A thought-provoking and poignant exploration of life, relationships, and the passage of time. The author’s prose is reflective, capturing the complexities of human emotions with subtlety and depth. The author excels in portraying the nuances of everyday life, making the characters' experiences feel both universal and deeply personal. It reflects on the choices we make in life over time.

A thought provoking read. Maybe the the true American story? A life of disappointment, striving for more, the desire to find oneself?

When Tom’s wife cheats on him, he resolves to leave her once his youngest child leaves home. After he discovers that she has had an affair, they agree to stay together for the children and until their daughter Miriam turns eighteen years of age. That time has now arrived as he drives his daughter Miri across America to university, then continues driving and decides to look up friends and family from his past.

It is an impulse, snap decision and a really engaging moment in the book - he just keeps on driving. We sense that Tom , the main character, feels like he is on the cusp of change in several ways, after issues with his job he is now on leave, there is a mysterious and persistent health issue which evryone tells him he should get checked out. This spontaneous trip provides a turning point for what he really wants from the rest of his life.

The book is split into three parts with no chapters and reads like a stream of consciousness. the pacing starts quite slow, sometimes it can feel "rambling" as it is a stream of consciousness which includes lots of menial details - which mauybe makes the character's plight feel more authentic. It's a moving read, definitely thought proviking an incites you to think about your own life's curveballs, and how you would handle the same scenario.

I hadn’t heard of Benjamin Markovits before but I was intrigued by the blurb, so I applied to read it. This book won’t turn your world upside down but it is a lovely story, with very believable characters, and plausible situations – although if someone had Tom, our narrator’s symptoms, one would hope they would go to a hospital sooner.

Tom is married to Amy. They have 2 beautiful children – first Michael, then Miriam (Miri). When Michael is young and Miri is tiny, Amy has an affair. They carry on, so as to keep the home together for the children, but Tom decides that when Miri leaves home, he will leave. Amy suspects and is just waiting for something to happen, so the marriage is not a comfortable one. However, they muddle along. When Miri goes to University Tom drives her. When he drops her off, he just decides to carry on driving – to see various old friends, and ultimately to stay with their son Michael. Unfortunately, the trip doesn’t quite go as planned, and Tom and Amy are forced to evaluate what is really important.

I really enjoyed the book, but I felt the ending was a bit rushed and not very satisfying. Otherwise I would have given it 5 stars.

https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/7347221313
https://maddybooksblog.blogspot.com/2025/03/the-rest-of-our-lives-by-benjamin.html

Thank you NetGalley and Faber and Faber Ltd for this eCopy to review

Benjamin Markovits' The Rest of Our Lives is a quietly powerful novel that resonated with me long after I turned the last page. Cantered on the life of Tom Layward, the story begins with a significant milestone: dropping his daughter off at university. This bittersweet moment serves as the springboard for a journey—both literal and metaphorical—that takes Tom across America and into the depths of his memories.

As Tom navigates the open roads, we are introduced to fragments of his past: old friends, former flames, and pivotal moments that shaped the man he is today. Alongside these encounters, Tom confronts pressing issues in the present, including his health, aging, and the complexities of his marriage. The road trip becomes a canvas for reflection, as he grapples with choices he made and the life he has built.

What struck me most was the novel’s pacing—it mirrors the rhythm of life itself, with moments of quiet contemplation interrupted by bursts of emotional intensity. Markovits does an exceptional job of capturing the nuances of middle age, balancing humour with poignancy. Tom’s internal dialogue feels authentic, making it easy to empathize with his journey of self-discovery.

While the novel's introspective tone might not suit everyone, I found it deeply rewarding. The interplay between past and present is skilfully woven, and the landscapes described evoke a sense of wanderlust that complements Tom’s personal exploration.

The Rest of Our Lives is a thought-provoking and beautifully written meditation on family, identity, and the roads we take—both figuratively and literally.

‘The Rest of Our Lives’ is a novel about people, family and how events from the past can help form our future. It’s also a great read which I’m sure will sweep you along with Tom, the lead character, as he traverses the country in search of himself.
Thoroughly recommend.

Toms wife had an affair. he vowed to leave her when his daughter finally left home. and so 12 years later when this day comes about, he drops her at university and just keeps driving. where to? why? with no clear plan or destination in mind he does have people to visit along the way. there is also his health issues. is he running? is he running to? is he just avoiding his wife and the decision he is now forced to decide upon having made the pact with himself all those years ago? leaving would be hard. but staying with somone who betrayed you completely?
i felt everything and all the things in this book. i felt too much! i was finding myself emotional just by the writing style. it seemed to flow and infiltrate your waking hours. having you thinking or feeling about it whether the book is in your hands or not.
it was seamless writing for me.
the added layer of not knowing what was wrong with Tom until the end was both good and bad. because i wanted to help him make the decisions based on what level of "ill" he was. and i wondered how this might dictate what he was doing or going to do. because was he saying goodbye? or just avoiding his wife and health issues?
a wonderful book. i could recommend it more.
one you will want in proper copy to sit on your bookshelf forever.

I failed to finish this book I’m afraid. Although I was invested in the characters to an extent, they, the slow development of the story and the grammar/typo errors throughout were becoming increasingly annoying. In the end I felt I was wasting my time reading something I was not enjoying, sorry!

The Rest of Our Lives illustrates the stark reality of the romantic notion of “till death do us part”. Empty houses, dissatisfaction, infidelity and chronic illness are all tackled in this book that isn’t really about any one thing in particular.

The book is split into three parts with no chapters and reads like a stream of consciousness. An easy read that was interestingly written.

Thank you NetGalley and Faber and Faber for providing an advanced copy for review.

This was a mediocre read for me but I’m glad to have read it as it had a few interesting moments.

This is a quiet, introspective story that delves into midlife crises, marriage, and the weight of past decisions told from the perspective of a middle-aged man.

The story explores themes of regret, identity, and the search for meaning in the later stages of life.

The writing style is subtle and immersive, and the events happening are emotionally nuanced.

The protagonist is not always a likeable character, but he is deeply human, making him a relatable person.

The narrative is rich in introspection but it’s slow-paced and meandering making it feel aimless at times.

This is a thoughtful, character-driven exploration of aging and self-reflection. While its quiet nature may not suit everyone, readers who appreciate deeply personal, literary fiction will find much to admire but those looking for a more plot-driven novel may find it difficult to stay engaged.

When Tom Layward's wife had an affair he resolved to leave her as soon as his youngest daughter turned eighteen. Twelve years later, while driving her to Pittsburgh to start university, he remembers his pact. He is also on the run from his own health issues, and the fact that he's been put on leave at work after students complained about the politics of his law class - something he hasn't yet told his wife.

I did not gel well with this book at all. I struggled to see any direction and plot?? I was very confused for quite a lot of it because I just felt no connection to the characters at all because we just jumped straight into the world of these people, without much context. I felt like it dragged on longer than necessary.

I rated this 2 stars.

We find ourselves thrown into a moving snapshot of family man Tom’s life, at pivotal moment of change. The
motion never stops, by way of an unexpectedly length car journey, running, swimming and fluid relationships. And the motion will go on long after we leave Tom, at yet another pivotal moment of change in his life.

A very American book, not entirely to my taste, I have to admit to failing to understand parts of this book.
The parts that I understood were good, but didn't seem to me to fit togetehr all of that well.
If the reader likes reading about American life and understands what we Brits would call 'Americanisms' they may well love this book.
I don't watch. like or understand Basketball which appears to take up a lot of the book.
The ending is kept open, again not something to my taste.
I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.

A Middle aged couple face their daughter’s starting college as a turning point in their lives. He has waited twelve years to make the decision to leave after his wife’s short affair, and which she knows will leave her with the prospect of an empty house. After dropping his daughter at college, Tom keeps on driving perhaps on a journey of discovery or to put off the decision. His life has come to a crossroads with work on hold and a question mark hanging over his health, as he makes visits to people from his past. He seems incapable of making any proper decision, and we are along for the ride. I found some of the references too specific to American life, and many sporting details uninteresting to me, but I was rooting for him when the inevitable crash happens.

The premise of the story is a hook to pull you in- a midlife crisis played out on a road trip as Tom seems to struggle with both empty nest syndrome and his wife's infidelity. However for me this book crawled along and dwelled in all the wrong places. There are glimmers of exquisite story telling but those moments for me were lost in the quagmire of rambling disjointed thoughts from Tom.
Sadly not for me on this occasion.

I requested this book on NetGalley because it sounded really interesting but unfortunately, I had to DNF this book.
Perhaps I'm not the target audience. The story starts off really slowly - too slowly - and then Tom, the main character, tells us how his wife has an affair with a man in their community, but he decides not to leave her until his youngest leaves for college.

We then go through the build up of Tom's daughter, Miri, getting ready for college. The family arguments, saying goodbye to friends, attending parties and so on. Unfortunately, none of this feels relevant and it is quite hard to follow because it feels like Tom is rambling about his thoughts on his life, rather than trying to share a story.

IF you don't mind rambling characters, monologues or other similar styles of writing, I'm sure this could be appreciated. However, it simply isn't for me and I felt I couldn't read further than 40 pages.

I'd like to thank NetGalley for this ARC in exchange for an honest review and wish the author every success with this book!

Centred around Tom and his family, this book explores themes of relationships, separation and family dynamics.

Once their younger daughter Miri leaves, Tom realises he too wants to leave his wife. So when dropping Miri off, he doesn’t go straight home, instead he revisits people from his earlier life and relationships.

Whilst the subject of the book is an emotional one, leading to a health revelation at the end (which felt inevitable from the start), it didn’t feel like it grabbed me and made me want to continually read in the way I expected.

I struggled to get into this story, I found myself dipping in and out of the book rather than wanting to keep reading on.

Thanks to Faber and NetGalley for providing early access to this book.

The long littleness of life, and the search to find meaning again 4.5

This is a beautifully written account of a middle-aged man’s loss and disappointment. Tom married Amy, a woman he felt was somewhat ‘out of his league’. They had two children, a son and a daughter. When the daughter, the youngest, was six, Amy had an affair. The couple have stayed together, ‘for the sake of the children’ superficially managing a kind of pedestrian harmony, but Tom has always said he would leave when his daughter turned 18.

The book begins on the eve of Miri about to go off to college. Mother and daughter have a difficult relationship, and Amy and Tom are now facing ‘empty nest syndrome’ and a relationship which is disappointing for both.

Tom is honourable, but has a certain passivity, a certain awareness of never quite having got where he wanted to get, nor a strong sense of where that might have been. At one point his dream had been to write a kind of road trip book about amateur basketball pitchers, a kind of view of America.

Somehow, without knowing quite how this happened, this begins, as he picks up the pieces of making contact with old friends, old colleagues, his own younger brother.

The book inhabits a melancholy place, tender and drifting, confused and yet with a kind of yearning of the heart, for something, the glimmer of enchantment and meaning. In some way I was reminded of Fournier’s Le Grand Meaulnes, that romantic desire for intense revelation and understanding, something gone.

This is a wonderful book, with a perfect ending which continues the unanswered questions, the lack of cut and dried resolutions which is the particular emotional tone of the book.

My only reason for that missing half star is that the basketball stuff was such a complete and incomprehensible foreign language to me, lacking that cultural connection or interest!

Tom is married to Amy and they have two children, Michael and Miri. When Miri was small Amy had an affair which Tom knew about. At the time he tells himself that he will leave when Miri goes to college. When Miri eventually goes Tom drives her there on his own and then instead of returning home to Amy he keeps on driving, staying at friends’ houses on the way until he gets to where Michael lives in California. I did not really enjoy this book. I felt it was just Tom’s thoughts with very little happening and I actually found it quite depressing. Thanks to NetGalley for allowing me an ARC of this book.

I have mixed feelings about this one (not necessarily a bad thing). The description was intriguing, the story clever, but the delivery missed the mark for me. It was slow to get into and from there I struggled to connect with any emotional impact. I did find it ended satisfyingly. Thanks Netgalley and the publisher.

It didn't live up to my expectations.
This book is effectively a monologuevoiced by Tom, who is married to Amy. When the youngest of their two children, Miriam, was six, he found out Amy had been having an affair. They remained together, but he secretly vowed that when Miri was old enough to move away from home, he would leave Amy. On the day that he was taking Miri to start at Univerity, he decided he wouldn't return home. Instead, he starts a drive across the US to visit his mother in California. On the way, he sees several people from his past and takes in some basketball games as he is a big fan of NBA. What becomes clear during his journey is that he is suffering from an illness that is progressively worsening that he has not told the family about.
I found the delivery in the book was very flat, with little change of pace and not much excitement. This surprised me as author Benjamin Markovits teaches creative writing at a London Univerity. Frankly, from this pedigree, I expected a lot more. At times, I was at a loss as to what he intended. Tom's vulnerability comes through throughout the story, and it does ellicit some sympathy.
This book isn't one for me, but I can see that the introspection it induces could appeal to some readers.