I was so excited to read this because the premise is so good, but it unfortunately misses a lot in its execution. I tend to really hate comparisons in the summary and this one is one of the most egregious - there's nothing of either The Pairing or Mr. and Mrs. Smith in this, aside from that they're spies and it's kind-of-sort-of-I-guess a second chance romance? The pull of Mr. and Mrs. Smith is them being on opposite sides, which they're not, and the pull of the Pairing is the food, travel, and bet/second-chance romance. KC and Yardley are barely even broken up when they learn each other's identities (a situation that is truly convoluted, along with how they managed to be working for the CIA on similar missions without knowing each other was also working for the CIA), so it's much less a second-chance than keeping the relationship going with the new information.

The whole spy thing also manages to be really uncomfortable, with a really thick layer of patriotism over everything and everyone's reasons for working for the CIA or wanting to be a spy, along with the situations being the most cliche of the Hollywood cliches while trying to convince you they're being grounded and realistic. There was just so much "it's fine, it was all a sacrifice for the country she loved" and it made my skin crawl every time.

The writing is another place where this really suffers, mostly in convoluted similes and dialogue that is working off of a base assumption that everyone's on the same page in terms of humor but instead comes off like tumblr "and then everyone clapped" posts. It just meant I never got to just enjoy the story or the characters and kept getting thrown out of it.

If you inhale espionage, read this book. It's a classic tale of betrayal, world traveling, dire stakes, and getting there just in the nick of time. If you wish your tales of espionage focused on a queer cohort, this will be EXACTLY what you want. No one's queer identity is the focus of this story. Everyone involved is out, partnered, living their life. I think seeing queer humans living their lives is a hugely important thing in story telling right now.

Yardley and KC have buried their relationship underneath their own secrets. Each of them work for the CIA, Yardley as an operative and KC in tech. For "some reason" they were never given permission to reveal their status to the other, even though they live together. Not to go off topic, but a large part of the larger plot in this story is that the systems in place are easy to exploit, and having a diverse group of humans looking as the system is the way to build a better one.

The spy stuff felt compelling, but standard. There's a villain. There's a threat to the world as we know it. The search takes these two all over the world. There are disguises, chases, fights, and failures. All on the path to the end. I don't read a ton of spy stuff, so I can't really judge it. I did enjoy it. While there were many moving pieces, I was able to follow along.

These two women....There was a lot of....angst. Yardley mentions needing a moor with which to properly express her devastation over the demise of her relationship. The angst overshadowed their professionalism. Many a time. It actually made me feel like they weren't as good at their jobs the more I read. Specifically Yardley. She's supposed to be "the Unicorn." She has a stellar reputation, but the minute KC gets involved, she makes rash decisions. She loses her cool. Loses her perspective. (And she and KC banter about how KC is stronger and more fit than Yardley.) It diminishes the skill and accomplishments she has as an operative to me.

It's also a slow burn. I get that. Slow burn makes sense for a relationship that needs to be rebuilt from the ground up, but when they finally give in to each other it's in the middle of a mission. In a public place. It felt so...inappropriate and unprofessional. What the heck! These are two elite operatives. They know better than to f*ck when there are people actively looking for them. Why on earth is that the logical next step?

Overall, this isn't a bad book. It's not poorly written, though the chapters are really long. It felt boring at times, and I continued not to agree with the decisions these two made throughout this mission.

3.25/5 rounded down

Thank you St. Martin's Griffin for the advanced reading copy!

I'm really not sure how I feel about this one, even a few days after finishing. I liked this one immediately, but then it lost me and never quite got me back. For starters, I think it was too long, with most of the action and fun in the first half, with the second half kind of dragging.

There were great, sweet and spicy moments between Yardley & KC, and some moments where I was very confused about their overall vibe.

Honestly, this book was almoooost so good, and I just can't quite put my finger on what was wrong with it. The pacing was a bit off, and it felt very stream-of-consciousness in a way that just didn't work for me. I'd try this author again, but cautiously.

*Received as a free ARC*
I'm not actually convinced I like spy novels. I think they're better as movies for me. However, as a kid, this book would never have existed so I had to give it a try. That being said, it rallied for me in the second half. KC and Yardley both came into their own and there was a satisfactory ending for both the action movie plot and the romance plot. Would recommend to queer contemporary romance enjoyers.

I appreciate the opportunity to read this title, but unfortunately it didn’t quite capture my interest. While the premise was promising, I found it difficult to stay engaged. That said, I’m sure it will find its audience with readers who connect more strongly with the writing style or pacing.

3.25/5 stars

Thank you St. Martin’s Griffin and NetGalley for the ARC!

If I Told You, I'd Have to Kiss You is a sapphic spy romance where ex-girlfriends Yardley and KC have to navigate finding out that they’re coworkers. Spy coworkers.
I was looking forward to this so much. A spy novel? A queer spy novel?
Regrettably, the best part of this book was Gramercy and Atlas. I would’ve liked more of Atlas because they really got ignored for most of the book, but I will take an entire novel from Gramercy’s POV. Give me a sassy, middle-aged spy handler any day.
Now, for the negatives. Despite loving spy/espionage stuff… this book had a little too much of it. The pacing is so, so slow because we spend entire chapters talking in circles to figure out the plan.
Also, the action sequences were super confusing. I had no idea what was happening or why, which is not good in a novel full of fight scenes and dramatic escapes.
And, the most upsetting part, I did not care at all about these characters. KC and Yardley were both super flat, and there were zero stakes to their relationship. I wish we could’ve seen a few scenes before they broke up so we had something to root for, but I didn’t have that.

CW: sexual content; violence; abandonment

*Thank you to NetGalley for providing this eARC*

I was hooked on this story from the start! We follow Yardley and KC, a broken up couple, as they discover they’re both in the same line of work— which just so happens to be the CIA. Yes, that CIA— not only did they just discover they’re both spies, but they’re also on the same mission.

This second chance romance is well written and fast paced. There is plenty of spy-action as well as spicy scenes that were well done and left me wanting more in a good way! I think my favorite part of this book is that the characters are well developed and go through some good revelations while figuring out the mission as well as their relationship. I knew this would be a 5-star book a few chapters in, and it only kept getting better as I read it! I can’t wait to dive into some of the other works by the authors.

Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for an advanced reader copy

If I Told You, I'd Have to Kiss You by Mae Marvel is a third person dual-POV second chance contemporary Sapphic romance in the vein or Mr. and Mrs. Smith. KC and Yardley, aka Tabasco and the Unicorn, have broken-up and are still in love despite all of their struggles while they were together. When they find out that not only were they both hiding their real jobs at the CIA from each other but that they will now be on a mission together, it’s the perfect chance for them to finally make their relationship work.

This is on the spicier side with several scenes that I would rate about a 2.5. There’s maybe a smidge of kink but not a lot nor does this lean into erotica. KC and Yardley have a hard time being honest with themselves and each other and the physical aspects of their relationship seem to be one of the main ways for them to express their feelings for each other without getting into emotional vulnerability or intimacy. It is fun to see them struggle with their new status quo but also keeping their hands to themselves.

Yardley’s grandfather was a spy and she has a wealth of relationship advice from both of her grandparents regarding how hard it is to have a relationship when this giant secret is between you. If anything, I think this does make it more tragic how much Yardley is still pining for KC in the opening because she knew this was a possibility and it makes their happily ever after more satisfying. KC doesn’t have these same reference points in her family history, but she did struggle with keeping things to herself because she wanted to be with Yardley.

I would recommend this to fans of Mr. and Mrs. Smith who want a Sapphic spin and readers of second chance romance who like some action in their books

Yardley and KC have just broken up after 3 years of being together/living together. Turns out, maybe things hadn’t worked out because they were keeping some major secrets from each other. 😱

This was really fun. Two spies/recent ex-girlfriends, who had no idea the other one was also a spy in the same organization, and now they *get* to work together.

Right from the beginning, you could tell those feelings that brought them together in the first place were still strong, there was just *something* keeping them apart, and once the truth gets out, and they can finally communicate. 🥹

There were some cute moments, some sweet moments, some spicy moments, and even some action! Definitely a fun read!

If I Told You, I’d Have to Kiss You by Mae Marvel is an action-adventure lesbian romance.

Yardley Whitmer is a field agent for the CIA. Unbeknownst to her, her soon to be ex KC Nolan is a computer expert for the CIA. (seriously, how can two high level agents not realize their significant other is a spy?!) For Yardley’s next high stakes assignment, she and KC will be working together. Will they find a way to save their relationship with danger lurking around every corner?

If I Told You, I’d Have to Kiss You is an adrenaline-fueled romance. Yardley, KC, and the secondary characters are realistically portrayed and easy to like. Yardley and KC have plenty of chemistry but keeping secrets from each other has taken its toll. The storyline is engaging but the non-stop spy capers overshadow the romance aspect of the plot. Mae Marvel brings this zany romance to a satisfying conclusion.

dnf at 20% unfortunately I just could not get into this book. I was really expecting to like it and as much as I tried to push through it I couldn't enjoy it.

If I Told You, I’d Have to Kiss You is a magnetic fusion of espionage and romance, effortlessly balancing heart-pounding thrills with swoon-worthy moments. The writing is sharp, clever, and full of personality; it's light on its feet but grounded in emotional depth. The dialogue snaps with wit and charm, and the vivid, cinematic descriptions make every scene easy to picture. There’s a precision to the prose that brings the world to life and keeps the pace tight, making it nearly impossible to put down.

The romance between KC and Yardley is the heart of the story and easily my favorite part. Their relationship is a tangled blend of deep affection and carefully guarded secrets, and when their true identities finally come to light, everything shifts. The love was never in question, it was the trust that faltered. Watching them slowly, vulnerably rebuild that trust over the course of the novel was both powerful and deeply rewarding.

In the end, If I Told You, I’d Have to Kiss You delivers a thrilling, heartfelt ride that’s as much about love and identity as it is about secrets and spycraft. With sharp writing, vivid characters, and a romance that lingers long after the final page, it’s the kind of story that sticks with you in all the best ways.

I always love a good spy book, and this one had great heroines, a hot second chance romance, and an overall great plotline. It really felt like watching a whole spy action movie, except it was a book and the majority of the characters in this book were not straight (finally).

Overall, this book was a very enjoyable read. The romance was a bit unique, because they had only just broken up when the book kicks off, so it sort of feels like they were just taking a break and picked back up once they get into the book and their identities are revealed, which was interesting. Speaking of, I loved how the author created all the backstories for their covers and even their spy personas, and used that to really give the romance a second chance as they explore what caused their relationship to implode.

Thank you to St. Martins Press and NetGalley for the ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Thanks to NetGalley for access to a copy for review.

I had a hard time with this one. I was exceedingly annoyed with the opening because of real-world geo-political realities that I know could not have been a twinkle in the eye of the authors when this was written. The technology is a MacGuffin in that it lacks any link to how physics work. And the idea that they both with the same people and have done for years and everyone else knows and somehow it was kept secret from the two of them is possibly even more non-sensical than the technology.

Had I not been reading this as an ARC I would have quit after chapter 2. Maybe 3. But! Yardley and KC are both wonderful and they are working on their relationship in the middle of their mission and that's the bit the matters in a Romance. It's about two women who found themselves in a very weird situation and had to find their path to each other. And at this, If I Told You, I'd Have to Kiss You shines.

For people who don't need their spy stores to feel real. Just romance reasons.

Unfortunately this one is a DNF for me at 20%. The premise was great but I didn’t feel any connection to the story or characters, nor did I feel like they had much of a connection with each other either. It was such a slow build and once I started to feel like reading it was tedious, I just couldn’t spend any more time on it. I think it will work for some people, especially those who are more into spy novels, but I’m a romance girl at heart and in that regard, it fell flat. 2 stars for the portion I did read.

Sapphic Spies. Sapphic Spies! SAPPHIC SPIES!

Yardley and KC’s relationship is pretty much over. Except for the fact that they’re still in love with each other. Except for the fact that they’ve both been working as spies. In this sapphic Mr and Mrs Smith-esque story, near exes are forced to join forces for the sake of the nation... and maybe a couple of kisses.

I thought this one was so fun! Romance, drama, and laughter - this one has all of it. If you’re looking for an adrenaline-filled romp with spies who can’t keep their eyes off of each other, this one is for you!

(Also, I’d fold so quickly if I ever had to play their version of 20 questions because phewwwwwwwww 😩🔥😮‍💨)

If I Told You, I’d Have to Kiss You comes out June 10th!

Thank you to St Martin’s Griffin and NetGalley for this eARC.

I really wanted to adore this sapphic spin on Mr. and Mrs. Smith, but the pacing DRAGS. The internal and external dialogue are exhaustingly repetitive (you could cut out two-thirds of the first half and still get the gist).

This story was such a wild ride! I’ve not read any spy novels before and this was a great one to start with! The whole story was fast paced with a range of emotions attached. From being bummed for the characters breaking up, to intrigue by the whole spy profession, to loving love and the way some of the side characters describe it, to satisfaction at solving the mystery and a happy ending, I really enjoyed reading Yardley and KC’s story.

Do you like Mr. and Mrs. Smith? Do you like sapphic love stories? Then look no further than If I Told You, I'd Have to Kiss You, by Mae Marvel!

All you had to say was sapphic Mr. and Mrs. Smith to get me to read this book! I loved everyone moment of the story about Yardley and KC finding out they're both spies working for the same organization! Please don't go into this book looking for an accurate portrayal of spy-craft or the CIA. Instead go into with fun and humor and you'll find a well written book that keeps you turning page after page to see what happens!

3.5 Stars!

Knowing that If I Told You, I'd Have to Kiss You is a sapphic Mr. & Mrs. Smith is all I need to fangirl over this book on an extreme level!

I was completely captivated by the magnetic romance in this story, and the whole Mr. and Mrs. Smith-style (a big fan of that movie) espionage angle was such a blast to read. Admittedly, the middle section did lean a bit too heavily on clichés, feeling a touch repetitive. But don’t let that deter you — the electric chemistry between the two main characters and thrilling twists more than make up for it, keeping you riveted until the last page!