I thoroughly enjoyed this book. I thought that Sarah did an excellent job balancing her negative and somewhat creepy experiences with things about the show that she thought were positives. While the show has been since revealed to be problematic, I do believe that Tyra Banks did good things for representation in modeling and gave some people opportunities who did not have it before. Sarah says in her book that she believed that the show started with good intentions, but over time needed to keep excitement and ratings and so ballooned into the monstrosity we all know, and my opinion matches this. Yes, it's problematic, but that doesn't stop me from still streaming it. Also, some of the one-off things Sarah said in her book also indicates that many of the regular judges and mentors on the show also has issues with where things were going. TV is a wild place, especially reality TV in the early 2000s.

I came for the juicy gossip and some behind the scenes dish. But a frank, honest discussion about how her time on the show felt like a cult was unexpected and made for an interesting read. This was even better considering that Sarah's season is one of those that I remember well, with many of the moments that pop into my head when I think of show having happened that cycle. Sarah also included some comments around what happened with her career after she left from the show, which I always wondered how many contestants went on to continue to be models and weather having been on ANTM helped or hurt them. According to Sarah, it seems like it was kind of both.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for this ARC!

I was a teen when ANTM was airing so I was all over this book when I saw it come up here on netgalley. I don’t want to spoil too much but I love how many former contestants are speaking out about their experiences on this show. Tyra was a menace and production wasn’t much better. This is a great glimpse into an era of tv you had to see to believe. I hope this is just the first memoir of many from people from this show.

This isn't America's Next Top Best Friend. You had SEX!? What you see is what you get, don’t judge a book by its cover. This is my signature walk and this is the walk that’s going to make me famous.

And the classic: Be quiet, Tiffany. Be quiet! What is wrong with you? STOP IT," the supermodel shouted. "I have never in my life yelled at a girl like this. When my mother yells like this it's because she loves me. I was rooting for you, we were all rooting for you! How dare you.

Look, I like garbage tv and movies. The dumber the better. Sarah Hartshorne has written a book targeted at people like me. As much as she can, NDAs etc, she tells the behind-the-scenes stories of her time at America's Next Top Model.

She breaks it all down, from being "plus-sized" when she wasn't truly plus-sized to interviews about her weight and body, and the lack of bathroom breaks. All the ugly details and stories are there. We've all read accounts from other former contestants but Sarah's writing has something special behind it.

Shows like America's Next Top Model, The Swan, The Biggest Loser....exploration and I'm glad Sarah has survived and thrived afterwards.

Thanks to NetGalley and the publishers for the opportunity to read and review this book.

I absolutely loved this memoir. I am a huge fan of reality TV shows and even though I have not seen America's Next Top Model this still followed the same format most competition shows have, however, Sarah details the length of abusive behaviour that goes on behind the scenes and it was unexpected to say the least.

I greatly enjoyed learning about the casting, filming and exit process for reality TV shows and the expectations involved with being cast. Even from the beginning you could sense a level of mistreatment but it only became more obvious as the book/show progressed on. A noteable moment, is when one of the girls gets eliminated and Tyra demands she leave, only for production to tell her to come back so they can film her running out again...yikes.

The commodification and objectification of the women on the show was astonishing in the way they literally treated them like an object - you don't have to feed it, care for it, or treat it with respect. The lack of empathy from anyone on the production team felt very dystopian.

A huge theme for the novel was that Sarah was plus sized and production would jab her with loaded questions. At first, I felt, "oh she's like me" but the more I read, she was actually mid-sized. It felt a little jarring, because I do no consider someone who is a size 12 plus sized, but in the industry, any women not a size 2 was plus sized. My only suggestion is to be a bit more forthcoming with this, or maybe I missed the part at the beginning where it was mentioned, because it felt like a secret was revealed at the end - "she's not actually plus sized?". The way that cast members openly spoke about her being plus sized, considering this fact, was very disturbing.

Side note, I LOVEEEDDDD that Raja (Sultan) was featured in this book and described in the regal way which we all recognize them for. It was a great touchpoint but they were also the force that brought us down to earth while reading about such an competitive industry.

I am honoured that Sarah felt comfortable enough in her experiences to share with the world but openly talk about such a traumatizing time in her life. There is still so much I could say about this book without getting redundant, but if you love reality TV, competition shows and Hollywood, this is a great read.

Thank you to Netgalley for the ARC!

Sarah Hartshorne writing about her experience on America's Next Top Model Cycle 9 and as a not-quite plus sized model scratches the brain of all the 30 somethings who sat fixated in front of the show for the first couple of years- you know, before the extra problematic scenes or before it wasn’t something we all just watched in horror.
I enjoyed how Sarah spoke with a real appreciation for what the show gave her, while also realizing the parts of it that were hard to process and deal with. The fixation on her weight and constantly feeling pitted against the people in her cycle were exactly what we wanted to hear from the book.
I loved the background into the judges- how they were spun to be positive and supportive coaches but in hindsight, their feedback was often problematic as hell- particularly Twiggy.
This was a quick read and quite nostalgic.
Thanks to Netgalley for an advanced e-arc!

You Wanna Be On Top? was an eye opening read! I remember watching all of the cycles of ANTM years ago, but had NO IDEA that any of this was happening at the time. I feel awful for all of the contestants who had to endure this treatment as what was portrayed to viewers was so far from the truth. Any fan of reality TV and/or specifically America's Not Top Model must read this behind the scenes look!

https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/7455092535

You Wanna Be On Top? By Sarah Hartshorne is the story of what has deemed a plus size model on the popular show America’s Next Top Model. Sarah tries out and makes it through many rounds to get on the show. She’s very pretty and is not plus size by regular standards and that seems to be one of the issues she faces on the show. She is grilled on how she feels about being the only plus sized woman being represented. This is so ridiculous but is a symptom of some’s view of beauty. The contestants are unable to speak to each other, have access to the outside world or even have a book to read. They are followed nearly everywhere in the house so that sound bites can be edited together to fit the theme of the show. The contestants are made up, dressed up and photographed in order to progress to the next round. I’ve never watched the show but have seen other reality based shows and they just seem to breed unnecessary hostility among contestants. I can’t say that this is what happened in this book but I found the description of living conditions ridiculous. This is definitely an interesting book if you are interested in good and bad of modeling. Despite all of the pro/cons of America’s Next Top Model, it appears from follow-up that Hartshorne has found her niche in writing and comedy, Perhaps being eliminated was the best for her life.

When I came across a book about America’s Next Top Model, I was immediately intrigued. Having watched the show over the years and knowing the fate of some of the contestants, I was eager to read Sarah Hartshorne’s account of her experience on the show. Sarah candidly shares her story, questioning whether reality TV lives up to its perceived glamour and whether modeling truly is as glamorous as it appears. I highly recommend reading Sarah’s book to form your own opinion.

I want to express my gratitude to NetGalley and Crown Publishing for providing me with an advanced copy of the book in exchange for an honest review.

This was NUTS 😨 and so damaging to so many women and young girls.

Sarah, a queer former contestant from Season 9, shares her raw and devastating experience with ANTM and I am truly disgusted in the producers, other crew members, and Tyra for treating those women.. those HUMANS.. the way they did. And have, for SO many seasons. I don’t understand how this has been allowed…

The requirements of these girls before the actual show is mind boggling. They had to write all of their traumas on paper and provide to producers for the show. They were gaslit, brainwashed, and manipulated- to where some women lost their identities completely..They had to have an actual psychological evaluation. They had to submit to hair, urine, and BLOOD samples being taken. They had to provide very detailed financial information and that of their FAMILY’S!! Amongst a number of interviews and harsh criticism. Once they were ON the show, they each had a “wrangler” who was essentially an adult babysitter. The girls were always transported to UNDISCLOSED places and were forced to wear blind folds during the boat, plane, car rides (and/or the windows were always blacked out on the inside). They were never told where they were going or what was happening. Their iPods, books, ID’s, phones, etc were stripped of them instantly and used as pawns to get the girls to behave how they want. The girls were absolutely NOT allowed to talk to each other ANY time they were not on camera or hooked up to mics -EVER- or would suffer consequences, including the withholding of food and water, threats, slander, and blackmail. The girls were always in windowless rooms, never allowed to look outside. The abuse of power and control.. these girls were physically, emotionally, and mentally tortured and controlled. So, so tragically sad to me.

Sad to think I grew up watching this show, seeing Tyra Banks (and the judges) as a fashion icon(s), even wishing I could be one of the models on her show “when I’m older”. This was upsetting, but needs to be talked about and brought to the light. This is a serious problem.

Thank you to NetGalley and the Published for this ARC in exchange for an honest review!

What an incredible read!
I am a reality TV junkie and have seen EVERY Episode of America's Next Top Model. Not that I remember half of them and immediately while reading this book. I went and bought the entire Cycle 9 Series so that I can see this in action.
Sarah was ON POINT. For Real.
<b>”And the reality is … it was a cult. I got suckered into a cult."</b>
The entire book was ON Point with what I was totally into the book.
Great Memoir. I will definitely be buying a physical copy of this when it comes out.
Thank you Netgalley. Sarah Hartshorne, and Crown Publishing for a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

I think this book is going to hit Top Model fans in the nostalgia. I'm not sure if people who never watched the show, and specifically never watched "Cycle" 9, would get as much out of it as someone familiar with the show/cycles. The writing was good, humorous, and honest. I'd recommend it to fans of the show.

Remind me to never sign up for a reality show! I really hope things have improved in the almost 20 years since Sarah Hartshorne was a contestant on America’s Next Top Model. I’m sorry to say that I watched Sarah’s season and now wish I hadn’t as I had absolutely no clue what was happening behind the scenes. Tyra Banks and all the judges and producers should be ashamed. This was a solid read - I appreciated Sarah’s sharing and reflections - NDA be damned but at the end it left me wanting more and feeling unsatisfied. I hope there are more books forthcoming which show the dark sides of reality TV. Congratulations on the good book Sarah Hartshorne - I’d love to see your comedy show! Thanks to NetGalley and Crown publishing for the ARC in exchange for a review. If you’ve ever watched ANTM - be sure to check this book out!

4.5 Stars (I received an e-arc from Net Galley in exchanged for an honest review)

Once again we see how terrible ANTM and Tyra Banks were behind the scenes and all the shit all of the contestants have had to go through. I had a phase were I binged watched multiple seasons on one of those sites that only allow a certain amount of time per day. I don't have a lot of memories of Season 9 but I remember Heather and the Enrique Iglesias music video shoot. And I believe that plus size contestants were starting to be shown a little more.

We get to see her life beforehand and what led her to audition for the reality show. Which is where we first see the signs of producer interference, by having her over exaggerate a very small aspect of her small town life. Oh and of course the comments about her being plus size constantly over the show and what seems like gaslighting by always commenting about potential weight loss. There is also constant surveillance and producers withholding books and iPods/listening devices during long wait times, almost like punishment. Constant threats of legal action, very small weekly grocery budgets, finding a hidden camera panel in a toilet stall and lots of trauma bonding. We see how detached Tyra Banks is from the contestants but turns it on for the camera. We see over time from judging panels and producer interviews, Sarah's self confidence and self esteem plummet. Yet never in the bottom two until the episode she is eliminated. Then unfortunately being forced to stay where the contestants were until near the end of filming.

She also interviews contestants not only from her cycle, to get their perspective and experience. There are also many models/contestants who have come out with their stories from the show and a lot of them have YouTube channels. We see her continuing to find modelling work after the show but finds it's difficult with her portfolio and finds that photoshoots on the show were nothing like real life. She also talks briefly about her journey with bisexuality throughout the book, and then her journey with motherhood. I found myself fully surprised at how intense the show controlled them, though not surprised at Tyra's behaviour. The show (specifically Cycle 9) itself aired in 2007 so probably filmed 2005-2006 ish and as someone who was teenager in this time and this was peak favourite reality show and was definitely of the time.

This book is a page-turner filled with fascinating behind-the-scenes information and tea. It's completely engrossing. But what really hooked me was the unflinching exploration of fatphobia and the poignant portrayal of a person grappling with their own queerness during a time when we were told by society that bisexuality didn't exist. Sarah Hartshorne brings a vulnerability to the page I really appreciated as a reader.

If you've ever watched a season of ANTM, you'll want to read You Wanna Be On Top.

Sarah Hartshorne, contestant on America's Next Top Model cycle 9, dishes out some behind the scenes stuff and her real thoughts about being on the show. We get a lot of insight on being a "plus sized" model on cycle 9 as well. Some said she was too thin to be a plus size but too big to be straight size. We go through all the ups and downs throughout her time in the competition and after. This was a fun read, but I kinda wish there were more interviews or conversations with other contestants or insiders.

Thank you to NetGalley and Crown Publishing for the ARC!

In her account Hartshorne pulls back the curtain on ANTM and reality TV, including coercive contracts and abusive work conditions in the name of entertainment and a compelling storyline for viewers. (I was a regular ANTM viewer back in the day, and did watch Hartshorne's season, yet when I looked up images of the cast I was shocked to see that producers pushed a storyline of her being "plus sized"?!)

The writing and pacing were inconsistent for me, but I appreciated the author's efforts to describe the cult-like experience of being on the show (including referencing research on how cults function, and parallels to how the cast were treated). Even back when the show aired it was obvious that the cast were expected to put up with a lot without questioning it, in exchange for this supposedly great opportunity, but what the book reveals is so much worse. If you are interested in our culture of reality tv in general and how it affects participants, this book may interest you, even if you aren't a fan of the show.

Thank to Crown Publishing for the ARC in an exchange for an honest review.

DNF - 33%

While I spent a good part of the early to mid aughts watching ANTM, I'm not sure I completely remember this cycle of contestants. Perhaps that's part of the reason I failed to connect with Sarah. Regardless, I felt the writing very superficial and wanted her to delve a lot deeper. It felt like a slog to get to 33% to me and better to just DNF. I hope someday there will be a more compelling account that shows the manipulation and problems that occurred within ANTM.

Thank you to Crown Publishing and Netgalley for a copy for review consideration.

As an avid watcher of America's Next Top Model back in the day, I will happily read anything that comes out about contestants' experiences on the show, because everything they were put through was WILD. I think we can all look back at it now and recognize how much toxicity there clearly was on that set, and we can only imagine what went on that can't be talked about due to NDAs. I'm glad to hear Sarah Hartshorne's first hand account of what her experience was like on cycle 9 of the show, because we haven't gotten a lot of details from former contestants (I imagine out of fear of lawsuits or other retaliation), and this really felt like a diary of her time on ANTM. She expresses what it was like to be thrown into this completely unfamiliar situation as someone who didn't have any experience in the modeling or reality tv worlds, and how jarring it was to be under the control of a production team that ran a really tight ship. I had heard about how difficult the filming conditions were for the show, but Sarah included some instances that were really harrowing, such as health issues getting ignored, and long work days with little to no water, food, or bathroom breaks. Meanwhile, she also talks very openly about what it was like to be considered a plus-sized model even though she wasn't truly plus-sized, and how every interview on the show seemed to involve questions about whether or not she was insecure about her weight.

I think that fans of ANTM will find this book very interesting, harrowing, and a little bit nostalgic. I can also see it appealing to people who are just interested in the modeling industry, or the reality tv culture of the time.

fun, well-written book about the situation of america's next top model. i know NOTHING about the show but the book was still really good. 5 stars. tysm for the arc.

I have to admit I was not a massive follower of the show "America's Next Top Model," so I think that is why I didn't really get much out of this book. I didn't watch every season, so some of the references didn't mean as much to me as they would to someone who was a loyal follower of the show. I enjoyed the behind-the-scenes look at reality TV and how fake it is, though. I always suspected as such, but Sarah's experiences showed way more than I had suspected.

Please don't construe my two-star rating as a sign that this book is not good...it was still entertaining to me...I am just not the audience this was likely intended for. Sarah does have a talent for storytelling and I'd encourage anyone who is a reality TV or ANTM fan to check this book out.