I'm not going to lie I started crying at how it resonated with me. How I connected with Amber. How even though the situation is different that being sexually assaulted; it still got me blubbering.

It is sad but about how rape or any sexual assault can happen all the time and can go unreported. It Happens All the Time by Amy Hatavany is about Amber and her Best friend Tyler became best friends. Over the years when they become adults Tyler wants to be more then friends with Amber, whom is engaged to someone else, but Tyler thinks it should be him otherwise.

Tyler gets obsessive about wanting Amber and when finally Amber is not with her
Fiancé, Tyler notices that Amber is flirting with him. It's the 4th of July and they decide to go to a party. They got drunk. Something horrible happens and Tyler can't remember anything. But Amber screams when she sees Tyler.

They story goes back and forth from Tyler and Amber. Two perspectives. Both devastating and saD. The ending is a good ending.

I gave Amy 5 Stars. It's easy to read. Good book for awareness even how sad it is. I think it brings up good perspective on the guy too. This is where I wanted to tell about my sexual assault.

8 years ago, I was sexually assaulted by my Best friend's father, who was 52. I was 16. I started it but when I went to my therapist said that he should have stopped it if he was a grown, respectful man. I did blame myself, because I thought I liked it. He made me believe that I was supposed to be comfortable with him. I could talk to him. He wasn't abusive, until the end. He started saying I needed to clear my acne or I would be perfect. It was happening for 3 months I think more or less. His wife caught us doing something. Took me and my sister home. I ran away. I couldn't take it. My dad wanted to report it and I didn't want too. I didn't want to go up and speak. But my dad set me up to talk with a therapist. I did that. I cried everyday. I was so hurt. I wasn't raped, but I was touched. I thought he was nice and maybe that's why I had feelings that it would work. He was just manipulating me. I found out he did this to someone else that was a family friend. I lost my best friend, but I don't care now. I actually had dreams of being with them or him. Families together again. My therapist thinks that it means maybe something inside me forgives them. If I seen them, I don't think I would be running up to them. They think it's my fault. They are angry with me. They actually moved away to the city away from where they lived. Heard they lost their house.

IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME by Amy Hatvany packs a lot of emotional impact into a relatively short read. The story centers around two best friends, Tyler and Amber, who have helped each other through rough times in their lives. You meet them as teenagers dealing with issues like body images, eating disorders, anxiety, broken families and strained relationships, and unrequited love. The story is told from both perspectives so you see the characters grow up and their friendship expand over the years as they get older. And then one horrible night in their twenties, they find themselves in a situation that they cannot help each other get out of because it's about them and caused by one of them.

For me, this book read as a very real story. The blurry details, the guilt, the emotions -- the reader feels all these things from both characters. This story happens all over the world and the strength it takes to move through an assault is never underestimated in this novel. The topic of consent is one every parent must teach both their daughters and their sons. The pages Hatvany wrote capture the emotional toll that rape takes on an individual, their family, and sometimes their assailant. The last third of this book made me lightheaded like I was holding my breath while I was reading it. What a hard book this must have been to write but one that people should read and should talk about.

I received an advanced copy of this novel from Great Thoughts' Great Readers and NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

some wounds unreachable by words, some sins immune to apology.
Amy Hatvany always seems to be in touch with the pulse of society, and able to turn what is happening into one of her best-selling novels. In IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME (Atria), Amy tackles the issue of sexual abuse and turns it upside down, sideways and all around. With her subtle prose and compassion, she reveals the ultimate fallout from betrayal.
Tyler Hicks knew Amber Bryant was something special the very first time he laid eyes on her. His family moved to her town in his senior year of high-school and soon after his parents' divorce, Tyler and his mom became part of the Bryant family. They spent the holidays together, leaned on one another during difficult times, including when Amber struggled with her eating disorder and she felt Tyler was the big brother she never had. But as they grew up and Tyler became the "big man on campus," and Amber blossomed into a beautiful young woman, Tyler couldn't accept the fact that Amber continued to consider their relationship strictly platonic.
After senior year of college, Amber moves back home, but now she's engaged to Daniel. Tyler freaked out after learning Amber was seeing him while she was away at college, and they had a fight. They haven't talked to one another for months, but Tyler's still obsessed with her and hopes they'll end up together.
One night after partying and drinking too much alcohol, things get out of control and boundaries are crossed. Soon Amber's depression kicks back in and life takes a dangerous turn.
*****
Amy was born in Seattle, WA, the youngest of three children. She graduated from Western Washington University with a degree in Sociology only to discover most sociologists are unemployed. Soon followed a variety of jobs. In 1998, Amy finally decided to sell her car, quit her job, and take a chance on writing books.
The literary gods took kindly to her aspirations and THE KIND OF LOVE THAT SAVES YOU was published in 2000 by Bantam Doubleday. THE LANGUAGE OF SISTERS was picked up by NAL in 2002. (Both were published under her previous last name, Yurk.)

You can contact Amy on Facebook, her website www.amyhatvany.com  or twitter @amyhatvany

It Happens All the Time was a difficult book to read, but it was well worth it. This was certainly a timely and important story.

I've enjoyed Amy Hatvany's writing for awhile now. I had no doubt I would enjoy this. She writes in a way that you just can't walk away from the story. This story deals with a very difficult issue, sexual assault.

I love how she looks at all sides of this conflict, but never excuses it. Our main character who was attacked, has other issues in her life. So there is so much going on in this story.

It's heavy, it may be a trigger (so avoid this if you think it might be you), and it's captivating. She's very fair with all characters, and the development is sneaky. You are just reading, and next thing you know, you understand what makes them tick.

4 stars. Very good tale that held my interest and made me invested in Amber and Tyler's story. For some reason, I didn't connect with Tyler like I hoped I would throughout the book. I felt Hatvany, as always, knows how to tell a story and keep you interested in her characters and I was very satisfied by the ending.

Thank you to NetGalley for providing me with this free ARC in exchange for my honest review.

**Rapists can be men, women, teens and even children as can victims/survivors. For the purposes of this review I am referring to rapists as he and victims/survivors as she.**

What does a rapist look like? Ask most people and a scary, brutal, stranger comes to mind. Actually, most rapists are known to their victims, boyfriends, family, friends, acquaintances.

Thinking of rapists as one dimensional bad guys is somehow easier that realizing a rapist can be your neighbor, friend, doctor, the supermarket clerk. How can we know who to trust?

Amber trusts her childhood best friend as much as anyone, including her fiancé. She doesn't realize his feelings run much deeper. Tyler loves Amber and has since the day they met, secretly harboring wishes she'll leave her fiancé for him. At an Independence Day party after Amber's college graduation, she and Tyler have too much to drink. She says no, he doesn't listen.

Told in both Amber's and Tyler's points of view in alternating chapters, Amy Hatvany created two sympathetic characters. Amber suffers under the weight of her parents expectations and overprotection. Recovering from an eating disorder, she's probably someone who left therapy too soon, with work left to do. Every rape victim should have parents as supportive as hers. Tyler grew up hearing emotionally abusive words from his father. Nothing was ever good enough, Tyler was never man enough. His father is a one-dimensional misogynistic bully. Like most abused kids, Tyler longs to please the man he loathes. While his mom loves him, she's often more concerned for herself than meeting his needs. My favorite character was Mason, Tyler's no nonsense coworker.

Tyler was sympathetic up and until the rape. His difficult backstory was no excuse. Looking back on the whole story, I realized perhaps he was more controlling and selfish than I originally thought, in small ways like refusing to leave Amber's side when she was hospitalized. In her shoes, I can see why some of his actions hovered between pushy and charming, but giving him the benefit of doubt, then looking back and saying, "I should have known." Girls and young women aren't told often enough to trust their instincts.

IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME starts off months after the rape, when Amber confronts Tyler then weaves back to their meeting as young teens through young adulthood until the rape and its aftermath. I finished the book in an afternoon, enthralled by the plot, characters and writing. The confrontation wasn't completely realistic, though not out of the realm of possibility.

The title is perfect for the story, unfortunately. It does happen all the time. Parents should read this important novel and share the book with their teenagers and discuss. IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME would also be great reading for high school English classes.

IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME is a hopeful story of acquaintances rape and recovery.

I have read other books by Hatvany and she never disappoints. IHATT is a highly emotional read and will grab your attention from the very first page. I could not put this book down. It has been a long time since I have read a book that touched me so deeply and stayed with me, long after I finished it.

I would highly recommend this book.