Like Family by Erin O. White is a thoughtful, emotionally layered debut that explores the complexities of chosen family, parenthood, and the invisible threads that bind people together. Set in the picturesque town of Radclyffe, New York—a place so idyllic it almost feels like a lifestyle catalog—the novel offers a warm and often touching portrait of three interconnected families trying to live out their values in real life while holding onto long-held secrets.

The heart of the story lies in Ruth and Caroline’s deep, decades-long friendship, and White does a lovely job capturing the quiet intimacies and unspoken loyalties that define such relationships. The novel thoughtfully examines how love—romantic, platonic, parental—can be both sustaining and messy, especially when secrets and unresolved tensions are involved.

However, the book sometimes feels a bit too serene, even when major emotional revelations or crises occur. The stakes don’t always land with the weight they should, and some of the characters—especially the men—come off more like supporting cast than fully realized people. There are moments when the prose veers into overly reflective territory, slowing the pace and dampening the tension that the story hints at but never quite fully delivers on. I often found myself confused by the number of characters, particularly the adults and their many children, who sometimes blended together. Many of the characters had similar voices or traits, making it hard to keep track of who was who or feel fully invested in each of their stories. While the writing is warm and reflective, the pacing occasionally drags, and some emotional revelations felt muted by the calm, almost too-peaceful tone.

Still, Like Family is a compassionate and earnest exploration of modern family life and the blurry lines between friends and kin. It's not a book that will shake you, but it may leave you quietly moved—and grateful for the complicated people who make up your own chosen family.

Thank you to Random House and NetGalley for providing me with a copy of this book. It will be published on November 4, 2025.

Quietly Powerful and Deeply Human

Like Family snuck up on me in the best way. It’s not flashy or twisty—it’s honest, heartfelt, and full of emotional nuance. Erin O. White writes with such clarity and compassion that you feel like you’re sitting across from a friend, hearing a story that’s both deeply personal and universally resonant.

The book explores queer identity, chosen family, motherhood, and the complicated beauty of long-term relationships. It’s about love in all its forms—messy, enduring, sometimes painful, but always real. White’s voice is warm and reflective, and her storytelling feels like a quiet rebellion against the idea that only big, dramatic moments matter.

It’s not a page-turner in the traditional sense, but it is the kind of book that lingers. My only reason for not giving it a full five stars? A few sections felt a bit meandering, and I wanted just a little more structure to anchor the emotional weight. But honestly, that’s a small quibble for a book that moved me this much.

If you’re into memoirs that feel like a long, meaningful conversation over coffee, this one’s for you.




Thank you so much to NetGalley and The Dial Press for this ARC!

Like Family by Erin O. White
4/5⭐⭐⭐⭐

A story of grief, jealousy, love and what really makes a family.

First and foremost, this is a debut novel and that fact has my jaw on the floor. This was so well written and the cast of characters are so well developed that it feels like I’m getting gossip about my neighbors down the street.

This novel is very queer and follows three couples in a small town in Upstate New York. It is a delight as it fearlessly tackles the complex and often layered emotions that accompany adult friendships, parenting, marriage, and gender identity. It highlights introspection, communication, and conflict resolution in such realistic ways.

My only qualm, beyond some characters not feeling wholly wrapped up by the ending, is with the character Bex. They were treated like a unicorn by almost every other character of the book which felt strange. I can understand the point of their character and how their existence helped the other characters learn more about themselves, but in a world where every other character felt so solid, Bex came across as a mirage.

Overall, I believe this book was beautifully done and would definitely recommend this. Especially, if you enjoy emotional character driven reads that center around some of life’s biggest questions.

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Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for the ARC in exchange for my honest review.
Book to be published in November 2025.

In a small town in update New York, people live seemingly idyllic lives. Ruth, Wyn, and their four children live on a small farm (fulfilling Wyn’s dreams). Ruth’s closest friend, Caroline, often comes over to the farm with her husband and son. And her husband’s cousin, Tobi, who is more like a sister, her wife and their two children live nearby. But underneath their seeming perfect exteriors, each of the families are facing their own stress. When someone from Ruth’s past dies, it sets off a series of events that somehow brings all of these tensions to the surface, threatening the relationships between and within each of the families.

This was a powerful examination of family. The author deftly explores the challenges of navigating even the closest relationships, how difficult it can be to communicate within those relationships about what really matters, and all the different ways families can fall apart and come together. I was impressed by this debut, and I’m excited to see what comes next from this author

Highly recommended!

Wow! It’s shocking that this is a debut novel! The writing is absolutely exquisite.

The story centered around Siddha laid the groundwork for this extensive cast of characters, each with their own intricate complexities. The “found family” theme was seamlessly woven throughout the narrative, and I thoroughly enjoyed it.

I would highly recommend this book and give it a solid 4.5 stars!

Like Family is an amazingly good debut novel. Set in a village in the Hudson Valley, with its farmer’s markets, swimming holes, and local artisans, this story brings all the cozy vibes. Settle in and get yourself comfortable, this book is hard to put down.

The main characters are couples, two queer and one straight, in their early middle age with children. The flawed characters are well developed and interconnected through family and friendships.

I highly recommend this book to anyone who enjoys family drama literary fiction. It’s an outstanding story of family and found family. I loved it!

Like Family: Growing Up in Other People's Houses by Paula McLain is a poignant memoir that delves into the author's experiences as a foster child in the 1970s and '80s. The narrative captures the emotional turmoil and resilience of the sisters as they navigate their tumultuous childhoods. McLain's evocative prose provides a raw and intimate look into the complexities of family, belonging, and survival.

"Like Family" is a thought-provoking novel set in the idyllic landscapes of the Catskills and Hudson Valley, centering on the intricacies of interrelated families as they navigate the complexities of their lives. The narrative showcases a diverse array of characters, encompassing both queer and heterosexual couples from various socioeconomic strata. It thoughtfully examines the challenges inherent in relationships and the quest for personal identity, emphasizing the notion that no single individual can satisfy all emotional requirements.

The narrative employs alternating perspectives, enriching the storytelling, with Caroline’s viewpoint particularly resonant alongside those of Ruth and Tobi. White adeptly captures the dualities of existence, portraying both the joys and trials of life through realistic and relatable experiences. Initially, the book unfolds at a measured pace, gradually gaining momentum as it addresses profound themes such as mortality, betrayal, and the fragility of interpersonal connections.

As the characters undergo transformation, you find yourself deeply invested in their journeys. The emphasis on character development renders the narrative both rich and engaging. The characters' imperfections and complexities enhance the slice-of-life quality, encouraging one to ponder the essence of family and the dynamics inherent in adult life. Ultimately, "Like Family" presents a heartfelt exploration of love, loyalty, and the intricate bonds that shape our existence.

Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for the advance review copy in exchange for my review.

I received a copy for review and all opinions are my own.
Loved the diverse mix of characters in this book. As they were middle aged it was a nice refreshing look at the chaos of our lives at this age. The ins and outs of life in this novel are mixed with some tragic and chaotic secrets thrown in. This was a very enjoyable read and I really didn’t want the book to end.

Blue Sisters, but way more gay. This year’s “Sandwich.” A great debut family drama.

This book follows 3 couples in upstate New York, with young kids. If you are confused reading the blurb, you aren’t alone. It is kind of difficult to keep the characters straight (lol) but in the ARC I have read there is a helpful chart in the beginning of the book to tell you who the couples and their children are.

The characters are not perfect, but definitely not boring. This is slice of life, tackling themes such as; “what makes a family? What makes someone family? What do you do when you have everything you ever wanted?” The couples in this book are in their late 30s/early 40s, they are interconnected and have strong family vibes. Their inner dialogue is sometimes kind of self-indulgent. They are exhaustingly liberal, the kind of liberal where you feel like you have to care A LOT about everything all the time.

Critics may say this book lacks plot, but it really focuses on character development, and there are so many characters that it becomes very well rounded. Everything kind of builds to the couples counselor’s advice in the final act. It’s only a couple of paragraphs but it ties it together nicely.

Thanks to NetGalley and Dial Press for the ARC. Book to be published Nov 4th, 2025.

Like Family is the kind of novel that sneaks up on you—quiet, intimate, and layered with the kind of emotional truths that feel both tender and unflinching. It explores the complicated, beautiful mess of adult friendships, parenting, marriage, and the quiet sacrifices we make for the people we love most.

Set in a picturesque upstate New York town full of farmers’ markets and hidden swimming holes, the setting feels cozy—but the real heart of the book lies in the relationships. Ruth and Wyn’s small farm becomes the emotional center of their friend group, and when tragedy strikes, every character is forced to reckon with old tensions, buried desires, and truths they’ve been too afraid to say out loud.

The writing is thoughtful and warm, with moments that made me tear up not because they were dramatic, but because they were true. It captures the ache of wanting connection, the vulnerability of being known, and the bittersweet joy of growing older alongside the people you’ve chosen.

If you love books about found family, imperfect but deeply human characters, and stories that sit with you long after you close the cover—this is one to treasure.

Like Family begins slowly, but once it finds its rhythm, it drew me in fully. The story tackles hard, emotionally charged topics—death, betrayal, and the fragile nature of relationships—with unflinching honesty. I found myself growing more and more emotionally invested as the characters’ complexities unraveled. What I appreciated most was how realistically the struggles were portrayed. Nothing was neatly resolved; the characters had to work through their pain and misunderstandings in a way that felt true to life.

Thank you NetGalley and Random House for the arc!

I was brought in by the cute cover, and stayed for the family drama. I am not usually a family lit fic person, but this was pretty good. I liked the modern feel of all of the families and always am entertained by other people's secrets.

“Like Family” by Erin O. White offers a poignant and realistic look into the lives of interconnected families and friends. Set in upstate New York, the story explores how these families—both queer and straight, affluent and middle class—confront their challenges and choices. It serves as a coming-of-age tale in which adults learn about their own identities and the evolution of their relationships, recognizing that a friend or partner cannot fulfill all their needs. White skillfully captures both the joys and difficulties of life, our connections, and our sense of self.

I thoroughly enjoyed this exploration of the complexities of life within this close-knit community. I also appreciated the diverse cast of characters presented throughout the narrative. Thank you to Random House | Dial Press and NetGalley for the ARC.

I tore through this enjoyable novel in a single sitting - I loved the Catskills/Hudson Valley setting and the alternating perspectives. Caroline’s was my favorite, but I was equally propelled by Ruth’s and Tobi’s. I would recommend to anyone who enjoys family (both biological and chosen) stories or small town life.