So, I will be honest, I struggled with this one. Mostly because I have OCD, and this was very clearly in an OCD person’s head, and it was so accurate it was genuinely kinda triggering! Yikes! But, beyond this, it’s honestly a super well done book that has a really interesting portrayal of family, responsibility, and life after the apocalypse. It really does feel like The Last of Us meets Yellowjackets, and the romantic moments are some of the more powerful ones. It’s high-stakes, high-tension with absolutely phenomenal writing.

Racquel Marie cannot be put in a corner– Marie’s foray into the apocalypse genre is a heart-racing, high-stakes adventure. If We Survive This is a book about learning how to live, not just survive.

If We Survive This is a gripping, violent, and intensely human book. Racquel Marie skillfully combines horror and unfiltered emotion to create a narrative that is about surviving oneself as much as surviving the end of the world.

Six months into a rabies-induced apocalypse, Flora Braddock Paz is still fighting her worries, her sadness, and the constant threat of the "rabids." She never thought she would survive this long. In addition to navigating the horrors of the outside world, Sarah and her elder brother Cain must also deal with the horrific memories and secrets that threaten to consume them from within as they set out on a desperate trip to their family's former cottage.

This book doesn't mince words. The characters are what keep you interested, even though the horror is visceral—the kind that makes your stomach turn and your heart race. Every choice Flora makes and every action she does feels considerably more risky because of her OCD issues. Additionally, the relationships are full of bite (sometimes literally)—particularly the slow-burning, enemies-to-lovers affair between Flora and Crisanta.

If We Survive This challenges you to consider what you would be prepared to do in order to survive through flashbacks, moral quandaries, and a pervasive sense of impending loss. More significantly, what kind of person would you end up becoming?
An unforgettable, nerve-wracking ride.

Thank you to NetGalley and Macmillan for an e-arc of this book in exchange for an honest review.

I want to make it super clear that normally when I rate books, it’s based on how much I enjoyed it.

That is not the case for this one.

This one made me scared and uncomfortable but also seen and not alone. I had to read it in small bursts (which is not my reading style) in order to get it done because it felt too real at times.

This book felt like an alternate version of myself in an apocalyptic setting and it was terrifying. Truly, Flora’s thought process made so much sense to my brain and I did not like seeing that.

Also, this book is horror, not horror comedy with some good laughs, so this genre isn’t really my style. I was genuinely scared during this book.

Because of this very incoherent review with all my feelings, I can’t give this book any less than 5 stars. Any book that can make me feel the way this one does, deserves it.

Racquel Marie is one of my favorite authors, but I was so shocked when I saw she’d written a zombie novel. That being said, she approached it with the same care and attention to detail that she does with her other books. Flora and Cain are lovable and realistic, and Crisanta and Adan won me over immediately. However, I really did not like that the plot twist (to us as the reader) was something that Flora knew all along. It cheapens the plot twist, even if it was very surprising. There were other twists, such as with the arrival of Trent, that did not feel well supported or expected either. Despite these things, this book was so fun and I’ll definitely be seeking it out for my classroom!

I think this book has changed my mind on whether or not I like horror books. I would have never said I do before, but this book was an immediate yes for me. The concept is fascinating. I loved the flashbacks and our main character. The drama of it kept me guessing without ever feeling like a twist was too unrealistic. This hit in every way for me. It's emotional, thrilling, and I think this is Racquel Marie's best yet (and I say that as someone who has adored everything so far). This is a great addition for any collection.

I swear I've never met a Racquel Marie book that I didn't love and I hope I never do. Anything she writes I will be here to read it and im so sure be captivated by whatever it is. Obviously in If we survive this the shift was pretty sharp from her previous three books into something as bloody and gory as this was but It was so good.

I have always loved the post apocalyptic, zombie apocalypse, the last of us, the walking dead etc type stuff so I knew Id have no problem loving that aspect of the book. It was bloody and gory and disgusting but also borderline kinda cool to me because i'm a little twisted like that lol. It might not sit too well for people with weaker stomachs but the characters will absolutely make up for that. I admit I didn't know how a rabies induced apocalypse would work at first but I liked learning the details of all that and it easily just twists itself into the general mold of stuff of this sort, but it was fun to see that twist at all. There was a lot of question around what can the Rabid's hear, how much do they feel, are they still themselves inside but with ultimately no control over what they're doing? And as it is with every time that question is asked its really left up to reader to decide. Theres a ton of moral questions like that asked here honestly. Flora ponders so many so often at least. I feel like I haven't read a ton of books with OCD rep but it was interesting to watch Flora fight that in so many situations that I feel like directly challenged it. Cain, Crisanta, and Adan were awesome characters It was so easy to get attached to them right from the jump, especially little biscuit but i swear my heart tugged every time I thought something might happen to any of them. Flora and Crisanta's bickering was funny but also easy to see right through to what they actually wanted to say. Because of course as we well know, the idiots who are in love cannot actually admit it until they are forced to! Also I saw someone in these reviews compare them to Ellie and Dina from the last of us and that also explains why I loved them so much.

The flashbacks back to the last time they went to this family cabin were a nice break every once in a while and also allowed you to feel a little bit more of Cain and Flora's grief over losing her parents and see how life used to be for her before essentially all hell broke lose. It also really helped me figure out a lot of the stuff that was brewing under the surface and give context to some things in present tense too. Which leads into my final point, when the synopsis said "hidden truths" they were not lying! It felt like every body in this damn book had secrets including Flora. Which was funny because a few times when I was reading id be like wow what a hypocrite but then in the next sentence she would say exactly that lol. At least she's a self aware hypocrite. Overall like I said I loved this, cannot wait for whatever Racquel publishes next because I will be among the first in line to read it,

Yaaaaaass 5/5!
Thank you so much for the eARC. I’m happy to say this one honestly was better than I initially thought 😅
I’m in my late 20’s so def far away from ‘YA’ but now and then I come across new titles that make me wonder how younger me would’ve liked this.

Let me tell you, younger me AND older me enjoyed this!! Tbh it’s such an original idea book wise, I don’t feel like I’ve come across it before so it made it exciting and not just a bunch of tropes slapped together. The rep here is great (as someone w OCD) and done so in a very careful manner without taking away from the story/mood.

Def an enjoyable read!

I really enjoyed the OCD and queer rep this book offers. However I'm not the biggest fan of zombie/ apocalypse settings so that's on me. I would definitely recommend this to someone who finds those topics interesting!

I received an ARC via netgalley of this book in exchange for an honest review.

What I liked:
- the OCD rep (I know very little about OCD or the experience of living with it, and I enjoyed seeing that perspective)
- the characters (I found them all to be “likable characters” and I enjoyed the lesbian rep and the trans rep)
- the setting (this was the first time I consumed zombie-themed media in book form and it was an interesting experience)

What I struggled with:
- If I remember correctly, the back and forth timelines are common in Racquel Marie’s books, and I normally like it, but in this book, I found it a little harder to follow. I struggled to remember where they were, who was there etc. on the page I was reading).
- This book felt pretty slow moving. It didn’t pick up (to me) until around the 70% mark.

I will also say, for fellow Racquel Marie fans, this book does feel a bit different than her others in that the central romance has a lot less “page time”. It is mostly focused on the main character’s struggle with OCD during the apocalypse. Which is fine! But slightly different than what I was expecting so I just wanted to mention that.

All of this being said, I would recommend this particularly to someone who is looking for a beautifully written representation of OCD, or an apocalyptic-themed YA.

I needed some time to emotionally recover from reading this book.... For the Last of Us fans who were obsessed with Ellie and Dina storyline, THIS BOOK IS FOR YOU!!!! You get so emotionally attached to each character as you learn more about their history and what has made them the way they are! I was in TEARS at 2:00 a.m. because I couldn't put it down! I can't wait for it to officially release so I can have a physical copy as a trophy on my bookshelf! 10/10 I will recommend this book to everyone!

Thank you to the publishers and Netgalley for the arc

Minor spoilers ahead

Intense, heartwarming, and exhilarating - I really enjoyed this book! I always love an apocalyptic setting (especially one with "zombie"-esque characters -- Rabids as they are called in the book), and Marie executes the age-old trope with a fresh style that makes it feel unique compared to every other zombie book I've read.

I was a little worried about the intensity going into this as it is YA, but I think the balance between scary and not horrifically violent is perfect. There were some descriptions where I was definitely squirming, so I was happy about that! Sometimes with YA books, the violence is sanitized too much that it loses its impact, but nope, definitely not the case here!

I also really enjoyed the OCD representation. It was an interesting idea- how would someone with OCD manage an apocalyptic situation where death and contamination are so prevalent? As someone with OCD - while mine manifests differently than Flora's - I found the depiction to be accurate and not sensationalized.

I liked Flora as a character a lot. She has to make tough decisions and cares deeply about the people around her. When her brother - Cain - is injured prior to the start of the book, she takes on the role of protector and provider. Their parents are gone- their mother is dead, and their father went to investigate the family's vacation rental cabin to see if it's safe for them to hide out there. When he's been gone for a month, Flora and Cain decide it's time to make their own way up to the cabin.

Cain is also a good character, funny and supportive of Flora. As the older brother, he sometimes struggles to allow Flora to take care of him, a role she has become accustomed to. On Flora's end, she worries immensely about Cain and feels the pressure of keeping him safe.

Loved Crisanta as well and Adán. Adán especially adds much-needed humor and levity. He is also trans, and that fact is treated with respect and care. And Biscuit. Oh, sweet Biscuit, I love you. I did shed a few tears at one specific scene, but in a bittersweet way!

Winnie is also a good addition. Being younger than all of them, her somewhat innocent view of the world contrasts nicely with the other characters. I really felt for her, and while I guessed where her story was going quite quickly, it still hit me hard. It was also nicely done the way Crisanta initially is skeptical of her, but you get to see the way their relationship warms up.

Loved the romance between Flora and Crisanta. They have history, but Flora is convinced Crisanta is straight, despite her obvious flirting with her throughout LOL. I love an oblivious lesbian! I also love "Never Have I Ever" as grounds for revealing group gossip and tensions, so I was squealing all the way through that scene! When they finally do kiss, I was cheering,finally! The build-up is just so good and worth it. Speaking of relationships, there was another one that was unexpected but that I really loved as well. No more spoilers, but I shipped!

There were some cliffhangers and twists that had me gasping. Very well-executed and nicely done, with the seeds planted throughout that you don't see until the reveal. Some of the reveals were sad and had me tearing up, and others had my mouth hanging wide open. Some had me doing both at once. Sometimes it feels like a plot twist isn't earned, but I'm happy to report I didn't feel that way at all here.

I did feel like I found myself somewhat bored with some of the flashback chapters. The book is split between "Then" and "Now", with the "Then" following Flora, her family, and Crisanta as they travel to the cabin for a trip up there. While some of the flashback chapters gave good insight to the characters or revealed important storylines, others were less important, and I just wanted to get back to the present. In the end, I do think they contributed nicely, but the slower pacing was a bit too jarring from the drama of the current timeline.

I also didn't fully grasp why Flora was so mad at Crisanta for what had happened before they met up, but luckily that anger didn't last too long. Crisanta and Adán had an interesting backstory to their friendship that added a different type of tension to the storyline other than just the Rabids. Again, not fullyyy sure why Flora was mad other than maybe Crisanta not telling her (though I felt her not saying was justified), but maybe I misinterpreted something.

I liked that the ending was hopeful while still realistic. There's an intense scene with Flora at the end that is really just a culmination of everything she has been going through, and it was beautifully done.

Overall, I really enjoyed this book and had a great time reading it!

4 stars

omg can everyone please read this please please PLEASE. even if zombie books aren't your thing, because despite being central to the plot, it's really so much more than that!! the OCD rep is incredible, the relationships the right mix of serious and lighthearted - despite circumstances, and the themes ough the themes!!! AND a perfectly executed dual timeline. which is so hard to do, but it's not only done in a way where neither story competes with the other, it also enhances the overall narrative because of the timings of the reveals. I don't want to say too much, but trust me, (as long as you can handle gore, that's important) this is definitely a book you want to read!!!

This story grabs you by the throat and heart and does not let go. This is a story about the end of the world and how hope is the last thing left standing.

I love love love post apocalyptic novels, and this one was not one to disappoint. I felt like I was really there fighting for my life alongside everyone else, and each twist and then was gasp worthy. You’d think a book about the end of humanity would only have the main focus of survival, but the intertwined romances was the perfect addition to the desperation the characters were feeling, and the need for one last shred of humanity. I would definitely recommend this book to everyone, and I look forward to reading more from this author.

Racquel Marie’s books have been favorites of mine since her debut, but her turn to horror might be the best thing I’ve read so far this year. I’m not usually that big on gore and get very freaked out by regular viruses, let alone a zombie-creating mutation of rabies, but the thing is, so is Flora! No matter how terrified I am, Flora is feeling about a thousand times worse! Despite the apocalypse setting, I feel like this book still follows a lot of Racquel’s other books’ themes—family, grief, friendship, survival—and that’s what makes me love them so much. Truly an excellent work. Maybe don’t read this before bed, though.

I loved this one. It’s written quite well and doesn’t come off as your typical YA horror book. The characters are likable and their interactions are believable.

I have read Racquel Marie’s other three books so I was so excited when I got approved for an E-ARC! My girl never misses! I LOVED this. It was very well paced, I immediately connected to Flora, the FMC, and her group in the apocalypse. I thought the structure was good and so many great and memorable moments! I can’t wait to get a physical copy when it’s out in June!

*Thank you to NetGalley and Feiwel & Friends (Imprint of MacMillan) for the Advanced Readers Copy (ARC)*

I loved this book so much.

I've gone on and on about how much I adore Marie's writing, of its tenderness and the emotional punches that hit hard exactly when they need to, so I won't rattle on too much about it here, but the character work here is still a quality of her writing I am drawn to every time.

Flora is such an incredible antagonist. Someone who she, and everyone around her, thought of as weak until the apocalypse came and she comes to learn she can survive in it. Not for herself but for her brother, a person she would die for while harboring some resentments for. Her grief, OCD, and very possible PTSD hurt her a lot throughout the book, but she still fights like hell for those she loves despite her believing she doesn't deserve to survive, not after all she's been through. She tries to shove any perceived weakness down by acting cold and hardened, especially towards Crisanta, her childhood crush, but she cannot help but love those she's closest with. It eventually leads her to learning she does deserve to survive, to live and be with the people she loves and who love her. It damn nearly made me cry.

I'm also really delighted that Marie's prose regarding the horrors, the gore and death descriptions, are so vividly gruesome and great. She admitted in the acknowledgements that she could never do horror because of how squeamish it made her, but I think her horror prose is amazing, and I loved that she pulled it off.

Another incredible Racquel Marie book to add to my shelf, and I cannot wait to see what she'll do next!

*3.5 stars*

I don’t normally gravitate towards zombie books but this one drew me in with its lgbtq representation & comparison to Yellowjackets. It’s beautifully written and has some really great quotes.

The main characters have interesting back stories which makes you grow attached to them and want to learn more. And there’s this unique added element of dealing with OCD/anxiety and navigating through your {already confusion and emotionally heightened} highschool/college years WHILE trying to survive a zombie apocalypse.

It smoothly jumps between the past and present to give us more information into Flora (our mc) and the deep emotions she has to tackle throughout the book. And of course there are some unexpected twists along the way.

It’s beautifully written and has some really great quotes

I did get frustrated with Flora because she has this hero complex but has to be saved multiple times. I do think that we’re supposed to feel this way though.

“It’s so much better to be feared than underestimated”

“No one makes it out of life, unscathed, or unscarred”

“The only blade I had in my possession is the confusion piercing my thoughts”

“Morbid curiosity is a bruise I’ve never been able to stop poking, a beast. I can’t stop feeding despite it’s insatiability”

Thank you to @NetGalley and Macmillan Children's Publishing Group for providing me with an ARC of this book in exchange for an honest review.

"The Walking Dead meets Yellowjackets in If We Survive This, a tense and emotional young adult horror novel from award-winning author Racquel Marie about a teen girl leading a group of survivors on a perilous journey during the apocalypse."

Let me start by saying that I am not a regular reader of horror. But this one caught my attention because it references two very popular television series. So naturally I was curious to see if it's something that students at my high school would be interested in reading.

Flora and her brother, Cain, are trying to survive the apocalypse following the spread of a mutated rabies virus that turns people into zombies. Cain hears a radio message from his father that he's still alive, and the siblings decide to risk taking the trip up to the cabin where they vacationed with their parents before the virus. During their journey, they realize that sometimes it's other people they should fear more than the zombies.

This book features LGBTQ+ characters who struggle to come to terms with their identities as they do all that they can to stay alive. It also touches on mental health issues like obsessive compulsive disorder and PTSD.

I will definitely recommend this book to students who are horror fans!