Come Closer

On love and self-protection

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Pub Date 18 May 2017 | Archive Date 02 Nov 2017

Description

Everyone engages in self-protecting behaviours to some extent, but when these begin to take on the form of bad habits, they can be damaging. People often use self-protection strategies in love and relationships to mitigate potential pain or heartbreak. This book considers the defence mechanisms inadvertently used to avoid closeness with other people, the inner self, and reality and any resulting distress from confrontation with these bodies.

This book will teach you how to recognise specific protective behaviours that hinder close relationships and why we engage in them. By understanding the source of these patterns and objectively considering the alternatives, the author will guide you on the path to overcome negative protection strategies and embrace positive relationships. With a foundation in psychology, this book will also be of interest to professional counsellors and therapists.

Everyone engages in self-protecting behaviours to some extent, but when these begin to take on the form of bad habits, they can be damaging. People often use self-protection strategies in love and...


Available Editions

EDITION Paperback
ISBN 9781785922978
PRICE $14.95 (USD)
PAGES 128

Average rating from 3 members


Featured Reviews

Upon reading this book, I knew that I had done some of the behaviours sure to be featured.

As an introvert, loving friends and family has always been hard, it was never their fault and I knew that deep down I kept my secret to myself of the one person who destroyed my faith in trusting people when I was just a young child. I only ever confided in one person and they left me behind too because I couldn't accept it. Years later its still hard, but I have.

This book comes from a trained pastor and psychotherapist, the discussion based around self protection has shown me so many ways I used to use myself. My dad works extremely hard, eight till six everyday since I was little. However this made me feel closer to my mum. Now though, we make time for each other and instead of pushing him away with excuses, we are in a much better place.

In my teens, bullying got to me and as discussed in the book, you can run or face it and join your friends. I did both at different times, but still to today I feel unsafe at times leaving the house because of the physical abuse I endured from other students. I even turned on myself too. Which is the worst thing to give up on yourself.

Reading this book now makes me realise how much I have grown and I am getting better. Relationships close to me are now supportive and not toxic. Love and care is around me and its genuine. People ask me how I am and I ask them back making time and supporting each other is so key in life and Ilse Sand shows us in this book we need to come closer to each other literally in life to progress. A brilliant book to be read, thanks to the publishers for allowing me to review it.

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Ilse Sand has quickly become one of my favourite authors. This book has a lot of insights, yet don't come across as preachy.

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