Skip to main content

Member Reviews

3.5 stars

Ms. and Ms. Smith? Sign me up! Between the synopsis and the cover -- and even the tongue-in-cheek title -- I had such high hopes for this.

Unfortunately, it didn't deliver.

First, the plot twists were obvious. While the stakes for this spy plot were very high (world-crippling), it felt easy and uncomplicated. There were parts of the plot that felt interesting and well done but on the whole, I've read better. I'm a big fan of genre mash-ups and I've read an excellent romance/action hybrid recently so my expectations were probably higher than most readers'.

Second, it felt too long. It's a very slow book and that's the kiss of death for a spy plot. There was too much downtime between the action-y bits which left me with the impression that I'm stuck in stop and go traffic. I don't think the two genres were blended smoothly.

Third, I struggled to connect with the characters. Are they awesome, badass women? Yes! Was I invested in their romantic drama? Not really. We meet them in the midst of a break-up so it's kind of a second chance romance. But there was too much introspection and inner monologuing for me. After a while, it just got repetitive and boring.

I know people who loved it and I know people who disliked it. I'd probably recommend this to very specific readers but it's not high on my list.

<i>Many thanks to NetGalley, St Martin's Griffin, and the author for providing a copy in exchange for an honest review.</i>

Was this review helpful?

DNF @ 30%, the concept sounded interesting but I couldn't get into the story or the characters. I might try it again as an audiobook

Was this review helpful?

Thank you to Netgalley and St. Martin’s Publishing Group for this ARC edition!

If I Told You, I’d Have to Kiss You is a heartwarming, dangerous and sexy good time. This spy novel has so much heart and made me believe that with trust, anything is possible, even seemingly irreparable wounds. I was giggling and swooning right along with KC and Yardley. This was a great spy adventure and a beautiful love story! I thoroughly enjoyed my time with our dashing heroines. Never a dull moment with these two on the job!

Was this review helpful?

DNF at 30%

Probably for some, but not for me. I struggled to really get into the story or feel connected to the characters. I think it was too long, and the pacing felt off. The spy and romance plots felt a bit disjointed, so it didn't feel super cohesive.

Thank you to NetGalley for this eARC in exchange for an honest review!

Was this review helpful?

dnf’d at 24%. this just wasn’t for me. i didn’t feel drawn to the story, characters, or the writing. it felt clunky and didn’t flow well.

thank you to st. martin’s press for this arc in exchange for an honest review! all opinions are my own :)

Was this review helpful?

Overall Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️.75
Spice: 🌶

This story follows KC and Yardley as they navigate their rocky relationship and demanding careers. Little do they know, they work for the same company as spies. This book is action packed and full of strong emotional moments. If you are looking for a quick read that keeps you on your toes. Then check this lovely book out!

Was this review helpful?

This one dragged a little bit for me, for s book about spies there was too much internal monologue.
But I did love KC, I really wanted to hug her and promised everything would be alright.
Thanks to Netgalley for a copy of this ARC.

Was this review helpful?

Many thanks to NetGalley for the EARC, I was very excited for this sapphic romance about a spy! Honestly this is more of a 3.5 stars for me but I didn’t expect a spy romance to hit me in the feelings this hard. If I Told You, I'd Have to Kiss You is like if Mr. & Mrs. Smith had real emotional stakes and were also two brilliant, complicated queer women. Yardley “Unicorn” Whitmer and KC “Tabasco” Nolan are top-tier CIA agents who had no idea they were working in the same agency—because they’re also exes who broke up over secrets they couldn’t share. When a mission forces the truth out, sparks (and bullets) fly.

Yardley completely stole my heart. She’s a Southern debutante who can sweet-talk a diplomat or dismantle a bomb—sometimes in the same scene. And KC? She’s a tech genius who keeps thinking she’s "just a hacker," but she’s so much more than that. The way these two balance each other is pure magic. Their chemistry is undeniable, but it’s the emotional honesty that got me. Their slow, careful rebuild of trust felt so real—messy, complicated, and totally worth rooting for.

The plot is classic spy-thriller (stolen weapon, globe-trotting missions, coded messages), but what makes it shine is how personal everything feels. Every mission beat ties back to their relationship. There’s action, yes, but also quiet moments—holding hands in a hallway, sharing a look across a room—that hit just as hard.

I stayed up late for this one, not because the twists were shocking, but because I cared—about these women, their history, and whether they’d find their way back to each other.

If you love stories where queer women get to be badass and vulnerable, where romance and action actually enhance each other, this one’s a gem. It’s sexy, sharp, and surprisingly heartfelt. I already want a sequel.

Was this review helpful?

Had to DNF this one about 40% in. It just wasn’t for me. It was kinda boring and I didn’t really buy the storyline as much as I hoped. The sapphic spy storyline was so intriguing to me which is why I picked this up at first but unfortunately it just fell flat for me.

Was this review helpful?

the idea? chef's kiss. the execution, however, fell flat. thsts not to say that rhe book won't work for others, but i found KC and Yardley to be undeveloped in a way that adults shouldn't be. i unfortunately had to DNF around 50%.

Was this review helpful?

Spice Level: 1/5 Open / Closed Door

Yardley Whitmer, aka “The Unicorn,” is a CIA agent who has as many accents as she does wigs to provide cover. As successful as she has been in her “spy” career, she has equally failed in her personal life.

KC Nolan, aka “Tobasco,” is a CIA hacker AND tech guru who moonlights as a coder / developer. Just like Yardley, she has been successful in her “spy” career, but has equally failed in her personal life.

Another thing they have in common is that they have no idea what each other’s day job is and their secrets are what’s causing their relationship failures, even though they do have love for each other. Chance would have it that KC puts herself on the line to save Yardley from a sticky situation. Only, they learn at that time that they’ve been working together in the CIA. This dangerous situation leads to them trekking around Europe trying to stop a computer virus that could wreck a lot of infrastructure.

I “read” this as an audiobook. I definitely want to give credit to the narrator, Mia Hutchison-Shaw for the voicework on this audiobook. While reading, she swapped between different accents for the characters. Managing one, I imagine, is difficult enough, but at least 3 and sometimes two during one scene. Massive credit!!

The premise of the story was intriguing for me as I hadn’t come across many spy type books in the sapphic genre. That really gravitated me towards this story. I enjoyed the twists and turns that this book provided. I also really enjoyed the way that Yardley and KC were able to discover the love that they once held (and still do) for each other while trying to stop the havoc.

Was this review helpful?

Thank you to @netgalley and @stmartinspress for a free copy of this book in exchange for my honest review. And thank you to @macmillan.audio for a free download of the audiobook.

If I Told You, I’d Have to Kiss You has such a fun and promising premise—sapphic spies, secret identities, and a mission gone sideways? I was immediately intrigued by the concept, the title, and the vibrant cover.

Unfortunately, the execution didn’t quite live up to its potential. While the setup was exciting, I struggled to connect with Yardley and KC. Both characters felt a bit underdeveloped, and I found myself wanting more depth and emotional nuance from their relationship. I also think the story might have benefited from alternating first-person perspectives to bring us closer to each character’s inner world—third-person narration created a bit of distance that made it harder to fully engage.

That said, Mia Hutchison-Shaw’s narration in the audiobook was a highlight. Her performance added warmth and personality to the story, and I’d definitely recommend the audio format if you’re curious to give this one a try.

3 stars

#books #bookishlife #booklover #readingisfun #iowabookstagrammers #iowabookstagram #netgalley #stmartinspress #macmillianaudio #ifitoldyouidhavetokissyou #marmarvel #miahutchinsonshaw

Was this review helpful?

Unfortunately I am DNFing this book and will not be able to give a full review. Every reader has different opinions, loves, and hates, and I've discovered reading this book that Yardley as a first name is something that I can't get past. I tried, and unfortunately it just isn't working for me.

I've rated the book 3 stars despite this DNF because the concept is highly intriguing and I believe other readers will find the book enjoyable.

Was this review helpful?

the story was overall good, although the back and forth with the KC and Yardley was a little too much. The action and mission were interesting. This was a cozy spy novel with Ms. and Ms. Smith style adventure and relationship struggles.
Thank you, NetGalley, for the ARC.

Was this review helpful?

“If I Told You, I’d Have to Kiss You” reads like a sapphic Kim Possible re-telling. This fun, action-packed story follows a super-spy and her ex-girlfriend/hacker extraordinaire. The two decided to go their separate ways… only for their secret missions to overlap and for the two to realize they still had a lot to learn about one another.

This one contained a bit too much action and spice for me, making it feel long. It’s a fun plot, but could have been significantly shortened.

Thank you to Mae Marvel, St. Martin’s Press, Macmillan Audio, & NetGalley for the ARC! All opinions are my own.

Was this review helpful?

Thank you to NetGalley and St. Martin's Press for the ARC in exchange for an honest review!

I was SLEEPING on this book when I really shouldn't have! It's so good!! This is my first Mae Marvel, but not my last!

This book lives up to it's pitch of sapphic Mr. & Mrs. Smith but honestly, so much more fun. What I really loved about it is how our FMCs were simultaneously breaking up and falling in love with each other through out the book. How incredibly gay, I loved it. This is definitely a slow burn with a lot of tension and build up which was a fun ride to read.

At times, I did get lost in the spy stuff, but I think that's more of a me thing. It didn't take away from the story, which I think speaks to how fun this book is as I was able to just coast on vibes for the spy stuff I was confused about, lol. I did roll my eyes at the name of the Toronto spy mission being called 'Maple Leaf' as of course that's what we're naming a Canadian mission. As a Canadian who lived in Toronto for a decade, it seemed a bit too on the nose and took a bit for me to get past that silly name, but if that's my only qualm, I'm happy!

Read this book if you're looking for some adventure paired with the drama of breaking up and getting back together with your ex. It's cute, it's fun, it's an adventure!

Was this review helpful?

🕶️eARC Book Review🕶️

“I don’t love these moments where your own side is being as big of an asshat as the alleged enemy.”

If I Told You, I’d Have To Kiss You by Mae Marvel
Pub Date: June 10, 2025
Rating: 🌟🌟🌟💫 (3.5/5)
Spice: 🌶️🌶️(2/5)

Summary:
Yardley Whitmer was born to be a spy. But the one problem, she couldn’t tell anyone she was the Unicorn especially her recently ex-girlfriend. KC Nolan is a tech wizard. From a young age she was hacking into systems no one should be able to get into. KC dreamed of making the world better with her hacking. That is until she did something technically illegal and wound up working for the CIA. One problem working tech for the CIA is you can’t tell your recently ex-girlfriend. That is until you both end up working a super secret mission and finally meet in a briefing room.

Review:
I have been obsessed with mystery romances lately and this was so great. I wish we got more lore on yardley and KCs history but over all really enjoyed the story. The twists were mostly unexpected or if predictable they had some details that weren’t. I want Flynns love story next.

I was so happy this was a sapphic love story just in time for pride. I really loved all the side character queerness too!! I honestly recommend this story.

If you like:
- Oceans 8
- Second chance romance
- LGBTQIA
- Found Family

QOTD: What would you want to do for the CIA? Tech, ground control, research, spy, wardrobe?

Thank you to Net Galley and St. Martin’s Griffin for proving me with an eARC of this novel.

#bookstagram #instabook #igreads #bookish #booksta #bookworm #romance #romancebooks #ireadromance #romcomreads #romcombooks #bookreview #bookrecommendations #bookrecommendation #bookrec #netgalley

Was this review helpful?

Thank you NetGalley for the opportunity to read this eGalley!
I had really been looking forward to this book. The plot sounded like an A+ idea, but the style was just not for me. The whole thing was written quite blandly. Some parts sounded like they were directly pulled from a dictionary. Other parts had zero tact to them, as in the first chapter it awkwardly interjects that Yardley is a lesbian. Also several of the names were strange and it went on about Tabasco sauce coming from Louisiana far too many times for me. I really wanted to like it, but something about Yardley and KC's love story was just not it for me.

Was this review helpful?

I had high hopes for this spy-themed romance due to the premise and being sold as a "mr and mrs smith" story. While I liked the characters, I didn't feel much of a connection to them and I found the overall spy story confusing. The changing of POVS in the middle of chapters also made it difficult to follow. I wanted to see more of KC and Yardley actually being spies, something that would have made the book more exciting. Unfortunately, this was a mostly forgettable romance.

Was this review helpful?

there's something appealing about the premise of this book. a sapphic spy comedy where two ex-girlfriends discover they've been working for the same secret agency? that should be a recipe for chaos and chemistry. mae marvel commits fully to the concept, pulling from the energy of films like this means war or mr. and mrs. smith, clearly has fun with it. the story is packed with covert missions, european hideouts, and enough lipstick and surveillance gear to make any reader lean in.

yardley whitmer, code name "the unicorn," is a second-generation superspy with society-girl poise and a steel spine. she's legendary at the agency, but less successful at home, where her relationship with her hacker girlfriend kc nolan has fallen apart under the weight of too many lies. what yardley doesn't know is that kc - known in the field as "tabasco" - has also been working for the agency all along. when an operation goes sideways, their paths collide and all the secrets come spilling out. now they're stuck working together, pretending they're over each other while trying not to blow the mission or their hearts.

that setup had so much potential. i was ready for messiness, repressed feelings, and enemies-to-lovers energy between two women who never truly stopped loving each other. unfortunately, the execution didn't quite deliver for me. the emotional connection between yardley and kc never felt real to me. we're told there's history, attraction, resentment, desire, but i didn't feel it on the page. the tension stays surface-level, and the romantic beats are rushed or underdeveloped. there are glimmers of something more, especially in moments when their past brushes up against the present, but it never deepens in a satisfying way.

another major hurdle was the pacing. the book is too long for the story it's telling. much of the middle blurs together with repetitive mission scenes and expository moments that don't drive the characters forward. while the spy world is fleshed out and inventive, it often pulls attention away from the romance instead of enhancing it. i kept waiting for the book to settle into a rhythm where the action and the relationship would push against each other in meaningful ways, but it never quite clicked.

what works in film doesn't always work on the page, and i think that's the root of this book’s unevenness for me. in a movie, you can coast on charisma and spectacle. in a novel, you need emotional depth to carry the tension, and that's where this story felt thin. i admire the ambition and i'm always happy to see bold, queer concepts get center stage. but for me, the romance didn't land, and the spy plot, while fun, wasn't strong enough to carry the book on its own.

i really do think this book will resonate with people that primarily read romance. this wasn't a bad read, just not one that lingered with me. the concept is a standout, but the delivery was too uneven to fully enjoy.

Was this review helpful?