Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want to Come

Oh man I devoured this story from the very beginning!!! It was hilarious and very relatable! Highly recommend! I will be buying this in hard copy when it comes out.

From the opening pages when Jessica Pan warns her husband on her birthday no birthday party I felt a bond with her.My husband can not understand that I never want to celebrate my birthday all that attention.I am seemingly very outgoing but in reality a total introvert..This book was funny moving all introverts will identify with Jessica’s struggles to be more outgoing make friends.be social.Introverts This is the book for you Perfect also for anyone involved with an introvert. #netgalley #andrewmcnealpublishing,

This was a beautiful memoir that being an introvert myself I could relate to on many levels. I found it engaging and a good read. I would recommend it to fellow introverts.

I would like to thank Netgalley and the publisher for providing me with a copy free of charge. This is my honest and unbiased opinion of it.

I knew I needed to read this book when I read this title. This book is written for those of us who secretly delight in the joy of canceled plans. Jessica Pan puts herself out there to explore life as an extrovert, and hilarity ensues.

Really great, I could not put this down. I will be recommending it to people! The writing was impeccable. I can’t wait to read more by this author! This is now my favorite collection of short stories.

As a fellow introvert, I can definitely relate to a lot of Jessica Pan's experiences. Pan had a goal of breaking out of her shell and enlisted the help and advice of some experts along the way. Her story is shared with lots of insight and plenty of humor. This book was a lot of fun to read and I learned a few things too.

Thanks to Andrews McMeel Publishing and NetGalley for the eARC in exchange for my honest review.

Thank you NetGalley for the ARC

As a somewhat introverted person, I related to this book on so many levels! I felt like Jessica Pan was a kindred spirit for me. I found myself nodding my head in agreement while reading the book and at some points (well most) saying to myself "Oh my god! Me too!"
This is a must read for all introverts and even extroverts because it is laughing out loud funny and also very relatedable!

Really good read. Some interesting points! Enjoyed it. Will post a full review soon on the blog. Great job. Look forward to reading more!

n introvert spends a year trying to live like an extrovert with hilarious results and advice for readers along the way.

What would happen if a shy introvert lived like a gregarious extrovert for one year? If she knowingly and willingly put herself in perilous social situations that she’d normally avoid at all costs? Writer Jessica Pan intends to find out. With the help of various extrovert mentors, Jessica sets up a series of personal challenges (talk to strangers, perform stand-up comedy, host a dinner party, travel alone, make friends on the road, and much, much worse) to explore whether living like an extrovert can teach her lessons that might improve the quality of her life. Chronicling the author’s hilarious and painful year of misadventures, this book explores what happens when one introvert fights her natural tendencies, takes the plunge, and tries (and sometimes fails) to be a little bit braver.

Totally loved the book "Sorry I'm Late, I didn't Want to Come". As I am also an extreme introvert, It made me smile. But it also gave me thought to get out and make an effort. I must say, I do have an excuse for everything. In this day you can order weekly groceries online, food delivered, even restaurants and pharmacies. Amazon is a friend.
Love this book. I will be buying the paperback.

Thanks to NetGalley for the advance copy for review.

This book caught my eye and I thought it would be a funny read. I think it was ok. A bit of it gets redundant and a bit cheesy, but still a fast read with some interesting points that lead to introspection.

I read this in an afternoon. What a great memoir for introverts and I could totally relate to the author. A must read for anyone who is introverted.

I used to always be outgoing and still am to an extent, but I have become more and more of an introvert over the last few years. This book was funny and I could relate to her. I realize that I should be more of a “yes man” then a no man.

It’s so easy to just stay in and browse through the internet, but this was a nice reminder to get out and about.

Never have I felt so connected to a book since I stumbled across Susan Cain’s “Quiet” years ago. Pan does an excellent job making a nonfiction work flow as beautifully as a novel. This was compulsively readable, highly relatable, and thoroughly enjoyable from start to finish.

If the title of this book speaks to you, you absolutely need to get a copy! Pan tells her story of stepping out of her introvert shell with relatable and laugh out loud humor. While reading there were so many things that made me think, made me stop because I was laughing so hard, or made me say "Oh my goodness, me too!"!
Really looking forward to the audiobook version of this, I'll be snapping that up ASAP!

I recieved an ARC of this book in exchange for my honest opinion.

#SorryImLateIDidntWantToCome #NetGalley

Upfront, I received a free copy of this book from Net Galley in exchange for possibly reviewing it.

I LOVED this book. I am an Introvert with a Myers-Briggs I. This book was on my TBR as soon as I saw the title. I'm not a shintrovert like the author. I have to pretend to be an extrovert for work, and it is exhausting! What's a shintrovert? Read the book. Still, I could relate to her story on so many levels. Oddly enough, I have also lived in Beijing and London. I know exactly the challenges she's talking about. She is a lot kinder in describing them than I am. I really enjoyed her approach to the personal challenge she set. Besides being funny and entertaining, the book is surprisingly educational. I learned quite a bit, and I felt she really incorporated expert advice so well.

If you are an introvert, read this book. You'll find a kindred spirit. If you are an extrovert but always wondered why introverts do the things they do, read this book. If you don't know what you are, take a Myers-Briggs test first, then read the book.

And Jessica, now that I know many of your deepest, darkest secrets, would it be weird if I still wanted to be friends?

#SorryImLateIDidntWantToCome #NetGalley

Thanks to Andrews McMeel Publishing for the ARC!

Since the first time I saw the cover, I just knew I had to read this book. I’m clearly an introvert too and I immediately felt a connection with the title.

The author tells us about a very tense moment in her life, when her father had an open-heart surgery in LA and she saw herself alone in the waiting room. Her mother was there too, but they only allowed one visitor at a time, so she had to wait by herself for a while. Days later, after crossing the ocean and going back to her home in England, she realized how lonely she was. She wondered what would happen if she had sudden major surgery, with her parents on the other side of the world. She didn’t want her husband to sit there alone in the waiting room. She needed to find more close friends who lived in the same city.

But, who? How? Where?

She talks about a very common issue we face in adult life. Most of us have some really great childhood friends, but we often live too far from each other. Our lives changed a lot since we met. Now we have jobs, husbands, wives, kids, taxes to pay... We shared lots of experiences together, but we're all living different lives now.

We have internet friends, who are amazing, cause we usually share the exact same interests. But again, they live too far away. They probably wouldn’t be able to visit us at the hospital, for example.

Then, we also have friends from work, but not everyone is lucky enough to actually enjoy these people. And honestly, we don’t wanna see the same faces on our days off. We all need a break, right?

So, Jessica decided that she needed to find other creative ways to make new friends. Even being very shy, she just had to put herself out there, just to see what would happen if she tried to be a little bit more extroverted.

She tried a bit of everything. Friendship apps, book clubs, weekly improv classes, networking meetings, travels, stand-up comedy, etc.

She met some great new people along the way, but the most important thing was learning to see herself in a different way. She’s much more confident now. She’s still an introvert, but the idea of meeting new people doesn’t seem so scary anymore.

I loved all her references to tv shows, movies and music. As a big gilmore girls fan, I was very glad to see it being mentioned too.

I really enjoyed this read. :)

I loved this book! Jess' first book 'Graduates in Wonderland' is one of my all-time favorite books.
This one was more thought-provoking than I was anticipating. She writes in such an honest and naturally humorous way that I just adore. Plus she's talking about real things that we all experience and sharing how she's learn to deal with it in a healthier way. This book made me laugh out loud, but also made me really contemplate areas in my life where I have become complacent or have been missing out because I was afraid or thought I wasn't a certain "type of person."
I really appreciate that the moral of this book wasn't "Change who you are! If you're an introvert that's bad and extroverts are BETTER!" But she simply (through vulnerably sharing her own experiences) encourages us all to stop limiting ourselves based on labels or waiting for some day to come when we will be more perfectly suited to step out of our comfort zone.
Overall, such an enjoyable read. I flew through it because in reading this Jess felt like my cool older sister who was sharing wisdom with me and making me laugh and almost cry. Definitely recommend

As an extroverted introvert, I related to this book so much! I recharge by reading books by myself, and while I love my friends, I need that personal time. I laughed out loud and was able to take away several nuggets to push myself. Recommended for both introverts and extroverts.

This is a hilarious, totally relatable read. My attention was instantly grabbed by the title, but it was sustained by the humor and heart of the author, not to mention her openness, honesty, and bravery. Highly recommend.

Relatable on so many levels! I flew through this and had so much fun reading it. If you consider yourself an introvert, this is a must buy!

As an introvert, I found this book to be so relatable. I loved that I could see myself in the scenarios as well as be inspired by the author and her stories. Too much fun! Anyone could benefit from reading it.

I wanted to immediately give this book to several people as I was reading this laugh out loud memoir by a 30ish “shintrovert” (shy introvert) who decides to undertake a year long experiment being more like an extrovert. It was such a refreshing lesson on connecting with other humans face to face, even when it means having to deal with intimidating strangers in unfamiliar surroundings. Jessica Pan is an American transplant in England. Feeling friendless (aside from her husband), she subjects herself to stomachache inducing ventures that start with talking to random people on the train and advance quickly to doing stand up comedy at The Fringe. Her goal with each experience is to make deep, meaningful connections - to get past small talk and surface friendships. It’s a nerve wracking but ultimately highly rewarding year. As a journalist who lived abroad, travelled and even did a (what she described as failed) stint on TV, I think her introverted nature certainly didn’t stop her from being pretty adventurous. Her willingness to put herself out there in various painful ways is really inspiring. And, she survived! Even had fun! Although I would draw the line at doing a joke monologue on stage, based on how funny she is on paper, I think she obviously had something in her that would make improv and stand up viable challenges. At a minimum, I found myself at a reception recently where I thought to myself, “what would Jessica do?” and made more of an effort to talk to new people. That’s a start!

As an introvert (who pretends to be an extrovert), I can relate to this book. Introverts RSVP yes to parties that they don't actually want to go to and bail at the last moment to watch Netflix. We can relate to Jessica. But then as you get older, how do you make new friends if you are staying home? You say "yes" and actually do them. This book shows all of us that we should also keep plans to make new friends, and become more confident in meeting new people like Jessica. This was a funny, super relatable story that every introvert needs to read to understand how to better them selves. And for every extrovert to read to better understand their "flaky" friends.

Being mainly a fiction reader, I branched out when choosing this book. I am so glad I did! Also being an introvert, it was nice to read this kind of material. I loved it.

Easily one of my favorite books of 2019. Following along Jessica’s year of being an “extrovert,” I felt her pain, excitement, and accomplishments. As an introvert myself it was easy to understand her and feel triumph at all she accomplished in a year. A few great tips and practices I’ll integrate into my life. Thanks for a great read, Jessica!

This is a book that any introvert can relate to! I enjoyed the light hearted writing style. I'm not a big memoir or confessional reader but I picked this one up based on the premise. I'm an introvert and the idea of saying yes and faking extrovertism sounded so terrifying! I think this could have easily been a series of blog posts or a shorter book. But still a recommended read.

A self-proclaimed "shintrovert" (shy introvert), Jessica is living in London with her husband and feeling lonely now that all of her good friends moved away. She decides to try to live more like an extrovert for a year to see if she can find new good friends. She tries things like talking to strangers, public speaking, an improv class, and hosting a dinner party.

I enjoyed hearing her research and experiences. Some of them made my heart rate increase as some of her activities are high in my avoidance radar. An encouraging, entertaining, and inspiring read for this introvert who has felt lonely at different times to be brave and put myself out there when needed.

From the moment that I started reading the introduction to this book, I was HOOKED. Pan has a uniquely readable voice that is calming, understanding and enjoyably funny. The stories she tells are funny, yet poignant – without feeling even a little bit preachy.

The book tells the story of Jess, the author. She's a shy introvert (also known as a shintrovert). This is the story of how she hit rock bottom, had depression, and how, because she was absolutely terrified of talking to new people, had almost no one in her life that she could hang out with – as friends. Jess had lost her connections to society. So, she decided to do something about it, and what she decided was that she needed to be a little more extroverted in her life. You know, as a science experiment. (PS: I love Jess.)

To be honest, I was crying by page 22 (look, it was an emotional week, I'd just seen Avengers Endgame – I still can't talk about that). I guess I didn't expect to connect with this book so much, but I did. I saw a lot of me in Jess' story.

This book has helped me to verbalise something that I have been realising about myself recently. I am a very good listener. If you talk, I will listen. I will learn your children's (or pet's) names, I will discover where you went for holiday last, and I know either the last movie you watched at the cinema or the book you read. And if you ask me small talk questions, I will answer. But what I am bad at, is that two way exchange. If you come to me for small talk, you need to be prepared to keep the conversation going, because I have forgotten how to ask questions in response.

You see, I've noticed that when my colleagues come up to me on a Monday and ask "How was your weekend?" I'll tell them it was fine. I might have been to the cinema, or finished a book. Maybe I didn't do much at all "A nice, quiet weekend at home." But then it's like my brain goes blank and I forget to ask how their weekend was. I just jump straight into work topics. "How are you going with that report / spreadsheet / presentation? Don't forget it's due on Wednesday. Do you want me to look over an early version?" It's not that I don't care about their weekend – I'm just distracted because I'm in a work setting and I can have work conversations. Personal conversations and small talk elude me more often than not.

Perhaps it's because I've gotten used to speaking into the void, as one does when they spend a lot of time blogging. I've lost that ability to ask questions that I expect to get a response from. Asking questions at the end of my blog posts has always felt a bit weird to me. What if no one reads them? Well, no one will respond. So, instead of putting myself out there, I end my blog posts with a generic "Until next time, happy reading!" where it doesn't matter if people don't write comments. I've stopped putting myself out there in the social media void, and now I can't remember how to do it in real life either.

Despite all this recently discovered self-awareness, this book has some amazing stories in it. I was scared for Jess more often than not (although I was cheering her on as well). I wish I had read this book 5 years ago when we moved 800km away from friends and family. But I'm going to try and apply my newfound knowledge when we move back home in a couple of months. Because maybe I won't click with my old friends any more. Or maybe I'm just ready to try some new experiences – put myself out there, so to speak.

If you're an introvert, or even an extrovert wondering what it's like on the other side, I highly recommend this book. It's funny, well written, considered, and most importantly, brave.

I think this book will be relatable to people beyond whether they consider themselves to be introverts. The author does a great job of conveying her struggles with being both shy and introverted (a "shintrovert," she calls it), while at the same time framing it as a personal journey and not a reflection on the many introverted people who are living happy and well-balanced lives. So this book is about getting out of our comfort zones, and growing, and being flexible rather than letting a label predetermine us. It was insightful and courageous, with funny and witty writing. I enjoyed it, and think I would love it as an audiobook!

Thanks to NetGalley for providing an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

The beginning of the book really annoyed me. Introversion =/= social anxiety and I think it’s really important not to mix the two do these things together. Many of her social experiments seemed more to do with her shyness and social anxiety than her introversion. Now that being said. I love that the bulk of her social experiments are all things i've seriously considered doing from Bumble BFF to public speaking. I enjoyed the evidence and research she put behind what she did and how she reached out to different experts to help her out. There were many factoids that I am able to bring into my own person life (did you know it takes 5-8 encounters/hours for someone feel like they are a “friend”?). I enjoyed this a lot and would recommend this to fellow introverts.

A funny and charming account of how shy introvert Jessica Pan spent one year living as an extrovert. This is an easy read as Jessica has the ability to carry you along in her story. You feel as if you are there with her when she climbs on stage and attends networking events to get over her fears. As a fellow introvert (although maybe not to the same extent as Jessica), I really enjoyed learning the mechanics behind how she overcame her anxiety and worries.

I haven't finished a book this quickly for a while. I started and finished it within a day. The writing is conversational and reading it feels like you're hearing a friend talk. The book is grounded by cultural references that made me relate to the author a lot. I could feel the anxiety and the fears of doing all those extroverted things as an introvert, but the accounts also are very inspiring. Jessica doesn't sugarcoat the bad stuff, you get to see the embarrassing moments just as truthfully as the exciting ones.

There's just one thing that kept me from giving it five stars. On her extroversion journey, she meets a lot of people, but I found it hard to keep track of them. Unless her connection to them is described again, I found myself mixing them up even though it wasn't so long ago that I had read about their first meeting. But that's just a minor nitpick I have with the book and even when I'm not sure who Jessica is interacting with, it's an interaction that is delightful to read about nevertheless.

This book details the authors attempts to expand her horizons by spending a year doing extroverted activities such as networking, public speaking, hosting a dinner party. really enjoyed this book from the start as I warmed to the author immediately.

I liked that it focused mainly on personal connections rather than professional ones. The author mentions Quiet by Susan Cain which is a book I read the second time this year. The second time reading, I felt that Quiet talked a lot about work relationships that I just couldn't apply to my own life. In Sorry I'm Late, there is one chapter about networking which was interesting but I wouldn't be interested in any more than this as I have no need for networking in my line of work.

One criticism I have is that she refers to everyone by their first name and I often got confused about who she was talking about. Especially when people have non-distinctive names (Nick, Chris, Mark). This was especially confusing when she had spoken to experts - I think a clearer distinction is needed so the reader knows whether we are hearing a layperson’s opinion or that of an expert who has done research into the field.

It has inspired me to try some new things myself over the next year. Although I wouldn't try all the things she did (such as public speaking), I still found the lessons learned useful for any times I might need some of these skills. For example, I rarely have a need to speak in public in my life but I did have a job interview recently where I had to do a presentation so it's always useful to develop these skills.

I love immersion journalism, and Pan's yearlong experiment to push herself outside of her comfort zone was an enjoyable and inspiring read. She was not claiming anything is wrong with introversion, but she personally wanted to feel less shy. I admired her bravery in trying to (and scary!) things, and I enjoyed her humorous writing.

This is the EXACTLY the book I needed.

I don't think I have ever written a book, but reading this one makes me think I have. I too am a 30 something, shy, introverted, small town Texas girl who has no idea how to have a conversation (that doesn't involve ghosts or dogs) or make friends. I'm not Chinese, Aries or named Jessica (Pan) but I would have been if my cousin hadn't been born first, forcing my Mom to "get creative" and name me Jennifer (Ann) instead. The title of this book caught my attention, because SAME, but I had no idea just how relatable it was going to be! There were SO many times I caught myself nodding along enthusiastically or cringing at how awful some of these experiences she was forcing herself to have were, and just laughing out loud. Literally. I have finished this book inspired to go on an extrovert journey of my own - not today - but maybe someday soon I will be as brave as Jessica is.

This is my daughter's motto, so I had to read the book. It is a self-deprecating look at a person's attempts to break out of her shell. Reminded me of A.J. Jacobs.

How far would you go in order to make friends (in a foreign country, in a busy city)?
Jessica Pan goes the whole nine yards, which is admirable. She challenges herself to overcome her natural shyness, to leave her comfort zone and live as an extrovert for a year. And she does it by the book: she sets her target, does research (sometimes on Google!), talks to specialists (not necessarily licensed, anyone with a vast experience should do!), puts the ideas in practice and then quantifies the results. Talking to strangers on the street or on the bus, going on a trip in a surprise city without a map or tourist guides or eating magic mushrooms might not yield the desired result, but networking, friend-dating and taking improv classes might. By the end of the year, Jessica gathers enough friends to host a Thanksgiving dinner (the ultimate challenge!).
The author's light tone, the self-deprecating humour reveals not only Jessica's vulnerabilities but also shows she's aware of her shortcomings and needs people in her life that might compensate for them. We all do, so grab a pen and paper and start taking notes!

This was a very interesting take on what it is like to be an introvert trying to function in the everyday world. There was some humor and a great understanding of what it is like to be an introvert that gives insight for those who are not.

I was totally intrigued when I saw the title of this book. I am a social introvert and I enjoyed this lighthearted but relatable non-fiction book that read like an engaging novel.

As a shy introvert frequently known as a "shintrovert", Jessica Pan decided to take a year to step out of her shell and enter the "extroverted world". After a family crisis in her family turned into a light bulb moment she realized she was lacking in the friend's department. She decided to take this time to focus on connecting with new people who might just turn into the good friends she was hoping for in her own life.

She shares her trials and tribulations and also the things she learned along the way...many of which, pleasantly surprised her. This book was insightful and humorous and if this title catches your eye, you might enjoy it too!
Thank you to NetGalley and Andrews McMeel Publishing for a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

Thank you NetGalley and Publisher for this early copy!

I connected a lot with this memoir and Pan's writing style. She went beyond the stereotypical in a great way. I will for sure be reading more of her work in the future. I recommend checking it out, it was informative and well-written. I will be posting a more detailed review soon.

Jessica Pan's memoir feels relatable to me in so many ways. I kept finding myself nodding along as I go through the pages. I enjoyed Jessica's humor and am thankful for the tips to be a bit more "grintovert" in life. Would definitely recommend this to my other "shintrovert" friends.

As an introvert with occasionally crippling social anxiety, I regarded Jess Pan's book warily. I saw the cover online, laughed at the icing-on-the-cake image, and then gave the subtitle a little side-eye. An introvert… saying yes… for a whole year? Say it ain't so.

Alas, Pan pulled me in with enticing  hopes of being more extroverted without it costing me my sanity, and I'm very happy I gave this one a chance.

I'll start off by saying that motivational, inspirational books like You Are a Badass and The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck are my jam. I love fist pumping my way through and being completely convinced (while sitting quietly alone in my house) that I can conquer all my social-anxiety fears and do anything. And then I put the book down and happily prepare for an afternoon in peaceful solitude. The thing I feel these books have in common is that they were written by extroverts. What makes Pan's work so convincing is that the root of her perceived issues stems from her being an introvert. Yes!

After acknowledging that maybe she could use a bit more of a social life, Pan vows to spend the following year doing things well outside of her comfort zone, including going to networking events where she doesn't know anyone (gasp), meeting women from Bumble BFF for coffee or drinks in the hope of feeling the elusive friend-spark (yikes), taking an improv comedy class (please, no), traveling alone and letting a complete stranger pick the destination (you can't even use a guidebook for help making plans when you get there: double yikes), doing stand-up comedy (I'd rather die), and hosting a dinner party (I mean, at least these people already like her). 

I so totally appreciated the lengths Pan went to for this book. Instead of making bold proclamations about how totally rewarding uncomfortable social events can be (*cough* only an extrovert would say this *cough*), she goes out and does the legwork for us introverts reading with apt attention. And guess what: sometimes it really sucks. She had some really awful, panic-inducing, I'd-rather-be-anywhere-but-here moments along the way, but she stuck with it and came out with a group of unexpected new friends to invite to a dinner party. 

Pan is the introvert that acknowledges that sometimes introversion is a bit of a problem, makes the resolution to try her hand at extroversion, and faces her fears for an entire year to learn that some of the stuff she was (any many introverts are, I'm sure) afraid of really wasn't that bad. She morphs from a "shintrovert" (shy introvert) into a budding "grintrovert" (gregarious introvert) in hilarious, heartwarming fashion. 

Her story is one that will stick with me when I'm dreading a networking event or considering cancelling plans, and I'll recommend her advice to many of my introvert friends. 

Many thanks to NetGalley and Andrews McMeel Publishing for the opportunity to read this ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Being an introvert, this book was a perfect choice for me. I loved how the author challenged herself for an entire year to live outside of her comfort zone and try to become more extroverted. Some of the chapters--like the ones about public speaking and doing stand-up comedy--made me sweat. It was so encouraging to see that she could attempt these extroverted hurdles and live to tell the tale! The author's voice is personal, never judgemental, and always funny. She was never preachy and didn't make me feel like because I am also an introvert that I needed to engage in the same kind of experiment. But I loved reading about her insight and feel that I gained some helpful advice to put myself out there a little more. This book isn't for everyone--I'm not sure that anyone who isn't an introvert would enjoy this book (hence the reason for fewer stars)--but I would highly recommend it for all of the introverts out there.

This book spoke to my soul. As an introvert who's struggling to find good friends, Jessica Pan's year of pushing her boundaries both intrigued and terrified me. She describes each foray with honesty and humor. Though I'm not sure i could do the same it has given me motivation to put myself out there more often. This book was a pleasure to read.

I received this ARC from NetGalley in exchange for my honest review.

Thank you NetGalley!!

Once I saw the word Introvert on the cover, I knew this was the book for me.
What would happen if an introvert lived like an extrovert for a year?

This is a highly relatable memoir about that exact question. As an introvert myself, I can't even imagine how difficult it was to force yourself to say yes and put yourself into the very situations you actively avoid. I applaud her for doing so AND documenting it so we can all read it and hopefully be inspired. This was a comical read, and I envy her coruage for trying.

Seriously, read it! You'll love it too.

Thank you to Andrews McMeel Publishing and NetGalley for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

I really enjoyed this book - Jessica Pan takes us into her world as a "shintrovert" (shy introvert) and what she experienced during a year of trying to live more like an extrovert. Her writing style is warm, witty and personable, and it's hard to believe that she really is introverted and shy. I am definitely more of an extrovert, and found hearing her side of the story very illuminating, in terms of being a better friend to introverts.

From the reviews I saw before I read the book, I understand some people thought it would be more scientific and go into mental health aspects like anxiety, panic attacks etc. and give advice on that level - and it most certainly is not, nor does it pretend to be. The author does consult various experts on how to overcome challenges (talking to strangers, networking etc.) and I liked the way she works lots of facts and statistics into the narrative without bogging it down. There is also a short bibliography included at the back, although this is not footnoted in the text of the book.

Overall - well-written and highly recommended!

Jessica Pan is an introvert and it is extremely difficult for her to make friends. She bails on engagements, is terrible at small talk, and the only friend she really has his her husband Sam.

She decides to change all of this by going out into the world and researching the best ways to connect to people and gives herself a year to really make a change.

This books takes her from Improv to learning how to have a meaningful conversation with another person.

It’s lighthearted, funny, and a bit of a self-help book. I don’t think you have to be introvert to truly appreciate this book. You can be just a human wanting to better your connections with others.

*I received an ARC of Sorry I’m Late, I Didn’t Want to Come from Andrews McMeel Publishing vía NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

Overall, this was a very entertaining memoir with plenty of fun and relatable stories. I felt like Jess and I have a lot in common and she seems genuinely funny and interesting. I also like that on top of being a memoir, this book included a lot of well-researched studies and interviews from psychologists, therapists and other experts who helps Jess on her journey of extroverting. I really enjoyed this book and would recommend it to other introverts and extroverts who are looking for different ways to be more extroverted and make new friends.

I wouldn't really recommend this to highly introverted and sensitive individuals though. My boyfriend, for example, is super introverted and when I told him about this book, just the thought of wandering around the subway talking to strangers made him uncomfortable and gave him anxiety. For me, doing improv and stand-up is where I draw the line but it's still interesting to read another introvert's experience in overcoming their introverted fears (besides, Jess ended up having a lot of fun doing improv and stand-up, so I'm happy for her).

I really liked this book. The author, an introvert, pushed herself to extroverted things. This was a fun, light hearted read. I did find it a bit repetitive at times. Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for this ARC.

This book is so good and light hearted thanks Netgalley and the publisher for letting me get a copy for an honest review. I thought it was light hearted a quick read. The author an introvert pushing herself to do extrovert things was a good thing for me to read because I am also an introvert and it kind of Gave me a push to try and do more extrovert activities.

Thank you NetGalley and the publisher Andrews McMeel Publishing for a free digital version of this book to review!
Rating (on a scale of 1 to 5, 5 being excellent)
Quality of writing: 4
Pace: 3
Enjoyability: 4
Insightfulness: 4
Ease of Reading: 4

Overall rating: 4 out of 5

As a fellow introvert, and completely understanding where she comes from, I have to say I truly enjoyed this book. Not only was I was amazed at how many things Jessica tried during this experimental year, but I am also inspired! I laughed, I shook my head, I got a little teary towards the end. Although I liked this book a lot, there were times when it seemed to drag along. Overall this was a fun read and I'm glad I had the opportunity to read it. Thank you to NetGalley and Andrews McMeel Publishing for a digital arc of this book. And Jessica Pan - I want to be one of your friends and come to your next dinner party!!

Exactly what I hoped for in this book! If you're an introvert, you'll relate well to the habits and quirks of introverts ( and may take some comfort in knowing how common introversion is.) It's a formula that often works very well -- I'll spend a year doing x, and write a book about it -- and in this case it works well. This book also helped me understand the highly-introverted people in my life, as I added another layer of value to this book. This book deserves all the good buzz it's getting, and an enormous value here is getting people to think about and read about introverts. They've been misunderstood for a very long time, judged harshly in some instances, and are easy targets for being cast aside. I liked this fresh look into introversion from multiple angles and find it to be a terrific book club pick since there's so much to discuss: do you really need to 'overcome' introversion entirely? Where is the line for YOU? Maybe it's not something that needs to be fixed. Maybe pushing into discomfort a little bit is a smart choice for all aspects of your life, but if you want to be introverted at times, and you give yourself permission to be in your own peace, that can be a wonderfully healing place to be.
Thank you to the publisher and to NetGalley for the review ARC. This is a good one.

I absolutely loved this book. From the start I was captivated by the writing style and stories and there were many laugh-out-loud moments for me as I read.

I am not usually a big fan of the yearlong quest genre, but even though this book loosely fits that category, to me it is much more. The main focus is on what happens when an introvert makes an effort to stretch beyond normal comfort levels and engage with people in a variety of life circumstances and using many different methods, sourced from various experts.

The author decided to spend a year doing things that put her in uncomfortable social settings to see if she could relieve her loneliness. She shares both her successes and her failures in a series of often-humorous scenarios. I appreciate the balance she offers and most importantly, I leave this book inspired to try some of her methods for myself. I am unlikely to become a standup comic but I definitely can see myself purposefully being more outgoing and really working to have deeper conversations.

Very relatable book. I have often found myself going “I don’t want to do this” about certain social obligations and the author nailed it on the head.

I'm an introvert who isn't shy... I can talk to strangers, public speak (I do it for my work), and host a party, it's just exhausting.  I wanted to see someone else's way of looking at the world, and Jessica Pan certainly delivered.

Shy people have always confused me.  I just can't find the give-a-damn inside me to care what a stranger thinks about me.  I don't judge shy people negatively, I know there are things about my personality that they wouldn't understand.  Pan does an admirable job of putting me inside her mind, so I can see the world with her understanding, even if I don't agree with it.

The only thing I didn't like about the book was the way time jumped forward, but I know everyday life is boring to an outsider.  She concentrated on the interesting bits, and they were certainly interesting.  Just hard to follow when it seems months went by without an update or lesson learned.

Overall, great story and well written.

**I received this book from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

I thoroughly enjoyed this book! I will most definitely be ordering it in to sell to customers at my work!

This was a charming, hilarious, poignant book. It picked me from the title because it's definitely me.

The writer is a shintrovert who finds herself in an unhappy place (cold London, all friends abroad, lonely) and decides to go through a year of extroverting.

If you ever dreaded your birthday party so much you told friends and family only the day before, or every time you had to talk to a group of people, or generally be the centre of attention, then you'll relate so much you'd think you might have written it (if you ever dared doing the crazy things she had done during the year)

The writer is honest, open, she makes you feel every single moment of the challenges she bravely submits her to, being totally funny

So since I know most strong readers and fellow bookstagrammers here are as introvert as I am, and as the writer is, I'm basically sure you'll love it.
"I love you all. The quiet ones, also observing, who are witty and thoughtful and want to leave early with me"

🌟🌟🌟🌟

Went in with no expectations, but found it to be a delightfully funny read. Found there was a lot to relate to in the text and can easily see myself picking up other books by Pan in the future.

Recommended.

With thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for the arc.

I really enjoyed this book as an introvert myself. I could not even fathom putting myself in these situations! It was a great read. Thank you NetGalley for the ARC!

As an introvert, I have reached the age where I have gotten comfortable in being alone when I want to be or not being the center attention in a group.
The author, Jessica Phan, decided that she needed to get outside her introverted comfort zone after feeling depressed within her comfort zone.
Jessica gives herself a year to act like an extrovert and see how it changes her. She utilizes living in London to attend networking events, improv classes, and speaking to different experts on how to make friends or how to have the nerve to do public speaking.
Over the year, she does realize that she craves deep conversations and real friendships (friends you can call to bury a body, she calls them).
Overall, I liked the concept of the book.It was fun living vicariously through Jessica. I feel like she was very hard on herself, but maybe you need to be hard on yourself to invoke any kind of real change.

Thank you to Andrews McMeel Publishing and NetGalley for providing me with an advanced copy of this book. I don't consider myself an introvert; however, I still found this book to be quite comical. Jessica Pan is a witty, clever writer. I'm a sucker for a book of short stories (as it seems to make for a quick read.) Overall this was a fun read and I'm happy to have read and reviewed it.

The title of this book is so me! I am an introvert so my first reaction is to want to stay home. I really liked this book and I would read more from Ms. Pan!

Though she lived in London, a city filled with people and things to do, journalist, American ex-pat, and “shintrovert” Jessica Pan found herself sitting on the couch for yet another evening. Jobless and friendless, she wondered if she was developing a full-blown case of Depression. One day she decided to break the cycle of sitting on her couch alone and set out on a year’s worth of attempting to make friends, try new situations, and put herself into the public eye by attempting stand-up comedy. Along the way, she learns that she can survive a bit of embarrassment, travel by herself, and even make new friends along the way. Her new memoir, Sorry I’m Late, I Didn’t Want to Come documents this year of self-discovery and adventures in extraverting.

By now, “My Year of _________” memoirs have become a sort of sub-genre of its own, with writers picking a project, documenting their progress through the year, and then trying to write a witty book about the process. Oftentimes, it doesn’t seem like the writer comes out of the project having changed very much, and so the “My Year of ________” feels like a gimmick. But Jessica Pan’s self-imposed project begins when she is unhappy and has a genuine desire to make drastic changes in her life. She’s not setting out to prove anything to anyone except herself: that she can go out into the world, talk to people, make friends, and try new things.

The stereotype of introverts is that they are homebodies who would rather stay home with their cats and watch Netflix than go out and socialize in bars or comedy clubs. But while social anxiety is a real problem for many, it is not the case for every introvert. Pan’s unhappiness stemmed from the fact that she was unemployed, and all her friends had moved far away. She was lonely but able to put herself into new situations and try to make new friends.

Thanks to her background in journalism (though often unsuccessful, as she candidly recounts), Pan didn’t go blindly into her year of extraversion. She did her research, found people to talk to on the subject, and developed a plan. She tried friend-finding apps that work like dating apps, she talked to strangers on the Underground and found excellent advice to help break the ice (nobody waves, but everybody waves back). This, along with her own decision to be courageous helped Pan to begin to accomplish what she set out to do: to say yes to new experiences and find new friends.

There is a wonderful sense of both humor and honesty in Pan’s writing. She does not shy away from recounting personal embarrassment or describing when she was uncomfortable or afraid to do something (but then goes ahead and does it anyway). Personal failure is part of life. To hide them in a memoir is to be disingenuous, and when your goals are to A) learn from your experiences by writing about them, and B) describing those experiences so that other people can learn from them, lying about your failures misses the point. By recounting failed ‘friend-dates’, her terror before a public performance, and bombing at stand-up comedy, Pan proves not only to herself but to the reader as well, that embarrassment is survivable, and that putting yourself out there is worth it when it helps you find new friends you can make deep connections with.

“Does there need to be a spark in friendship? I’ve always thought so. You want to have chemistry with someone when they’re helping you move the dead body; otherwise, it’s just a very, very bad night for both of you.

And while loyalty and support are important to me in the long run, I want to laugh and have fun with new friends.”

There are reviews that criticize Pan for putting herself into situations where she was anxious or embarrassed. They feel that she should not have done things that made her so uncomfortable. These reviews miss Pan’s point. Adults– particularly introverted adults– have a harder time making friends than they did as children. But loneliness is a problem that affects a growing portion of the population as we turn to the internet more and more for shopping, entertainment, and connections. Nowadays, it is entirely possible for us to avoid human contact altogether as we do more work from home and have our groceries, clothes, and everything else delivered. While this is convenient, it cuts us off from our social nature. Humans are social beings. We crave deeper connections than a quick trip to the grocery store provides. Pan discovered this first hand and decided she wanted more out of life than a comfy couch and streaming television every night. Though putting herself out into the world was an uncomfortable experience, Pan found it was worth it. She found new friends, learned about herself, and discovered that she was far more courageous than she thought.

“My Year of _________” memoirs often have a contrived aura, but Sorry I’m Late, I Didn’t Want to Come is a bright spot among them, and Pan shows readers that while reaching out to others can be scary, it is worth it to find deeper connections with other people.

This book looks so good, but I'm going to have to wait to get a print copy. I wasn't able to download it to my kindle and I can't read a book on my phone or laptop., Thanks anyway for the download ARC and I will be happy to post a review on Goodreads once I'm able to get a copy I can read.

Okay, I just finished this and I loved it so much that this is going to be a full review of rambling about how wonderful this was. Bear with me, please!
'Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want to Come' is basically a funny, tragic, wonderful 'journal' of an introvert who decides that she is too lonely without her friends in London and needs to remedy her social circle by being more extroverted for a year. What ensues are hilarious fails (did you know the Queen of England is Victoria? Yeah, me neither) and wonderful wins (hello new friends: Hannah, Lily and Vivian all sound like friends I would love). As if this wasn't already enough to convince anyone to pick this book up, Jess is also just genuinely, really funny and I blame the crowds for the times her comedy shows went awry. At what point, do we become friends now, Jess? Or do I know too much already?
Honestly, this is such a feel-good book, it's ridiculous. I am one of those (evil? horrible?) extroverts (who by the way sleeps really well at night, thanks for worrying though) and was immediately drawn in by the description. The book itself is even better. I had several laugh out loud moments which turned into louder laughter when I remembered this wasn't just a fictional character doing all these things, but an actual real-life person. I don't hand out 5 stars just to anyone, but Jess more than deserves them. What an absolute delight to read. I'm still glowing from how happy this made me. Thank you so much to NetGalley and the publisher for a copy of this. No, honestly. Thank you! You've made my life so much better with this gift.

Sorry I’m Late, I Didn’t Want to Come by Jessica Pan has been one of my favorite reads of this Spring. Part memoir, part self-help, this book was funny, forgiving, and wholehearted.

In this Book, Pan tells us stories about the year that she decided to start saying yes and pushing her boundaries more. She talks about being an introvert, being a depressed introvert, being a depressed introvert with anxiety, and also doing all of those things while sitting in a sauna fully clothed. (Don't ask.)

Some of the stories she shared made me laugh, and some of them made me pause and look inward, but each of them was unique and fun and a special challenge to the reader to examine their own lives. At times, I too have felt that “my life was passing me by” and the struggle that Pan describes is authentic and validating.

I love this kind of book and it is right up my alley. Jessica Pan, like Jenny Lawson or Brene Brown, has an uncanny knack for making you laugh and insightful profundity at the same time. I felt empowered, amused, and satisfied by the end of this delightful book and I would highly recommend it to anyone.

Received this ARC in exchange for an honest review.

I loved this book! It shows just how amazing those experiences that we think are going to be uncomfortable can be if we push past our anxiety and experience new things!

Part memoir, part self-help, Jessica Pan takes on a challenge that literally makes my palms sweat and heart race, and lives to relay the tale. In recounting her experience “extroverting” for a year, she shares tips and tricks that seem basic enough for a 10 year old, but are helpful for introverts like me for whom holding a conversation with a stranger is a mentally demanding task. There were parts of the book I related to less than others, mainly because Jessica is a “shintrovert” (a shy introvert), and I’m just an introvert, but overall it was a rewarding read that challenged me to rethink the excuses I make as an introvert. I’d recommend it for any introvert willing to push themselves outside their comfort zone to experience all life has to offer.

Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC!!

As a shy introvert frequently known as a "shintrovert", Jessica Pan decided to take a year to step out of her shell and enter the "extroverted world". After a family crisis in her family turned into a light bulb moment she realized she was lacking in the friend's department. She decided to take this time to focus on connecting with new people who might just turn into the good friends she was hoping for in her own life.

She shares her trials and tribulations and also the things she learned along the way...many of which, pleasantly surprised her. This book was insightful and humorous and if this title catches your eye, you might enjoy it too!

As an introvert, this book was painful for me to read at times. I so appreciated Jessica Pan's quest to live her life as an extrovert for one year. She writes conversationally and her ability to laugh at herself and situations made the experience enlightening. I admire her willingness to share her journey. I would liken it to Shonda Rhimes' The Year of Yes, both in tone and in humor.
I received my copy through NetGalley under no obligation.

I loved Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want to Come. As an introvert, Jessica Pan is so relatable. I do try to say yes to think I don't want to do, but I can't imagine doing it on this scale. It was fun and mortifying to read her experiences in extroverting. I got stressed out, my palms got clammy, and I inevitably cheered for her when she overcame extreme reticence and did extroverted things. My favorite essay was her Moth podcast experience. I can't imagine telling a personal story in front of so many strangers.

If you're an introvert, ambivert, or just an extrovert who is curious about the inner thoughts of introverts, definitely check this one out.

4 stars! ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Just while reading the introduction of this book, I could already relate to it SO MUCH! It was super interesting to read her journey throughout the year. It was a fun, light hearted read with lots of funny parts!

If you’re also an introvert, I highly recommend checking this one out! It’s out in stores TODAY May 28, 2019!

Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for providing a free advanced copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

As I read about your experiences, I nodded my head at your fears and worries. But I also cheered you on. Some of the things you jumped out and did – improve, live comedy, traveling alone to a strange city – made me initially recoil. But you did them and then told us readers about what happened. Then bared your soul to write it all in the book. Thank you for sharing from other mentors the information that most people do want to wave back and to enter a conversation. They just usually need someone else to get the ball rolling. I am enthused by your statement that “things that seem impossible can suddenly become possible.”

So yes, I lived vicariously through some of your year and would probably not have the courage for some things but I admire the heck out of you because you went for it and didn’t back down. Your book will help me try to ask Deep Talk questions, to creep a little bit outside my shell, to take a few more risks though honestly I’d rather try and climb Everest than do stand up comedy. B

If you’re an introvert go get a copy of this book!
OMG! This book! It was like reading a mirror. In my notes I wrote “this lady might actually be me.” I mean she even moved to China and took a job that terrified her. I took a job in China that forced me to spend 18 hours a week teaching a class of strangers and the other 22 hours planning (read stressing) about those classes. It was awful and amazing. I did both better and worse than I ever imagined I could and it was mostly better. Reading Jessica Pan’s experience of such a similar situation was rewarding and made me feel connected to a complete stranger like only a good book can.
Jessica Pan even had the same reaction to Quiet by Susan Cain as I did. I felt so relieved reading Quiet. It felt like it was okay to be more for once and it was okay to not want to talk to complete strangers and make friends in public places for no reason other than liking people. And just like Pan I used Quiet as an excuse to “accept” the introvert version of myself.
“I had taken my introvert status as a license to wall myself off from others.”
What that means was that I decided I had a license to hide from the whole world until I started to become agoraphobic and had a real panic attack every time I went into WalMart. I didn’t spend much time out of the house. I finished my master’s degree online and then stayed home with nothing to do and no one to talk to (my husband worked) and slowly retreated to a very dark place where there was no reason to wake up. Fast forward through China, finding out I have thyroid tumors (most likely benign), a couple self-help books, and the realization that I am responsible for my life and here I am today working in my career as a librarian and working at WalMart smiling and complimenting complete strangers. No panic attacks yet.
The only negative I have found in this is that it sometimes makes me less empathetic towards people who have anxiety. I still have anxiety, but it is much less than it was a year ago. I find myself inwardly shrugging when people tell me they haven’t taken enough anxiety meds to handle a slightly difficult day. I have to remind myself that one year ago I should have had a few doses of anxiety meds to handle getting out of bed before three in the afternoon. I have absolutely no room to judge anyone.
There were times when I thought “I’m not this bad” like when Jess is going to give a speech she stresses about for a month before it. But it was a speech for 900 people so I can only imagine the freak out and hyperventilating I would do in that situation. And when I started to feel too smug about how I would handle a speech well I remembered that I basically gave myself an ulcer from stressing myself out over teaching classes. Sooo yeah, take that self-righteous Kenzie.
However, I would still like to issue a small challenge. If you’re struggling, try one thing that makes you shudder. It doesn’t have to be “big” by anyone’s standards but yours.
“Nobody waves but everybody waves back.”
I’m very much the dive into cold water type of person so when I couldn’t handle a basic conversation with anyone I threw myself into one of the most populated foreign countries and forced myself to teach groups of teenagers for three hours per class. This is soo not what everyone should do. Small steps are very good.
I thought it was interesting that being an introvert stayed with Pan while traveling. I get that you don’t change just because your location does so it makes sense, but I’m judging it based on my experience. In my case I moved to China and I made a commitment to making friends and meeting new people. Basically while I was in China I pulled a “Jessica Pan” and tried to extrovert. It was easier because when I just couldn’t do it I could hide behind my husband. I also met another introvert who was the best and became known as a “goth on the inside.” Note: my husband is goth on the outside and that is how the subject came up for comparison.
This was such a rewarding read not only for the times when it felt like a reflection, but also for the times when it made me feel triumphant for the things I’m now able to do that I couldn’t do before.
I had one judgmental moment about her husband. **sort of spoiler** Her dad might die and her husband doesn’t even come with her? That was weird for me, but hey every relationship is different. **end of spoiler**
I would recommend this book for anyone who is an introvert or who loves an introvert. This book is especially great if you want to challenge yourself to be a little more gregarious.


Update May 10th
I found a work around by using another computer so now I will be able to read this and provide better feedback. YAY!!!

Original feedback:
I really want to be able to read this book, but I couldn't get it to open on my computer. I'll keep trying, but for now I just have to say I would have loved to read this. I know I would have related to this book as an introvert that recently went to China and felt the need to be an extrovert for the five months I was there and I haven't changed back into an introvert, at least not as much of one as I was.

Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want to Come is something all of us could have said at one point in our lives if we were being more honest and less polite.

It's also the title of Jessica Pan's hilarious and insightful memoir, chronicling a year in this shy introvert's life as she challenges herself to spend a year talking to strangers, accepting social invitations, making new friends, and otherwise living like an extrovert.

Jessica Pan is very down to earth, and the book reads like a conversation with a good friend. It's no surprise to hear that she is accepted to do a storytelling event with The Moth- when you hear this story you will laugh, cringe, and smile right along with her.

Pan consults experts in areas such as social anxiety, public speaking, charisma, and stand-up comedy and uses the information she gathers to take steps outside her comfort zone. She shares this insight, information from her research, and personal observations and experiences with readers.

The result is inspiring and informative; I can't remember the last book I highlighted so many passages to refer back to. I found it relatable as an introvert, but I feel that what Pan has to say could help more than those like herself.

I'd recommend this fast and insightful read to introverts, those that love them, people who want to get outside their comfort zones, improve their public speaking skills, make new friends, or have more meaningful connections with people in their lives. I believe that anyone reading could find something to take away from this fun book.

I enjoyed this book! I thought it was really funny and well-written, and i definitely identified with it as an introvert. Some of the situations that Jessica put herself into gave me a bit of anxiety, but I loved to see how she dealt with her uncertainty. I think this book was a good reminder to step out of my comfort zone more often!

I loved this book! A lifelong introvert (shintrovert - shy introvert) decides to try out some extroverted activities in an attempt to become more outgoing. For a year, the author participates in activities like improv, stand-up, talking to strangers, and traveling alone. Though this is my worst nightmare, I found this book engaging and inspiring, and I found myself wanting to try a similar experiment. I would definitely purchase this book for my library, and I think any introvert could benefit from giving it a read.

Wow! What a fantastic journey! I loved Jessica Pan's writing and appreciate the way she opened herself up to the world and exposed some of her deepest fears and dragged us readers along (willingly) on her journey to face them and challenge the things that she finds most terrifying. Kudos to her for being willing to do this to herself -- Ms. Pan, you probably don't know how much you've done for all the other introverts out here in the world!

When I think of overcoming some of the things I find difficult as an introvert, I'm thinking joining Toastmasters is a step out of my comfort zone. Improv? Standup comedy? Acting in a play? Asking unwitting strangers crazy questions? It's clear it's all a journey and none of this stuff will kill you, although it probably feels like it should. Loved her wry sense of humor and sense of optimism tinged with dread that's imbued throughout the book, and I am amazed by her sense of purpose and courage to put herself out there just to see if she can accomplish her goals (when she could have just curled up on the sofa and read a book or binge watched Netflix). Just saying.

I recommended this book to a good friend, with this caveat: Don't sit down and read it all at once like a novel. This book needs to be savored, and can't be appreciated as well if you just plow through it to get 'er done. I will make sure we incorporate this book in our displays at my library and will push it through readers' advisory. This would be a great read for our book club.

Please give this woman another book contract, Pronto! I'd give it 10 stars if I could.

Ever feel like your introvert personality is holding you back in life? Keeping you from meeting new people, making new friends, chasing your dreams? Maybe it's time you embraced the extrovert side that's just dying to come out. That's exactly what Jessica Pan did for a year. Instead of remaining shy and trying to avoid a lot of contact with people, she decided to push herself in a bunch of different ways - talking to strangers on the train, traveling alone, taking an improv class, even doing some public speaking! Along the way, she meets many interesting people who advise her on the best way to be more social and open to surprises in life.

As an introvert myself, I could relate 100 percent to the anecdotes Pan includes. I too would run the opposite direction from stand-up comedy classes or dinner parties (I hate small talk!) Although I'm not as brave as Pan, I really admired her courage to face her fears. She writes with a funny, yet emotional tone, so it's easy to connect with her. I really loved the writing style and tone of this book and will definitely recommend it to my fellow introverts.

When I was a junior, my high school offered a poetry writing contest.
I entered and didn't tell a soul.
No one knew until it was announced over the loud speaker that I had won first place.
Teachers, friends, classmates, my parents.... were SHOCKED.
The even bigger catch....
I had to read my poem (which also had a visual aspect) in front of the school board, along with all the other winners.

I wanted to throw up. I cried on the drive there. I was so thankful I included my visual aspect (I wrote my poem in the shape of a question mark and only included questions in the poem). Which they displayed on the big screen at the front of the room. I thought, "Good, people will be looking at that and not me."

I got up there, I read my poem, got off stage and asked my mom how I did and if you could tell my face was covered in bright red fire up there.... and her response?
"I didn't look at you because I thought it'd make you more nervous."
LOL THANKS MOM.

But honestly, I'm glad I did it. I've given countless presentations since then and I think that was the first one that kicked me in the ass. That being said, Jessica Pan struggled with a lot of the same issues and she set out on a year of extroversion. She was determined to make her friends, better herself, and even got a few fun stories out of it.

Now I could never imagine doing some of the stuff she did, ex. see chapters "Everest or Stand Up Comedy" and "La-La-Land or Traveling Solo."

But I see a lot of myself in her and finally understand why I hate small talk...it's because I want the meat of what makes people tick. I want to know intimate details about their lives and understand who they were when they were living through it. I don't care how the weather is, I don't care that traffic was bad. I want to know WHY you love/hate this weather or what was really bothering you when that guy cut you off in traffic.

Her year of extroverting gave her a new sense of what it means to be an introvert.
She found a happy medium between the two and I think we could all use a little help finding that line.

Huge thank you to NetGalley, Andrew McNeels Publishing, and to Jessica Pan for providing me with a copy of Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want to Come.

I am so glad I found this book!

A funny introspective memoir of Pan, a self-described "shintrovert" (shy introvert) who takes a year to live like an extrovert. She challenges the way she uses introversion as a crutch to avoid certain things that made her scared or uncomfortable. She takes improv classes, surprise trips, learns how to make friends.

Pan balances appreciating introversion, but knowing when to embrace extrovert tactics in order to be a bit less lonely. While I am a deep shintrovert, Pan made me think about the ways I, too, use my introversion to avoid doing stuff i just don't want to do and look for ways to challenge myself more. Though I will NEVER take an improv class.

The author is funny and honest, challenging without attacking, always acknowledging that her experience is her own, never trying to NOT be an introvert. A delightful read.

I feel like I somehow wrote this book (or at least the begining) and didn't even realize it. Jessica Pan describes how you can be a "shy introvert" and, oh my god, it describes me 100%. She references the book <i>Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking</i> (which I added to my TBR list), writing that introverts concentrate well, relish solitude, dislike small talk, love one-on-one conversations, and avoid public speaking. On the same note, Pan writes that she as a "very real allergy" to small talk (i.e. discussing jobs, weather, and commutes) and how introverts hate chit chat. Yep....totally me.

Basically, I really enjoyed the premise of this book: an introvert trying to branch out out of her comfort zone and be around people when she'd rather be home curled up on her couch. It made me realize that sometimes we need to get out of our comfort zone (even if its scary as hell) and try to meet people because as humans we're meant to be social beings. In a time of social media when we can just hide behind screens all day long, getting some face-to-face interaction with people is still necessary.

However, no matter how desperately this introvert might want to interact with new people and make new friends, you will never catch me doing improv or performing stand up. I'd rather listen to nails on a chalkboard for an hour.

What would happen if a shy introvert lived like a gregarious extrovert for one year? If she knowingly and willingly put herself in perilous social situations that she’d normally avoid at all costs? Writer Jessica Pan intends to find out. With the help of various extrovert mentors, Jessica sets up a series of personal challenges (talk to strangers, perform stand-up comedy, host a dinner party, travel alone, make friends on the road, and much, much worse) to explore whether living like an extrovert can teach her lessons that might improve the quality of her life. Chronicling the author’s hilarious and painful year of misadventures, this book explores what happens when one introvert fights her natural tendencies, takes the plunge, and tries (and sometimes fails) to be a little bit braver.

I could relate to this book so much! There were so many times I laughed and said sounds like something I would do. I've always wanted to try and not be introverted, so it was great reading what the author went through. She was funny and honest, I loved it!

Thank you #NetGalley for the ARC of #SorryImLateIdidntWantToCome
Pub Date: 28 May 2019

Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want to Come: An Introvert's Year of Living Dangerously was a sweet natured read. Being an introvert myself I was immediately attracted to this book (like all other introverts I think) because I eagerly wanted see how an introvert would go living as an extrovert. It thus wasn't completely what I had expected. There were no gloriously huge mishaps or dramatic sequences (as I had hoped), but rather calculated experiences in how to put one's self out there. While this was essentially what I started the book for, I found Jessica Pan's comedic approach towards every event slightly overbearing. With everything constantly exaggerated, the truly funny moments were lost to me in the chatter of trying to bring every experience up to the same level. I'm not sure if this was to compensate for the lack of 'drama' throughout the book, but I do feel a more serious tone would have been welcome. The truly comedic moments would have been able to shine and the inclusion of real life statistics and conversations with experts (which I found really interesting), would not have been as jarring and disruptive to the flow of the text. I actually would have loved more real world information and numbers on loneliness and today's expected societal standards.

I don't know why Marley and Me comes to mind as an example when I think of the tone I wish this book had... possibly because the balance between comedy and just telling the story was so perfect. The comedic moments just arrived by a matter of fact rather than being forced into existence through exaggerated descriptions.

Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want to Come overall is a really interesting read. It was insightful and informative, and I would recommend it to any introvert and even extrovert who wants to gain insight into our little brains. Regardless of my preferences for a more serious tone, the light-hearted nature of the book made the information presented enjoyable and easy to read. A very informative and fun book.

I really enjoyed this book by Jessica Pan. I did a similar experiment a few years ago which I called the "Year of Yes" where I forced myself to say "yes" to anything someone invited me to in an effort to make more friends and strengthen my current relationships. Jessica's stories rang so true and are fun and. engaging to read through. Her humor also is enjoyable and this book reads like chatting with a good friend and laughing about how awkward meeting new people is (because, well... it is).

This book is about how the life of an introvert changed by forcing herself to do extrovert things.

As an extrovert some parts seem kind of weird an not relatable, but it did help me to watch different situations in other personality point of view. It was interesting to read how the life of an introvert is and how they manage certain situations that for me are totally normal. Even when I couldn't relate to certain parts I did enjoy the humor within the story.


Thanks for giving me the opportunity of reading this book.

Cancelled plans? Yes, please. A quiet night with just a book and my favorite blanket to cuddle up with while the hours whittle away? You better believe it.

This book was cute and witty while still delivering the point of “Yes! You can and should put yourself out there...because life is best lived when it’s actually lived.”

I look forward to reading more by Jessica Pan, her originality and humor make uncomfortable comfortable when it comes to stepping outside the box...

**4 Stepping Out, Stars**

A lot of the stuff she forced herself to try was waaaaaay out of my comfort zone.
Mad props to her for giving it a go and I was happy to live vicariously through her.
The author is funny and has a way of making you feel a part of the story.
I'm not sure if that's because I related so much to her story or if she is just that awesome.
One will never know.
Thanks to NetGalley and Andrews McMeel Publishing for my DRC.

3.5 💓

This book was really good. I know, it's just someone talking about a personal experience, and I'm not so into this things, but it was interesting and brainwarming. Reading this book I understanded that I'm not so introvert as I think I was. Well, there are different kind of introvert people around the world and everyone has a personal view of the problems with external world. I thought I was a "big" introvert because I'm not a party-person, but I think it depends on who you are with, if you feel comfortable with these persons and so on. One thing is that: I LOVE talking in front of an audience, expecially when the main theme is something I like and feel passionate about. At University sometime Ineed to make a speech to enter the exams, and I'm anxious, but adrenaline is my friend in these cases and, after the presentation, I feels so good and powerful and happy and I think is because I love talking about interesting things. So, the book can show dfferent sides of the introver theme, and you can see yourself in many lines, but you are a unique person, who has unique abilities and unique interests, and the first step to feel good is to feel comfortable with yourself. Then you can go outside and meet people, try new things and enjoy your time. It's good to be alone sometime, it gives you time to understand yourself and your world, but the human brain needs incentives to work and let you feel good and happy. So, everywhere you are, you need to think that you are not alone, you can find something new in everyday, even if this new thing is like a little cactus to cure. You can find the beauty everywhere, so do not be afraid and go outside. Little by little you'll find something beautiful outside your door.

I could not stop nodding my head in agreement while I was reading this book! If you're an introvert, you'll feel the same way. I loved all her personal challenges and felt inspired to try a few of my own! The book is well-written and feels like you're talking with a friend.

Well, this book made me a bit anxious reading it.
As an introvert myself I really can't imagine myself for a year acting the way this woman did. Being social at parties,being involved in plays,public speaking etc. It makes me cringe to even imagine such a thing.
Now there were admittedly some funny scenes with the repercussions of her actions as I shook my head saying, not me. No way could I do this!

Pub Date 28 May 2019
I was given a complimentary copy of this book. Thank you.
All opinions expressed are my own.

I would like to thank the publisher for giving me a copy of this book via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

This was a fun read and I really enjoyed it!!

Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want to Come was a well-written and thoughtful read. Through Jessica Pan's book, all the self-declared introverts who have ever wondered what it would be like to do "extroverted" things like tell a story on-stage or make friends with strangers can live vicariously. Pan's reflections on the ways in which she socially challenged herself, combined with the advice she obtained from field experts, demonstrate that maybe there can be a comfortable middle-ground between introversion and extroversion after all.

I liked this book! The author was honest about her shyness and fear of social settings. Though I can't quite relate, but honestly I have no idea if I am more of an introvert or an extrovert (depends on my mood), I admire the courage it took to overcome her fear. There is nothing wrong with being an introvert, but if it is hindering you from meeting new people and experiencing things, time to read this book!

Love Nick's quote: "Nobody waves, but everyone waves back."

Thank you NetGalley and publisher for this book.

I received an e-copy of this book from the publisher via NetGalley. Thank you!

A young woman, self-described introvert (or even "shintrovert" - shy introvert), decides to take time to try and overcome her introverted nature - because she realizes she is very lonely and has no idea how to make new friends. To that end, she attends meetings with "charisma couches", improv classes, and performs onstage. All described in a light, witty voice.

Overall, it was a joy to read, prompting many laugh-out-loud and read-out-loud moments. Still, as a fellow introvert, I have to say that doing improv and performing comedy standup sound like absolute nightmare. I mean, I guess I can see the point of the former - making friends in the improv class - but the latter? Shudder. Nope.

To each their own, though, and even if I don't agree (spiritually ;)) with all the choices Jessica Pan has made on the journey described in this book, I still think that it is a book very much worth reading. Not necessarily as a guide, mind you - as a very fun effort.

Being an introvert, this book was completely relatable. I'm sure there are some people that don't see the big deal in walking up to a stranger and starting a conversation with them, but I am not one of those. Reading about Jessica taking a year to try and be an extrovert made me wonder what it would be like if I were to do the same. Honestly, I think I'm good in my little introvert shell, but I enjoyed reading about her adventures. I do however want to go to England now and ask people who the queen is, because it seems some people like to mess with tourists.

It was interesting to see how her life evolved as she went through the year. It was like she changed but remained the same at the same time, if that makes any sense at all. We all put ourselves in little boxes, but this book shows that sometimes it's okay to leave them for a minute and see what else is out there. The box will still be there when we get back.

I received a copy of this book from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

Author: Jessica Pan
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
Publication Date: 28 May 2019

I was given a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

I am an introvert, through and through, so this book sounded fascinating to me! I know my strengths and my weaknesses, and let me tell you, much of the things she forced herself to do gave me anxiety! Huge props to her! This book was witty and well written. I thoroughly enjoyed it!

Very intriguing and somewhat relatable topic. I was cracking up at some points and scratching my head at others...mostly wondering how the pendulum could swing so much for a true introvert. Regardless, this was a fun, worthwhile read for anyone on the “I” spectrum. The human brain is so trainable—apparently even with personality traits, to a degree. Thanks to the author and publisher for a copy in exchange for an honest review.

Laughing and trying to understand the pain associated with neurosis, is a twist for this book reader. Seeing the author expand her world is crafty creatively and kept my attention. Some of the "perilous" social situations carried a common ring even for me, not an introvert. Interesting read. loved the unique design in her life of "danger'

This was a very relatable and humorous book about an introverted woman who, feeling lonely in a new country without a friend group, decided to attempt to be an extrovert for one year. In this time, she spoke to stranger, traveled alone, went to conferences, parties, and get-togethers, tried improv and comedy, and played hostess. In short, everything every introvert dreads. To her surprise, she found that she made friends and had some fun. That is not to say there weren't some bad moments as well, or that she would choose to live that way full-time for the rest of her life, but she found that sometimes forcing oneself to be extroverted had benefits. I enjoyed her story and her triumphs, though, in classic introvert fashion, I think I'll stick to just reading about most of them myself.

Sorry I'm Late, I Didn't Want to Come- Otherwise known as what I think EVERY TIME I go to a social event. Jessica Pan is a witty "shintrovert" (shy introvert), that I could relate to in more ways than one. I struggled to start reading this book, but I'm glad I stuck with it. I was intrigued by her decision to quit her job after receiving the award for staying late at work (having no social life), and pretty much hooked after that. The way she described her depression and caving in upon herself in such an honest way made me realize that I may be in the same situation as her. As she repeatedly states, meeting friends after age 30 is ridiculously hard. I, myself, have tried the friend-dating scene and failed miserably at my attempts to make a connection. I laughed and cringed while reading this book. Many of the situations she (willingly!) put herself in were one of my worst nightmares, and many times I was relieved that it was her in the story and not me (sorry, Mrs. Pan)!
Although I read this book mostly for the humor, I'm pleasantly surprised to admit that I may actually have learned something from the book as well. (Why isn't charisma and small talk a subject taught in school?!)
For introverts looking for a good read, with a few chuckles, cringes, and even some ah-ha moments dropped in, I highly recommend Jessica Pan's book.


P.S. I just forgot, does England have a Queen and if so, what's her name?

This is the kind of book that was made for me -- a shy introvert that would rather spend time with her books and blankets than at a raucous get-together. That said, this is a book that chronicles a year of the author's life as she tries to break free from the binds of introversion. Pan does all that an introvert facing this type of challenge would do: turn to apps to find new friends, sign up for improv classes, perform on stage, and take a chance that smiling at someone would make them smile back. Simple, right?

This book does provide inspiration for those introverts like myself who know that with a little push in the right direction, we can occasionally participate in an extroverted world and not die of embarrassment, boredom, or stale cake in Budapest. I think it's a lovely idea to step out of your comfort zone and participate in things that you just couldn't see yourself doing, though like the author, you really do need to have a solid support system in order to encourage the fear to take a backseat. Aside from making me want to do more socially adventurous things, this book is also full of humor and an honesty that you can only get from the introverts of the world.

This book was at turns hilarious and caused much head-nodding by this reader in agreement and wonder. Yes, apparently many people think and feel the same way about various social interactions. It is always a comfort to realize you are not the only one to feel a certain way.

This author may not be a natural at stand-up comedy, BUT she completely blew me away with her writing. I understand that some of that credit goes to editors, Beta-readers, etc., but the meat of the book is HER. And she is friggin' hysterical. Or at the very least, can tell a story that would be humiliating with inner snarky monologue that makes it funny enough to read and laugh and not cringe and put the book down as carefully as possible to pretend that you didn't just read that.

I honestly still have quotes from the book floating in my head and they pop up at random times to make me smile or laugh.

This book was a brave endeavor by a very introverted women who wanted to see if she could live differently and still respect her boundaries, to see what boundaries she needed to be comfortable and happy and what she should move, change, or do away with altogether. She had/has guts and I respect her for that. I wouldn't have done a good portion of what she did, but I respect that she did it and that she seems to be happier now.

This was an amazingly funny and insightful book. I highly recommend it to just about everyone, those who are introverts and extroverts. It doesn't matter which you are, since most people are a mix, it would be very surprising if you didn't see a bit of yourself in her struggles and triumphs. A very human book.

5, introspective and funny, stars. Worth the read, definitely!

My thanks to NetGalley and Andrews McMeel Publishing for an eARC copy of this book to read and review.

Sorry I'm late but I didn't want to come is the story of my life. The title is, not the actual plot of the book. The plot is pretty much one of my wildest introvert fantasies lived and narrated by someone who I feel could be my best friend.

I went from pretending to be an extrovert during my teenage years, through acceptance and the introvert revolution and right into hermit. I'm a person of extremes. Living in a new city, getting into my 30s and starting to lose friends, all these has driven me into picturing all kinds of scenarios in my mind. What would happen if I actually gave a damn and tried being more social?

Jessica Pan hit rock bottom, that point where there is no other way than up. She was crippled by her introversion and mostly about her shyness. She longed for meaningful connections with others. Cue that epiphanic moment that forces one to just change.
Then, she commits to a year of extroverting aka doing everything that’s out of her comfort zone: from talking to strangers on the street up to doing stand up comedy.

Jess can write light and funny, full of witty pop reference. She’s like an introverted Lorelai Gilmore. In that whole year, she had ups and downs, wins and fails, and you can feel her joy as well as her anxiety and fear through her writing. She interlaces personal moments in her life and deep reflections with the experiment, which add a layer of meaningfulness and make this book a roller-coaster of a read.

I don’t want to spoil anyone, but I have seen a lot of people concerned about this book being some kind of extrovert propaganda. I want to assure you that by the end of the book, the author has learnt a lot about herself and her introversion, but even more about extroverts and the fact that the lack of human connection is not only a thing of the shy.

Thanks to Andrews McMeel Publishing and NetGalley for providing this arc in exchange for an honest review!

What an interesting book. I thought the information presented was well laid out and flowed well. I really enjoyed reading it and want to try and start implementing some of what I read.

I really love this book. As an introvert mys life, I feel all the authors’s pain of being awkward and feeling out of place at social gatherings. I admire Jessica’s courage and picked up a few tips of things to try myself, although improv comedy may just be a step too far for me personally!

This was a memoir of a year of an introvert trying to be more extroverted. This book was at times serious and at time hysterically funny. As the author negotiates through a series of challenges to lessen her unhappiness, she finds a new circle of friends and some confidence to step out of her comfort zone. I loved the information that was brought in from academic sources as well.

Jessica Pan has written one of the most related books for me personally! It is great to know there are more people like me out there. Jessica offers an amazing insight into her life as she says to new things coming her way, which I find courageous and inspiring. It is a great read and I’m excited to follow her example by taking on her attitude of life.

This is the book that made me realize I am not alone in feeling this way. I, too, am a happy introvert - I do not want to change that about myself, but making friends is harder when it doesn't come naturally to you.

This book is not really a self-help book, more of Jessica's adventures in her year of trying to make new friends and saying yes to situations introverts would usually avoid. It's inspiring.

In this book, the author really goes outside her comfort zone - stand up comedy classes and improvisation theatre, and also talks with experts that offer great advice for the reader too. But my favourite thing is that she keeps it real: things don't always go as planned, life is not perfect, some people might not want to be your friends and that's okay. But put yourself out there.

I received this book in exchange of an honest review from NetGalley. All opinions are my own.

I absolutely loved this book! I honestly don't know why it took me so long to finish it and I'm sorry that I didn't get to it even sooner; although I'm convinced that I picked it up when I really needed it most. I've already recommended it to countless friends who've mentioned something in passing and my brain would ping back to things mentioned in this book. It's not a self-help book but it's filled with such relatable experiences. Not only that but Jessica was just downright hilarious! I don't think there was one chapter in which I didn't laugh my ass off at least once (seriously).

This book brought me great comfort at a time when I was feeling such debilitating anxiety and stress due to an event in my life that required me to speak in front of close to 100 people, followed by networking with all those people who just witnessed me most likely make a fool of myself. Public speaking is still insanely uncool but when I came across Pan's own experience with it in this book, I found myself completely awed and enamored by her courage to get up on that stage to face one of everyone's greatest fears. It wasn't smooth sailing, and to be honest, my actions at the time mirrored hers in the book 100% (i.e. pushing off making my presentation until the very last minute due to intense fear). But it made me want to steel myself and plunge forward just like her. Obviously, it wasn't as simple as wanting to do it, but the fact that she, someone who I saw big parts of myself reflected in, could do it, then I could too, right?

There's no greater comfort in knowing that there are others out there who experience the same fears, and feelings of loneliness, as well as anxiety about what to do with it. Like Pan all my friends are scattered across the globe and since moving to where I am now and entering my 30s, I've noticed it has become progressively harder to make friends. Or even to just meet people in general. While I couldn't see myself doing half of the things she did, I liked the insight that she gave through her experiences. I think at the end of the day, it's not really about realizing being extroverted or introverted is better than the other, but knowing that putting yourself out there, even when you really don't feel like it, can often times lead to really great, and sometimes even life changing things.

This was such a fantastic read and I know that I'll always want to keep it on my shelf so that I can go back to it whenever I'm feeling overwhelmed by my increasing need to introvert. This book was written in a very conversational tone so that none of the moments felt dull and it kind of felt like just chatting to a friend. I'm so looking forward to read what else Jessica Pan has to offer in the future. She has got a big fan in me! I'd definitely like to be her friend :)

Thanks to Netgalley, Jessica Pan and Andrews McMeel Publishing for providing the ebook in exchange for an honest review.

When I read the blurb here, I immediately felt a kinship with Jessica Pan. As an introvert myself (although fortunately not a shy one) the truth of the title resonated deeply with me, and like Jessica, I too have declined invitations simply because I was peopled out, and would rather snuggle up on my couch with a book or my knitting.

So her challenge of saying yes to everything for a change is one that at the same time appealed to me and terrified me. Yes to improv? Absolutely, sign me up! I LOVE that stuff! Yes to stand-up comedy? Meh... would require somebody else to write my material, but otherwise, ok (I don't have a funny bone in my body, but love being on stage). Yes to friend-dates? Sure... it's a one-on-one situation, it could work. Yes to a solo vacation where I'm not allowed to buy guidebooks but have to rely on asking locals for advice? Meep! Yes to networking events and - gasp - talking to strangers on the bus? Noooooooo!!!!

I was a bit hesitant at first, because it seemed like this could very easily just be one cringe-worthy experience after the other, and some of the first forays into the world of extroverting did indeed end up that way, but as the year progressed and Jessica found more and more mentors to help her through - and made more and more friends along the way! - it became both a pleasant and a motivating read. I don't know that I'll go out and sign up for the friendship version of tinder anytime soon, but it's quite refreshing to know that while people might not wave - everybody waves back.