all forms of demons, writing that has no right being so pretty when it's about such dark things, and an agonizing love story. If you enjoyed her other books, definitely pick up this one, because each one gets better and better, in my opinion.

A huge thank you to Scholastic and NetGalley for the review copy in exchange for an honest review!

I have been a massive fan of Kelly Andrew's work since I first read THE WHISPERING DARK in 2023. The way she ties her disability and life experience into her books is really impactful to readers that might also be going through something similar. Generally I'm not a huge fan of body horror, but the way Kelly writes often makes me forget my fear for a second because I'm so engrossed in the story. I AM MADE OF DEATH was no different for me.

Despite this being a stand-alone book, you can tell it's still set in the same world as TWD and YBMB which I thought was nice. I love a good series of interconnected stand-alones—especially when my favorite characters make a cameo (looking at you Lane and Colton). Things that were set up in book one came more or less full circle here. Which means I'd recommend starting with THE WHISPERING DARK and ending with I AM MADE OF DEATH. That way you don't miss anything with the Easter eggs/cameos.

That said, I love the way Andrew really paints us a picture with her imagery. It's almost like we're right there with the characters going through everything with them. Which, let's be real, I don't think I'd survive in this book. 1. I yap way too much, 2. I can't fight for anything, so one punch and I'd probably be down for the count (unless I surprise myself, who knows), and 3. Thomas would have swept me off my feet immediately (though not as immediately as Colton or Pedyr—she really knows how to write a male love interest).

Thomas was an instant hit for me. Vivienne took a little to grow on me, but after learning her story and why she acted the way she did made me love her all the more. I can't imagine living with some sort of Eldritch horror inside of me. I don't think I'd have made it nearly as long as she did. Not when it felt like my insides weren't my own. But it makes sense as to why she tried pushing Thomas away; she didn't want to hurt him more than she had to. I also want to point out that the secret societies interwoven through these books is *chef's kiss*. Very Buffy. Very dark academia. VERY up my alley.

Overall, this was an absolute hit for me. It's a princess x bodyguard romance with a large dash of Eldritch horror. Andrew is the queer of lyric gothic prose and I will continue to scream about them until everyone I know reads them. Did I mention there's also two absolutely precious Dobermans that nothing bad happens to? No? Well there are. Molly and Judd are the real heroes here, lets be honest.

At this point I might as well give Kelly my credit card, three books and three absolute hits!!!!!!

This is my favorite Kelly Andrew book yet (I've said this after each one I've read) but this really hit it out of the park. From the first page I was sat ready to see what would happen next with Thomas and Vivienne. This book drags you right into the action and keeps you on the edge of your seat as you wait to figure out what is going on with Vivienne and what Thomas was brought to the Farrow house to help stop. Kelly has a way of creating such lovable characters that I am also slightly afraid of and I eat it up each time!!!!!!!

Bubblegum horror, body horror, possession, medical horror, and the type of yearning we need to bring back this book actually has everything. While this is a stand alone, I would highly highly recommend (re)reading The Whispering Dark before starting I Am Made of Death, it deals very heavily with world building you learn in TWD and expands on it in such a great way.

Thomas and Vivienne are actually my children!!!!

Very interesting book. I don’t really know how to classify it: mystery, suspense, supernatural, horror, coming of age, young adult.
Vivian is a troubled young woman that hides her issues well. Thomas is struggling to find his place in the world and gets hired as her interpreter as Vivian is mute and only signs.
Together they try and figure out the mysteries haunting her and start to form a relationship of sorts.
I enjoyed all the characters and felt that the author did a great job pulling you into the story. I felt really invested in the characters and kept wondering how it would all work out. Would it be a happy ending, or not? I really wasn’t sure, but the ending definitely fit the theme.

Kelly Andrew’s YA fantasy is an exciting horror story that follows Vivienne, a mute FMC, and Thomas, the person tasked to translate for her. This was my first foray into a story that portrays sign language on the page and I loved it! More books with this please. Most characters either understood sign or could sign themselves which made what would have been a somewhat generic love story far more interesting.

Vivienne’s slow decline into the monster she is struggling to destroy is beautifully written, yet it feels as if necessary exposition and development is happening off page. Wonderful characters are added to the story as it progresses, but the additions are clunky and the reader is left wondering if they missed key scenes. Many answers are left for the reader to assumes or conclude on their own, which is fun as an adult reader, but the romance doesn’t match the maturity of the rest of the plot. It’s almost as if the love story is written for middle schoolers, with many of the scenes feeling overly dramatic, while the rest of the novel is for NA readers. Don’t get me wrong, I love when YA writers don’t underestimate their audiences, but this felt disconnected.

There is still a lot to like in this book. The banter is fun, the communication is interesting, and the conflict between Vivienne and her mother is complicated. I certainly enjoyed reading it and think others would too.

Favorite character: Reed and/or Thomas’ sister
Favorite dynamic: Lane and Colton, I want so much more of their story!