This is such an important book, and one I definitely recommend to people wanting to learn more about the queer and disabled experience. Support/care workers and anyone who works in the disability field in particular definitely need to read this.

Andrew Gurza manages to tackle heavy issues like ableism and homophobia while still keeping the tone of the book light and focusing on queer disabled joy, as the title promises. I loved the all the sex positivity and discussions around masturbation and sex workers, they are topics that need to be talked about more.

I've seen a few negative reviews say that this book doesn't do a good enough job of representing every queer disabled experience. I think that's an impossible expectation to put on a singular book. But I'm a lesbian whose main disability is mental, not physical. Yet I was still able to relate to most of the stories in this book. I think instead of demanding for one person to somehow cover every aspect of being queer and disabled, we should be demanding for more queer disabled voices to be uplifted and spotlighted.

I've definitely felt very excluded from the queer community due to my disabilities, this book is probably the first time I've had those feelings validated. I can't recommend it enough.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for this e-arc in exchange for my honest review.

Such a great and inspiring read! I found myself really loving Andrew's attitude and how he makes for such an incredible advocate for queer and disabled people!

I really loved this book - it felt like I was just having chats with a friend about their life and experiences. I’ve read a lot of both disabled and queer literature, but very little disabled, queer literature. This book by Andrew Gurza is a great stepping off point for anyone looking to expand their knowledge but who may be nervous about the idea of approaching a very “academic” text. I learned much about queer disabled joy, and about how I can work to make the queer spaces I inhabit more accessible. I’ve seen some negative reviews saying that this book isn’t representative of every queer disabled experience, and I don’t think it ever claimed to be. This is a book by Gurza, all about their experiences throughout their life, and how that knowledge can inform changes that we can make about our society. It does a fantastic job at that! I will absolutely be following Gurza’s work from here on out!

Thank you to NetGalley and Jessica Kingsley Publishers for the ARC in exchange for an honest review!

I am so glad that this book exists! Andrew Gurza is a powerhouse in the sex & disability spaces and this book just showcases their wealth of knowledge. I feel incredibly grateful to learn from him through this book and their other work. The book reads conversationally and is reminiscent of a one-person show detailing dramatic insights that lead the audience to a clear takeaway about how to address ableism in their everyday lives. I love how queer crip joy is layered throughout the book as it grapples with the unrelenting reality of how ableism really sucks, lol. Gurza's honesty and candor offers the audience to be welcomed into his overarching message with such care and approachability. I want more books like this to exist! More disabled, queer, trans, racialized, neurodivergent, non-Western, etc voices to speak on sexuality and disability. I think Gurza's book is a great contribution to these ongoing conversations, and I can't wait to support the other voices that contribute next!

This is a must-read book if you do any type of carework. Seriously, it should be required reading for all careworkers that you need to complete before working with folks. This is also a must-read for my fellow queers who think that we're 'allies', but who have never thought about the steps that lead into our fave drag bar. Even if you are queer and disabled/neurodivergent in some way, still READ THIS BOOK, because neither of those categories exist as a monolith and there is so much to learn from Gurza's generous offerings in this book. Also, anyone who is working in TV/film, events etc needs to read this book and contact Gurza because there are some banging ideas in this book that need to come to fruition!

A bold and raw take on the crossroads of sexuality and disability. Andrew Garza wrote this book as a part memoir and part guide to coming to terms with how ableism often plays a roll in the world of sex. This book was both too narrow in scope and also too broad, the focus on Andrew’s experience as a gay person resulted in some great stories but was to the detriment of every other sexuality. Also, the suggestions/self help sections about how to tackle this information on your own felt underdeveloped and quite frankly almost always felt shoehorned in. So on the whole I thought this was an important book that needed more to feel complete.

A candid and raw take on sexuality and disability. This book and Andrew take is so funny and really easy to read. Covering topics from accessible spaces in clubs, to representation in media, this book is a must read for anybody in or allied to the queer community!

Thank you to NetGalley and Jessica Kingsley Publishers for the eARC! This book was published in the US on April 21st, 2025.

Notes from a Queer Cripple is the raw, hilarious, and fiercely tender disability justice sex-ed you didn’t know you needed. Andrew Gurza cracks open the myth of “inspiration porn” and instead offers us the messy, joyful, deeply human reality of being queer and disabled—and looking hot while doing it.

Reading this felt like getting a voice note from a friend at 2 a.m.—equal parts confessional, gutting, and horny. Gurza’s voice is frank, flirty, and radically vulnerable. They open with their own definitions of disability and ableism, and from there, the narrative unfolds like a love letter to his disabled queer self—a self shaped by rejection, survival, and eventual erotic reclamation. I found myself underlining passages about the heartbreak of being excluded from queer community due to inaccessibility, and then smiling through misty eyes at the fierce joy they reclaim through sex, community, and crip wisdom.

Gurza doesn’t sanitize anything—thank god. He shares everything from learning to masturbate in his disabled body to how mobility aids can be part of sexual intimaxy. They don’t ask for pity; they ask us to do better. To talk about access needs in the bedroom. To make queer clubs accessible. To stop treating disabled sex as shocking or inspirational and start treating it as real. He reminds us that time spent convincing able-bodied people that disabled folks are desirable could be better spent...well, actually having sex.

At its core, Notes from a Queer Cripple is an urgent call to queer community: practice access intimacy, not just in theory but in the thick of our desire, our dancefloors, our dating apps. Gurza is asking us to stretch—not out of guilt, but out of love.

This book cracked something open in me. It’s one of those reads I’ll come back to, especially when I need a reminder that queer disabled joy isn’t some shiny exception. It’s a right. It’s a practice. And if we’re really about liberation, it has to be collective.

📖 Read this if you love: candid memoirs, radical disability justice, queer sexual liberation, and authors like Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha, Eli Clare, or Mia Mingus.

🔑 Key Themes: Internalized Ableism and Sexuality, Queer Community and Access Intimacy, Disabled Pleasure and Body Sovereignty, Reimagining Desire and Disability Representation.

Content / Trigger Warnings: Mental Illness (minor), Bullying (minor), Sexual Content (severe), Ableism (severe), Pandemic (minor), Medical Content (minor).

Thank you to Netgalley and the publisher for an ARC in exchange for an honest review of Notes From a Queer Cripple. Unfortunately I was unable to read this before the archive date but I look forward to finding it out in the wild!

If you’re looking for a sexy disability-affirming book, this is it! Andrew Gurza does a brilliant job conveying all the fear and uncertainty that accompanies being a disabled adult looking for love in today’s day and age. From dating apps to the middle of clubs, we get to see some formative moments for Gurza’s approach to the queer scene. As a queer disabled person myself, I related to many of the tales of ableism and pretty privilege in the community. This book is not afraid to breach hard conversations and be real. And that’s what makes it so good!

Thank you to NetGalley for providing me with the eARC, but it did not affect my review in any way!

I requested and received this book from NetGalley. My opinions are my own.

This book is so important, I'm so glad I had the opportunity to read it. Especially right now. This is the first book I've ever read that focused on sex and disability, specifically queer sex and disability. I've read so many essays, memoirs, and poetry collections about queerness and/or disability but rarely both and never this open.

I wish I had this book in my early twenties for the deep dive on ableism and the disabled sex ed. Ableism is painful I know from experience. Books like this one would have helped me recognize ableism for what it was.

My favorite parts of this book were "My dream club What I wish accessibility in queer spaces actually looked like" and "The Importance of Representation". I'm a creative person and they got my creative juices flowing. I believe this book is a great resource for both sex educators and creative people. I think a lot of creative writers are afraid to write disabled characters. Especially in Romance, Romantasy, and Erotica. And I believe this book is a great doorway to overcoming that fear and internalized ableism.

Overall I loved this book. I really needed it right now. Everyone will experience disability at some point in their life and everyone deserves to feel hot and desirable. Both should be able to happen at the same time. I've got a lot of thoughts rolling around in my head about this book. I hope it inspires more disabled people to talk about the intersections of disability, queerness, and sex.

I loved this book. I feel disabled joy, I feel seen, I feel heard, I feel loved, I feel held. Andrew writes with a hilarious yet informative tone which just makes you feel like youve had a conversation with them, and this made Notes so easy to read. His annecdotes were emotional, because I recognised so much of a universal disabled experience in them, and his tips were genuinely helpful. I cried reading about disability aids as sex toys in the best way - like Andrew expressed, the idea of them as part of the fun rather than in the way is new and beautiful to me. I will be buying a copy of this ASAP, and have recommended to several friends!

HOT. DREAMY. DISABLED. I flew through this book!! It is sooo rare to read something this candid about sexuality and disability. Andrew is so funny and has so much goodness to say. I LOVED all their dreaming about queer disabled spaces in clubs, romcoms, horror films, sex parties, porn, drag shows, music…i want to see all of that!! I soaked it all up. There are so many great stories and anecdotes as well as just so many practical ideas for queer disabled folks like Andrew and myself to BE in queer spaces. I’ve been so self conscious lately about that and it was really encouraging to read and felt good to get some practical tips. I would read dozens more books by Andrew. I want MORE!! Thank you so much for writing it.

Thank you to Jessica Kingsley Publishing and the author, Andrew Gurz for the opportunity to read and review this arc edition of Notes From a Queer Cripple: How to Cultivate Queer Disabled Joy (and Be Hot While Doing It!)

As a Nonbinary person who has lived the last decade with various chronic illnesses that have led to me being in a wheelchair for accessibility and needing aid from my husband, I was curious about this book. I liked how it was bold and came across as being fiercely unapologetic that there are Queer disabled people and we’re often overlooked in various aspects of society but more specifically in the very one we’re supposed to be a part of.

The author uses they/he pronouns which we find out quite far into the book and identifies as nonbinary which makes my the main issue I had with the book be all the more infuriating and take me back to my first years as a late teen and very early 20 something year old experiencing gay bars and clubs back in the nineties and early 2000s. The book felt like it was focused less on the Queer community as a whole where there is a plethora of genders and sexual orientations and instead was male-centric. Why does it make me have flashbacks to those early years, well that’s because I would enter a bar hoping to feel welcomed and able to relax and realise all too quickly that I was in the Viper’s den with it being overwhelmingly full of men and something with M/M sexually explicit imagery and video on display. I didn’t feel welcome or able to let the mask I’d worn in work or college down and be myself because I wasn’t welcome and sadly that was the case in many of the scenarios the author brought up - of course, they’re first person and it is what they have known but it was difficult to relate to it.

I think perhaps, some of the notes that are in the book could have come from other queer and disabled people to provide some more relatability and offer insight into how someone such as myself who is AFAB could overcome something that made them reticent of going out or experiencing Pride or LGBTQ bars etc? It would have certainly made some of the book more relatable to me and I imagine many others, If we’re going to break down walls and remind the world that you can be Queer in whatever manner it may be and also a variant of disability whether it be visible or not:? Then you need everyone’s voice or as many as possible.

Love is Love - should mean for everyone and as it’s become a phrase used by LGBTQIA people and their allies, it should include everyone and that is what Andrew is trying to educate the reader on as well as thoughtful insight into ableism and internalised ableism that I realised I’m guilty of in many scenarios. From sexual encounters to going out with friends and partners, I think we as disabled people often don’t realise we are essentially bullying ourselves and It made me think of how often I will over analyse how me getting ready, the setting up of my chair and public transport or taxis impact a day out. How many times I have said I’m okay about not going because I simply don’t want to add further work to everyone around me.

All incidents of internalised ableism that I’ve disregarded until this book made me think.

What Andrew Gurza definitely has is the ability to make you laugh, to provide humour to situations that at the time no doubt were far from humorous to him whilst showing the reader it’s okay to both feel the way they do but also how to possibly have a redo if you’re ever in a similar situation. For example he spoke about going to a local park to simply enjoy a warm day and have a relax and someone thought he was lost… Of course he wasn’t, it’s near to where he lives and no doubt frequents as often as he is able. I could see myself in that same scenario at a loss for words, because it’s apparent to all that the person asking simply doesn’t think someone in a chair should be able to go there… Many who aren’t disabled would be quick to deny it, to say the person was being helpful and maybe they were but we see it all too often, Like when someone is helpfully pushing your highly expensive and very very important wheelchair for some reason and when questioned, is suddenly on the defensive.

Being disabled regardless of gender, sexual orientation, age etcetera doesn’t mean we’re all incapable of doing things or asking for help.

There are many moments given by the author to make the reader think, whether they are disabled or not - and I agree completely with some of the suggestions given but again , I also struggled with others, for example encouraging a person who has struggled with sexual experiences or intimacy to reach out to a sex worker. Do not get me wrong, I fully agree that they are valid, their careers are important and the stereotypes that have lasted decades need to disappear but it made me uncomfortable and I think could also lead to more dysphoria, and moments that are negative too. It could also lead to injuries because you’ve not built a rapport. I also see that this advice felt once again, very male orientated and exclusionary to other queer people.

There are also incidents the author talks of from his experience and then suggests are okay to do so that felt exploitative and made me feel very unsettled and concerned for those involved in the recollection and for the theoretical from taking the advice. No one should be exploited or have the clear rules of say employment at risk because of you regardless of your disability or not.

All in all there were some very valid points, more needs to be done to help in the talk of disability in the LGBTQ community, places like Pride parades for example should be open to all - from first hand experience? They often aren’t.. There needs to be conversation that goes right to the top of politics and local community in ensuring venues are accessible, again whether they are Queer friendly or not. I also fully agree that there needs to be support for the disabled person to feel comfortable talking about the restrictions their body can cause and along with trying to minimize internalized ableism. I know when I got sick, it was a case of here’s your diagnosis your life has forever changed now,, Bye.

I wanted so badly to love this book.
I was so excited to *LOVE* this book!
Finally, a book that dares to delve into the issues faced by those in two minority groups -- Queer and Disabled. This couldn't have been more perfect!
But the more I read, the more this book about the queer, disabled 'community', the less this felt about the actual queer community and very, very masculine centric (please note, the author does use they/he pronouns). But at about the 60% mark...I had a realization about this book about the Queer, Disabled community....
So I did a search:

Female -- Zero mentions
Woman -- Four mentions, all relating to negative interactions
Women -- Zero mentions
Lesbian -- One mention in a breakdown of 2SLGBTQ+
Trans -- Zero mentions (outside of two reference link titles)
Transgender -- Zero mentions outside of one mention in a breakdown of 2SLGBTQ+
Non-binary/Nonbinary -- Five mentions (this is the authors identification)
Male -- Nine mentions
Gay -- Twenty-eight mentions....
Man -- Nine mentions

This, on top of some statements that are inherently exploitive left me feeling let down and disappointed.
I'm not saying that there weren't some fantastic points made in this book, and questions asked that are great conversation starters, but the continuation of queer culture being so male-centered was extremely prevalent and made this book feel not quite as inclusive as I believe it was trying to be.

Andrew Gurza is funny. You have to deal with society and survive whether your different from someone or not. People suck and sometimes we end up carrying their words and ideas in our heads for far longer than they are in our lives.

I nodded my head from my prone position on my bed so many times that I had to remind myself that I’m not supposed to be moving my head this much (chuckle). You won’t find the magical answers to getting laid here, but you will hear a voice that you can totally relate to. The author shares intimate stories. I love sex workers too - just saying.

Not handicapped? Then read Notes from a Queer Cripple to understand how we live. The struggles that we have to deal with on a day to day basis. This book is a quick and funny read. Gurza puts it all out there to educate and illuminate people being queer and disabled in a world that doesn’t see us as something other than a nuisance.

I love this book.

This gave me a peek into a severely disabled sex life that I really needed.

As a person who is currently getting more and more disabled every year sex is something I do struggle with. I often don't feel sexy when I need supportive pillows. I often don't feel sexy if I can't dress well for a day. Being so dependent on my partner for many tasks definitely doesn't make me feel sexy either. And while Gurza their disability is very different from mine, they show in this book that you can still be hot, cute and wanted regardless of how you function. And damn did I need to hear that.

This book talks a lot about the ableism that Gurza has faced in queer communities. It gave me insight into spaces I assumed that were quite fine, that they are often really not. I haven't gone out much since I started using mobility aids, especially not queer circles. I did however frequent those spaces from time to time when I did feel better. And while I'm sure this wasn't Gurza their intention, it doesn't make me very excited to mingle in the physical queer community again when I get my wheelchair (hopefully soon). But what it does to me even more, is making me feel assertive in my shoes that when I do hopefully go to pride this year, that I feel confident to demand accessibility information. We belong in those spaces and nobody will tell Gurza or me otherwise. This strong message really made me feel empowered and left me with good feelings lasting longer after reading it.

Gurza also talks a lot about how it is to date when being severely disabled. Their negative experiences they talked about really hit me hard, filled me with rage. They talk about how those moments keep coming back up as internalized ableism in their head and damn did I want to give them a hug. It was good for me to learn and see this side of dating, that is unnecessary made so much harder for people like them because of the ableism that's out there. I hope if I ever start dating again I can take these lessons to heart and treat my potential severely disabled partners with love and dignity.

Concluding this book taught me so much, and gave me so much hope. I am immensely grateful this exists and I hope it goes far.

Thank you to Netgalley and publishers for the review copy!

This was such an insightful and informative read that I recommend many, non-disabled and disabled alike, read but especially the queer community.

Andrew speaks about the lack of accessibility in queer culture and how we preach “love is love” while actively excluding disabled people from the community - from the way we view disabled people (to be pitied, or viewing them with disgust or even fear) to not including ramps or disabled toilets at queer clubs or events, or not allowing space for caregivers to attend these events as well.

This was a valuable perspective to add to disability literature.

While I read this as a queer disabled person, I think this should be recommended to everyone. I love that while I may relate to some things, it gives insight into the way that Gurza experiences the world and it is all very well written.

Jessica Kingsley Publishers are fantastic at publishing perspectives which are hard to hear elsewhere, and this is no exception. Gurza is a direct and accessible communicator, and this book taught me so much about the ways the queer community excludes physically disabled individuals.

They are empathetic and funny and honest throughout talking on themes of intimacy and relationships and dating. He weaves personal stories with practical advice for disabled people and allies. I will be recommending this to lots of people, especially as perspectives from people who are power chair users are rare in publishing.

This was a quick yet insightful read at under 200 pages! It wasn’t what I expected at first, but I really enjoyed the author’s voice.

If you’re interested in queer disabled experiences, this is a great pick. There’s a strong focus on sexuality, so keep that in mind if it’s not your thing. That said, I found it thought-provoking, especially as an able-bodied queer person. It challenged me to recognize and unlearn some ableist perspectives.

Highly recommend for anyone wanting to better understand queer disability inclusion!